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Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region ForumsLong-term Caregiving May Shorten Life Up To Eight Years
A NEW STUDY by Ohio State University in conjunction with the National Institute on Aging has shown that adult children caring for their parents, as well as parents caring for chronically ill children, may have their life span shortened by four to eight years.snip
The team's research provided physical evidence that the effects of chronic stress, which is often part of the caregiving life, can be seen both at the genetic and molecular levels. They used volunteers who were Alzheimer's caregivers and compared them with an equal number of non-caregivers matched for age, gender and other health and environmental aspects. The researchers looked at blood samples from each group for differences in the telomeres as well as populations of immune cells.
According to Glaser, "Caregivers showed the same kind of patterns present in the study of mothers of chronically ill kids." He added that the changes the Ohio State-NIA team saw amounted to a shortened lifespan of four to eight years. The researchers believe that the changes in these immune cells represent the complete cell population in the body, suggesting that all the body's cells have aged the same amount as the immune cells.
snip
Not surprisingly, the caregivers also differed dramatically with the control group on psychological surveys intended to measure depression which is often a sign of stress. According to Glaser, symptoms of depression in caregivers were twice as severe as those among the control group.
Ohio State is now looking at creating studies to find out how to intervene with the stress that comes with providing care for vulnerable people. They hope to find a way to slow the weakening of the caregiver's immune systems.
Caregiving has many rewards, however there's no getting around the fact that caring for a vulnerable loved one is stressful. As a caregiver for multiple people, I've reminded myself that my parents or others I've cared for wouldn't want my life shortened because of their needs. Still, I haven't always followed the path of faithful self care.
more https://www.healthcentral.com/article/longterm-caregiving-may-shorten-life-up-to-eight-years
I know most will not read this.
I am a caregiver and I love all of you that have done the same.
Hard for us elders to do this. It shortens are life , so be it.
niyad
(112,438 posts)Unending stress does take its toll. But we do it from love and caring and compassion.
Backseat Driver
(4,339 posts)while in your 20's and 30's, maybe even 40s, has its charms but bought my brother something far more costly - owning the stress that stole away his health and fortune of life experience and growth but influenced his unhealthy choices. The things some do for parasitic parental love and manipulative helplessness isn't called caregiving; it's called stagnation and estrangement from one's own life and relationships that is perpetrated by brainwashing guilt installed in his by the toxically dysfunctional and deranged.
shrike3
(3,283 posts)He lost his job, moved in with Mom. She died, and the house had to be sold. Mortgage was so high he got very little money out of it. Now he's an older guy trying to find a job and no one wants him. Part of this is his fault because he refused to think ahead.
FalloutShelter
(11,750 posts)Our sixties, caring for our parents through several medical emergencies, rehabs, nursing homes, in home aides and hospice...and then covid hit. Now I wonder where the decade went.
While we have no regrets, it was painful and arduous. I am not surprised to read these findings. t
Those years were, by turn terrifying, uplifting, and soul crushing. It is the price you pay for love.
tosh
(4,422 posts)I spent my 40's in that state, only THANKFULLY without COVID.
My brother absconded to the opposite cornwer of the continent. After 11 years with my parents (no regrets, happy that I could be there but damn...) then Mr. tosh, an only child went through same for 5 years with his.
Every day now we say thanks that we didn't have COVID to contend with.
I hope you find the time and the strength to do nice things for yourselves. It is hard under the best circumstances, but these are far from the best.
spooky3
(34,303 posts)You find it easier to self-care as time goes by.
Poiuyt
(18,087 posts)I consider those years to be a blessing.
First Speaker
(4,858 posts)...it's pretty much screwed up any plans I had for my own life, but nobody else was willing to do it. My mother, my sister, my partner, my best friend...all gone now, but I did the best I could. I believe this story. I've been so stressed out over everything for so long that I'm feeling a helluva lot older than my years (68.) I don't really want to get too much older, because someone would have to care for me, and there's no one to do it...
MerryBlooms
(11,728 posts)Was diagnosed with an aggressive cancer in 2001, and I lost him in 2002.
Now I care for my 79 y/o sister and 2 male clients. I am so tired, and I have my own physical limitations... I am considering filing for disability. I will still care for my sister. I have 3 hernias that need repair, trying to hold off until spring for surgery.
I love my clients, but it's just so hard on me.
sheshe2
(83,355 posts)Please take care of you.
Meowmee
(5,164 posts)Last edited Sat Jan 15, 2022, 05:05 AM - Edit history (1)
That actually supports and helps people taking care of family/ friends etc. financially and in every other way instead of raping them financially and attacking them? That would certainly cut down on the stress. I know that will never happen here though. The hospice and elder care systems are billions dollar industries and scams for the most part.
ShazzieB
(15,958 posts)If only. *weary sigh*
Dream on 😿
electric_blue68
(14,623 posts)governmental services for a relative, partner, or friend to become a paid care giver.
That might help for some 1) to off set monies needed to pay for things that aren't able to be paid for by outside sources,
2) the caregiver could some of that money to hire someone else to do short term (several days) caregiving so that the regulator care giver could go stay with relatives, friends, or a decent hotel somewhere interesting for a few days.
