How to look smarter - Andy Borowitz has the answer (and it’s pretty simple)

[Mira]

NEW YORK (The Borowitz Report) – A new study released Tuesday indicates that wearing glasses does not make a person look smarter, but standing next to Texas Governor Rick Perry does.

In the study, when participants were shown photos of a person with and without glasses, they registered little or no change in their view of the person’s intelligence.

However, when the photo of the same person was juxtaposed with a photo of Governor Perry, participants suddenly said that the person looked “much smarter” or “brilliant,” with some participants even using the phrase “like a genius.”

According to Davis Logsdon, who conducted the survey for the University of Minnesota, the results could be a game changer in the strategies people use to look smarter. “For people trying to appear more intelligent, it turns out that the must-have accessory is not glasses; it’s Rick Perry,” he said.



www.borowitzreport.com

[Ilsa]

1. Especially if they are wearing a t-shirt

Proclaiming "I'm with Stupid. -->"

[immoderate]

2. Oh yeah? I'd like to see what he does for Louis Gohmert.

And it wouldn't be Perry's fault.

--imm

[rurallib]

7. or Palin - fercryingoutloud youknowwhatimean

[AlbertCat]

10. Perry - Gomert - Palin

The intense gravity of the combined stupid would rupture the fabric of space/time and the entire universe would turn inside out.

[calimary]

15. I'm surprised louie gohmert's head is still convex.

Nature abhors a vacuum, after all. With the atmospheric pressure at sea level being greater than a vacuum (about 15 pounds per square inch), I'm surprised his head doesn't crush inward til it's about a half-inch wide.

[Half-Century Man]

16. One more time; It not a complete vacuum.

A vacuum is defined as: a space void of atoms.

Gohmert's head contains Idiotridium (Atomic Weight 666; densest material known). The eleven atoms drifting listlessly in that hollow gourd of his head would feel bad if you ignored their presence.

[calimary]

17. GOOD one!

EXCELLENT! I stand corrected. He actually DOES have a few atoms stumbling around in that gaping hole behind his eyeballs and ears and under all that skin covering the top of his head. It's not a total vacuum. Those eleven atoms DO count.

[Half-Century Man]

18. Yes they count...and frequently lose their place at 34.

then start over, and over, and over, and over.

[longship]

3. BOROWITZ!!!

Damn! Sometimes he just gets it. (Well, just about all the time, actually.)

R&

[sarge43]

4. Honorary DUzy. nt

[Spitfire of ATJ]

5. I guess I'm not the only one who noticed his glasses have no lens effect.

[Mr.Bill]

6. Perry and Gohmert

would both look smarter if they STFU.

[Ino]

8. Hahaha!

That first line made me LMAO!

[Dustlawyer]

9. Perry should ask for his Donor's money back that he paid the image consultants!

Also, if he wants to get some of the pot vote, he has to do more than say he thinks it should be decriminalized, he has to actually DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT!!!

[BootinUp]

11. OMG this is genious comedy level.

[The Wizard]

12. Those glasses

The Palinator wears are plain glass, and have been since she had her eyes surgically corrected. She wants to give the impression that she actually reads.

[Solly Mack]

13. Hehehehehehe

[Iwillnevergiveup]

14. We can thank Andy Borowitz

for being relentless. Love his mythical "researchers."