The way teenaged boys talk about girls.

[milestogo]

Its been 40 years since I was a teenager, but I'm going to assume that some things haven't changed very much.

In high school I heard the following story: On a Saturday afternoon, one of the varsity basketball players had a dozen teammates over to his house. Players 16 year old sister was home, and she had sexual intercourse with 9 or 10 of the boys. It was free sex for any guy who wanted to lose his virginity. The way it was told to me - she was really horny and couldn't get enough. The Teenaged boy who told the story said she was a "slut". The next week the story was all over school.

The girl was in my gym class at one point, but I only knew her to say hello to. She missed some school around that time. The last time I saw her she performed a modern dance at my high school's Baccalaureate. It was beautiful. I remember thinking it contrasted with the reputation she had gained as a result of the incident. I never saw her again.

If she did have sex with 9 or 10 boys on a Saturday afternoon, I'm going to take a guess that it wasn't consensual. I had never heard of sexual assault at that age, but looking back it makes a lot more sense to me than the teenaged boy's story of what happened. She may have not figured out for a long time that it was rape. But I am guessing that to this day, the boys involved don't see themselves as rapists.

[saidsimplesimon]

1. Most likely true

Both my parents worked full time. When our parents were not home, or I had not finished the school day, it was not unusual for me to watch a few young ladies crawl out on a balcony outside an upstairs window to escape. I never told. My father would have beaten them within a inch of life. Moral decisions at 12 years old is flawed.

[d_r]

2. I'm sorry, I don't think

I understand what you are saying, could you add a bit more detail? thanks

[Takket]

4. escape who? your brother?

[saidsimplesimon]

6. escape my recognition as the baby sitter in charge

and the wrath of my father. It's a long story. My regrets that the remark was opaque.

[lapfog_1]

3. not too many high school kids would pimp out their sisters

so this story might actually have been some wishful thinking or cruel "slut shaming" by the basketball team.

Could it happen... yes.. in the pages of Penthouse Letters.

Just my opinion, of course.

[Solly Mack]

5. K&R

[bettyellen]

7. I remember my cousin recounting a party where a passed out woman "pulled a train" and

This was in front of parents (he rightfully guessed they'd have no idea what he was saying). I asked how she was responsible if she was passed out. He explained to me it was becasue she dated the biggest sleazy asshole in the world- who was his friend, and was there. They raped her and thought it was okay because one of them tainted her already. He joked about it at a holiday dinner with his mom and aunt at the table. He seemed surprised no one was amused. He’d always been an asshole, but he really crossed a line that day.
My cousin later joined the NYPD. At his wedding all his friends joked about what a moron his new wife was.

[milestogo]

8. Sounds awful.

I've occasionally watched the show "my 600lb life". Often the overweight person has suffered some kind of psychological trauma at an early age. In once case a woman said she agreed to have sex with her boyfriend on his or her 16th birthday. After they had sex, 6 of his friends suddenly appeared and they took turns raping her. Her boyfriend did not protect her.

Gang raped at 16, she ate her way to 600lbs. I can't even imagine what she went through. One night really can wreck your life.

[bettyellen]

10. Oh jeeze, all it takes is one sociopath who pressures his synchophant friends.

After that every time he brought around a new girl. At some point I’d tell them I know you’re new and you’re wondering if he’s a good guy. He is not. You should cut and run. I got sick of him using his family for credibility.
He, his sister and his mother- all sociopaths. Good riddance.

[WhiskeyGrinder]

9. Revisiting the stories I heard as a teenager has made me realize I probably didn't know the full

story.

[malaise]

11. I have long believed that socialization plays a major role and many parents

and educators perpetuate some of the worst attitudes about male and female behavior.
I won't even mention the religious institutions and their backward misogynist crap.

[milestogo]

12. And its clear that proper socialization needs to start before children are sexually mature.

[malaise]

13. Children live what they learn is not a cliche

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