Biden Scores 800 Feet Of Copper Wire
Calling it a “major-ass haul” that would provide “some much-needed scratch,” Vice President Joe Biden reportedly scored over 800 feet of copper wire from a foreclosed home in the D.C. suburbs, White House sources confirmed Thursday.
Biden, who is admittedly “flat fucking broke” from throwing numerous “ragin’ keggers” over the last nine months, recently devised the plan to strip copper wiring around the Washington, D.C. area after hearing that there was a thriving black market for the ductile metal.
“There’s tons of dough in copper wire if you’ve got the know-how,” the vice president was overheard telling a White House official, explaining that he learned the hard way that swiping manhole covers wasn’t worth the hassle. “As Lady Luck always says, moving copper ain’t easy. But if you play the metal game right, you’re looking at something like a two- to three-grand payday for a night’s worth of work.”
“At this point, I’m just looking for a dealer who won’t dick me over,” Biden added. “It’s tough finding a trustworthy metal theft ring. Some of the guys in this biz can be real pieces of shit.”
http://www.theonion.com/articles/biden-scores-800-feet-of-copper-wire,31013/
made ya look
= new reply since forum marked as read
And he'll cite The Onion as a highly regarded credible source too.
Quite a bit of wire stolen, and nearly all the copper plumbing..
Good bit of work to fix it up, but as a second year home owner I'm pretty happy to already have nearly 100k in equity.
Guess I should thank Biden! 
