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CatWoman

(79,861 posts)
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 07:14 AM Nov 28

I have a friend i've known for over 40 years and i keep evading his phone calls

prior to the election whenever we talked he kept denigrating Joe Biden.

no matter what I said, or explained about the good Biden did for this country it went in one ear and out the other.

he's a vet like me. we first met while i was on active duty serving in the Military District of Washington.

i explained that Biden did me a world of good when he waived VA fees/co pays during the pandemic. at that time I was suffering with my second bout of macular degeneration and the co pays were thru the roof.

i also explained how my mortgage payment keeps increasing due to the Trump tax cuts as my property taxes exploded beyond reason.

all of my arguments were met with "Biden is old". "Biden is feeble."

Never mind that Biden brought this country back from the brink of disaster. Never mind that inflation in this country is far below that of our allies and other countries. Never mind that Biden's economic policies have overwhelmingly helped America and our jobless rate is top notch in comparison to that of what he inherited from Trump.

I got so sick of that shit.

then he kept sending me videos of Judge Joe Brown denigrating Kamala Harris. My response was who the fuck is Joe Brown and why should i care what he says about anything? Joe Brown isn't a policy maker. Joe Brown isn't even an elected official. He's a bitter naysayer who makes You Tube videos attacking both Harris and Obama. why the fuck should I take his opinions with any credibility?

I'm just sick of trying to reason with people who have no reason.


