General Discussion
Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region Forumswhy is it so hard for some people to
believe that men and women can have platonic relationships?
Link Speed
(650 posts)my GF will never get it.
1000words
(7,051 posts)liberal_at_heart
(12,081 posts)CFLDem
(2,083 posts)the vast vast majority of the time, at least with one-on-one interaction. Most people just don't have the discipline to overcome biology.
kestrel91316
(51,666 posts)We aren't all ruled by our hormones, and women don't have a "little head" to listen to and screw up because of.
CFLDem
(2,083 posts)We aren't all ruled by hormones. But the vast majority are given the right circumstances.
Congrats if you can pull it off. It's a very rare quality.
kestrel91316
(51,666 posts)told me that the way you know that a man wants an intimate relationship is because he has come up to you and started a conversation, I scoffed at first. But it certainly would explain a lot, and now I sort of regret if I missed what must have been HUNDREDS of potential suitors over the decades because I didn't recognize it as "flirting".
cynatnite
(31,011 posts)I can't count the numerous friendships I've had with men that didn't involve sex. I would imagine you had plenty of friends of the opposite sex over the years and that didn't end up in bed.
People have platonic relationships with the opposite sex all the time.
You're assuming that people aren't able to control their sex drive. Nonsense.
DesertFlower
(11,649 posts)42 years. he had female friends and i had male friends. most times we knew the person. he would tell me about a woman at work and say "you've got to meet her -- you'd really like her" in which case i would say "let's have her over for dinner". same with my male friends. many times we became friends with both the man and his wife.
i've been friends with a guy since '84. i'm 72. he's 55. he's like my little brother. and yes, he met my husband several times. came to stay with us back about 10 years ago.
hubby passed away 5/12 and michael is my emotional support. we talk every week for at least an hour -- sometimes longer. he came out to stay with me in april. because i watch tv and record in my bedroom we watched tv at night on my bed along with my cat. i've never thought about him in a sexual way and i doubt he's thought about me that way. back when AIDS was an epidemic i asked him if he was being careful. he took out his wallet and showed me the imprint of a condom.
someone recently asked me if i ever thought about michael in a sexual way. i said "no", but my answer should have been "do you have a sister -- have you ever thought about having sex with your sister"?
i don't know what i'd do without my friend howie. he's my massage therapist. when my husband got sick he said "make me a list of everything john does and i'll take care of it". and he has. packed up all of john's clothes -- got his cars sold, etc. he fixes things around the house for me. and yes he's married to a wonderful woman who i like. sometimes the 3 of us go out to dinner, but many times it's just howie and me because his wife is a nurse and is "on call" a lot. i was invited to their house last xmas but couldn't go because i was grieving so much -- couldn't stop crying. i did go there for easter and will be going for thanksgiving.
CFLDem
(2,083 posts)that platonic opposite sex relationships are common. Men and women hang out in group scenarios all the time with no sexual tension.
It is the one-on-one scenario where that is usually not the case. In one-on-one cases that are platonic, it's usually because the guy has been friendzoned.
JVS
(61,935 posts)Chan790
(20,176 posts)As I put it to my girlfriend one day:
You know why I'm willing to hold your hand in public? To rub it in that they're not me.
liberal_at_heart
(12,081 posts)and whether or not they are in a long term, committed, happy relationship.
liberal_at_heart
(12,081 posts)had to tell him, "be careful with that one. She will come on to you." I have good intuition. He will come back later and so, "You were so right. I was so oblivious to it, but you were right." He doesn't stay friends with those women.