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Sat Oct 19, 2019, 10:51 PM

Breaking: New site for 2020 G-7 summit announced

WASHINGTON (Spurious News Network) -- After days of debate and an irate retraction by President Trump, the site of the 2020 meeting of the leaders of the world's seven most powerful nations, also known as the Group of Seven or G-7, has been released by the White House Office of Protocol.

"It's going to be held in the lunchroom at the United States Penitentiary, Terre Haute, Indiana," said a spokesperson who wishes to remain anonymous for his or her own safety.

When asked why they would choose to hold an important meeting at a prison, the spokesperson shrugged the spokesperson's shoulders. "President Trump really, really wanted to attend the G-7 Summit next year...and that's where he's gonna be. So, why not?"

The rest of the leaders of the Group of Seven have already expressed their approval. "Of course we'll all be there," German chancellor Angela Merkel said. "There are a few things we've always wanted to say to the sorry son of a bitch, and he'll need to be in a cage when we do."

Canadian prime minister Justin Trudeau points out a few small logistical problems. "Terre Haute doesn't have any fine hotels. They don't really need them. I've talked to my friends at Bombardier, and they're willing to loan us a few jets to fly the attendees from Chicago or Indianapolis to the prison. Everything will be great."

In case Mr. Trump is locked up in a different prison when next year's G-7 Summit rolls around, the leaders of the other six members of the Group of Seven have stated their willingness to sleep just about anywhere so long as they get their five minutes alone with Mr. Trump. "We're drawing the line at sleeping in vans down by the river," said Italian prime minister Giuseppe Conte, "but in America you have 'bed and breakfast inns' and they sound really nice."

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Arrow 9 replies Author Time Post
Reply Breaking: New site for 2020 G-7 summit announced (Original post)
jmowreader Oct 2019 OP
CaliforniaPeggy Oct 2019 #1
napi21 Oct 2019 #2
LiberalFighter Oct 2019 #3
Gothmog Oct 2019 #4
oasis Oct 2019 #5
spanone Oct 2019 #6
herding cats Oct 2019 #7
Takket Oct 2019 #8
soldierant Oct 2019 #9

Response to jmowreader (Original post)

Sat Oct 19, 2019, 11:01 PM

1. Spurious News Netword, indeed!

This is hilarious, worthy of The Onion.

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Response to jmowreader (Original post)

Sat Oct 19, 2019, 11:03 PM

2. Oh how I dream of reading this for REAL! nt

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Response to jmowreader (Original post)

Sat Oct 19, 2019, 11:04 PM

3. Posting to Facebook

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Response to jmowreader (Original post)

Sat Oct 19, 2019, 11:05 PM

4. It is hard to do satire in todays world

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Response to jmowreader (Original post)

Sat Oct 19, 2019, 11:19 PM

5. Loved it. thanks for the laugh.

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Response to jmowreader (Original post)

Sat Oct 19, 2019, 11:20 PM

6. K&R...👍🏼👍🏼👍🏼👍🏼👍🏼

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Response to jmowreader (Original post)

Sat Oct 19, 2019, 11:22 PM

7. 🤣😂🤣😂

Well played, dear friend... well played!

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Response to jmowreader (Original post)

Sat Oct 19, 2019, 11:22 PM

8. he'll host it at a mcdonalds and buy filet of fish for everyone....

and actually think he's impressed them all!

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Response to Takket (Reply #8)

Sun Oct 20, 2019, 12:44 AM

9. Oh, he will indeed make an impression

just not a good one.

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