One Year Ago Today, America’s Profit-Driven Health Care System Killed my Only Son (NSFW)

[riqster]

Last edited Tue Jun 25, 2013, 10:23 PM - Edit history (1)

http://bluntandcranky.wordpress.com/2013/06/25/one-year-ago-today-americas-profit-driven-health-care-system-killed-my-only-son-asterisk-free-post/

Lots of profanity, so I didn't post a snip. Today is the first anniversary of my son's death, and I am hugely pissed off.

UPDATE, 10:22 PM ET: I got a lot of feedback on other sites for being so confrontational and not "respecting" the points of view of those who favor the "free market" system. So I wrote this follow-up post:

"For those who were offended by today’s post:
Put yourself in my position. If your child were dead and I advocated policies that had killed your child, what would you say to me?

I am betting you’d be throwing F-bombs right back at me. And I’d have it coming.

Mr. Blunt and Cranky"

[Scuba]

1. Well-aimed profanity. Thanks riqster.

[riqster]

11. Thank you.

[Borchkins]

2. Thinking of you today.

I'm sorry for your loss and for everyone else who will go through what you're going through. (I'd type more, but my eyes are leaking.)

B

[riqster]

10. Thanks.

If this knocks the scales off a few eyes and advances the evolution of our health care system, it will be a consolation.

[Gidney N Cloyd]

3. K&R

[TRoN33]

4. I am sorry for your loss.

As a father of two young sons, I cannot fathom how difficult you has went through. Its so wrong for the health insurances to play being the gods with people's lives in their hands for the sake of more profits. I'm sorry.

[riqster]

13. Thanks, and all the best to you and your boys.

[area51]

5. I'm so sorry for your loss.

[riqster]

14. Thank you.

[riverbendviewgal]

6. I feel your pain

As a mother who lost her son to a brain tumour almost 14 years ago. It eill be there forever.My son
was given every chance and treatment in my not for profit health care system. You have every right to feel anger because your son was denied treatment in the USA for profit health system. It so inhumane. The USA is NOT the greatest country in the world.

[riqster]

9. My condolences.

I am glad that your son was well-cared for while he was with you.

[Dustlawyer]

7. On December 21st will be the 20th anniversary of the negligent homicide/malpractice that killed

my son Joshua! The insurance company tried twice to cancel the policy (Josh had Cystic Fibrosis and they knew it would be expensive. URISA was written by industry so the only risk to their behavior would be they would have to still honor the policy and pay my attorneys fees if they lost. We spent most of his life uninsured b/c of this and had to rely on government aid for his care. The doctors over prescribed the enzymes that digests his food saying that it doesn't hurt him to take more than normal amount to help his digestion instead of figuring out why it took so much. The enzymes ate a hole in his intestine causing sepsis and death. But I forget, we have the best medical care in the world, right?

[riqster]

8. Hugs to you.

No one should ever have to bury their own kids.

[Dustlawyer]

87. Thank you! My son's cousin was born a week after him and he also has CYstic Fibrosis.

His doctors immediately installed a port that he could be fed through his belly button. He later became the Louisiana state champion in his weight class in wrestling. My sons doctors never suspected that a whole lot of digestive enzymes would eat away his colon. It's real hard to find doctors who give a shit. I feel this man's pain and I know that more time will help, but that is the only thing. I was a basket case for 2 years. My wife blamed herself and changed to orthodox Judism and a vegan. We divorced a couple of years after. That is a time in my life that I would love to forget. I better stop here bc it is bringing up things that are better left to the past. Thanks again!

[mountain grammy]

12. Only for the Dick Cheneys of the world..

He gets the best medical care in the world.. our children, not so much. Many times I'm ashamed of my country.. this is one of them.

[riqster]

33. *1 nt

[sabrina 1]

70. I am so sorry. I can't imagine the pain!

[mountain grammy]

15. I'm pissed off right with you. We are disgraced as a nation for the death of your son

and so many other cruel and needless deaths.

[riqster]

18. Thank you.

[OneGrassRoot]

16. I'll add another "FUCK YOU"...

to all those who perpetuate and profit from this greedy system.

I am so damn sorry, riqster.



K&R

[riqster]

17. Thanks.

[midnight]

19. K&R Most of us could afford single payer...

And a big F.U. to those executives that get health care while at the same time causing your son not to get his.

