So... I'm trying to get a good friend of mine to vote.

[Mother Of Four]

She's got to be the hardest challenge in this I've ever had. She doesn't complain about Obama, her and I share alot of views as well.

Here is her problem, she doesn't trust politicians at all. She is extreme in this, she thinks they are all rotten to the core and refuses to vote on principle. "I will NOT vote for the lesser of two bad choices, in the end they are all corrupt."

Her parents came to visit recently, they are in their 60's. I used that as an open door to have a conversation with them at the table. Surprisingly, even though her mother is a birther she stated she's abstaining this year from voting as well because "That Romney man is a snake, he's reptilian. I can't bring myself to vote for him."She went on for a bit, then said "He has dead eyes, that's all I can say." Her father stated he's voting for Obama on one issue alone: Social Security.

What I've tried:
Your vote is your voice, the only way we can stop the corruption is by using that voice.

Think of all the good, (she has older kiddos) like your kiddos still being able to get medical.

If you don't feel comfortable voting for a person, what about voting for an ideal? There are four supreme court justices in their 70's, which means a shift in the supreme court very soon. Do you want to risk that?

(Most recent)If you don't want to vote, I understand. But can you meet me halfway? If nothing else, please watch Michelle's speech I promise you honey, you'll fall in love with her. I'm not asking you to vote, just keep an open mind. This was yesterday, and she's coming over either tonight or tomorrow to watch Michelle. She won't watch the politicians themselves, but has nothing against the spouses.

Small important thing here: She and I are very close. She doesn't get offended in the least when I gently nudge her to vote, she smiles at me and shakes her head because she knows me well enough that I won't quit I love her to bits.

I know this seems like a ton of work for one vote, (Mom and Dad live in Ohio, so I can't get Dad to help me out) but I want her to get some good feelings back about this whole process. A vote is a voice, and too many people stay silent.

Thanks in advance for any ideas.

[orpupilofnature57]

1. Vote against what she doesn't want

more. Politicians after we vote for them, and they've allowed themselves to be castigated, exposed, scrutinized have the power to Ruin our lives, so on the issue of trust my advice would be don't, make them prove it.

[Mother Of Four]

10. I've talked to her about making them prove it...

She proverbially throws her hands in the air and says something to the effect of "Then they are already in office, they have what they want. What do they care?"

But thank you for the response, I appreciate it.

[Esse Quam Videri]

2. Maybe ask her to do it for you and your kids?

Do what Obama did and ask her for her vote. Tell her it is so important for you and your family that Obama be reelected. If she really could care less what will it hurt for her to help you out?

[Mother Of Four]

6. I don't thinks it's that she doesn't care...

She feels all politicians are the same, that her vote is only going to be a stamp of approval for "yet another backbiter."

[Love Bug]

3. Does she feel that way about local politicians?

Surely there must be local pols she might feel differently about. They are usually much more accessible so she can get to know them a bit more outside of the campaign slogans or ads. Or how about voting for referendums if she doesn't want to vote for people? She doesn't have to fill out all the boxes on the ballot.

You are right, though. A vote is a voice even if you only check off one box. Encourage her to start small and maybe eventually she'll get more involved.

It pains me to see women take this privilege so lightly.

[Mother Of Four]

7. Our local politicians are ..

Well for lack of a better word, useless. They want all the pomp and circumstance and then point fingers all over the place 'That's not my job' while going to dinners and parades and other crap. So locals are a bust. The referendums are a great idea though. Thanks

Edited for spelling, I got in a hurry :p

[carlotta]

4. I just converted a friend

I asked her on Wed. if she had watched Clinton's speech the night before. She said she wasn't going to watch any of the convention. She was spouting the same schtick--"they're all alike". "Obama has been a disappointment". "Both parties are the same." And, that she wasn't going to vote.

I told her that the parties are dramatically different in their plans and visions for this country and that there would be HUGE implications for her and her family. Under Romney, big cuts in education (she has a child in school), repealing Obamacare (they're self-insured), etc., etc.

I saw her yesterday and she told me that she did, after all, listen to Obama's speech and that he won her over...bigtime!

Now, she will be in that voting booth selecting Obama on the touchscreen. One friend down, several more to go.

[Mother Of Four]

8. I'm really hoping-

That watching Michelle will perk her interest in watching our President, it's hard to NOT want to see the man that could move a woman like that. She had a pretty darn powerful argument

[uppityperson]

5. She doesn't have to vote for everything, every race, every issue. Is there 1 thing that might move

her? I had a friend who was overwhelmed and distrustful and got him started voting for 1 issue.

I agree that politicians are corrupt, but they will continue to be more and more corrupt unless we try and stop them. My vote rarely counts for anything, but I have to try at least. She sounds the same way. Don't vote for a person, don't worry about all the races. Pick 1 issue and vote for who will help you the most. Good luck.

[Mother Of Four]

9. She's a Daddy's girl...

In all the best ways. I'm thinking that if I go for one issue I could go for the fact that Dad is really close to retirement, he's being a one issue voter himself for Social Security. Thanks

[southernyankeebelle]

11. Tell her if you love your parents and your future vote dem. It is imperative to vote.

She as well as her parents will lose the way of life. If she is able to get birth control that could be taken away for her and her own daughters someday. I hate voting myself. But at least go vote dem for a congressman or senator. She doesn't have to vote for president. She has no right to complain if she doesn't vote.

[shraby]

12. Tell her whether she votes or not, she will live by the laws they make...

so she might as well vote.