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I have a friend i've known for over 40 years and i keep evading his phone calls (Original Post) CatWoman Nov 28 OP
Happy Thanksgiving 🦃 underpants Nov 28 #1
Judge Joe Brown?? Wiz Imp Nov 28 #9
These shows are cheap and popular. Judge Judy dominated ratings in major markets underpants Nov 28 #18
I understand that. What I don't understand is those that on several of them, the judges were horrible people. Wiz Imp Nov 28 #24
He's probably just focused on his taxes. underpants Nov 28 #30
I think white racists like Black people who affirm racism. yardwork Nov 28 #26
The y love it! Only reason Larry Elder is on talk radio Demovictory9 Nov 28 #29
Yes. They have that one use. dchill Nov 28 #33
I'd guess the same principle also applies to misogyny whathehell Nov 28 #38
I have cut them from my life. BonnieJW Nov 28 #21
My two cents: you should continue to shun him. n/t Mister Ed Nov 28 #2
Sometimes toxic people have to be excised from our lives. It's hard, but it's allegorical oracle Nov 28 #17
Doesn't sound like OP is shunning him. Kaleva Nov 28 #22
Tell him he got what he wanted wryter2000 Nov 28 #50
These people with the "Biden is old and feeble" shit. Diamond_Dog Nov 28 #3
Exactly. The excuses have worn thin. paleotn Nov 28 #34
I know plenty of smart people who voted for Trump. Elessar Zappa Nov 28 #57
Anecdotal. You don't know everyone who voted paleotn Nov 28 #58
I'm not saying there's not a lot of idiot Trump supporters. Elessar Zappa Nov 28 #73
Not to mention that voting for a fascist is in and of itself a fucking stupid act. Karasu Nov 29 #80
Inexcusable!!! ailsagirl Nov 28 #72
Of course! Elessar Zappa Nov 28 #74
Either those who voted for him are incredibly stupid... ailsagirl Nov 28 #78
I think it's both, the uncritical mind is open to brainwash stupidity . arthritisR_US Nov 29 #79
In their minds it is 1980s and he's looking good. travelingthrulife Nov 28 #43
remember when Trump donned that ridiculous sanitation outfit CatWoman Nov 28 #75
How have your mortgage payments increased because of the tax cuts? Callie1979 Nov 28 #4
Mortgage payments are not always fixed - TBF Nov 28 #49
I know escrow pmts will vary but I thought ARMs bit the dust after the '08 mess! Callie1979 Nov 28 #63
Hate Weaponized Kid Berwyn Nov 28 #5
As a vet, maybe you should redirect your friend to the overwhelming... Hugin Nov 28 #6
I weeded most of them out before the election. Woodwizard Nov 28 #7
You can either be the puppet or the puppet master Kaleva Nov 28 #8
It doesn't sound indigoth Nov 28 #10
At this point, don't play defense. Go on the offensive againt Trump. Martin Eden Nov 28 #11
The racism is a deal breaker for me. RandiFan1290 Nov 28 #12
im shunning all maggots except some of the older ladies samnsara Nov 28 #13
Sounds like your friend needs some tough love Raven123 Nov 28 #14
Stop engaging... 2naSalit Nov 28 #15
I agree Kaleva Nov 28 #20
Call blocker AverageOldGuy Nov 28 #16
Block him. You don't need that kind of negativity in your life. Let him try to convince some other sucker. ratchiweenie Nov 28 #19
You can't reason with stupid people. Emile Nov 28 #23
The Trump supporters are lost souls Septua Nov 28 #25
Haters gonna hate, hate, hate... OMGWTF Nov 28 #68
I have a friend like that, known him since second grade, almost 60 years. bluesbassman Nov 28 #27
You can't reason someone out of an opinion Joe Nation Nov 28 #28
Attempting to debate with a true believer is just arguing Kaleva Nov 28 #39
Rightwing media has been pushing the idea that all Dems are evil baby-killers for 40 years LymphocyteLover Nov 28 #31
I look at relationships like the limbs of trees... maspaha Nov 28 #32
He doesn't care about your feelings. Baitball Blogger Nov 28 #35
Right there with you... orwell Nov 28 #36
Sadly, he's been what I call, voluntarily brainwashed. Joinfortmill Nov 28 #37
Strong people lift others up. Weak people try to cut others down. usonian Nov 28 #40
I had a friend of 54 years that turned into a Luz Nov 28 #41
A serious statesman with decades of experience vs a reality TV show host with a felony conviction. CrispyQ Nov 28 #42
Why has it taken eight years? HereForTheParty Nov 28 #44
He's toxic. You are better off without that right now. Human have only so much fighting capacity. CousinIT Nov 28 #45
Judge Joe Brown -- regional loon cadoman Nov 28 #46
You cannot win the hearts and minds of people who repeatedly prove they are in possession of neither. Efilroft Sul Nov 28 #47
My question Rebl2 Nov 28 #48
as i said in my OP CatWoman Nov 28 #77
I refuse to interact with MAGAts. Martin68 Nov 28 #51
At least you've got us Maeve Nov 28 #52
I understand. I have a similar situation. Its hard having a rational conversation with people that consume RW garbage tulipsandroses Nov 28 #53
To me, its simple - if this person won't honor a request to not talk politics and to quit sending u political material nmmi Nov 28 #54
Fuck him. Happy Thanksgiving. cactusfractal Nov 28 #55
Block his number and if there are any attempts to contact you through other channels say "I can't talk right now. Please NBachers Nov 28 #56
This is why he loves Trump. keithbvadu2 Nov 28 #59
It's hard but sometimes we have to acknowledge that former friends are incapable of reality. Thanks to Rush, Fox, etc. Evolve Dammit Nov 28 #60
We each have only a finite number of hours in our life. LastLiberal in PalmSprings Nov 28 #61
The Awful Ugly brainwashed Mases.. who let it happen. Cha Nov 28 #62
NEVER speak to him again. NameAlreadyTaken Nov 28 #64
Eh, some friend, eh? Someone that is constantly trying to push crap into your face is truly NOT a friend. SWBTATTReg Nov 28 #65
MAGAs won't change DownriverDem Nov 28 #66
I have a super rw aunt. "I'm not a racist, but..." stollen Nov 28 #67
Time to cut ties with this person, and stop communicating sakabatou Nov 28 #69
you need to copy this post Skittles Nov 28 #70
He's taking up space in your head and not paying rent The Wizard Nov 28 #71
The scariest part is that more & more people Dark n Stormy Knight Nov 28 #76

underpants

(188,472 posts)
1. Happy Thanksgiving 🦃
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 07:19 AM
Nov 28

I’m sorry you have to worry about this. I’ve avoided having to deal with a victory lap. We are going to my folks today. I’m hoping they (especially my stepfather) are going to be gracious. He sees Trump for what he is now from what I understand so we’ll see.