[riqster]

24. Yes, we need single payer

The ACA was a good first step.

[Half-Century Man]

20. No real grey area....

...a well focused effort, sir.

Our current healthcare system provides the general population of the country with quality healthcare the same way Portuguese three masted carracks provides the shipping industry with quality ocean going transportation.

[riqster]

25. A very good analogy.

Thank you.

[Half-Century Man]

45. Obscure sailing vessel references...

...some has to do it.

[heaven05]

21. wow

Amerikkka is based on greed and profit and we're the greatest nation on earth? This one situation proves, to me, it's not! No reason for this. GREED! GREED! GREED! It will cause the death of us all.

[riqster]

27. No argument there.

[mtasselin]

22. one

We once upon a time number 1 in the world on so many good things, but not so much any more. Greed is destroying America, unless you are a millionaire you are one serious illness away from being totally destroyed, everything that you have worked for gone so greed can win out, my wife says she is at a point where she is starting to hate this once great country, but she is holding out hope that the people will come to their senses and start righting so many wrongs.

[riqster]

28. Even the millionaires are vulnerable

...they are just too thick to realize it.

[cate94]

23. I am so sorry for your loss.

I am sorry for what you have been through, and the pain that you still carry with you.

And I agree with your sentiment.

Fuck them.

[riqster]

29. Thanks.

[kestrel91316]

26. I didn't realize Mr B&C was YOU. So sorry about your loss.

[riqster]

30. Yes, that is my blog

Allows me to reach a wider audience than DU.

Thanks for the kind words.

[kestrel91316]

56. You are awesome, and you say things that I am thinking but don't dare say myself.

[riqster]

57. Thank you.

I appreciate the feedback

[daisy1957]

31. My sister also died from denial of care.

She died in September 2010 of lung cancer. The hospital kept delaying chemo until they could get a response on Medicaid. Medicaid was slow. The cancer wasn't.

[riqster]

32. Oh Hell Daisy, I am sorry.

[blue neen]

34. I am so sorry for your loss.

The loss of a child is the ultimate in unfairness. To have that compounded by health insurers, well, it must be very hard trying to cope.

I just went through 3 surgeries in 9 months---one left to go. The things I've learned about our disgraceful health care system in that time would fill a book. Let's just say I'm extremely lucky to still be here.

I just started reading your blog. It's excellent. Here's wishing you well as you travel through this painful day.

[riqster]

37. Thanks, and good luck to you

I too have been fucked by insurers, and that makes me angry (I expect you have felt similar emotions).

The death of my son puts me in a rage. Quite primordial, we are wired to protect our young.

[IdaBriggs]

35. I cannot even imagine....

I am so sorry for your loss.

Would you mind sharing the details of what happened?

[riqster]

41. Thank you.

My son was born with a condition that required constant care and management. I was able to get him insurance throughout his life, but it was a constant battle with insurers and their cookie-pushers who questioned the decisions of his doctors and denied care pending “reviews”. I had to act as his advocate during these times, and unlike the biblical tale, David does not always beat Goliath. In fact, I hardly ever won.

And this was with an insider’s knowledge of health care and hospital finance, mind you. Someone without that information would have been even worse off than my son and I.

In the last year of his life, we were in a constant crisis mode, and the insurer continually dragged their feet, retroactively denied care, interfered, and fucked things up. One example of many: he awoke from a coma and was discharged within 6 hours. Yes, you read that right.

Shortly after that discharge, he had one medical crisis too many and we lost him. And we lost him not because we were “uninformed consumers”, not because we didn’t have a support network, not because we weren’t willing to pony up cash when necessary: no, he died because the insurer prioritized their balance sheet over the life of one of their insured.

[IdaBriggs]

49. Speechless! SIX HOURS???? WTF???

- and I am not even his mother!!!

I am so sorry for your loss; you and your son are testaments to why "for profit" health care / insurance is simply a crazy way of taking care of our citizens.



May I ask if you have ever considered doing a "YouTube" video telling your family's story? It may be one way of honoring his memory / helping to make a difference for the next people. Today - one year after your loss - would be a GREAT day to begin such a story....in my head, it would open with a picture of him, and you talking in the background about who he was, and how much you miss him....



I am so sorry -- your story just breaks my heart, and makes me SO ANGRY!!!

