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20score

(4,769 posts)
Thu Aug 23, 2012, 03:01 PM Aug 2012

Pat Robertson: “Sometimes Hurricanes Are Temperature Exchanges Across Hemispheres”

Speaking on the 700 Club Thursday, Pat Robertson decided to educate his audience on climate and the causes of hurricanes.

“Sometimes, as is the case with hurricane Isaac, hurricanes are caused by intense low pressure areas over warm water in the tropics and not as punishment for sodomy" said Robertson. "Water vapor releases the latent heat of condensation, simultaneously cooling the ocean water and building up heat in the atmosphere creating low pressure. The changes in temperature and pressure create wind that spirals ever more strongly until thunderstorms are created over a large area. This cycle continues and the winds evaporate even more water from the ocean, spiraling until an eyewall is generated at the center. If the conditions are right, the storm will move toward the poles and transfer the equatorial heat…Mostly it’s gays though.”

Sharing the stage with Mr. Robertson was faith healer Benny Hinn, who was happy to showcase his vast scientific knowledge.

“You know Pat,” said Mr. Hinn, having minutes earlier made an impassioned plea for money to raise the dead, “The same can be said for earthquakes. Most people don’t realize that the earth’s lithosphere is made up of tectonic plates that are also experiencing heat exchanges, albeit at a much slower rate than at the surface. Subduction carries plates into the mantle which is replaced equally by new oceanic crust along divergent margins. The intensity felt on the surface is a matter of many factors, such as distance from the fault, dept of the plate movement, and it’s all laid out in the properties of kinematics – Other times it’s secular humanists, of course.”

“That makes perfect sense, Benny,” said Robertson.

