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Nikki28

(575 posts)
Mon Nov 9, 2020, 10:45 AM Nov 2020

OMG I can't take my sister anymore

She came to my house after talking on the phone. She said the elections was stolen because she saw the Democrats throwing away ballets.There is no talking this woman down. I can't believe my own family could be brain washed like this. She is stocking up because she feels things will go bad because the election was stolen from her god Trump. I tried telling her this is not true and we get into it,so I skip the subject. Guys this brain washing is real. My sister use to be a strong woman until Trump. She pulls up garbage on YTUBE and tells me she researched it and found Bill Gates wants us to put a microchip in our head and I sent her a link where this was a conspiracy.She was having non of that. I was hoping after Biden won, she would snap out of it, but she has gotten worst, so much so that she did not vote because she felt Trump had it in the bag as ordained by God and I honestly feel my sister is gone coo coo.I rather she not come to my house because when we are all eating together and even my brother who was fine with Trump came around,but when we talk about how evil Trump is, she goes in another room. She will talk all over you and will not listen. It is like she put cotton in her ears when it comes to this man.I am at the end of my rope.

38 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
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OMG I can't take my sister anymore (Original Post) Nikki28 Nov 2020 OP
you are not alone HAB911 Nov 2020 #1
It is universal axiom about cult members ... mr_lebowski Nov 2020 #2
Last words to my own sister: Goodheart Nov 2020 #3
Sorry to hear about your sister PJMcK Nov 2020 #4
I feel bad for you. She sounds just like my brother. MAGA is the world's largest cult. Statistical Nov 2020 #5
The next brainwashed meme is to whine about a redo, because, "we just want it to be fair." Baitball Blogger Nov 2020 #6
"Like she put cotton in her ears." They are all like that! All of them. A sign of brainwashing. Doodley Nov 2020 #7
Deprogramming takes time MacKasey Nov 2020 #8
It is far easier to fool someone than to convince them they've been fooled... Wounded Bear Nov 2020 #9
Has your sister reported this crime she claims to have seen? Mariana Nov 2020 #10
I do not Nikki28 Nov 2020 #33
It was some asshat burning sample ballots. Totally fake. Celerity Nov 2020 #35
Sorry for your loss roscoeroscoe Nov 2020 #11
She's your sister, get her some help Loge23 Nov 2020 #12
I'm betting EVERYONE of us has this problem! (i do to) bluestarone Nov 2020 #13
I was talking to my conservative sister last night kirkuchiyo Nov 2020 #14
Tell her to write it down gratuitous Nov 2020 #15
This is a great idea cutroot Nov 2020 #18
That's a fantastic proposal Hav Nov 2020 #28
Good advice PatSeg Nov 2020 #29
The more you argue with someone who's accepted a conspiracy theory, The Velveteen Ocelot Nov 2020 #16
Very true. Don't argue with these people. Merlot Nov 2020 #26
Thank you Nikki28 Nov 2020 #34
John Steinbeck made this observation in "Travels with Charley" Binkie The Clown Nov 2020 #17
So I guess these political family feuds are nothing new PatSeg Nov 2020 #31
It's a cult for many with Trump as their leader andym Nov 2020 #19
Right wingers are narcissists I_UndergroundPanther Nov 2020 #20
:) Pretty sure you've got lots of reserves of the strength and rationality she doesn't. Hortensis Nov 2020 #21
I had a really good friend to turn into a Trumper. Ligyron Nov 2020 #22
I have a friend on Facebook who suggested we all go to Parler and sign up. Most people Tess49 Nov 2020 #24
Sounds pretty normal for a Qanon follower - there are extensive resources on the internet to confirm Klaralven Nov 2020 #23
lame. Why I keep telling people that things can still unravel. Saboburns Nov 2020 #25
You're going to have to ghost her. lagomorph777 Nov 2020 #27
I'm sorry you're so close to this situation..... Upthevibe Nov 2020 #30
This is why I have zero contact with either of my siblings Bettie Nov 2020 #32
I agree Nikki28 Nov 2020 #36
You sister is my favorite kind of republican... jcgoldie Nov 2020 #37
She's going through stages of grief -allbeit like a 13 year old would. haele Nov 2020 #38
 

mr_lebowski

(33,643 posts)
2. It is universal axiom about cult members ...
Mon Nov 9, 2020, 10:47 AM
Nov 2020

If you ask THEM, none are in a cult.