It also inspires me to "get back to work" on my personal passion project....

Thank you for sharing....

:HUG:

[riqster]

50. Interesting thought

I have a "face made for the recording studio", so have not considered a you tube approach.

[blue neen]

60. Well, my gosh, you had insurance that you dared to USE!

That's when they start doing all of the things you described...when you're spending THEIR money. THEIR money. Like you get all of this for free.

You didn't want to use insurance; you wanted your son to be healthy. How do insurance companies show their "compassion"? By stepping in and making an already difficult life an absolute living hell.

They scrutinize everything at that point, down to the prescriptions that cost $1.29. It's horrible.

Everyone is outraged about loss of privacy and no respect for civil rights. Heck, the insurance companies perfected that long before anyone even noticed.

Peace. You deserve it.

[riqster]

61. Thank you

Good points in your post.

[ReRe]

36. K&R

I don't have emoticons, but I'm giving you a big hug right now. Insurance didn't used to be like this. I'd say about 25-30 years ago is when the greed took over, and gradually got worse over time. It sucks and we should go to universal healthcare for everyone. So so sorry you lost your son. Here's another huuuuuuuuug.

[riqster]

39. Thanks, and the same to you.

[Jarla]

38. I am so sorry for your loss

And I am angry that your son and so many others were denied care at the cost of their lives.

The people who fret about "death panels" in a socialized health system need to wake up. That's what our corporate insurers already are.

[riqster]

40. ^^^This^^^

"The people who fret about "death panels" in a socialized health system need to wake up. That's what our corporate insurers already are."

[BlancheSplanchnik]

74. absolutely. The death panels are here *now*.

And those same death panels help sponsor the propaganda that teaches teapukes everything they know.

I am speechless with rage at what happened, riqster, so so sad please continue use your activism as a mission for your son's sake.

[prairierose]

42. I am sorry for your loss Rigster....

I know how you feel. Aug. will be the 8th anniversary of my brother's death. When people ask me about it, I tell them he died because he was an American and our for profit healthcare industrial complex does not care about people who do not have insurance. Even with insurance, so many are denied the care they need; either because they can not afford to go to a Dr. to be diagnosed in a timely manner or because an insurance company flat out denies them care. Either way, our system kills many thousands every year but no one talks about it.

ACA may be a good beginning but there are still thousands of people dying every year for the sake of profit in this country.



BTW, I like your blog.

[riqster]

46. Thank you for the kind words

And my condolences on your loss.

Yes, the ACA was a good first step, and bless the Prexy for that step. But we aren't at the end of the road yet.

[RainDog]

43. hugs to you

so sorry for your loss.

[riqster]

47. Thank you

[peace13]

44. I send you love and energy.

May time heal what can be healed. May even a small ray of peace grace your heart today knowing that you have done your best to honor him. I am so sorry for your loss. Peace and love, Kim

[riqster]

48. Thank you Kim.

[LittleBlue]

51. So sorry for your loss

Wherever your son is, it's a better place than here.

[riqster]

53. I am sure of it.

Thank you.

[johnnyreb]

52. First, do no harm.

Our healthcare-denial-for-profit system is a murderous scam. Bless you riqster.

Physicians for a National Health Program
...private insurance bureaucracy and paperwork consume one-third (31 percent) of every health care dollar. Streamlining payment through a single nonprofit payer would save more than $400 billion per year, enough to provide comprehensive, high-quality coverage for all Americans.
http://www.pnhp.org/

[riqster]

54. Insurers do not have to abide by Hippocrates

And they make all too many of the decisions on our health care.

Thank you for the kind words,

[KansDem]

55. Peace to you, riqster...

[font size="1"]From too much love of living,
From hope and fear set free,
We thank with brief thanksgiving
Whatever gods may be
That no man lives forever,
That dead men rise up never;
That even the weariest river
Winds somewhere safe to sea.
Charles Swinburne. (1837–1909)

[riqster]

59. And upon you. peace.

Here's the quote that sustains me in this time:

Look round our world; behold the chain of love
Combining all below and all above.
See plastic Nature working to this end,
The single atoms each to other tend,
Attract, attracted to, the next in place,
Form'd and impell'd its neighbour to embrace.
See matter next, with various life endued,
Press to one centre still, the gen'ral good;
See dying vegetables life sustain,
See life dissolving vegetate again.
All forms that perish other forms supply
(By turns we catch the vital breath, and die),
Like bubbles on the sea of Matter borne,
They rise, they break, and to that sea return.
Nothing is foreign; parts relate to whole;
One all-extending, all-preserving, soul
Connects each being, greatest with the least;
Made beast in aid of man, and man of beast;
All serv'd all serving: nothing stands alone;
The chain holds on, and where it ends unknown.

