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Thu Aug 23, 2012, 02:01 PM

Pat Robertson: “Sometimes Hurricanes Are Temperature Exchanges Across Hemispheres”

Speaking on the 700 Club Thursday, Pat Robertson decided to educate his audience on climate and the causes of hurricanes.

“Sometimes, as is the case with hurricane Isaac, hurricanes are caused by intense low pressure areas over warm water in the tropics and not as punishment for sodomy" said Robertson. "Water vapor releases the latent heat of condensation, simultaneously cooling the ocean water and building up heat in the atmosphere creating low pressure. The changes in temperature and pressure create wind that spirals ever more strongly until thunderstorms are created over a large area. This cycle continues and the winds evaporate even more water from the ocean, spiraling until an eyewall is generated at the center. If the conditions are right, the storm will move toward the poles and transfer the equatorial heat…Mostly it’s gays though.”

Sharing the stage with Mr. Robertson was faith healer Benny Hinn, who was happy to showcase his vast scientific knowledge.

“You know Pat,” said Mr. Hinn, having minutes earlier made an impassioned plea for money to raise the dead, “The same can be said for earthquakes. Most people don’t realize that the earth’s lithosphere is made up of tectonic plates that are also experiencing heat exchanges, albeit at a much slower rate than at the surface. Subduction carries plates into the mantle which is replaced equally by new oceanic crust along divergent margins. The intensity felt on the surface is a matter of many factors, such as distance from the fault, dept of the plate movement, and it’s all laid out in the properties of kinematics – Other times it’s secular humanists, of course.”

“That makes perfect sense, Benny,” said Robertson.

67 replies, 16518 views

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Arrow 67 replies Author Time Post
Reply Pat Robertson: “Sometimes Hurricanes Are Temperature Exchanges Across Hemispheres” (Original post)
20score Aug 2012 OP
southernyankeebelle Aug 2012 #1
cdb120 Aug 2012 #2
phantom power Aug 2012 #3
fleur-de-lisa Aug 2012 #4
sarcasmo Aug 2012 #65
Laf.La.Dem. Aug 2012 #5
HockeyMom Aug 2012 #6
Hugabear Aug 2012 #7
phantom power Aug 2012 #8
LiberalAndProud Aug 2012 #9
1-Old-Man Aug 2012 #10
Art_from_Ark Aug 2012 #54
phantom power Aug 2012 #11
20score Aug 2012 #12
yellowcanine Aug 2012 #13
sharp_stick Aug 2012 #15
yellowcanine Aug 2012 #17
heaven05 Aug 2012 #24
punkin87 Aug 2012 #14
ananda Aug 2012 #16
suede1 Aug 2012 #18
Zoeisright Aug 2012 #19
nolabear Aug 2012 #20
Spirochete Aug 2012 #21
heaven05 Aug 2012 #22
Fumesucker Aug 2012 #23
HappyMe Aug 2012 #25
Warpy Aug 2012 #26
LadyHawkAZ Aug 2012 #27
20score Aug 2012 #31
LadyHawkAZ Aug 2012 #42
liberalmuse Aug 2012 #28
panader0 Aug 2012 #32
20score Aug 2012 #37
niyad Aug 2012 #45
20score Aug 2012 #47
markpkessinger Aug 2012 #29
pnwmom Aug 2012 #30
20score Aug 2012 #48
Blue State Bandit Aug 2012 #33
niyad Aug 2012 #46
Initech Aug 2012 #34
PD Turk Aug 2012 #35
20score Aug 2012 #50
nadinbrzezinski Aug 2012 #36
garybeck Aug 2012 #38
20score Aug 2012 #40
petronius Aug 2012 #43
20score Aug 2012 #62
NutmegYankee Aug 2012 #39
RainDog Aug 2012 #41
20score Aug 2012 #55
Aerows Aug 2012 #44
leeroysphitz Aug 2012 #49
RKP5637 Aug 2012 #51
turtlerescue1 Aug 2012 #52
Raine Aug 2012 #53
Alduin Aug 2012 #56
20score Aug 2012 #57
tjwash Aug 2012 #58
punkin87 Aug 2012 #63
Systematic Chaos Aug 2012 #59
rasputin1952 Aug 2012 #60
Hugabear Aug 2012 #61
DawgHouse Aug 2012 #64
The Doctor. Aug 2012 #66
libodem Dec 2012 #67

Response to 20score (Original post)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 02:02 PM

1. Here I thought god was sending them a warning to stop their lying.

 

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Response to 20score (Original post)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 02:02 PM

2. LOL!! n/c

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Response to 20score (Original post)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 02:03 PM

3. Good to know...


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Response to 20score (Original post)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 02:04 PM

4. "Mostly it's gays though" . . .

Precious!