Even though they clearly are.

She's going to need extensive deprogramming I'm afraid.

Hope she gets the help she needs.

PJMcK

(22,965 posts)
4. Sorry to hear about your sister
Mon Nov 9, 2020, 10:50 AM
Nov 2020

I've lost half a dozen friends because of their support for Trump. I cannot respect anyone who believes even just one word out of Trump's mouth!

You know the old axiom: You can pick your friends, you can pick your nose but you can't pick your family.

Good luck, Nikki28.

Statistical

(19,264 posts)
5. I feel bad for you. She sounds just like my brother. MAGA is the world's largest cult.
Mon Nov 9, 2020, 10:50 AM
Nov 2020

Deprogramming cult members is incredibly challenging and takes huge amounts of time. How do you do that for 70 million people?

Wounded Bear

(60,759 posts)
9. It is far easier to fool someone than to convince them they've been fooled...
Mon Nov 9, 2020, 10:52 AM
Nov 2020

Gonna be a long deprogramming process.

Mariana

(15,173 posts)
10. Has your sister reported this crime she claims to have seen?
Mon Nov 9, 2020, 10:53 AM
Nov 2020

If she saw anyone throwing away ballots, she's an important witness, and she should report what she saw to federal and state officials.

Nikki28

(575 posts)
33. I do not
Tue Nov 10, 2020, 08:10 AM
Nov 2020

I do not know where she got it from, but she says she saw it on the news. I can only assume Fox or in her mind youtube. It is like a witch came and kidnapped my sister's brain. This is so hard guys. We use to be so close,so much so that we could finish the other sentence. This is so hurtful and disheartening to see my own sister possibly when she dies,going out brainwashed. I will never forgive this brain washing.I am fearful for her. She use to council me when I was going through things.Now I can't even recognize her.It is amazing how a educated smart woman with two kids that use to have strong faith in God could turn her back on reality like this.Trump is a freaking demon and Fox is the tipping point. I am so hurt that I am praying for all Fox news,republicans all be at the White house and it gets blown up.That is the evil that comes to me, than I think of there would be still seventy million feeling the same way.Very sad.Thanks for you guys replies.I don't feel alone now knowing others are going through this.I have no idea what to do next except ban her from my home, but that won't last lone.I am at the end of my ropes.

roscoeroscoe

(1,630 posts)
11. Sorry for your loss
Mon Nov 9, 2020, 10:54 AM
Nov 2020

Try not to let it get to you. We've got to stay on an even keel and not let these fools bend reality. It's a shame really, a real shame, to see Trumper's and Q's so far gone. I'm afraid, like many have said - the internet has set us free - and it hasn't turned out well! Good luck and, good luck to your sister!

Loge23

(3,922 posts)
12. She's your sister, get her some help
Mon Nov 9, 2020, 10:54 AM
Nov 2020

Mental illness is apparently endemic among the IPOTUS supporters - this is not meant to be cute, this is obviously true.
They are completely overwhelmed by some bizarre fantasy, reinforced by other insane people.
Some are just mean, but many need real help - and it's a big problem.

bluestarone

(18,330 posts)
13. I'm betting EVERYONE of us has this problem! (i do to)
Mon Nov 9, 2020, 10:54 AM
Nov 2020

My whole family are TRUMPERS except one! It's really hard to witness RUMPERS have this kind of power! UNEXPLAINABLE to me!

kirkuchiyo

(402 posts)
14. I was talking to my conservative sister last night
Mon Nov 9, 2020, 10:55 AM
Nov 2020

She's been watch RuPauls drag race recently and LOVES it. And she has seen how conservatives vilify people like and she actually said, these ar the people I've been voting for all along? Not any more I'm not...

I was SO proud of her.

To bad our mother is a complete raving lunatic trumpster. I will never speak to her again if I have any say in it.

gratuitous

(82,849 posts)
15. Tell her to write it down
Mon Nov 9, 2020, 10:56 AM
Nov 2020

To take just one example, Bill Gates and the microchipping. Tell her to write it down, and when it's going to happen. By February 1? July 1? Write it down, the date, and put your initials on it. Now give me the piece of paper. Set an alarm on your cell phone or Google calendar for the date. Then bring out the paper your sister wrote, and show it to her. Break the spell. For some additional fun, put $20 on it.