Wiz Imp

(3,501 posts)
9. Judge Joe Brown??
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 07:54 AM
Nov 28

I used to work with someone who really like his show so I decided to watch it a couple times to see if I could understand what my coworker saw. What I saw was the most pathetic awful "court" show I've ever seen before or since. I can't even describe how bad it was. Brown himself came across as a super hateful bigot against black people (Yes, I'm aware he is black himself). He treated all black people on the show like shit and made references that made it clear he considered them all criminals. He showed he had either Zero understanding of the law or zero respect for it. He clearly ruled in the cases based on his personal impressions of the people and not the law. It really was sickening how horrible of an individual he came across as.

To this day, I still don't understand what my coworker saw in the show. And this was someone I really liked and agreed with on the vast majority of things.

So obviously, anything Brown said about anything would be worth less than nothing in my opinion. In fact I might go further to say, if he was attacking something or someone (like Kamala Harris) then that thing or person is probably the exact opposite of what he said.

underpants

(188,472 posts)
18. These shows are cheap and popular. Judge Judy dominated ratings in major markets
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 08:41 AM
Nov 28

going head to head with Oprah as well as Rosie and Ellen at their peaks. Doubled them in ratings in some markets.

You are basically paying for the one talent. All other costs are just normal production costs. The participants get paid scale and verdicts (minimal) are paid by the production company.

Wiz Imp

(3,501 posts)
24. I understand that. What I don't understand is those that on several of them, the judges were horrible people.
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 09:15 AM
Nov 28

I include Judge Judy in that category. I especially never understood how any liberal or progressive could enjoy watching her show. She treated people like shit and didn't even follow the law even though the point of the show was supposed to be people getting sound legal decisions.

Anyway, as bad as Judge Judy was, Judge Joe Brown was a million times worse. I found out that Brown said Donald Trump was definitely not racist but Joe Biden was a horrible racist. "opinions" like that make me think he has a mental problem. It definitely shows he was a black man who was racist against other black people. He blamed single black mothers as the biggest cause of problems in society. On top of his racism, he was outrageously homophobic as well. I've rarely seen or heard anti-LGBTQ language from anyone as bad as things I've heard or read him say.

The man is one of the most vile abhorrent persons to ever appear regularly on TV. The fact the some people "liked" his show and others apparently lauded his "opinion" of Kamala Harris is beyond despicable.

yardwork

(65,394 posts)
26. I think white racists like Black people who affirm racism.
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 09:20 AM
Nov 28

The white racists say, "See! This guy agrees! And he's Black!"

whathehell

(30,021 posts)
38. I'd guess the same principle also applies to misogyny
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 10:13 AM
Nov 28

The male misogynists say "See!..This person agrees, and they're female"!

BonnieJW

(2,713 posts)
21. I have cut them from my life.
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 09:00 AM
Nov 28

Fortunately, none are relatives. I will not socialize with anyone who voted to end America.

allegorical oracle

(3,965 posts)
17. Sometimes toxic people have to be excised from our lives. It's hard, but it's
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 08:39 AM
Nov 28

for your own mental health. Happy Thanksgiving.

Diamond_Dog

(35,793 posts)
3. These people with the "Biden is old and feeble" shit.
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 07:29 AM
Nov 28

Last edited Thu Nov 28, 2024, 11:57 AM - Edit history (1)

Have they seen their orange Lord and Master lately? Biden’s mind runs rings around whatever is left of Trump’s. Plus he looks like death warmed over.

paleotn

(19,858 posts)
34. Exactly. The excuses have worn thin.
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 09:52 AM
Nov 28

We all know it's because they hate smart people, brown people, any people they can hate to feel better about themselves. With their simple brains, they think they can run things far better than those "egg heads." Trump is their champion because he's just like them. Dunning Kruger on steroids. People who just can't grasp the fact that they don't know much and feel put upon to default to those who do.

These are the people who forever have spouted uninformed, unworkable and downright nutty ideas and solutions to real problems. Their simple thinking is very binary, cartoonish and unnuanced. They're all giddy now because for once they think their kind, along with assorted psychopaths, get to run the big machine.

In a world where little is simple and nuance rules, that's damn dangerous. Best we can hope for is their ineptitude cripples their ability to do much and any impacts bite quick, hard, but cause no permanent damage. Bite enough to get the squishy middle to wake up and think...gee, that was dumb. The far left tail doesn't have enough self awareness for that, so short of them going back to pursuits more fitting their intellect, we simply have to out vote them.