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Response to fleur-de-lisa (Reply #4)

Fri Aug 24, 2012, 01:39 PM

65. +1

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Response to 20score (Original post)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 02:05 PM

5. You can sure learn a lot from the 700 club

oops - I mean unlearn a lot

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Response to 20score (Original post)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 02:05 PM

6. If it was the DEMOCRAT Convention,

he would be saying God was punishing them! Republicans, Party of God, it is just WEATHER. ROFL

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Response to 20score (Original post)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 02:08 PM

7. "Most people don't realize..."

Actually most people DO know what causes earthquakes, even if it's only a rudimentary knowledge.

Unless you're talking about your own congregations that you've managed to brainwash with your "it's the gays" bullshit.

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Response to 20score (Original post)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 02:09 PM

8. science isn't a model to these people, it's just word salad

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Response to 20score (Original post)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 02:10 PM

9. Poe's law will have someone believe they really said this.

I am aware, however, that neither Robertson nor Hinn are acquainted with science to the degree necessary to have actually say this.

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Response to 20score (Original post)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 02:12 PM

10. I recall one Hurricane that has formed in the southern hemisphere and none that have crossed north

As far as I know no Hurricane has ever crossed the Equator, they all exist from beginning until end in the Northern Hemisphere. Could be wrong, but I don't think so.

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Response to 1-Old-Man (Reply #10)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 08:07 PM

54. In Australia, hurricanes are called "cyclones"

There are a few that occur in the Southern Hemisphere http://mpittweather.com/southemp.htm

including this devastating one that hit Australia in February of last year:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-pacific-12342031

But hurricanes/typhoons/cyclones do tend to stay completely in either the Northern Hemisphere or the Southern Hemisphere.

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Response to 20score (Original post)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 02:15 PM

11. is there a link?

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Response to phantom power (Reply #11)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 02:17 PM

12. ...

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Response to 20score (Original post)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 02:21 PM

13. How is Benny Hinn not in jail for fraud and tax evasion?

Benny's jet


and his Malibu mansion

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Response to yellowcanine (Reply #13)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 02:52 PM

15. That's how Jeebus

want's his preachers to live

Creflo Dollar

http://www.bing.com/maps/default.aspx?v=2&cp=33.502098~-84.554881&sty=o&lvl=2&tilt=-90&dir=0&alt=-1000&scene=27139261&encType=1

Pastor Ben Gibert



And of course the humble abode of Bishop Eddie Long



This bunch of criminal fuckwads should all be in jail.

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Response to sharp_stick (Reply #15)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 03:14 PM

17. Ken Copeland's 6 million dollar "house" that "Jesus gave him."

Jesus didn't need a big house like that so why not?

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Response to yellowcanine (Reply #13)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 04:38 PM

24. ashamed

 

they should be ashamed of themselves, Jesus is of them. All these huge mansions, I had no idea and bet your bottom dollar people are starving and they are living high on the hog. If there is a hell, they, all these people in all these photos are going

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Response to 20score (Original post)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 02:23 PM

14. Rec's!!! LOL!

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Response to 20score (Original post)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 02:53 PM

16. Hardyhar.

My amusement meter just shifted to 100%.

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Response to 20score (Original post)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 04:09 PM

18. lol! Vast scientific knowledge! Yep!

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Response to 20score (Original post)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 04:26 PM

19. I hate that old fart.

I'm amazed his head doesn't spin around 360 degrees. He's a fucking loon.

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Response to 20score (Original post)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 04:26 PM

20. LOL!! Yep, sounds just like 'em.

If I've heard heard Benny Hinn refer to tectonic plates and kinematics once I've heard it a thousand times.

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Response to 20score (Original post)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 04:30 PM

21. Between him and Akin

these guys are real whiz kids at science. No wonder they don't really believe in it...

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Response to 20score (Original post)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 04:33 PM

22. two more

 

two more science majors. what a joke these "christians" are.

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Response to 20score (Original post)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 04:36 PM

23. Damn, another exploded snarkometer to add to my collection.. after I put out the fire..n/t

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Response to 20score (Original post)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 04:39 PM

25. He's blinding them with science!

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Response to 20score (Original post)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 04:45 PM

26. Ah, the ignoranus (not a typo) echo chamber

where men of towering ignorance attempt to define a reality they can all live with because the real thing makes their brains hurt.

The problem with that is the amount of cognitive dissonance that grows and grows whenever factual reality intrudes and contradicts their pat alternative worlds.

Some of them end up going postal. More will simply withdraw into quiet, seething rage. A very few of them will wake up and realize these oafs have been lying to them for years.

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Response to 20score (Original post)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 04:50 PM

27. Onion? Satire?

Waaaaaay too educated for Robertson.

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Response to LadyHawkAZ (Reply #27)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 04:56 PM

31. Nope, mine.

So, thanks!

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Response to 20score (Reply #31)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 05:37 PM

42. Heh

I don't think saying "Gee, you're much smarter and more informed than Pat Robertson!" is a compliment worthy of thanks, but you're welcome anyway. It was very funny.