My parents were in the same nursing home which was mostly a good, sometimes very good place. Visiting them;
if I hadn't been living relatively far away by public transportation which meant at the very, very least a 1 1/2 trip often 2+ hrs each way I'd have visited more often. My mom every ?2 - 4 wks. Sometimes 6 weeks. I was on the phone w her at least 1x - 2x wk (she didn't like talking on the phone much). But when we got together I'd spend
1 1/2 to sometimes 3 hrs there because I really loved, and liked her. We shared a lot of good stuff. Missed her.
My dad got nasty during his 2nd and even meaner from 3rd major depression so I didn't visit him as often. Though when his memory started going (from complex set of events) he at some point forgot what ever unresolved issues from his early traumatric life with both of his parents - he became very sweet again. Then I visited more.
Previous to that my mom (in her ?mid 30's) had gotten very sick with asthma when I was 5 1/2 which turned part of my childhood topsy turvi for the first few years until it was better controlled, but it was still still like egg shells when any of us her, my dad, my sis or I got a cold she could catch.
Then got even better re th asthma when I was in my late teens - but also previous to that and after had a few acute, scary, one terrifying time along with then very rare asthma scares which meant an ER trip.
When she started really extra improving my dad started having severe depression problems.
I really felt I couldn't caltch that much of a break (a couple of years w/o any problems), and that was before they started getting old 70+, and new problems. I spent way more time being in the ER, and hospital visiting than your average tween, teen, young adult.
I don't think all nursing homes, and hospice places are scams. There are serious number of bad NHs, though, at least in the past, and unfortunately many still around.
Meowmee
(5,164 posts)And it would be a pittance compared to what you really need for someone you are caring for who became a complete invalid like my father after the hospital infected him with covid eventually leading to his murder. Here you will be bankrupted by these scam artists if you need to go on medicaid to get care and it can not be at home. If you have not set up a protected trust in advance.
Unfortunately every agency we dealt with were scams and or incompetent/ negligent and many also were criminals. The first hospital and supposed sub acute care gave him stage 3 pressure sores which turned into stage 4 under their supposed home care. Neglect and abuse is rampant, and that was one of the lesser things that happened if you can believe it.
I was trying to set up hospice at one point and found out they would be paid huge sums of money per week by medicare but would do absolutely pretty much nothing to help. No guarantee they would be available when you really needed them or at all. The only care provided would be someone to give a bath once per week. Basically they were just dropping off opiates, if they did that, and other than that you are on your own. Many bad reviews and the coordinator said that happened to her cousin as well.
I am sorry you went through all of that at such a young age.
electric_blue68
(14,623 posts)times, and very bad care! I'm sorry you both endured that.
I see what you mean about the pay being a pittance under very intense cases
I had heard stories waaaay before my parents were ever at that necessity. So we were concerned!
And thank you for your kind words.
Meowmee
(5,164 posts)We all went through it. He would be alive if we had never come here or I had sent him back to Canada. Everyone had better prepare for this if you plan to stay in the us. Get ltc ins while you are young if you can. Make a living trust with an eldercare attorney to protect your assets. It is only going to get worse. Who knows if medicare and ss will still exist in time.
niyad
(112,438 posts)onecaliberal
(32,489 posts)I also work full time. The level of stress in both places is off the chart. There is no space without stress for me.
XanaDUer2
(10,327 posts)Stress is awful. I'm constantly stressed, too. It's wearying
shrike3
(3,283 posts)Raine
(30,540 posts)who had dementia. It was the hardest thing I've ever done but I miss my father so much and would do it again in an instant.
DUgosh
(3,052 posts)I cared for him for 20 years, then both of my parents, and partners mother, all passed peacefully. Now my partner and I both have chronic pain and mobility issues and Im exhausted - Im only 63.
Kaleva
(36,147 posts)littlemissmartypants
(22,418 posts)Hekate
(90,202 posts)highplainsdem
(48,731 posts)caregiving, including some years when I averaged about 5 hours of sleep a night, and some shorter periods when it was more like 3 hours a night.
And that can take a toll.
But the good news is that diet, supplements and exercise - and relaxation techniques including yoga and visualization - can repair health and stop or even reverse aging.
I discovered health food stores, books on nutrition, and yoga, when I was in my 20s, and they helped enough that I was still getting carded in my 40s, even when younger friends with me weren't getting carded. (And yes, you can still drink if you're into health foods.) I take prescriptions when necessary, but typically go years between needing any. (Twelve years now since my last prescription.)
Being in good shape helped me deal with the stress of caregiving.
And the information I'd found helped even more. Anyone you're caring for is likely to do better with a good diet, the right supplements, and relaxation techniques. And while not all doctors are openminded about anything outside allopathic medicine, some are. My mom's GP and cardiologist both approved a long list of supplements for her even when she was hospitalized, a list that sometimes shocked new doctors and nurses. I showed her doctors which books and research made which supplements a good idea, if they weren't already familiar with it. You might discover, as I did, that while doctors aren't likely to recommend supplements on their own, they're often aware of them and fine with patients taking them, even glad they were asked about supplements so they can okay them.
