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Thtwudbeme

(7,737 posts)
Sat Sep 10, 2022, 08:40 AM Sep 2022

Go Fund Me's on DU- a dystopian nightmare

I fully support and understand GFM's...the ones that break my heart the most are the ones for funerals. How awful.

GFM has essentially become a populist welfare website in a cruel society that has very little social support. As a YA librarian, this looks very much like a dystopian nightmare- are we to put our needs in an organized space and fight for survival?

I urge everyone here to look carefully at the GFM's they choose to support. We- as Dems- tend to have soft hearts, and are therefore willing to support everyone in need. It is what makes the Dem party awesome, and on the other side of that sword, also makes us targets for misuse.

When you look at a GFM page, try to do some background search: Look for obituaries, "Google" the people that have posted it. Many times you can find them on Linkedin, Instagram, etc.

I am NOT suggesting that you "dox" anyone, nor am i stating in any way whom you should donate to. I personally could not care less what you choose to do. IF you repsond "I can donate however I want" I will cut and paste this paragraph and think silently, "this is an idiot that cannot read, and I hope I don't meet them in person."

Be careful on the internet folks- there are scammers and grifters everywhere at this point.

25 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
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Go Fund Me's on DU- a dystopian nightmare (Original Post) Thtwudbeme Sep 2022 OP
This message was self-deleted by its author Tetrachloride Sep 2022 #1
Sounds good. Donate however you like. Thtwudbeme Sep 2022 #2
Someone can just mail me the PS5 directly Sympthsical Sep 2022 #3
I have no idea what a PS5 is Thtwudbeme Sep 2022 #4
They're making a joke about having a GFM Xavier Breath Sep 2022 #18
There are clearly people in need Sympthsical Sep 2022 #24
I rarely donate unless I know the person radical noodle Sep 2022 #5
That's a good idea. Thtwudbeme Sep 2022 #6
There should be a Zoom panel interview dalton99a Sep 2022 #7
I doubt any organization has time to do that. The infrastructure has surpassed Thtwudbeme Sep 2022 #8
Good PSA...nt Wounded Bear Sep 2022 #9
Thank you. I hope people think before they donate Thtwudbeme Sep 2022 #10
Post removed Post removed Sep 2022 #11
Well, that's entirely true--- but I hope to keep this thread separate from that one Thtwudbeme Sep 2022 #12
Been there myself... 2naSalit Sep 2022 #13
This message was self-deleted by its author Thtwudbeme Sep 2022 #15
Funeral Donations modrepub Sep 2022 #14
absolutely Thtwudbeme Sep 2022 #16
+1. Many such obits include a GFM link dalton99a Sep 2022 #17
A two-year-old client of mine and her mother were killed in a car accident. phylny Sep 2022 #19
That is awful. I am so sorry. Thtwudbeme Sep 2022 #20
It really was horrific. phylny Sep 2022 #21
:( I don't either Thtwudbeme Sep 2022 #22
Maybe I'll put one up demtenjeep Sep 2022 #23
Kick nt XanaDUer2 Sep 2022 #25

Response to Thtwudbeme (Original post)

 

Thtwudbeme

(7,737 posts)
2. Sounds good. Donate however you like.
Sat Sep 10, 2022, 08:55 AM
Sep 2022

I really don't care anymore than I care about who buys what at Target.

Xavier Breath

(3,528 posts)
18. They're making a joke about having a GFM
Sat Sep 10, 2022, 10:37 AM
Sep 2022

to acquire a free PlayStation 5. They run north of $600, from what I can tell. So, in reality, many would probably need a GFM to legally get one.

Yes, it's a sad state that it's come to people having to beg in the public square for help with medical (and subsequently, funeral expenses).

Sympthsical

(8,935 posts)
24. There are clearly people in need
Sat Sep 10, 2022, 11:50 AM
Sep 2022

However, without any kind of verification, it's hard to say. We never know what's going with strangers on social media. We generally only see a small sliver that they are allowing others to see.

I've never glommed onto GFM or solicitations for it. I help friends and family where I know their circumstances. Outside of that, I only give to smaller charities where I know absolutely where my money is going.

GFM just seems . . . very exploitable.

 

Thtwudbeme

(7,737 posts)
8. I doubt any organization has time to do that. The infrastructure has surpassed
Sat Sep 10, 2022, 09:24 AM
Sep 2022

the ability of the people to do that.

Just be careful on GFM's.

Response to Thtwudbeme (Original post)

 

Thtwudbeme

(7,737 posts)
12. Well, that's entirely true--- but I hope to keep this thread separate from that one
Sat Sep 10, 2022, 09:40 AM
Sep 2022

I think ALL GFM threads need to be evaluated for certain criteria at this point.

Again, I would never- ever think to tell someone how to spend their money. I don't give a rat's behind.

That said, I have heard from another DUer that is in serious need that s/he did not want to post a GFM because they feel like there are grifters here. This DUer has never put up a GFM before- and is in dire straights.

2naSalit

(86,059 posts)
13. Been there myself...
Sat Sep 10, 2022, 09:49 AM
Sep 2022

Back when I had to live in my car for almost a year. Yet, if I were already acquainted with someone, I might donate if I had the cash which isn't often since I'm on SSDI myself. And I don't mind one-timers for the most part but I never asked for help here because I don't care to see it here though I understand the level of desperation and evaluation one goes through in deciding to do so.

I get what you are saying in your OP and I agree. There are too many scammers out there anymore and some are very convincing.

I'm hoping the individual I referenced will be prohibited from continuing their habit of seeking DU funders for what seems to be their regular income. I thought I would add my two cents on that one recurring asker as an example of what some of the scamming might look like.

Response to 2naSalit (Reply #13)

modrepub

(3,469 posts)
14. Funeral Donations
Sat Sep 10, 2022, 10:14 AM
Sep 2022

A lot of funeral homes will post on a person's obit that they are seeking donations to offset the costs. Consider checking your local funeral home if you want to donate and help the less unfortunate. I suspect a lot of funeral homes will do basic services for those in need and eat the cost. I'd think there'd be less of a grift chance working through them than GFM.

 

Thtwudbeme

(7,737 posts)
16. absolutely
Sat Sep 10, 2022, 10:21 AM
Sep 2022

I agree. It's horrific to see a family just trying to bury a loved one with no money.

What a state the US is in.

phylny

(8,353 posts)
19. A two-year-old client of mine and her mother were killed in a car accident.
Sat Sep 10, 2022, 10:46 AM
Sep 2022

I donated money, without being asked, directly to the funeral home to offset costs. What a tragedy.

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