A pity we couldn't just pull up the ladder in 2021 when it came to suffrage. Repukes don't think voting is a right anyway, so take them up on that. Suffrage should be based on mental capacity. Centuries past, property was an analog for good sense, among other things. Imperfect but the best they had. Today, we have far better tools for determining if we can risk giving someone the vote. Whether or not we can trust them with the responsibility of making complex decisions in a rational manner. The Founders spent a good amount of time arguing this exact problem.

Elessar Zappa

(16,295 posts)
57. I know plenty of smart people who voted for Trump.
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 01:12 PM
Nov 28

It’s not about intelligence. It’s about being too lazy to check whether or not the sources one reads or listens to are valid. It’s about not letting cruelty dominate your decision making.

paleotn

(19,858 posts)
58. Anecdotal. You don't know everyone who voted
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 01:18 PM
Nov 28

And not checking sources is a sign of lower intelligence. Unless one is a psychopath. You might want to check them for that.

Elessar Zappa

(16,295 posts)
73. I'm not saying there's not a lot of idiot Trump supporters.
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 08:24 PM
Nov 28

I’m just saying that there’s quite a few “smart” people who voted for him too, whether because of racism, greed, or something else.

Karasu

(530 posts)
80. Not to mention that voting for a fascist is in and of itself a fucking stupid act.
Fri Nov 29, 2024, 01:04 AM
Nov 29

Last edited Fri Nov 29, 2024, 01:35 AM - Edit history (1)

Frankly, intelligence has everything to do with it, especially in a post-factual society where it's more important than ever to be able to distinguish reality from propaganda. Statistics have consistently shown that intelligence and education are the single-most reliable indicators of political affiliation in this country.

CatWoman

(79,861 posts)
75. remember when Trump donned that ridiculous sanitation outfit
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 09:25 PM
Nov 28

and had extreme difficulty getting into the garbage truck?

i called him and wanted to know if there was anything "feeble" about that.

i got crickets. he hadn't seen it.

i sent him the you tube video.

again, crickets.

Callie1979

(522 posts)
4. How have your mortgage payments increased because of the tax cuts?
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 07:39 AM
Nov 28

Your mortgage should be a fixed payment there term of the loan.
And property taxes are your county's responsibility. Go to their meetings when they propose an increase. We've done it in my county & its made a difference. Property values are up so the valuation are also up. But that doesnt mean taxes should increase by the same amount. This year our millage rate was lowered so our increase is about 12$ per 100k value.

If you dont want to throw away this friendship completely think of a shared interest you have and call HIM. Bring up THAT topic and talk about it. Thats what I've done with mostly success. Where I am, FAR more people are trump voters. If I cut ALL of them out of my life I'll be cutting MY LIFE & I'm not willing to do that. BUT I'd say 90% of them dont talk politics much; they're the "I've always been a republican" types. Sports & kids & the stock market are topics. When it does come up, I try to change the subject. Or point out Matt Gaetz is a predator!

TBF

(35,000 posts)
49. Mortgage payments are not always fixed -
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 11:41 AM
Nov 28

some are arm mortages (we have that on our home). Our mortgage went up year before last, down last year, but I expect it will rise again this January because property insurance rates in TX are insane due to the constant storms.

Anyway, here's a basic starter and then you could find more on it if you're interested: https://www.bankrate.com/mortgages/arm-vs-fixed-rate/

Callie1979

(522 posts)
63. I know escrow pmts will vary but I thought ARMs bit the dust after the '08 mess!
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 03:15 PM
Nov 28

They've never been a good idea. Even so, they would've adjusted upward due to interest rate increases not tax cuts.

Kid Berwyn

(19,062 posts)
5. Hate Weaponized
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 07:41 AM
Nov 28

Your friend’s mind has been programmed to hate. Spaces once filled with curiosity and wonder now are taken up by evil libel and disinformation. Thanks, Putin and the GQP.

Hugin

(35,413 posts)
6. As a vet, maybe you should redirect your friend to the overwhelming...
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 07:47 AM
Nov 28

Sentiment of all Trumpians that any service member is a “sucker and loser”. Upheld by Trump’s stooge Tuberville (where is he lately?) doing his bidding by blocking officer promotions for a year and a half out of nothing other than unAmerican spite.