There's a lot of good information on health out there. Also a lot of garbage, and you have to be able to weed it out.
But it's worth it.
Doctors are invaluable. Allopathic medicine is invaluable. Prescriptions are invaluable, when needed.
But none of them can substitute for taking care of yourself.
And when you take care of yourself, you can get benefits at any age. No one should ever give up and settle for not being healthy. You can always do something, on your own, to improve your health.
And if the info helps you take care of a loved one better, that's a huge bonus for a caregiver.
cilla4progress
(24,589 posts)what you all have done, and I'm not sure I would want someone to sacrifice themself for me? And especially not resent it? Even though it's no one's fault.
I'm fortunate at 67 this has not been my lot in life, so far. And so, I guess, are my family and beloveds!
Is it that it gives you purpose?
And of course - love.
highplainsdem
(48,731 posts)If I could have afforded to pay professional caregivers 24/7 instead, I would have.
But when a loved one needs care and no one else in the family can provide that care, and there's no care facility that can provide appropriate care, you just do it.
Because they're loved ones.
oasis
(49,152 posts)TrogL
(32,818 posts)With Craftygal being as sick as she is, and needing the care she does, I'm constantly stressed and not getting contiguous sleep. That's gotta be hard on the genes.
leighbythesea2
(1,200 posts)Was to make a joke about myself.
Caregive mom with Alzheimer's.
Was working contractually in one house, w her with me.
My husbands sons both were diagnosed with aspergers. One more severe.
He essentially single parents them, in our other house.
The states were each house is, are neighboring states at least.
According to my math, we should be retired at the very least.
7wo7rees
(5,128 posts)She has dementia/alz.
We both recognize it is killing us.
Yeah, yoga is good, self help and all. It's still killing us.
You can't fight an 85 year old person insisting on having a space heater when it is 70 degrees outside.
We need more support. And mom retired after x # of years working for the IRS, internal affairs.
Ms 7wo7rees
And much love to all the others out there living through this!!
highplainsdem
(48,731 posts)Sympathies on the fight over the indoor temp. My mom wanted 80 degrees indoors. I had to run a fan, sometimes two, while washing dishes by hand. And with all her food needing pureed, there were a lot of dishes. I have several blenders and food processors, needed for the days I couldn't get around to the dishes till she was asleep.
And yes, caregivers need more support. But it can be tricky sometimes to get expert enough care. Even when my mom was in a good nursing home toward the end of her life, I had to be there several hours a day because they really didn't know how to deal with the rare swallowing disorder she had.
7wo7rees
(5,128 posts)My mother's husband died in a nursing home in 2015, a few months later her mother died in her home that she left to her, that was only a mile from her home.
Family dysfunctions and all, we only became involved round about year later.
Taking care of parent with issues will shorten your life.
No question.
shrike3
(3,283 posts)She's young and healthy, but it was very hard on her.
Kaleva
(36,147 posts)Caring for my wife while trying to earn a living as my own health problems (which began before I met my wife) made being able to work increasingly difficult was doing a number on me.
I finally applied for disability and was approved in 3 months. This allowed me to care for my wife full time.
Hortensis
(58,785 posts)It was a giant problem in 2016 when Hillary campaigned on helping caregivers, as well as other family-oriented actions. That's an of-course given her lifelong work for the wellbeing of women, children, and families.
In 2018, 820,000 people were on state waiting lists for Medicaids home- and community-based services, and of course many states, mostly red, don't provide those services.
Here's Biden's cargiving plan: https://joebiden.com/caregiving/
He planned $400B to greatly expand the Medicaid services. Extremely unfortunately, needed funding was excluded from the BIF, and now it's hijacked with the BBB.
November 8's practically roaring toward us. Let's send some more Democratic senators to DC.
niyad
(112,438 posts)Last edited Sat Jan 15, 2022, 02:05 PM - Edit history (1)
Plans. One would think that in the richest, bestest, most wonderfulest country in the world, that of course caregiving would be a priority.
Hortensis
(58,785 posts)increasingly at risk of finding themselves trapped in that role!
Many are spending their older years caring for elderly relatives, and then finding themselves elderly without care, often having depleted their resources in caring for loved ones.
Vote, vote, vote, especially women. The vast majority are women.
shrike3
(3,283 posts)mainer
(12,013 posts)We don't want to burden them, and we will do everything in our power to arrange this ourselves when the time comes.
shrike3
(3,283 posts)When it's time.
shrike3
(3,283 posts)Three years later, she was dead, and Mom was alive and well.
A friend of a friend is taking care of her mother, and is starting to get some respite, has found caregivers who will help and give her a break. She's a vibrant woman who loves her mother dearly, but I'm glad she's getting help for that very reason.
Emile
(21,912 posts)from truck driving at 62.
madville
(7,397 posts)It certainly doesnt apply to every scenario but I know many elderly and chronically ill people that would consider it if it was legally available here in FL, would also help make it more socially acceptable as well. My 98 year old grandma is in assisted living and all she talks about mostly is wanting to die.
Someone should get a ballot initiative together for that here now that I think about it, gonna look into that, see if any groups are working on it.