I suspect this guy does not have a girlfriend and never will

[Quixote1818]

[NBachers]

1. And, I believe, his shirt says, "A TRUE CHRISTIAN" in caps lock

[xfundy]

4. "True Christian" always needs a ™!

Always! True Christians™ are making mint off rubes, and those other religions eat into their market share! Then, among True Christians™, some are Truer Christians™ than others. True Christians™ still hate Catolicks, Mor(m)ons, etc., and still talk at the Sunday dinner table about how all other denominations (i.e., non-Southern Batshits) are gonna BURN. I grew up in that twisted environment,and nothing has really changed. They've all tried to come together to present a united front, but it's only for show, and IF and WHEN a "True Christian™" ever gets in charge, they will demand all the infidels either accept their mythology or die (though maybe it might just be deportation at first).

All over an invisible man.

Would be laughable if not so tragically close by.

[RKP5637]

84. Yep, a "Real Christian!" And Trademarked too! Wonder if he's also a "Real American," and a

"Real Patriot," that the RW is so fond of talking about.

[roguevalley]

44. he should check my middle finger for details.

[Whovian]

119. Maybe they were out of the "FAKE CHRISTIAN" shirts that day?

[xfundy]

2. What a hunk!

Of something...

[ballabosh]

37. Ham? nt

[DiverDave]

141. The body is a temple of GOD

and it seems this fat slob sorta forgot that.

[Rosa Luxemburg]

140. A blob?

[OriginalGeek]

3. lol at his shirt

The church I grew up in believes everything on the sign but they woulda made that backsliding heathen cut his hair.

He's no true christian.

[xfundy]

5. AMEN and GLORY!

He'd have to wear a suit and tie as well. So he could have bidniss with BabyJeebus™.

[OriginalGeek]

69. I know RIGHT!?

God doesn't even listen to people in jeans and t-shirts...I pass a mega church on my way to town fairly often and if it's a Sunday I see people going in dressed in shorts and flip flops! Women even! Wearing PANTS! I expect Sweet little BabyJeebus is laughing at them as they walk into their den of iniquity thinking they going to church...




(lolz)

[Jamastiene]

102. The school I went to would tell him he is going to Hell

if his hair so much as touched his ears. He's working on the Ninth Circle with that head of stringy, greasy looking hair.

[SunSeeker]

6. Looks like Nugent's really let himself go....

[orpupilofnature57]

77. +1000

[SammyWinstonJack]

109. lol

[47of74]

143. LOL

[Initech]

7. His shirt should actually read "I am anti progress".

[Tigress DEM]

8. I thought #6 said "Mostly Depressed" lol

[undeterred]

68. That adequately describes the "True Christian Woman".

[Indpndnt]

9. Whoa. That's a guy?

I thought it was Honey Boo Boo's mom at first glance. I need sleep.

[Mopar151]

48. Have a hug, dude

Those are some bad image for the ol' memory bank. It'll be OK. You should think about something purer and with real beauty - mabye a cutie at the beach playing with puppies or a field of flowers

[Jamastiene]

103. ...

This deserves a DUzy.

[Zambero]

10. Isn't all that stuff plagiarized?

Lifted directly from the 2012 GOP platform?

[Marie Marie]

11. I think I'm in love.

Anybody get this guy's phone number?

[tavalon]

53. Nope, but I can get you the name of a good therapist

Kidding.

[Care Acutely]

12. Where/when was this fantasmic display of mantilect?

I'll bet his mommy washed his clothes for his little get-together too.

How big do you reckon his pile of porn is? We had a gentleman in our facility once upon a time that had 2.4 tons (yes you read that right) seized and removed from the apartment he was evicted from. There are hoarders of everything it seems, and the loss of his porn left him feeling suicidal.

On second thought, this guy might look familiar . . . .

[TheMightyFavog]

92. Almost TWO AND A HALF TONS of pr0n?

O.o

That's a lot of fucking porn....

Pun intended.

[47of74]

95. What, did someone weigh it?

Was there one room in this apartment stuffed full of this stuff?