67 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
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Pat Robertson: “Sometimes Hurricanes Are Temperature Exchanges Across Hemispheres” (Original Post) 20score Aug 2012 OP
Here I thought god was sending them a warning to stop their lying. southernyankeebelle Aug 2012 #1
LOL!! n/c cdb120 Aug 2012 #2
Good to know... phantom power Aug 2012 #3
"Mostly it's gays though" . . . fleur-de-lisa Aug 2012 #4
+1 sarcasmo Aug 2012 #65
You can sure learn a lot from the 700 club Laf.La.Dem. Aug 2012 #5
If it was the DEMOCRAT Convention, HockeyMom Aug 2012 #6
"Most people don't realize..." Hugabear Aug 2012 #7
science isn't a model to these people, it's just word salad phantom power Aug 2012 #8
Poe's law will have someone believe they really said this. LiberalAndProud Aug 2012 #9
I recall one Hurricane that has formed in the southern hemisphere and none that have crossed north 1-Old-Man Aug 2012 #10
In Australia, hurricanes are called "cyclones" Art_from_Ark Aug 2012 #54
is there a link? phantom power Aug 2012 #11
... 20score Aug 2012 #12
How is Benny Hinn not in jail for fraud and tax evasion? yellowcanine Aug 2012 #13
That's how Jeebus sharp_stick Aug 2012 #15
Ken Copeland's 6 million dollar "house" that "Jesus gave him." yellowcanine Aug 2012 #17
ashamed heaven05 Aug 2012 #24
Rec's!!! LOL! punkin87 Aug 2012 #14
Hardyhar. ananda Aug 2012 #16
lol! Vast scientific knowledge! Yep! suede1 Aug 2012 #18
I hate that old fart. Zoeisright Aug 2012 #19
LOL!! Yep, sounds just like 'em. nolabear Aug 2012 #20
Between him and Akin Spirochete Aug 2012 #21
two more heaven05 Aug 2012 #22
Damn, another exploded snarkometer to add to my collection.. after I put out the fire..n/t Fumesucker Aug 2012 #23
He's blinding them with science! HappyMe Aug 2012 #25
Ah, the ignoranus (not a typo) echo chamber Warpy Aug 2012 #26
Onion? Satire? LadyHawkAZ Aug 2012 #27
Nope, mine. 20score Aug 2012 #31
Heh LadyHawkAZ Aug 2012 #42
Pat Robertson, you lying, hypocritical piece of shit. liberalmuse Aug 2012 #28
With no link I assume this to be the work of 20score....... panader0 Aug 2012 #32
You assumed correctly. 20score Aug 2012 #37
your satire has been missed. glad you had time to do this one, which was just beggiing for it. niyad Aug 2012 #45
Thank you !! 20score Aug 2012 #47
It's only God's wrath when . . . markpkessinger Aug 2012 #29
This isn't an Onion piece? pnwmom Aug 2012 #30
Thank you! 20score Aug 2012 #48
The Onion strikes again... Blue State Bandit Aug 2012 #33
no, it is an original of the OP niyad Aug 2012 #46
This message was self-deleted by its author Initech Aug 2012 #34
This is great PD Turk Aug 2012 #35
Thank you, PD Turk! 20score Aug 2012 #50
Self delete nadinbrzezinski Aug 2012 #36
is this satire ? garybeck Aug 2012 #38
Satire. 20score Aug 2012 #40
Well done! petronius Aug 2012 #43
Thanks! 20score Aug 2012 #62
Ah. I was thinking that was a lot of big words for Robertson to say... nt NutmegYankee Aug 2012 #39
LOL. Great post!! n/t RainDog Aug 2012 #41
Thank you! 20score Aug 2012 #55
"The gay prostitutes that are set to make a lot of money in Tampa" Aerows Aug 2012 #44
This message was self-deleted by its author leeroysphitz Aug 2012 #49
It's pretty obvious these people don't know how to pray and god hates them, otherwise they RKP5637 Aug 2012 #51
And that is why I'm an ELCA Lutheran! turtlerescue1 Aug 2012 #52
Uh NO, it's proof that God doesn't like Rethugs Raine Aug 2012 #53
Obviously this isn't real. Alduin Aug 2012 #56
Thanks much people! 20score Aug 2012 #57
Yes...but in the case of a legitimate hurricane, the earth actually has ways of shutting it down tjwash Aug 2012 #58
Thank God! punkin87 Aug 2012 #63
And sometimes a thought is a temperature exchange between Robertson's rectum and forehead. Systematic Chaos Aug 2012 #59
Prayer can backfire too... rasputin1952 Aug 2012 #60
Let's see what Ancient Alien guy has to say Hugabear Aug 2012 #61
You're hilarious! DawgHouse Aug 2012 #64
Benny Hinn was the tell. The Doctor. Aug 2012 #66
kick libodem Dec 2012 #67
 

HockeyMom

(14,337 posts)
6. If it was the DEMOCRAT Convention,
Thu Aug 23, 2012, 03:05 PM
Aug 2012

he would be saying God was punishing them! Republicans, Party of God, it is just WEATHER. ROFL

Hugabear

(10,340 posts)
7. "Most people don't realize..."
Thu Aug 23, 2012, 03:08 PM
Aug 2012

Actually most people DO know what causes earthquakes, even if it's only a rudimentary knowledge.

Unless you're talking about your own congregations that you've managed to brainwash with your "it's the gays" bullshit.

LiberalAndProud

(12,799 posts)
9. Poe's law will have someone believe they really said this.
Thu Aug 23, 2012, 03:10 PM
Aug 2012

I am aware, however, that neither Robertson nor Hinn are acquainted with science to the degree necessary to have actually say this.

1-Old-Man

(2,667 posts)
10. I recall one Hurricane that has formed in the southern hemisphere and none that have crossed north
Thu Aug 23, 2012, 03:12 PM
Aug 2012

As far as I know no Hurricane has ever crossed the Equator, they all exist from beginning until end in the Northern Hemisphere. Could be wrong, but I don't think so.

Art_from_Ark

(27,247 posts)
54. In Australia, hurricanes are called "cyclones"
Thu Aug 23, 2012, 09:07 PM
Aug 2012

There are a few that occur in the Southern Hemisphere http://mpittweather.com/southemp.htm

including this devastating one that hit Australia in February of last year:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-pacific-12342031

But hurricanes/typhoons/cyclones do tend to stay completely in either the Northern Hemisphere or the Southern Hemisphere.

yellowcanine

(35,694 posts)
17. Ken Copeland's 6 million dollar "house" that "Jesus gave him."
Thu Aug 23, 2012, 04:14 PM
Aug 2012

Jesus didn't need a big house like that so why not?