Woodwizard

(1,111 posts)
7. I weeded most of them out before the election.
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 07:49 AM
Nov 28

I just can not justify a friendship after Jan 6 that solidly is maga.

You can have issues in politics but maga took it to a level that is unprecedented.

Just the ignorance of climate change and science not even getting into the socioeconomic issues is a deal breaker for me.

Kaleva

(38,891 posts)
8. You can either be the puppet or the puppet master
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 07:54 AM
Nov 28

Right now, he's controlling you.

Be the puppet master and tell him if he makes any mention of politics in the future, you'll cut him out of your life . If course, this means you don't bring it up either.

You describe him as being a friend so there must be more to your relationship with him then what you described. Possibly this is just a minor annoyance that he does on occasion?

Martin Eden

(13,775 posts)
11. At this point, don't play defense. Go on the offensive againt Trump.
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 08:06 AM
Nov 28

If your friend has any respect for the US Constitution and the American ideals for which so many military service members sacrificed so much, I'm sure you can make the case with numerous facts and quotes from Trump in his own words that Trump spits on those who sacrificed and is a treasonous criminal who threatens to turn America into the kind of authoritarian state we've fought against.

If he tries to deflect or "whatabout" Biden and Harris, cut him off and continue the barrage against Trump. There is no shortage of ammunition.

Ultimately, he should not want to discuss politics with you. Perhaps you can resume your friendship on other terms.

RandiFan1290

(6,476 posts)
12. The racism is a deal breaker for me.
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 08:13 AM
Nov 28

I've never met a con that wasn't racist and they LOVE to let you know.
Unfortunately, many find it easy to ignore but not this kid.

Raven123

(6,316 posts)
14. Sounds like your friend needs some tough love
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 08:28 AM
Nov 28

Seems he is addicted to hate. My understanding of the condition is that addicts will sacrifice much, if not all, to satisfy their need. In your case it seems he is sacrificing your friendship. He has made his choice. Maybe it is time for him to get his fix elsewhere..

2naSalit

(95,081 posts)
15. Stop engaging...
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 08:32 AM
Nov 28

And block his number. If he confronts you in another realm, tell him you lost interest in his ranting about negative shit and until he finds other things to talk about, you have no need to waste your time on him and his BS.

Be honest with the guy, if you do answer a call, open with that and end the call. You don't need to listen to his crap and you could tell him that you have cut off all magats and since he's one, you're done with him. He does this to be mean and you should see it as such and refuse to allow it into your space.

That's my 2 cents.

Forget him and enjoy Thanksgiving.

AverageOldGuy

(2,445 posts)
16. Call blocker
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 08:36 AM
Nov 28

You can get an app for your smart phone and a device for your landline that are call blockers. Install the app and/or the device, put his number in, and tell the app/device to block. When he calls ur phone may ring one time then it hangs up.

ratchiweenie

(8,027 posts)
19. Block him. You don't need that kind of negativity in your life. Let him try to convince some other sucker.
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 08:45 AM
Nov 28

He's about to find out what his boy is really all about.

Septua

(2,707 posts)
25. The Trump supporters are lost souls
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 09:18 AM
Nov 28

I had a "discussion" recently with a MAGA type that went south quickly and confirmed what I already knew about the MAGA mindset. The individual was parroting all the catchphrases you hear on FOX. Where did Biden get his money, what did Harris do as Vice President. He brought up the Afghanistan withdrawal and the 13 people killed. He's convinced the 2020 election was rigged. He asked if I was better off under Biden than Trump...

At one point I asked what news station he watched...Fox and CNN but he doesn't like CNN and mentioned Rachel Maddow (MSNBC) was a screwball. (?)

I don't know what they have against Democrats but they refuse to listen to any arguments against Trump. They listen to what they want to hear...

bluesbassman

(20,071 posts)
27. I have a friend like that, known him since second grade, almost 60 years.
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 09:31 AM
Nov 28

We grew up together in Northern California and after reaching adulthood drifted apart as people do, but kept in touch. About ten years ago I relocated to Texas and he relocated to Idaho. I guess he thought me moving to Texas meant I was on the same wavelength as him with his move to Idaho because along with pictures of the grandkids and scenery he started sending increasingly rightwing stuff. Funny things at first that I never acknowledged, but it got progressively worse and finally I responded and told him “look, I’m not sure if you’re aware of it but I’m quite Liberal. You and I have never had political conversations before, but if you want to do it in a mutually respectful way I’m more than willing. In the meantime, do not send me any more cartoons or right wing propaganda.” He honored my request and I haven’t received any more nonsense from him. However, it did change my view of our relationship and that’s ok. At least I know where he stands and can act or not accordingly.