[Care Acutely]

135. Yes, they weighed it at the local recycling center (I suspect partly for fun) and sent it

To Asia, because that's where our recycled paper is sold.

My job is never boring.

[marasinghe]

13. i suspect you are correct ....

'cos "girl-friend", in his mind, probably means a faceless female cooking up a storm & serving it to him, on the couch in front of the tv, continuously during his waking hours spent in the home.

notice: none of his bible quotes are from Jesus himself (assuming his existence).

[iemitsu]

34. or maybe the girlfriend is a blow-up plastic doll.

no real woman should feel that low about herself.

[marasinghe]

41. agree with you, absolutely.

if my daughter ever subscribed to that pathological mindset, i would consider myself a total failure as a father.

[iemitsu]

50. well, you can't control everything.

but you would certainly have every right to be disappointed.

[Angry Dragon]

42. LOL

[Darth_Kitten]

65. Blow-up doll left him and took the flatscreen.

[iemitsu]

85. because she brought the flatscreen to the relationship.

mr big chin was using his mother's old, cast-off black and white before beulah the blow-up arrived.

[Darth_Kitten]

115. Impressive.

[tarheelsunc]

14. "True Christians"

care about feeding the hungry, clothing the poor, and healing the sick WITHOUT calling them moochers for the fact that they need it.

[D23MIURG23]

75. That's called a "no true scotsman" fallacy.

You can't just redefine your favorite label whenever it turns out that some asshole uses it.

[jtuck004]

15. Bet he does. n/t

[Arugula Latte]

16. He does so have a girlfriend! Here is her picture:

[bluesbassman]

17. LOL. And his on the box.

[Sen. Walter Sobchak]

56. Okay... I am going to out myself as a total sexual rube here

But what the fuck does one actually do with that thing that could possibly be pleasurable?

[Jamastiene]

105. There are entire sections of web sites devoted to videos of guys

doing their dolls. I know there are usually 3 holes on the dolls that they use, but I'm female. So, I can't answer the question you asked about what is pleasurable, but I've seen videos.

[Sen. Walter Sobchak]

113. sounds like fucking a waterwing

Yeah... that just doesn't do anything for me.

[Jamastiene]

148. I'm sure there is video of that out there.

If you want to avoid being offended while looking for Halloween costumes of animals, you might want to make sure AdBlock knows to stop the keywords: Brony, bronies, furry, furries
while you are at it. Lol, the internet truly has it all, even the stuff we wish we could unsee,

[cyglet]

124. I really could've gone my whole life

without knowing that

[Jamastiene]

146. I could have too, but

someone on DU asked and I have had the unfortunate experience of seeing links to that stuff off the side of a page. I hate ads that get through AdBlock, especially those freaky ones.

[JHB]

138. I'm sorry, ma'm, but that information is on a need-to-know basis...

...and Sweet JEzus! I didn't need to know that!

[Kennah]

137. You see, when a man and a plastic balloon love each other ...

[Jamastiene]

147. ...

[iemitsu]

88. wow, mr macho snagged himself an airline stewardess.

bet his gang of basement buddies are jealous.

[Initech]

123. "Note to self: making love to blow up doll not as good as advertised."

- from the movie Dirty Work

[busterbrown]

18. Titus 2.....

looks like he's got a couple of tituses....

[midnight]

19. Koch head sign holder....

[jberryhill]

20. Are you sure that's a guy?

[blogslut]

125. I was thinking the same thing

[existentialist]

21. Too bad that

Michelle Bachmann is already spoken for.

[DemKittyNC]

22. I don't understand?

He is very appealing, I would totally date hi.... Wait! WTF? Ironing?! Fuck that!


Never mind...

[Confusious]

35. Would you do it for a..

George Clooney?

[formercia]

106. Duct Tape Brazilian?

Oh, right...True 'Christian' women don't shave.

[PD Turk]

23. LOL

My wife was just walking by the computer and paused to read that sign over my shoulder. After a minute she said "I wonder how he'd like having that sign shoved up his ass!"

