Where is our humanity?

[pipoman]

We live on a farm, we both grew up on farms. There are realities of farm life others here may not understand..One reality is feral animals. We regularly have have visitor cats here. Cats on a farm are working animals, they are different than house cats. We keep them in water and feed them just enough to keep them around, they get the rest of their nutrition by hunting rodents and some birds.

Last week my wife found a 8+/- weeks old kitten under our truck, no clue where it came from. It was scared and she finally lured it out and began taming it. We have 4 other outdoor kittens which are 3 months old, they wouldn't socialize with this kitten, so my wife began bringing it in the house to sleep and feed in our bathroom..then spend it's days outside. Last night the kitten was fine in our bathroom. This morning it couldn't walk, it's back legs were paralyzed. I went to work and my wife worked with the kitten to no avail..it was still paralyzed when I came home. Another reality of farm life..sometimes it is necessary to humanely euthanize an animal. I didn't need to spend $200 at the vet to find out the cat needs put to sleep and for the vet to dispose of the body. I euthanized the kitten as I have many times over my 30+ years of farm life. I did it because I respect the animal. Because the animal couldn't survive without more time and money than we are willing to spend, and even if it did survive it couldn't really be a cat.

Yesterday I put my sister in Hospice House. Hospice House is where my mother died of stomach cancer 2 years ago, now my sister is in the room next door. Pancreatic cancer is very painful in the final stages. So painful in fact that she is medicated almost into unconsciousness and yet she still has pain on her face. She may have days or a month left, her death is imminent. She is a registered nurse and fully understands her position. I have had her DPOA for years, she has had other health problems, and I've had to make life or death decisions for her. I know her wishes.

Where is our humanity when it comes to actual human suffering?

[Wounded Bear]

1. I feel for you....

I support "Right to Die" laws when they come up. It is tragic to make people suffer unnecessarily because of some outdated principle of the "sanctity" of life.

Best wishes to you and yours in your difficult time.

[shraby]

2. I'm sorry. So far only one state has seen fit to treat people as good as animals. They

have assisted suicide in Oregon. From what I've read, it's working very well for them and their citizens.

[RKP5637]

3. We have none. Both of my sisters went through very painful deaths with cancer. There is no humanity.

Somehow some feel pain and suffering means the fulfillment of life. We, IMO, are truly a F'ed up society.

[woo me with science]

4. K&R Thank you for posting this.

I wish there were a flower icon.

[longship]

5. Indeed, Hospice is wonderful.

When you get there, as both my parents did, make sure you have a primary care giver who understands your wishes.

It is the amongst the most important decisions you will ever make.

Republicans called them "death panels"; Keith Olbermann called them "life panels".

It makes a whole lot of difference.

[DreamGypsy]

6. Death with Dignity

As Shraby mentions, Oregon does have a Death with Dignity law.

From Wikipedia:

Measure 16 of 1994 established the U.S. state of Oregon's Death with Dignity Act (ORS 127.800-995[1]), which legalizes physician-assisted suicide with certain restrictions. Passage of this initiative made Oregon the first U.S. state and one of the first jurisdictions in the world to permit some terminally ill patients to determine the time of their own death.
...[/div

My wife and I moved to Oregon in 1991. We had been married in California in 1989. My Father died in 1988 after a number of years of mental decline and dementia (possibly Alzheimer's). My Father was a kind, caring, and wise man. He was a PhD Chemical Engineer who worked in the petroleum, ceramics, and, eventually, the nuclear power industries. My Mother kept a journal from Feb 29, 1988 (her birthday) until October 21, 1988, of my Father's stay in the last of a sequence of care facilities:

Feb 29, 1988: Status quo. Doing well, no problem the people tell me.
Mar 2, 1988: <friend> went up with me. C (my dad) slumped in chair. Felt head - hot - 102. Called Dr & he prescribed antibiotic. Probably pneumonia again. ...
<many entries>
Oct 20, 1988: I went up 19th and 20th -Nearing end, surely. No <illegible> on 20th, no sign of recognition by eye motion. Sleeping. Couldn't swallow (some medication) or any other meds. Could have seizure or hope he just sleeps away.
Oct 21, 1998: Spent over 3 hrs by his bedside. He kept having little seizures. Couldn't swallow water or meds, gaunt & must be down to 100 lbs. Looked terrible. Left at 2 pm.
... Call came at 7:10. He died at 7:05. Peace at last. Thanks be to God!!

In December 2001, my sister, brother, and I spent 4 or 5 hours around a hospital bed, after life support was removed according to my Mother's health directives, watching monitors showing vital signs as my comatose Mother died from a hemorrhage that occurred during surgery to remove a tumor from her medulla, probably the result of metastasis from lung cancer for which she had been treated several years previously. Her body would not die, but my Mother was gone long before the blips on the monitors went silent.

Among the things that came to me after her death was the journal about my Father.

I don't know what this all means. I don't know if there are any answers.

The New England singer/songwriter Bill Morrissey captured something of these musings in the title track of his album North in 1986, with a song of a man thinking of his deceased father:

Papa's been gone six years now
He got to choose the how, and when and where he'd die…
Papa told me once
A man must work if he's going to take care of his
You've got to work the big woods when that's the only work there is
But the big woods will just use you up
Drain your strength and soul
And ask for more
Until you find yourself a broken man pushing forty
And just can't do the job no more …
I believe I was the last one to see the old man alive
He lost his job at forty-one, took himself out at forty-five
I saw him walking down the tote road with his 12-gauge pump
and a pint of rye
And it just wasn't in me to stop him
Goodbye papa, goodbye…

[tavalon]

7. I couldn't agree more

We allow our pets euthanization when it's necessary but not our fellow humans. It's disgraceful. I am so sorry about the pain your sister is going through.

[Egalitarian Thug]

8. I think society forces our loved one's to suffer because of fear of the inevitable.

I'm so sorry for what you and your sister are going through.

My sister and I have gone through this as well and it is absolutely cruel for everybody. We made plans.

[pipoman]

9. i mentioned sis is a RN..

Today there are 6 RNs hanging around her room..they all love her and are caring for her like only 6 RNs with one patient can..

Anyway..over dinner tonite I told them this story..all agreed that adults should be able to make these decisions for themselves..

I believe her suffering is nearly over...what about the next "cindy"?