Joe Nation

(1,047 posts)
28. You can't reason someone out of an opinion
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 09:33 AM
Nov 28

that they didn't reason themselves into.

In other words, using reason, even sound reason, to persuade someone is useless because it wasn't reason that brought them to the point they find themselves.

Try using the same gaslighting techniques that worked on them in the first place. It's not like they are going to fact check you since they didn't fact check the nonsense they are currently spewing. What do you have to lose? Just have fun.

LymphocyteLover

(7,258 posts)
31. Rightwing media has been pushing the idea that all Dems are evil baby-killers for 40 years
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 09:42 AM
Nov 28

it's hard to reason with anyone who's willingly soaked that up for years

maspaha

(425 posts)
32. I look at relationships like the limbs of trees...
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 09:46 AM
Nov 28

…sometimes ya gotta prune them back to keep the tree healthy. I’ve personally been pruning my relationships with friends & family because I need to stay mentally, emotionally, and physically strong and healthy to face the “find out” phase of FAFO…even though I did not F-around to begin with.

Take care of yourself and know your emotional limitations. It might not always be like this, but for now, I’m very cautious.

Joinfortmill

(17,139 posts)
37. Sadly, he's been what I call, voluntarily brainwashed.
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 10:03 AM
Nov 28

We each need to make our own personal decisions about how we handle the crisis we are in. My daughter and SIL have a 'no politics' rule when socializing with their friends. At least one voted for Trump.

I have no use for anyone who voted for him this time around. He's an ajdudicated sexual assaulter and fraudster. He's a proven prolific liar, and it seems clear he is subservient to Putin. I believe he is a traitor to the country he took an oath to serve and that the U S. Intelligence and the Intelligence of our allies have proof of his treason. We'll probably never know for sure.
Maybe you could adopt my daughter's policy of 'no politics'. Or, mine which is be polite and move on. Or, just tell him to give you a call when he's been deprogramned.

I'm not making light of this. We are in a difficult time. But, keep this in mind, they know who he is and how he acts, and they like it.
On another note, I was just diagnosed with wet AMD in my left eye. Doing the eye-jab routine.
Take care and sincerely, thank you for your service


usonian

(15,718 posts)
40. Strong people lift others up. Weak people try to cut others down.
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 10:17 AM
Nov 28

Be strong. Enjoy this extended family of caring and compassionate people.

Fly some FAFO flags.
https://www.democraticunderground.com/100219770873

Turn some magazines in the grocery checkout backwards and cover them with Pokemon Monthly.

https://www.democraticunderground.com/100219770814

Lend a hand to a friend in need.



And make spaghetti and meatballs now and then.



Love makes life richer.



Bitterness makes one's life a living hell.



And it attracts destructive energy.

Luz

(815 posts)
41. I had a friend of 54 years that turned into a
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 10:18 AM
Nov 28

trumper. She really was my friend and confidante until she became consumed with rw hate.
I was with be while her sister fought cancer and sadly lost.

She cried to me many times about her sisters medical bills (and her own) while I agreed she shouldn't have to go broke and argued that we needed national healthcare among many other things (my friend had her safe, legal abortion when she wanted it).
I voted to help her and her sister.
She voted to hurt me and MY sister.
Fuck her.

CrispyQ

(38,997 posts)
42. A serious statesman with decades of experience vs a reality TV show host with a felony conviction.
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 10:18 AM
Nov 28

It boggles the mind, doesn't it?

We're a shallow country that likes show more than substance & our declining educational standards don't help. I remember many, many years ago catching a segment of The Jerry Springer Show & I was aghast that anyone would watch that crap much less think it was entertainment. WTF? Turns out, a shit ton of Americans not only like it, they believe it. A lot of factors helped put Trump in the White House but I'll always believe that without The Apprentice he would never have come down that escalator.

HereForTheParty

(590 posts)
44. Why has it taken eight years?
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 10:35 AM
Nov 28

Did he support Trump in 2016 and 2020?