[DemKittyNC]

26. hahaha!

That is funny, I was thinking kind of the same thing. Great minds think alike.


Of course he might like that as I am sure that would be more action then he has ever gotten in his entire life.

[PD Turk]

28. yeah I love her

but I've always told her not to give up the day job to join the diplomatic corps

[47of74]

97. I think I do too!

[KT2000]

31. Ha! Too funny

and couldn't agree more.

[kestrel91316]

98. He'd probably prefer a hawt chick with a strap-on.

[chollybocker]

24. I Douchebag, 24:7 - "Let there be sammiches."

[Amaril]

129. Ack!

[HughBeaumont]

25. What, exactly, BEGS for such a sign?

And I'm guessing this human roast beef sundae's "not exactly beating them off with a stick"?

[iemitsu]

91. yep, my guess is that he adopted the anti-woman stance

as a cover for why no woman would look at him twice.
the promise keeper, ultra-manly, medieval mindset this slob advertizes allows him to believe that his rejection by women is the result of the "feminazi" phenomena sweeping our godless nation.
if only we could keep women in their place the world would be wonderful for unattractive men?
i think that's the real message on the sign.

[allan01]

27. re:I suspect this guy does not have a girlfriend and never will

wonder if he secretly reads playboy? read the chapter before his verses and after . now just the ones he quotes.

[FourScore]

29. A TRUE ASSHOLE. N/T

[TreasonousBastard]

30. They don't have to cook?

Sit! I ain't buying that.

[WCGreen]

32. Mr. Twinkie short of a ton is such a catch...

I bet the babes are swarming all over him...

[Marr]

33. What he lacks in social graces, he makes up for in physical ugliness.

...

That IS a man, right?

[AsahinaKimi]

36. I wonder where I can get a

TRUE BUDDHIST tee shirt. I bet there are none available. But you know what? If I have to advertise it...It must mean something is missing.

[IrishAle]

38. ..and a Mullet shall lead them..

(NT)

[musette_sf]

39. he's a hunk a hunk

of burning goo

[freshwest]

40. Troubling that the sign looks mass produced. The country is doomed, damn those morons.

[DemKittyNC]

43. True

This looks way to sophisticated for this guy to have made himself.

[Jamastiene]

107. It is spelled right.

There is no way that guy made it himself.

[BadGimp]

45. his girlfriend is Rosie Palm

I confess she's mine too... but for different reasons

I know... I know

[Spitfire of ATJ]

46. It's times like this that I'm glad I'm not a woman.

It keeps me from the ugly visual of this guy crawling on top of me.

[DemKittyNC]

47. Gee, thanks

I had a different vision of him with that sign up his ass but now I got the crawling on top of me vision stuck in my head... damnit!

[Spitfire of ATJ]

49. See? I'm worth a read now and then.

[tavalon]

54. Trust me, that ugly visual never came into my mind

Me pointing and laughing until I couldn't breathe, that came to mind.

[Spitfire of ATJ]

55. "Praise the Lord and pass the cheesburgers" came to my mind.

[lexw]

51. I'm thinking....

...he couldn't read and someone told him it said something about Big Macs and 40 ounce sodas.

[Buns_of_Fire]

52. Sleep well tonight. The gene pool is a little bit safer. nt

[intaglio]

57. Nice sources - all forgeries

Sorry - Pseudepigraphical*

1 Timothy, written long after Paul was dead

Titus - same again

1 Peter - not by Peter even though it says it is and not by his "secretary" (actually courier) either

________________________________________

* Pseudepigraphical a polite word used by biblical scholars to hide the fact that much of the Bible is a forgery.

[mick063]

58. Let me play Match Maker

[Quixote1818]

96. She was annoying as hell! Here is another one he might actually get

[Matariki]

59. Are you sure that's a guy?

I think it's a woman. S/he has earrings. There must be something in the bible about dudes wearing earrings.

[Lucinda]

62. Yup.

I think so too.

[BlancheSplanchnik]

110. She needs to discover the BDSM community....

Then she'll be able to live out her submissive fantasies without hurting anyone.