[chowder66]

13. Giving up her constitutional right to vote is silencing her voice and handing that off

to someone less informed who is all too willing to vote against their own interests and in turn the interests of the citizens of this country.

If she thinks there will ever be a perfect candidate or a government without a drop of corruption then she has it all wrong.
How the hell can any president get total agreement. I may like 8 ideas/solutions while the next person may like one. No politician will ever in the history of the world please everyone.

Her vote doesn't have to be about the lesser of two evils. Her vote can be an informed vote, as informed as she can make it.
If her cynicism is deep then she needs to fight against that and think about what may happen if Romney gets into office or if the President stays in office.

She needs to figure out what she truly stands for and then find out who is supporting those issues not just in her decision for President, but in her decision of a party and/or the people who support the same things. So maybe you can tell her that her vote is not just about supporting a candidate but about supporting the people of a candidate and the policies that they support.


What I don't get about people who say they are not going to vote because "All politicians are corrupt" (which by the way would be a hell of a thing to prove) or they hate "big government" or their "vote doesn't count" is that by NOT voting....how has that fixed anything? All that does is say "I don't support anything" or "I can't find any amount of issues that I can support anywhere so I'm giving up my right to vote" aka I support "not voting". That is one hell of a platform now isn't it?


People need to set aside the easy excuses and figure out what they do believe in and then support it. They should refuse to give up their constitutional right to vote or they need to admit that they just don't care enough.

[LWolf]

14. The hardest part about her argument is

that she is correct. I don't see any reason to trust politicians, and they are all corrupt to some degree. Trying to argue that they aren't is ineffective, to say the least.

As someone who often thinks the same, I'll tell you what doesn't work: the lesser evil argument is counter-productive with someone who wants to vote with integrity. Using the fear card automatically puts you on political "ignore." Treating an election like a sporting event doesn't work either; for some of us, winning an election is not "winning" unless we win the issues. IT'S NOT THE PERSON; IT'S THE ISSUES. Ganging up and/or bullying doesn't work. I've never yet given into the urge to flip a finger at a political bully and punish them by voting opposite to what they were pushing, but I've been tempted.

I wouldn't have shown up to watch Michelle's speech; those speeches aren't about specific changes on the issues. Since positions, record, and agenda on issues are the only thing that inspires or motivates my vote, most of the pro-candidate propaganda speeches just piss me off. If you think she's weak enough to be "inspired" by propaganda, though, go for it.

Here are a few more positive suggestions:

"Your vote is your voice. When you allow yourself to be silenced, you become part of the problem. If you can't, in good conscience, find anyone worth a vote on your ballot, write someone in. Nothing will change in the short term, but at least your voice is heard, and you haven't been silenced." This is similar to what you've already tried, with a little extra nuance.

"If everyone who didn't vote because there are no acceptable choices DID vote, substantive change could be achieved. Find others who have been disenfranchised and join together to make common cause and help your voices be heard at the polls."

"Be the change you want to see. That means taking an active role."

What is your real goal? To get her to vote, or to get her to vote the way you want? If you just want her to show up and vote, don't try to push a party or candidate; stick to civic responsibility and participation, and show her enough respect to make her own choice about WHO.

If the goal is just to get her to vote your way in one election, you've given her your reasons. Let her think about it and make an informed choice.

[athenasatanjesus]

15. Tell her that voter apathy favors the corrupt politicians.

Who would prefere most voters be apathetic,the politicians trying to help the voters,or the ones trying to exploit the voters?

[TheKentuckian]

16. I get where they are coming from but what has slipped of her radar is

that she is reacting to politicians falling down on the job by refusing to live up to her own part of the bargain which is participation. Minus her participation along with the tens of millions like her, what is the alternative outcome?
The truth is the idea that you'll participate only when the people running for office have earned your participation is maybe insane because from where would they come and what would be the incentive and gravity to create such conditions?

Withdrawing from the process means one becomes a non-factor. There are plenty that hate a third party voter as much as a TeaPubliKlan voter (and some quite a bit more) but those folks are still measured and so must be accounted for by the system. If non voters where instead third party and write in voters those tens of millions would create a political gravity that would completely change the entire dynamic because these folks would have to be dealt with rather than ignored or at most counted as a quiet approval of the status quo.

If she doesn't vote for one of the options on the ballot then you write someone in than you can vote for. If you cannot write in then your state is anti democratic and she should be working to restore her voice in the process.

I also think there is a honest opportunity to not just convince people to engage in their civic responsibility but it requires a painful level of honesty about what our party is and what it is likely to do.
If that can be credibly done, in an unvarnished fashion that gets their buy in as truth the blade can then be turned onto the TeaPubliKlans and despite the terrible flaws and frightful probable outcomes of Democratic party policies there is a depressingly stark contrast with the batshit foolishness that is the other operable choice.

No question I'm talking lesser evilism but done correctly it is done without tripping the "fear mongering" alarms that shut down the thinking process.

Common sense gets that paying some of the bills will leave you in a better spot than saying "fuck it" and paying none.
Sitting in a house with the lights and even the water off is better than adding homelessness to the problems.
People who have faced real adversity in their lives should be able to grasp that often on must choose among poor options and get to the next day with the least damage.
Of course accepting that logic only goes so far because those that have lived in such circumstances also know that such behavior only buys time and that at some point you can only escape a death spiral by getting a few shots at good choices in the space bought.

People understand buying time, don't even try to sell it as the fix. You don't have to even have a fix as long as you remain honest that you aren't offering one.