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Wed Apr 17, 2019, 05:07 PM

Here's a sneak preview of Rudy's rebuttal

At 2.54am on Tuesday, Rudy Giuliani texted Politicoís Darren Samuelsohn that the presidentís ďcounter reportĒ will come out at the same time as the redacted Mueller report and that it will be 34 or 35 pages. Originally, Rudy G had promised to deliver 140 pages of delicious, bodice-ripping, lib-owning content, but as this writer can tell you, there are only so many gifs, emojis and Venn diagrams you can put in a piece of writing before you start to look like you're just trying to fill the pages.

Speculation is wild about what will be in the Rudy Rebuttal but luckily for me, Julian Assange sent me an early copy on the condition that I publish it immediately (because thatís what you do when you're totally not a cut-out of the Russian government at all.)

Part one of the Rudy Rebuttal is the origin story of how the Rudy Rebuttal came to pass in the first place. Confusingly, part one also includes copies of Rudyís first three pre-nuptials. There is some truly breathtaking prose in part one and if you donít have a pet pig, the cut-out on page seven is basically chicken soup for the conservative soul.

Part two of the Rudy Rebuttal is a wide-ranging defense of all of Trumpís sketchiest stuff, including several porn-star payoffs not previously known about. It also includes an early autobiographical poem written by a young Donald J Trump in iambic pentameter. But by far the most illuminating section is the Snapchat story of Tiffany playing golf at Trump National in Florida.

Part five of the Rudy Rebuttal is a copy of Rudyís online dating profile for Christian singles. It includes a long second about his personal turn-offs, which include not being at least tangentially related to him.


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Reply Here's a sneak preview of Rudy's rebuttal (Original post)
pscot Apr 2019 OP
rzemanfl Apr 2019 #1

Response to pscot (Original post)

Wed Apr 17, 2019, 05:15 PM

1. You mean "orange story" right? n/t

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