Maybe even have a little fun in life! Turn that frown upsidedown!

(yeah, I think it's a woman too)

[Matariki]

150. Haha, I'll tell you a secret

I used to work at Amazon as an editor and I always classified christian 'marriage guides' of that sort into the BDSM section. True.

And I agree with you 100%

[BlancheSplanchnik]

152. really? HAHAHAHHAH, that's hilarious!!!!!! You got it right,

that's for sure!

There are relationship websites too that pretend to be christian/traditional. Like "taken in hand", for example. Just admit you're into kink, people!! You'll be much better off.

We're very nice people, really!

[qb]

60. It's probably also his Christian Mingle profile.

He's praying for a reply!

[treestar]

61. Even Christians no longer live like that

Women have roles in churches - even in the Catholic Church they can be lectors, plan things, be extraordinary ministers. This guy is lagging behind even the fundies.

[mzteris]

63. Actually, most fundies

Adhere to this principle. Know quite a few.

[stevenleser]

70. Yep, and all he needs to do is go to one of their churches to find girlfriends.

Sad really.

[TheMightyFavog]

94. Wisconsin Synod is notorious for this...

IIRC Women can't even serve on church councils. The highest chrch position a woman can aspire to in the WELS is sunday school teacher, pastor's/missionary's wife, or "Treasurer's assistant." (read: the assistant does all the real work, whilst the actual treasurer does nothing but report at the council meetings.)

They are truly the darkest of what Garrison Kiellor's describes as "Dark Lutherans."

[47of74]

100. Nice

Is that the branch the Gein family belonged to?

[mzteris]

118. I live in WI now,

but was in North Carolina for nearly 25 years before (grew up mainly in GA, AL, KY, SC & NC). I last lived in Wake Forest - home of the Southern Baptist Theological Seminary that turned Southern Baptists from moderate individualistic thinkers into brainwashed lockstep inerrancy fundamentalists. They did it by only allowing professors who were of like mind to teach the incoming aspiring theologians.

I also hs'd my son - (No need to get off on THAT tangent - our group was liberal thank you very much) - so was familiar with those who hs'ed for merely religious reasons. Unfortunately, there is a whole curriculum designed for the fundamentalist hsed daughter called "Hearthkeepers". It's designed to teach the females to grow up and be good wives, mothers, housekeepers, helpmeets, subservient children of God, the pastor, their husbands, (and yes in that order), and eventually even their own sons once they are men. It's truly abhorrent and awful. (But not a reason to take away the rights of parents to homeschool their children. Don't want to get into that argument, btw . . . just wanted to offer up evidence of the evil being done to women in the name of a patriarchal religion (though aren't they all? Well, excepting the Pagans)

[Darth_Kitten]

64. Hey, sit and spin on it, boy.

He's just sore and bitter because women have something called lives.

[GoCubsGo]

66. He needs to move to Saudi Arabia.

Or, the Taliban-controlled parts of Afghanistan. I think he'd be really happy there. But, then again, I would pity the poor woman who would be his arranged wife. Better he stay here with his porn collection and his idiotic sign.

[MineralMan]

67. Let me know where he is with that sign.

I can send some 20-something women over there to mock him a bit.

[TahitiNut]

71. His mother must be so proud.

[Robb]

72. Proverbs 23:21 ...

"For the drunkard and the glutton shall come to poverty / and drowsiness shall clothe him with rags."

[Honeycombe8]

73. I'd agree, based on his looks. But as for the sign, you'd be surprised how many religious women

agree. They like the idea of abdicating the responsibility for their lives to another. Maybe that's who Romney was referring to in his 47% speech?

[TwilightGardener]

74. Any takers, ladies?

[Xipe Totec]

76. The book of Peter.... Where else.... nt

[valerief]

78. This is what religious subsidies by the govt give us.

[RKP5637]

79. Gee, it's in the bible, so we all gotta do it - what a F'en fool ...

[SDjack]

80. Jesus is so lucky to have him! nt

[RKP5637]

81. I wish we had a time machine so jerks like this could go live in

the period of time they desire so much.

