Tucson Shooting: Couple who escaped the bullets can't escape the horrible memories of that day

[ellisonz]

The year following the Tucson-area shooting hasn't been easy for the Salzgebers, for whom the nightmare is all too fresh. Tom Tingle/The Arizona Republic

By Dennis Wagner - Jan. 3, 2012 09:52 PM
The Republic | azcentral.com

Roger Salzgeber was not hit by bullets in the mass murder near Tucson a year ago, but he was wounded nevertheless.

"Some days are better than others," says the 63-year-old retiree, who was among those who held down the shooter until police arrived. "I decided to just move on as best I can. But it's not going well. This is just really, really emotional for me."

Salzgeber says he is haunted by anxiety, anger and cynicism since he and his wife, Faith, survived the Jan. 8 attack outside a supermarket. Six people were killed and 13 wounded at a meet-and-greet gathering for U.S. Rep. Gabrielle Giffords, D-Ariz., who is still recovering from brain injuries caused by a 9mm slug.

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When the shooting started that Saturday morning, the Salzgebers were fourth and fifth in line. They dove to the ground and somehow avoided being shot. Twelve months later, they cannot escape memories of the mayhem or a sense of survivor incredulity.

Read more: http://www.azcentral.com/12news/news/articles/2011/12/14/20111214tucson-shootings-couple-who-escaped-bullets-cant-escape-horrible-memories.html#ixzz1iXAk0jS0

(Note to Mods: I think the upcoming 1 year mark from the shooting qualifies as "really big news." )

There are some pretty bad accounts of several Republican Senators behavior in regards to listening to them on gun control.

[hlthe2b]

1. Somehow it seems cruel to suggest they were "lucky"

Of course they were "fortunate" not to be killed or physically injured, but how horrible must be the mental turmoil. I wish them peace and comfort.

[ellisonz]

2. Survivors guilt. - Mr. Salzberger is taking it really roughly.

"Roger says his wife helps him through these rough spots, whispering to soothe frustrations, "She has this mantra: 'Act like Gabby would want you to act,' " he says. "It helps."

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Survivors_guilt#Survivor_syndrome i.e. PTSD.

[csziggy]

5. Here is what is really cruel - to get assistance with therapy

>>Neither of them has been to counseling. In the aftermath of the shooting, Roger says, gunshot victims got automatic psychological treatment along with their medical care. Those who were not wounded received offers of psychological help, but application papers required them to write about the traumatizing event.

>>"I got started on it. I just gave up," he says. "Even though they tell you that you can get this care, it's somewhat difficult to receive ... because of the hoops you've got to go through."

Read more: http://www.azcentral.com/12news/news/articles/2011/12/14/20111214tucson-shootings-couple-who-escaped-bullets-cant-escape-horrible-memories.html#ixzz1iXnoTzXQ

That seems a ridiculous requirement that would prevent a lot of people who have suffered a traumatic event from getting help.

[ellisonz]

6. Agreed.

Sometimes you just have to wonder what people are thinking when they make a decision such as that; I wonder if his wife couldn't fill out the application for him.

[csziggy]

7. But she was also affected by the incident

And almost certainly has PTSD too.

A more useful thing to ask people applying for this kind of help would to ask how their lives have been affected. They should be able to write about that without adding to the trauma. That would also help winnow the people who need the most help from those who are only marginally affected.

[ellisonz]

8. She seemed less affected from the article.

At least capable of filling out the form for him - I mean she's family.

"A more useful thing to ask people applying for this kind of help would to ask how their lives have been affected."

[pinboy3niner]

15. If the caregiver is local, they should be able to do an oral intake

There is no reason why the paperwork should be an obstacle to treatment.

[ellisonz]

16. Agreed.

I think perhaps there's an issue of will on both their parts - he understandably doesn't want to come to terms with what happened that day and she doesn't want to push him too hard. Sad all around. I'm still shaken up by it; I can't imagine the pain those who were there that day went through, and continue to go through; we all have to get better. So much suffering in the world...

[pinboy3niner]

17. As a trauma survivor, I can understand that

I buried my own trauma for 16 years. I walked by a Vet Center during that time--but couldn't make myself walk in.

It may be less a problem of will than a problem of denial.

[ellisonz]

18. Glad to have you here!

My Grandparents are Holocaust Survivors and as far as I can tell neither has ever come to terms with what happened...just sort of buried it; they refuse to talk about any personal specifics of the traumatic events. It's made for some interesting conversations. I think at a certain point easing up on the sort of grip trauma can have at you becomes necessary to negotiate with the world. They've been very lucky and I can tell my grandfather has leaned very heavily on my grandmother for the sort of support one needs to even begin to heal, a term which I use very loosely.

There's no running from it forever.

[pinboy3niner]

19. We can run from it...but it's always there

We bury it because the emotional pain is too much to bear. It can take time to put experience into a perspective we can deal with. And traumatic experience can be extremely challenging to our world view.

I'm glad your grandparents survived. They may have come to terms with their experience in their own way, having each other. It may not be the clinical model, but whatever measure of peace they've been able to find, more power to them!

[ellisonz]

3. Kick for Remembrance.

[malaise]

4. Kick

and Rec

[ellisonz]

11. Thank you.

[hfojvt]

9. Salt-givers

I wonder where their ancestry is from. I have Salzgebers in my family tree.

No doubt that would be a very traumatic event for all involved.

[ellisonz]

10. According to...

...Wikipedia Salzgeber is German-Swiss, so Bavaria and most likely Southeastern Bavaria. I remember reading something about there being lots of salt mines near Berchtesgaden.

Seems like a somewhat common name: http://www.ancestry.com/name-origin?surname=salzgeber

[Missy Vixen]

12. Kick and recommend

All they did was go to the grocery store to talk with their Congresswoman.

[pinboy3niner]

13. K&R

[ellisonz]

14. Kick

Because of this thread: http://www.democraticunderground.com/1002150502