Just say, "You know, I'm not arguing with you anymore. You're so sure you're right, write it down and put a date on it. If you don't do that, I say even you don't believe what you're saying. If you're not willing to write it down and put a date on it, then you have to put a sock in it."

Hav

(5,969 posts)
28. That's a fantastic proposal
Mon Nov 9, 2020, 12:14 PM
Nov 2020

and it works for pretty much every delusion they have (Biden implementing socialism, taking away the guns, banning religion, Covid disappearing after the election,...).
They'll certainly find excuses because such a cognitive dissonance is hard to overcome. But when everything they claimed turns out to be false, maybe there's hope.

PatSeg

(49,751 posts)
29. Good advice
Mon Nov 9, 2020, 12:36 PM
Nov 2020

There's not a whole lot we can do with some of these people. No matter how many facts, reason, or evidence we present, they are still listening to Fox and right-wing radio and reading right-wing blogs. Deprogramming usually takes cutting off the sources of the propaganda.

My ex husband was talking about Bill Gates and the whole microchipping conspiracy theory. It was really bizarre, as he is a very intelligent man. Then his computer died and he became relatively rational again, so apparently he was hooked on some bizarre right-wing websites.

The Velveteen Ocelot

(121,211 posts)
16. The more you argue with someone who's accepted a conspiracy theory,
Mon Nov 9, 2020, 11:07 AM
Nov 2020

the more they'll believe the theory and conclude you are part of it because you tried to talk them out of it. By presenting them with facts and arguing with them you are actually strengthening their belief in the conspiracy. People who are members of small, isolated cults can sometimes be removed from the cult and deprogrammed, but when the cult consists of millions of free-range lunatics, all you can do is remove yourself and let them burn themselves out.

Nikki28

(575 posts)
34. Thank you
Tue Nov 10, 2020, 08:18 AM
Nov 2020

I agree which is why I told her when this subject come up-it is best we leave it alone because would would argue. This nonsense is causing me to lose my best friend-my baby sister.I am so heartbroken.Thanks you also for all suggestions and I may have to come to that.Right now,I better leave her be because enough damage has already been done.

Binkie The Clown

(7,911 posts)
17. John Steinbeck made this observation in "Travels with Charley"
Mon Nov 9, 2020, 11:09 AM
Nov 2020
In my young days in Monterey County, a hundred miles south of San Francisco, everyone was a Republican. My family was Republican. I might still be one if I had stayed there. President Harding stirred me toward the Democratic party, President Hoover cemented me there. If I indulge in personal political history, it is because I think my experience may not be unique.

I arrived in Monterey and the fight began. My sisters are still Republicans. Civil war is supposed to be the bitterest of all wars, and surely family politics are the most vehement and venomous. I can discuss politics coldly and analytically with strangers. That was not possible with my sisters. We ended each session panting with rage. On no point was there any compromise. No quarter was asked or given.

Each evening we promised, "Let's just be friendly and loving. No politics tonight." And ten minutes later we would be screaming at each other.

andym

(5,707 posts)
19. It's a cult for many with Trump as their leader
Mon Nov 9, 2020, 11:11 AM
Nov 2020

and Right-Wing social networks as their social support group supported by the right-wing propagandist news. The nation is in deep trouble, because the Republicans have their own Orwellian 1984 brainwashing system in place.

I_UndergroundPanther

(12,952 posts)
20. Right wingers are narcissists
Mon Nov 9, 2020, 11:15 AM
Nov 2020

Or fearful authoritarians looking for a leader that will supposedly by stoking far and hate and normalizing it to remove the personal responsibility of being a decent person and honoring the social contract.

Are they narcissists creating more dark triads by bringing out the ugly true nature of these people?

Hortensis

(58,785 posts)
21. :) Pretty sure you've got lots of reserves of the strength and rationality she doesn't.
Mon Nov 9, 2020, 11:15 AM
Nov 2020

This is a time of great anxiety and outright fear for those who've gone full coo-coo. Give your sister time to get past it and calm down.

One of our neighbors, an intelligent, kind, charming, successful man has also gone full-wingnut, religious-political version. We'd never have guessed it. His wife died last spring after a lengthy bout with cancer; and although we thought he was handling it well, turns out he really needs her. And she's gone. The whacko pastor of his megachurch instead remains, calling on the armies of god to take to the battlefield against the great socialist evil about to destroy us all.

Your post suggests you can all help her by not badmouthing Trump when she's there. Discuss the good things you all look forward to. Security, stability, normalcy. America still here.