[RKP5637]

82. ... nor a boyfriend! n/t

[aandegoons]

83. Proverbs 23:2

Of course it is always someone else who needs to follow the bible.

[Fla Dem]

86. It just stuns me that in this day and age, in this country, there are such backward people. n/t

[Zax2me]

87. Are you sure that is a guy?

[gleannfia]

89. Well, duh

Just look at this fucking slob.

[PA Democrat]

90. Did he leave his club and spear back at the cave?

[47of74]

93. And it's prboably been years since he's seen his only willie!

[blueamy66]

99. what an a**hole

fat, ugly, long crappy looking hair....he's just pissed cause no chick will date him, better yet marry him

and like another poster stated....no cooking? he really NEEDS a cook! he's wasting away...skin and bones!

[lonestarnot]

101. Good gawd.

[Alduin]

104. Oooh, that guy will turn me straight.

[StarryNite]

108. Hubba, hubba...

what a tub a shit!

[former9thward]

111. Don't be so sure.

Serial killers in prison get love letters and marriage proposals from women all of the time.

[47of74]

112. I've sent a message to the Duchess...

A photo like this of an inbred douche fountain holding a moronic sign is just begging for a response from her. Hopefully she'll oblige.

[City Lights]

114. Yuk.

[sarcasmo]

116. Wow! He must have women lined up at the door.

[sabrina 1]

117. I'm betting he's a comedian!

'doing dishes' etc. This has to be comedy!

[flyguyjake]

120. And he should go on a diet and get a haircut!

[YellowRubberDuckie]

121. I REALLY think that's a woman...

Earrings, facial structure (What little you can see) and the fingernails are very feminine. I'm large, but at least you can tell what gender I am. Just saying.

[Oilwellian]

127. Most women don't cut their sideburns like that

unless they have very short hair. This looks like a man to me. I also suspect this is the loneliest man in the world.

[YellowRubberDuckie]

131. Men don't keep their nails like that...

And it looks like she hasn't cut her hair or styled it in a while, so I don't think we can judge by the sideburns.

[KG]

130. It's Pat?

[JoePhilly]

122. Is he a translater for the Taliban?

[Bluzmann57]

126. Well there's always a hand

Right and left. Aaahhhh...never mind. And I hope children don't read my smut.

[L0oniX]

128. Standard Mormon doctrine?

[Cleita]

132. Not unless he kidnaps one and keeps her tied up in the basement. n/t

[appleannie1]

133. No wonder he is huge. Holding up that sign was the most work he has done in his life.

Bet his mother was abused by his father and he thinks it is normal and she still waits on Jr. to this day. No other woman would want any part of him.

[The Doctor.]

134. It would be difficult to respect any woman

that agreed with any damn thing this guy thinks.

I can only imagine a few exceptions.

[distantearlywarning]

136. Oooh, he looks like quite a catch!

I bet women are lined up around the block to get a piece of that!

(Do I even need a sarcasm smiley?)

[47of74]

142. Lol, yes they probably are...

He's probably got a whole bunch of women off camera trying to throw themselves at him.

[Guy Montag]

139. Isn't this Willard Rmoney's specialist in charge of overcoming the candidate's gender gap?

If he's not, he's missing his calling.

[HillWilliam]

144. Seen on FB

"I don't take advice from guys with mullets"

[aikoaiko]

145. All I have to say is even Hitler had a girlfriend.

oy!

[revolution breeze]

149. OMG, first glance I thought that was my sister-in-law

Thought her evangelical husband was punishing her for daring to talk "politics" with us "ladies" at the family reunion last weekend. She told us her hasband did not allow her to vote but she liked Obama. I told her she needed to wake up and realize she had rights. Also offered to have her brother talk with her husband and offered her a roof is she and the children decide to get awayfrom him.

[bulloney]

151. A looker like him? You don't think he'll ever find a woman?

I don't know what's uglier...his mind or his physical appearance.

I think the doctors accidentally threw out the baby and kept the placenta when he was born.