(Alexander Pope, Epistle on the Nature and State of Man)

[KamaAina]

58. Worthy of Ashley Morris himself!

the late New Orleans blogger who served as an inspiration for the John Goodman character in HBO's Treme. His signature phrase "Fuck you, you fucking fucks!", or just FYYFF, definitely applies here.

http://www.aoltv.com/2010/06/12/meet-ashley-morris-the-real-creighton-bernette-from-treme/

[Brigid]

62. If this isn't the time for profanity, and plenty of it . . .

I'm sure I don't know what would be. That leaky eye thing seems to be catching . . .

Hugs to you, riqster.

[riqster]

63. Thank you Brigid nt

[one_voice]

64. I'm so very sorry for...

your loss! Money over life, it's so unbelievably fucked up!

A big fuck you to those responsible!

I hope you are able to find some peace eventually!

[riqster]

65. Me, too. I find some solace in activism.

Thanks.

[Warren Stupidity]

66. Du is broken: I can only rec this once!

[riqster]

68. Thank you.

[freshwest]

67. Riqster, private insurers also destroyed my family. Totally. Fuck them.

The heartbreak never ends, the humiliation and the pain no one knows. If the ACA, imperfect as it is, had been in force, things would not have played out the way that they did. That's why I support the ACA for future generations.

The knowledge it didn't have to be this way, and trying to pick up the pieces, which are no longer within our grasp are all that remains. There is no recourse for me and mine. Or you and your son.

I send my tears to you on the anniversary of your loss of your only child today.

[riqster]

69. Sorry for your pain

[freshwest]

72. And yours. Thanks.

[pnwmom]

84. I'm so sorry, freshwest.

Countless families like yours are why I support the ACA. I'd rather have single payer, but real families can't wait any longer, and the ACA will help.

[Puglover]

71. I am so sorry.

It sounds very trite but I do know what loss is. Your life changes forever.

Righteous rant.

[riqster]

77. Thank you.

[Ilsa]

73. I am so sorry for your loss, and

For the senselessness of it. There is no reason one person should have to die to make someone else richer.

[riqster]

78. Thank you.

[Scarsdale]

75. One year ago today = =

My son was 45, laid off from a job he had worked at for 12 years. To keep his insurance, it cost around $600 a month, which he could not afford along with regular bills. He became sick, lost weight, could not eat. He would not accept my offers to see a doctor because he said "He will send me for lots of tests and I can not afford it" He kept hoping to be called back from layoff, but he wasn't. He weighed 136# at 6'2" when my other son found him at his house, passed away. Nothing can heal the pain of losing a child, no matter what age. I get upset when these worthless bastards in DC refuse to help ordinary people, while WE pay for their health insurance. Time to stop it, plus their pensions. Let them get 401K's like regular people.

[riqster]

79. +1

I am sorry for your loss.

[Warpy]

76. DU is a site for grownups, tolerant of well deserved profanity

so allow me:

"Simply put, if you are in favor of a health care system that is purely based on greed and profit (as America’s is and has been), then you are in favor of people dying so millionaires can get even richer. And yes, Fuck You for that."

I am so sorry the fuckers killed your son. I don't know how anyone can recover from that.

I went without health insurance from 1987 on to this year, when Medicare kicked in. I hopped around on a broken ankle for three days waiting for an urgent care to open up because I couldn't afford the $1000 for walking into an ER. I blew off a C7 fracture partly because it didn't hurt that much more than normal (although I had mild neuro deficits from it) but mostly because I couldn't afford to get it fixed.

The system of health care in this country designed by Nixon, then Reagan, and then MBA weasels who wanted to wring the last dime of profit out of the sick is criminal. There is just no other word that fits it.

Were it up to me, the upper management of all health care outfits would be in prison. It's not up to me, so they'll all retire in pleasure palaces in the Caribbean and die in feather beds.