Ligyron

(7,904 posts)
22. I had a really good friend to turn into a Trumper.
Mon Nov 9, 2020, 11:20 AM
Nov 2020

He’s a nice guy and pretty popular his Facebook page has about 60 people on and off and on many are from Connecticut mostly and of Italian origin. Over the last four or five years I’ve been watching him get deeper and deeper into this Trump cult along with his friends and aquantences and I talk to them politely mostly asking questions the ol’ Socratic way and have had a lot of fun playing with them. None are very smart or hold down white collar jobs and from what I can tell have any college what so ever. Well yesterday do you know he’s getting off Facebook can’t take it anymore all the celebrating the downfall of Trump with dancing in the streets so he and quite a few more are going on something called parlor. it’s some kind of conservative site I believe and I’m really gonna miss fucking with them since their the only ones I know.

Tess49

(1,598 posts)
24. I have a friend on Facebook who suggested we all go to Parler and sign up. Most people
Mon Nov 9, 2020, 11:30 AM
Nov 2020

said, "um, no thanks". I had never heard of the site.

 

Klaralven

(7,510 posts)
23. Sounds pretty normal for a Qanon follower - there are extensive resources on the internet to confirm
Mon Nov 9, 2020, 11:21 AM
Nov 2020

every opinion that you have heard.

I tried to disabuse someone specifically about the Gates microchip in vaccines stuff. No matter what you knock down, there is always another internet site that they can point to. And this was someone who should be able to understand power budgets, antenna sizes, etc. and realize that it is completely batshit crazy.

A lot seems to be based on logical arguments where a word used in one sense in one subject is assumed to have the same meaning in another subject. And "chip" is a perfect word for constructing fallacious arguments.

I'm not sure how this will all turn out for the true believers. Their friends are worried about them and their doomsday prepping.

Saboburns

(2,807 posts)
25. lame. Why I keep telling people that things can still unravel.
Mon Nov 9, 2020, 11:48 AM
Nov 2020

We are dealing with Stalin levels of cult of personality. I say don't cower in fear, but don't think shit can't turn crazy here either.

Because, remember, they have no bottom and anything is possible.

Upthevibe

(9,201 posts)
30. I'm sorry you're so close to this situation.....
Mon Nov 9, 2020, 12:52 PM
Nov 2020

I can't imagine having a family member who lives close by who's a dt supporter (in this cult of personality or a QAnon follower). I'm mourning the loss of a very good friend who's "joined" QAnon. We haven't spoken in a month and we used to speak every other day. Her daughter (who's in her 40's) called me in tears yesterday because she had to hang up on her mother who was going on and on about "the deep state, the babies & the children, the cabal." She said she felt like her mom was in Scientology or Jim Jones-People's Temple and she didn't know when she'd be able to stomach her again. I told her I felt the loss too but there's simply no reasoning with dt and/or QAnon believers.

Bettie

(17,241 posts)
32. This is why I have zero contact with either of my siblings
Mon Nov 9, 2020, 01:26 PM
Nov 2020

and as little as possible with the husband's siblings.

Nikki28

(575 posts)
36. I agree
Tue Nov 10, 2020, 08:28 AM
Nov 2020

The Jim Jones thing had me wondering awhile ago.I heard Trump spewing his garbage and pulled up Jim Jones before the suicides began,and Trump sounded just like him.I really believe this is where we are.I think my sister is gone.I only see her on occasion and I refuse to take politics with her.I am sick of the digging in or doubling down.The less I see of her the better.She just has togo down alone because I will not get my nears worked up in arguments with her again.I am sick of being patient that her mind will see the light and change.I am done with it.Thank you all so much.

haele

(13,598 posts)
38. She's going through stages of grief -allbeit like a 13 year old would.
Tue Nov 10, 2020, 08:59 AM
Nov 2020

Trump encouraged his marginally racist followers to Infantasize themselves and give him responsibility for their lives, so facing reality is as traumatic as a six-year-old watching daddy go to prison after being found guilty of being a serial killer - "but he was a great daddy to meeee..."

If she is a strong, halfway intelligent woman, she will get over it in six to eight months when nothing extraordinary thatDrumpf and his enablers threaten happens and everyday life continues. She will eventually reach acceptance - even if she will never admit to herself how vulnerable her personal weaknesses made her are when she allowed a grifter to spoon-feed her flattering conspiracies.

Haele

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