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Response to 20score (Original post)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 04:51 PM

28. Pat Robertson, you lying, hypocritical piece of shit.

This is from The Onion, right?

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Response to liberalmuse (Reply #28)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 04:57 PM

32. With no link I assume this to be the work of 20score.......

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Response to panader0 (Reply #32)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 05:11 PM

37. You assumed correctly.

Used to write satire on DU a lot more ofter a few years ago, but I've had a work schedule that damned near killed me.

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Response to 20score (Reply #37)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 05:57 PM

45. your satire has been missed. glad you had time to do this one, which was just beggiing for it.

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Response to niyad (Reply #45)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 06:12 PM

47. Thank you !!

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Response to 20score (Original post)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 04:52 PM

29. It's only God's wrath when . . .

. . . a city in the path of a hurricane is hosting a Democratic convention!

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Response to 20score (Original post)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 04:54 PM

30. This isn't an Onion piece?

Whoever wrote it, LOL.

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Response to pnwmom (Reply #30)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 06:59 PM

48. Thank you!

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Response to 20score (Original post)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 04:58 PM

33. The Onion strikes again...

DOH!

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Response to Blue State Bandit (Reply #33)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 05:58 PM

46. no, it is an original of the OP

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Response to 20score (Original post)


Response to 20score (Original post)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 05:03 PM

35. This is great

You should write for The Onion

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Response to PD Turk (Reply #35)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 07:26 PM

50. Thank you, PD Turk!

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Response to 20score (Original post)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 05:06 PM

36. Self delete

 



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Response to 20score (Original post)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 05:28 PM

38. is this satire ?

if it's true I'd like to spread it around

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Response to garybeck (Reply #38)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 05:34 PM

40. Satire.

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Response to 20score (Reply #40)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 05:39 PM

43. Well done!

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Response to petronius (Reply #43)

Fri Aug 24, 2012, 12:48 PM

62. Thanks!

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Response to 20score (Original post)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 05:31 PM

39. Ah. I was thinking that was a lot of big words for Robertson to say... nt

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Response to 20score (Original post)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 05:36 PM

41. LOL. Great post!! n/t

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Response to RainDog (Reply #41)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 09:20 PM

55. Thank you!

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Response to 20score (Original post)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 05:42 PM

44. "The gay prostitutes that are set to make a lot of money in Tampa"

 

are really to blame for this.

If it weren't for the gay prostitutes tempting our fine men to do evil, Isaac wouldn't be a problem." Robertson said.

http://www.theonion.com/video/tampa-bay-gay-prostitutes-gearing-up-for-flood-of,29263/

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Response to 20score (Original post)


Response to 20score (Original post)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 07:39 PM

51. It's pretty obvious these people don't know how to pray and god hates them, otherwise they

could just heal the temperature imbalances with a little hand waving, bible thumping and some intense prayer sessions.

Oops, I got that all wrong, SEND MORE MONEY, WE NEED MORE MONEY! ... and no taxes on our profits!

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Response to 20score (Original post)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 07:45 PM

52. And that is why I'm an ELCA Lutheran!

Science and Geography and Meteorolgy/Weather and Astronomy and Physical Science and more likely in the case of Mr. Akin Biology; Anatomy and Physiology classes. Sigh.

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Response to 20score (Original post)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 07:50 PM

53. Uh NO, it's proof that God doesn't like Rethugs

he threatened them with a hurrican 4 years ago. Hey Rethugs you better get the message ... GOD has it in for you and sees you as evil, hurricanes are Devine Retribution for your hatefullness!

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Response to 20score (Original post)

Thu Aug 23, 2012, 10:18 PM

56. Obviously this isn't real.

 

Pat Robertson and Benny Hinn would never say something like this.

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Response to 20score (Original post)

Fri Aug 24, 2012, 09:24 AM

57. Thanks much people!

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Response to 20score (Original post)

Fri Aug 24, 2012, 09:30 AM

58. Yes...but in the case of a legitimate hurricane, the earth actually has ways of shutting it down

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Response to tjwash (Reply #58)

Fri Aug 24, 2012, 01:13 PM

63. Thank God!

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Response to 20score (Original post)

Fri Aug 24, 2012, 09:39 AM

59. And sometimes a thought is a temperature exchange between Robertson's rectum and forehead.

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Response to 20score (Original post)

Fri Aug 24, 2012, 10:06 AM

60. Prayer can backfire too...

Just ask Rick Perry...praying for rain in TX, the state bursts into flame!

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Response to 20score (Original post)

Fri Aug 24, 2012, 10:12 AM

61. Let's see what Ancient Alien guy has to say

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Response to 20score (Original post)

Fri Aug 24, 2012, 01:16 PM

64. You're hilarious!

Serious LOL, here!

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Response to 20score (Original post)

Fri Aug 24, 2012, 02:23 PM

66. Benny Hinn was the tell.

 

Good piece.

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Response to 20score (Original post)

Wed Dec 19, 2012, 08:58 PM

67. kick

Gem.

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