HomeLatest ThreadsGreatest ThreadsForums & GroupsMy SubscriptionsMy Posts
DU Home » Latest Threads » Forums & Groups » Main » General Discussion (Forum) » Trump Boys Frantically Bu...

Fri Aug 24, 2018, 01:52 AM

Trump Boys Frantically Burning Stacks Of Printed-Out Emails To Eliminate Paper Trail



WASHINGTON—After learning that their father’s associates Paul Manafort and Michael Cohen were guilty of crimes and Special Counsel Robert Mueller’s investigation was continuing to expand, Eric and Donald Trump Jr. were reportedly frantically burning stacks of their printed-out emails Wednesday to eliminate their paper trail.

“Okay, Eric, I think we melted down all the stuff we wrote from last year so now Mr. Mueller can’t never find it—time to start wrecking all the emails from this year,” said Trump Jr., who, along with his brother, had stayed up all night printing out every single email ever sent or received by either of the boys and setting the stacks of paper ablaze in a plastic garbage can to eliminate any evidence that could be used against them in an investigation.

“We gotta type up copies of our texts so we can print them out and burn those, too—you can’t be too careful with the witch hunt. And once we finish burning all the evidence, we have to take pictures of our faces on Instagram and then print out those, too, and burn them so we can delete our identities. Then we have to leave and never come back, okay? We have to go to one of the small dots on a map where they can’t find us.”

At press time, the Trump boys were attempting to erase any trace of their deliberate destruction of evidence by using masking tape to secure rocks to the top of the printer and pushing the device into the depths of the Lincoln Memorial Reflecting Pool where it would “never, ever be found.”

https://politics.theonion.com/trump-boys-frantically-burning-stacks-of-printed-out-em-1828532224

6 replies, 1995 views

Reply to this thread

Back to top Alert abuse

Always highlight: 10 newest replies | Replies posted after I mark a forum
Replies to this discussion thread
Arrow 6 replies Author Time Post
Reply Trump Boys Frantically Burning Stacks Of Printed-Out Emails To Eliminate Paper Trail (Original post)
Zorro Aug 2018 OP
GWC58 Aug 2018 #1
Puzzler Aug 2018 #2
Historic NY Aug 2018 #3
LiberalFighter Aug 2018 #4
dalton99a Aug 2018 #5
Blue Owl Aug 2018 #6

Response to Zorro (Original post)

Fri Aug 24, 2018, 01:58 AM

1. Gotta love the Onion!

😂

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Zorro (Original post)

Fri Aug 24, 2018, 01:58 AM

2. It's literally impossible to tell at first read anymore

if The Onion is joking or not!

Who’d a thunk it?

Strange times!

-Puzzler

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Zorro (Original post)

Fri Aug 24, 2018, 08:31 AM

3. I love tweeting this stuff out to Dumbfuckistan.....

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Zorro (Original post)

Fri Aug 24, 2018, 08:57 AM

4. They should probably also burn the money they used while committing their crimes and will be using.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Zorro (Original post)

Fri Aug 24, 2018, 09:02 AM

5. Good one

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Zorro (Original post)

Fri Aug 24, 2018, 01:26 PM

6. Thank God the evidence is destroyed!!1

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink

Reply to this thread