It strikes me that people are talking about severing relationships after Trump won in 2024. He's been around a long time.

CousinIT

(10,875 posts)
45. He's toxic. You are better off without that right now. Human have only so much fighting capacity.
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 11:12 AM
Nov 28

Right now, we need all our energy (emotional and otherwise) to fight against the looming authoritarianism, economic and governmental destruction which is about to befall an ignorant electorate which voted for the destruction of its own house while we are all still living in it.

There can't be any or much energy left for toxic emotional vampires.

I for one would not blame you for cutting off contact with him. It's sad because you have a 40 year history and you are both vets and served together. But he did this, you didn't. He obviously voted for Trump, and this is what HE chose. So let him live with it.

cadoman

(1,060 posts)
46. Judge Joe Brown -- regional loon
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 11:16 AM
Nov 28

With some MAGAT friends and family they reach the point it's better not to talk to them.

Maybe after a year of hyperinflation due to tariffs and absence of immigrant labor to pick our crops and build our homes, they'll be more receptive...

Efilroft Sul

(3,841 posts)
47. You cannot win the hearts and minds of people who repeatedly prove they are in possession of neither.
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 11:20 AM
Nov 28

This guy sounds like he's full of weapons-grade cruelty waiting to punch down on others and malignant stupidity that harms the rest of us. Cut him loose.

CatWoman

(79,861 posts)
77. as i said in my OP
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 11:16 PM
Nov 28

our friendship has lasted over 40 years.

I was friends with his parents.

His mom died of dementia; his father from bone cancer. I was there for him before and after their deaths.

I loved his pets just like they were mine. Especially his out of control lunatic cat.

We had mutual friends as well. I was friendly with his girlfriends.

Whenever i had field duty he babysat for me.

Maeve

(43,107 posts)
52. At least you've got us
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 12:02 PM
Nov 28

Have a good holiday season (Macy's Santa just appeared, so the season is official) and know you have other friends that aren't a$$holes

tulipsandroses

(6,702 posts)
53. I understand. I have a similar situation. Its hard having a rational conversation with people that consume RW garbage
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 12:31 PM
Nov 28

I've always known that my friend was on the conservative side, prone to believing conspiracy theories. He was a "9/11 truther" in the age of Bush. At one point he believed some of the nutty sovereign citizen nonsense.

Despite his nutty beliefs, we've always had a good friendship. Friends in common, we are both huge sports fans and spent many good times watching our favorite teams. So lots of good memories there. We have both supported each other in difficult times in the past. When his mom passed away after kidney failure and efforts to get a donor kidney failed, I was there for him. Likewise, he was there for me during some difficult times.

Despite him being more conservative, he used to be open to reason. Not anymore. I got him to change his mind about marriage equality. He understood rational arguments about the legal issues of marriage equality. This was pre RW social media.
He can no longer be reasoned with. Youtube has rotted his brain.
I no longer spend time trying to convince him that his beliefs are nonsense RW propaganda. Not worth my mental health. I don't know if our friendship survives. I've avoided his calls since the election. Spoke to him once after the election and he called me an elite. Mind boggling. We grew up in the same neighborhood. I said, really, 3 billionaires, including the world's richest man bought the election, but somehow I am elite? Then he went into bothsiderisms.
Haven't spoken to him since that time.

The only advice I can give is to stop trying to reason with folks like this. Its futile. There is no reasoning. Facts no longer matter.

nmmi

(248 posts)
54. To me, its simple - if this person won't honor a request to not talk politics and to quit sending u political material
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 12:42 PM
Nov 28

then this person is inarguably not a friend.

 

cactusfractal

(578 posts)
55. Fuck him. Happy Thanksgiving.
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 12:49 PM
Nov 28

It's time these fucking users realized that our tolerance has limits.

They call because they want to "put our friendship above politics"?

Let them eat static.

NBachers

(18,287 posts)
56. Block his number and if there are any attempts to contact you through other channels say "I can't talk right now. Please
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 01:05 PM
Nov 28

don't contact me again."