 

heaven05

(18,124 posts)
24. ashamed
Thu Aug 23, 2012, 05:38 PM
Aug 2012

they should be ashamed of themselves, Jesus is of them. All these huge mansions, I had no idea and bet your bottom dollar people are starving and they are living high on the hog. If there is a hell, they, all these people in all these photos are going

nolabear

(41,936 posts)
20. LOL!! Yep, sounds just like 'em.
Thu Aug 23, 2012, 05:26 PM
Aug 2012

If I've heard heard Benny Hinn refer to tectonic plates and kinematics once I've heard it a thousand times.

Spirochete

(5,264 posts)
21. Between him and Akin
Thu Aug 23, 2012, 05:30 PM
Aug 2012

these guys are real whiz kids at science. No wonder they don't really believe in it...

Warpy

(111,162 posts)
26. Ah, the ignoranus (not a typo) echo chamber
Thu Aug 23, 2012, 05:45 PM
Aug 2012

where men of towering ignorance attempt to define a reality they can all live with because the real thing makes their brains hurt.

The problem with that is the amount of cognitive dissonance that grows and grows whenever factual reality intrudes and contradicts their pat alternative worlds.

Some of them end up going postal. More will simply withdraw into quiet, seething rage. A very few of them will wake up and realize these oafs have been lying to them for years.

LadyHawkAZ

(6,199 posts)
42. Heh
Thu Aug 23, 2012, 06:37 PM
Aug 2012

I don't think saying "Gee, you're much smarter and more informed than Pat Robertson!" is a compliment worthy of thanks, but you're welcome anyway. It was very funny.

20score

(4,769 posts)
37. You assumed correctly.
Thu Aug 23, 2012, 06:11 PM
Aug 2012

Used to write satire on DU a lot more ofter a few years ago, but I've had a work schedule that damned near killed me.

niyad

(113,074 posts)
45. your satire has been missed. glad you had time to do this one, which was just beggiing for it.
Thu Aug 23, 2012, 06:57 PM
Aug 2012

markpkessinger

(8,392 posts)
29. It's only God's wrath when . . .
Thu Aug 23, 2012, 05:52 PM
Aug 2012

. . . a city in the path of a hurricane is hosting a Democratic convention!

Response to 20score (Original post)

 

Aerows

(39,961 posts)
44. "The gay prostitutes that are set to make a lot of money in Tampa"
Thu Aug 23, 2012, 06:42 PM
Aug 2012

are really to blame for this.

If it weren't for the gay prostitutes tempting our fine men to do evil, Isaac wouldn't be a problem." Robertson said.

http://www.theonion.com/video/tampa-bay-gay-prostitutes-gearing-up-for-flood-of,29263/

Response to 20score (Original post)

RKP5637

(67,088 posts)
51. It's pretty obvious these people don't know how to pray and god hates them, otherwise they
Thu Aug 23, 2012, 08:39 PM
Aug 2012

could just heal the temperature imbalances with a little hand waving, bible thumping and some intense prayer sessions.

Oops, I got that all wrong, SEND MORE MONEY, WE NEED MORE MONEY! ... and no taxes on our profits!

turtlerescue1

(1,013 posts)
52. And that is why I'm an ELCA Lutheran!
Thu Aug 23, 2012, 08:45 PM
Aug 2012

Science and Geography and Meteorolgy/Weather and Astronomy and Physical Science and more likely in the case of Mr. Akin Biology; Anatomy and Physiology classes. Sigh.

Raine

(30,540 posts)
53. Uh NO, it's proof that God doesn't like Rethugs
Thu Aug 23, 2012, 08:50 PM
Aug 2012

he threatened them with a hurrican 4 years ago. Hey Rethugs you better get the message ... GOD has it in for you and sees you as evil, hurricanes are Devine Retribution for your hatefullness!

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