And I hate every one of them. And I blame them the most for that.

[riqster]

80. Agree with your post

And that sucks, what you had to deal with.

[Warpy]

82. Nowhere near what you have had to endure.

[Stargazer99]

81. My daughter died for the same reason

She worked but could not receive enough pay to cover the everyday bills and pay the doctor. She would have lived if she had received care. I feel your anger, to say I'm pissed off at this country is an understatement.

If you have money you can live, frankly the middleclass doesn't give damn, it will be their turn next

[riqster]

93. I am sorry for your loss.

[pnwmom]

83. I am so sorry, riqster. I know there is no bigger loss.

[riqster]

92. Thank you.

[Just Saying]

85. I'm so sorry.

Sending good thoughts.

The swearing is more than appropriate. Our healthcare system is broken and just a disgrace.

[riqster]

94. Thanks for the kind words

[LongTomH]

86. I want to send good thoughts and positive energy to all the people on this thread who lost loved....

.....ones because of this evil, wicked, heartless, for profit 'health care' system.

I'm not that religious in any formal way; but, I can only say: God have mercy upon this country. God forgive us all for allowing this!

[riqster]

95. Thank you. And Amen.

[SunSeeker]

88. I wish you peace and strength, riqster.

[riqster]

96. Thank you. So much.

[Arugula Latte]

89. I'm sickened by the priorities of this country.

Military-Industrial Complex - 100 points. People - 0.

My condolences to you and your family.

[riqster]

97. Indeed.

Thank you.

[rurallib]

90. I hope ( and believe) some good will come from this.

So sorry you paid such a great price, but I can only hope his death will be a catalyst to fix this insane system.
I wish you peace.
thank you for sharing this terrible situation.

[riqster]

98. Thanks. That same hope is why I wrote it.

[tpsbmam]

91. I so sorry, riqster. Damn, sometimes I hate this country.....

and too often these days it's due to healthcare, or the lack thereof for regular folks.

My heart breaks for you and anyone whose child dies, but most particularly when it didn't need to happen and pure USA greed and a nightmarish "healthcare" system for most of us is the cause.

Hugs for you and all on this thread who share your tragic loss -- to see so many in this space speaks volumes about how shameful the "healthcare" system is.....and how uncaring.

[riqster]

99. Agreed. I am proud, though, of the strength

Of others who have shared their stories. It gives me something to aspire to.

[riqster]

100. Thanks to everyone for their support and good wishes

Especially those who shared their tragedies. That, friends, is courage. Bless you all.

[DissidentVoice]

101. Your loss is America's shame

God bless you. I would have probably used MORE F-bombs!

The fact that a price is put on people's lives as a salable commodity is forever our shame in this country.

[riqster]

104. Makes you wonder how far we really have come

...from the days of peons and bond servants.

[DissidentVoice]

109. I'm not so sure we have.

The practice of putting a profit-motive value on who lives or dies is disturbingly close to the way other human beings were regarded as chattel not so long ago in our history.

[riqster]

110. Yep.

The choice was between a car elevator (or such) for some rich fuck, and my son's life.

We can see their priorities by the outcome.

[jimlup]

102. I'm feeling for you riqster

I have kids and know of what you speak. Hang tough! We can't save your son but we can fight for justice.

[riqster]

103. Exactly. Thanks.

[idwiyo]

105. Hugs.

[riqster]

107. Thanks.

[Enthusiast]

106. Very sorry about the loss of your son.

I agree, entirely, with your take on the insurance industry and health care system. Asshole fucks, every one.

The profiteers want to preserve this piratical system against all reason.

This is why we see things like the supreme court's changes to the voting rights act. It's as if we are under attack on all fronts. Well, it isn't "as if", we actually are under attack.

We watched it unfold during the TV debates on health care reform when Teabagger operatives dominated the staged discussions. And we were not even allowed to discuss the merits of a single payer system. So we can clearly see that the media is fully complicit. Another thing we need to recognize is that third way Democrats were also complicit. It was "Democrat" Max Baucus that would not allow a discussion of the merits of single payer.

Advocates of single payer were arrested while Teabagger actors were indulged all the way.

All according to plan. Mission accomplished.

[riqster]

108. ^^^THIS^^^

"It's as if we are under attack on all fronts. Well, it isn't "as if", we actually are under attack."

S'truth.