Trump's Completely Batshit and Evil Statement About Saudi Arabia and the Murder of Jamal Khashoggi

[muriel_volestrangler]

This will be the best analysis of Trump's statement you will get. Because it comes from The Rude Pundit.

The White House released a statement today that is the rhetorical equivalent of President Donald Trump performing analingus on Saudi Arabia's Crown Prince (seriously, fuck that title) Mohammad bin Salman while bin Salman jacks off on Stephen Miller's bald head. Essentially, Trump is telling the world that Saudi Arabia and bin Salman have bought their way out of any culpability. And he's telling the intelligence agencies of the United States that they can go fuck themselves with their assessments.

It's an honestly stunning document, one that actually seems as if Trump was involved in writing because of its psychotic combination of ignorance, blindness, and apathy, like a bunch of his tweets strung together. Also, it reads like fucking moron dictated it to Stephen Miller, who added his special sauce of dickishness.

For one, it's got sentences that end in exclamation points. Who the fuck does that in an official release about anything, let alone a murder? The thing is titled (or epigraphed - who can tell?), no shit, "America First!" That's followed by the idiot bray of "The world is a very dangerous place!" Thanks for that update.

Trump starts by saying that Iran is the worst of the worst of the worstest worsts that every worsted worstness. It's a paragraph filled with easily proven lies, like "the Iranians have killed many Americans." No, they haven't. And then Trump goes on about how Saudi Arabia is a peace-loving nation that just wants to end the war in Yemen if only those mean Iranians would let it happen: "Saudi Arabia would gladly withdraw from Yemen if the Iranians would agree to leave." The Iranian military is not in Yemen. There is some support of the Houthi rebels. But when the Houthis wanted to calm shit down, Saudi Arabia responded by bombing the fuck out of them some more with U.S.-made weapons, which they are gonna need to buy more of from us.
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http://rudepundit.blogspot.com/2018/11/trumps-completely-batshit-statement.html

[vlyons]

1. State Dept professionals

must be lined up at the bathroom, waiting to go in and throw up their last meal.

[muriel_volestrangler]

4. Depends of which professionals - some may have invented the Saudi cover stories

Forgive the gallows humor, but we're in the 912th day of Bone Saw Week, and things are starting to get surreal. Middle East Eye is reporting that Secretary of State Mike Pompeo colluded with the Saudi government to cover up Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman's involvement in journalist Jamal Khashoggi's murder in the Saudi consulate. Middle East Eye, a paper aligned closely with the Turkish government, reports,

Saudi Arabia's king and crown prince are shielding themselves from the Jamal Khashoggi murder scandal by using a roadmap drawn up by the US secretary of state, a senior Saudi source has told Middle East Eye.

Mike Pompeo delivered the plan in person during a meeting with Saudi King Salman and his son, Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman, last month in Riyadh, said the source, who is familiar with Pompeo's talks with the Saudi leaders.

The plan includes an option to pin the Saudi journalist's murder on an innocent member of the ruling al-Saud family in order to insulate those at the very top, the source told MEE.

That person has not yet been chosen, the source said, and Saudi leaders are reserving the use of that plan in case the pressure on bin Salman, also known as MBS, becomes too much.

Pompeo went to KSA on October 16 to suggest a cover story? After which the US government spent an entire month stalling for time to allow the "investigation" to take place? Meanwhile, they knew from the jump that this was a hit ordered by Jared Kushner's BFF, and they were waiting for the cover-up to come together?
...
Mike Pompeo vigorously denies MEE's allegations but ABC's reporting confirms that the US government knows damn well who ordered the assassination.

[A] State Department official who has seen a version of the CIA's assessment on the murder of Saudi journalist Jamal Khashoggi told ABC News it's "blindingly obvious" that the crown prince, known as MBS, ordered Khashoggi's death.

"The idea that it goes all the way to the top is blindingly obvious," said the State Department official, speaking on the condition of anonymity.

"There's overwhelming consensus that the leadership is involved -- no one is debating it within the government," the official said. While saying no doubts are expressed in the report, the official acknowledged that the words "probably" and "likely" are used when attributing the death to the crown prince. The source noted that CIA analysis reports rarely include explicit conclusions.

https://www.wonkette.com/arms-sales-are-temporary-but-bone-saw-week-is-forever

[Autumn]

2. Where does he get that shit he spews out of his mouth?

[superpatriotman]

3. Bolt-on was involved in at least the first paragraph

Spoiling for a fight with Iran