No excuses needed; no attempts to "one-up" with reasons. Just make it stop. Over. Finished.

keithbvadu2

(40,915 posts)
59. This is why he loves Trump.
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 01:51 PM
Nov 28

Trump belittles the Medal of Honor to praise his Presidential Medal of Freedom.
Trump calls those who sacrificed their lives for our county suckers and losers
Trump ridicules all POWs with his 'captured' comment.
Trump desecrated Arlington National Cemetery for a cheap campaign photo shoot.
Trump said 'Happy Memorial Day' to the Japanese military which killed many, many thousands of our soldiers.

Evolve Dammit

(19,827 posts)
60. It's hard but sometimes we have to acknowledge that former friends are incapable of reality. Thanks to Rush, Fox, etc.
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 02:04 PM
Nov 28

Their brainwashing was effective, largely based on ideological, total bullshit.
Hope you have a good Thanksgiving in any case, and thanks for your service.

61. We each have only a finite number of hours in our life.
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 02:31 PM
Nov 28

Every minute arguing with a person who is proud of his ignorance is a minute that could be spent doing something that makes you feel happy or fulfilled or appreciated. Even watching "Wizard of Oz" for the eleventeenth time is more productive than wasting a minute trying to reason with someone who believes in "alternate facts."

"Never wrestle with a pig because you'll both get dirty and the pig likes it." - George Bernard Shaw

When I first met my sister-in-law I discovered she had "political Tourette's." We would be having a nice conversation and all of a sudden she would go off on "goddam tree-huggers," Obama, etc. The first time she did it I ignored her, but the second time I said, "I would like to have a good relationship with you for my wife's sake, but I want you to know I will never argue politics. Just know that my political views on nearly everything are 180 degrees from yours. Do not interpret my silence as agreement. There are so many worthwhile topics we can discuss, but if you insist on bringing politics into every conversation I will not visit you again. Your sister can make her own decision."

She quickly learned that any political statement she made was met with silence from my wife and me. After a while she stopped doing it, and we have had a good relationship.

BTW, I learned the "withdraw attention" technique at Seaworld. Whenever the Orcas (killer whales) would start acting up all of the trainers would just walk off the stage. After a minute or so the whales would realize that they had misbehaved and they stopped. Only then would the trainers return and resume the show.

Surprisingly, the same technique worked with the middle school students when I was substitute teaching.

SWBTATTReg

(24,747 posts)
65. Eh, some friend, eh? Someone that is constantly trying to push crap into your face is truly NOT a friend.
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 03:19 PM
Nov 28

I think you're doing the right thing, to ignore them, no longer deal w/ them.

Some people need to grow up and not act in such a childish manner like he is.

And you're right, I could care the least about supposedly 'Judge' joe brown. I thought judges were to be impartial and respective of both sides, knocking these two major democratic candidates is not the thing to do.

And, there really is no reasoning w/ these people...they don't listen to common sense or anything else that is truly for the better, and thus, they'll walk themselves into that big ol' mess that tRUMP has prepared for them and unfortunately everybody else.

DownriverDem

(6,735 posts)
66. MAGAs won't change
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 03:30 PM
Nov 28

either. Their leader after saying on election night that the country must unite, issued his Thanksgiving message full of hate for liberals. It's going to be a long and painful 4 years.

stollen

(690 posts)
67. I have a super rw aunt. "I'm not a racist, but..."
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 03:59 PM
Nov 28

After living overseas for 3 decades, we retired and moved to the states, visiting her on our trek to find a home. She was very bitter about the 2020 election....hostile. When we'd tried to reason with her, she said if someone doesn't like the US, to move....back overseas? We'd just arrived!

After this election, I wrote her a newsy email.
I congratulated her on the Trump win with the caveat that I am concerned that my husband outranks Trump's DoD nominee and has more experience. I also said we were going back overseas, for a year or longer, to relax and enjoy our ole stomping grounds. She never responded.

We leave in Feb. My dog is coming. The planning has helped take the stress off. I can't go through this "Trump thing" again, to include dealing with anyone who is out of their fucking mind.

Dark n Stormy Knight

(10,152 posts)
76. The scariest part is that more & more people
Thu Nov 28, 2024, 10:05 PM
Nov 28

seem to be rejecting logical thinking skills and the requirements of a valid argument. It's like a very high stakes game with one side rejecting all rules and the refs ignoring it, but enforcing the rules against the other side.

I just can't see how we can make them see the problem. They are perfectly convinced that their complete misses are slam-dunks and why not? The scorekeeper keeps awarding them more points!

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