Why So Many People Care So Much About Others' Sex Lives

[xchrom]

http://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2014/07/why-we-care-about-other-peoples-sex-lives/374781/

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Here’s a loaded question: Is casual sex immoral?

From Hester Prynne to Hobby Lobby, from our dorm-mates to our politicians, it’s an issue that’s sparked more than its fair share of fiery public debate (after all, we Americans are a judge-y people). A recent study done by researchers at Cornell and New York University summed it up this way: Casual sex is psychologically good for you if you if think it’s acceptable, but not if you don’t.

So the answer, clearly, depends on who’s being asked—but odds are that either way, they won’t feel tepid about it.

Your answer may depend, at least in part, on where your money comes from (if you’re a woman) or where it goes (if you’re a man). At least, that’s the argument of a paper recently published in The Archives of Sexual Behavior, which found that promiscuity—by both men and women—is more likely to be considered a moral violation in places where women are economically dependent on men.

[msanthrope]

1. "Puritanism. The haunting fear that someone, somewhere, may be happy." - H. L. Mencken nt

[NRaleighLiberal]

15. seems like that line has been hijacked by today's GOP!

[Laelth]

2. Interesting thesis. Thanks for posting. n/t

-Laelth

[Sunlei]

3. because a huge number of Americans watch 'fantasy' porn everyday, even at work & school.

IMO, that's why some people are so obsessed about others.

We should tax the hell out of porn at the consumer level, a very high tax. Make some good state and federal revenue off that legal obsession.

[Tetris_Iguana]

4. You so know porn is generally free

and user generated, right?

Seriously, this worries me....

[daleanime]

26. That no one is profiting....

from some one else's pleasure?

[Tetris_Iguana]

27. No one but the website that hosts it.

And google.

[AngryAmish]

6. Wouldn't that violate the 1st Amendment?

Not viewpoint neutral. Tax some pictures, not others.

[Action_Patrol]

12. What?

This is an insane viewpoint. What exactly do you want to tax?

[bhikkhu]

13. I think you're mixing up cause and effect

People are obsessed with the sex lives of other people, or with sex in general, therefore they watch porn. Personally, I don't think its anything other than a mild observation of "that's the way people are".

Anyone have a dog? Notice how they are obsessed with people eating, and food in general. That's the way they are - no big deal, as long as it doesn't cause harmful behavior.

[Lancero]

24. A useless jesture today...

Might have worked in the past, when porn was only avaliable by tape and later disc, but now you can get it for free with a simple google search.

[SamKnause]

5. My 2 cents; no.

[AngryAmish]

7. It is the unpaid voluntarily auxillary sex police.

People just plain like bossing others around.

[Pakid]

8. To each there own beliefs

just don't try and make anyone else have to follow your beliefs, and we would all be better off.

[bemildred]

9. It's a matter of the owners supervising their property, pretty much.

The rich, who love to talk of morality, have never paid any attention to it in their own lives.

[xchrom]

21. +1 short and to the point.

it jumped out at me how money made it into the conversation.

[bemildred]

22. Prudery is always accompanied by the assumption that one has a right to supervise other people.

And that supposed right is always based in a property relation, a hidden assertion of ownership or control. Like your boss at work has a right to comment on your sexual arrangements for example.

[xchrom]

23. indeed. those subtleties are always lost in our conversation about this.

we have a hard time talking about money, sex and relationships.

money may SEEM invisible or not to matter but it does.

[daleo]

31. Good observation and well stated.

[Jerry442]

10. Reminds me of the Vogon captain in "Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy"

"...all planet leave is cancelled. I've just had an unhappy love affair so I do don't see why anyone else should have a good time."

[ReRe]

11. Is casual sex immoral?

Not unless you took a vow to not do it, like when you marry. If you're single and not interested in a long term relationship, I don't think it's immoral. I don't think other people's sex lives are any of my business. Each to their own. Hell, I've got enough to deal with in life without taking on handling someone else's life.

[Trillo]

29. FYI, couples modify their marriage agreements at times.

A hypothetical example might be when one marriage partner is seriously injured, and can no longer have sex, and doesn't wish their spouse to not have any sex, but they still desire to remain married. See Open Marriage.

[ReRe]

30. I'm sorry...

... I forgot to mention rare extenuating circumstances, such as the one you refer to. Again, each to their own.

[The Straight Story]

14. Their body, their choice. When it comes to sex and personal choices it ain't no one's business

If people don't like things, say 50 shades for example, don't read it and don't do things you find objectionable in the books/bedroom.

From abortion to bdsm to what you like to eat - I am pro choice and progressive not puritan and regressive.

[L0oniX]

16. Leave my fucking farm animals alone ...damn it!

[Codeine]

33. So the non-fucking farm animals

are fair game?

[packman]

17. There's no mystery

as to why other's are so interested about others sex life - they want to know if they are doing it right and what they could do to improve it.

We need to set a standard. We need charts. We need pictures. We need more inquiry. We need books and films and we need to get the internet involved in this.

[Codeine]

34. Standardized testing and a national

curriculum. Common HardCore.

[PolarVortex]

18. People tend to covet what they don't have?

Does it translate into prudishness?

[El Shaman]

19. They can't have their own and

for so long - it's in their DNA.

“Man has imagined a heaven, and has left entirely out of it the supremest of all his delights...sexual intercourse!...His heaven is like himself: strange, interesting, astonishing, grotesque. I give you my word, it has not a single feature in it that he actually values.”
~Mark Twain~
P.S.
Mr. Clements was of the Presbyterian sect.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1689_Baptist_Confession_of_Faith

[Squinch]

20. That thesis (though many replying appear not to have read it) makes sense. In those

parts of the society where women are more economically dependent, you have to ask what the basis of that economic dependence is. It makes a lot of sense that people in those segments will more often have an attitude of ownership of women, which then requires that women have a marketplace valuation as an asset. It's pretty creepy, but it does make sense that would be the thought process.

[msongs]

25. "flower must never go from bee to bee to be..." - Rodgers/hammerstein, the King and I nt

[Tom_Foolery]

28. Jealousy?

[Zorra]

32. Recommend. nt

[Quantess]

35. I tell all of 'em this....

Here is what I tell self-righteous busybodies: Fuck off and mind your own business.

[BainsBane]

36. Funny, cause some of the same people defending the 50 Shades book

Emphasis on some, insisted Hobby Lobby wasn't a big deal.

Here's your answer: rape is immoral. Presenting rape as a means of seduction and conquest of women is also immoral.

Consensual adult sex, whether causal or otherwise, is a matter for those participating.