Stop Mommy Shaming over the Gorilla Incident

[pnwmom]

Last edited Tue May 31, 2016, 09:28 PM - Edit history (4)

I remember the time my eyes opened up to how incredibly easy it would be to slip up as a parent -- with tragic consequences.

I was carrying my baby in one arm, reaching for the stair railing as my foot felt for the step below -- and somehow, for that instant, I lost my balance.

I regained it -- but in that instant I'd had the sudden vision of my baby being pitched out of my arm and headfirst down the stairs.

After that, I never just walked down the stairs with a child again. I always made a full stop at the top of the stairs, and then grabbed the handrail, and then carefully, deliberately, walked down the stairs.

But would I have ever condemned a parent who had dropped a baby going down the stairs? Never. I would have just felt grateful that it hadn't been me.

So I heartily agree with this dad's essay:

http://time.com/4352116/cincinnati-zoo-gorilla-harambe-mother/

But the real venom was directed at the mother. A Change.org petition—dubbed, inevitably, “Justice for Harambe”—read in part: “We the undersigned actively encourage an investigation of the child’s home environment in the interests of protecting the child and his siblings from further incidents of parental negligence that may result in serious bodily harm or even death.” Within two days after the incident, it had collected 313,000 of the 500,000 signatures it was seeking.

Then, Twitter did what Twitter does: it weaponized the ugliness. “I am SICK&TIRED of LAZY people who do not WATCH THEIR CHILDREN,” read one post. “[A] gorilla got killed because of a stupid child and his moron parents,” read another. And because no public debate is complete until celebrities have their say, there was Ricky Gervais tweeting, “It seems that some gorillas make better parents than some people.” D.L. Hughley, for his part, said this: “If you leave your kid in a car you go to jail, if you let your kid fall into a Gorilla Enclosure u should too!”

SNIP

Children, however, don’t play by those kinds of rules. They are the electrons in the nuclear family—kinetic, frenetic, seemingly occupying two or three places at the same moment, and drawn irresistibly to the most dangerous things in their environment. Wrangling a single child is a process of quick reflexes and constant vigilance; wrangling several of them—as Gregg was reportedly doing at the precise moment her son slipped away from her—is exponentially harder.

It speaks sweetly to human nature that we are so drawn to protect children. A lost toddler wails in a mall and a dozen grownups converge to help. And it’s a manifestly good thing that as a culture we’ve grown much more alert to the plight of kids for whom the home is the least safe place in the world. Child protective services exist for a reason. But protecting children from harm is not the same as attacking sometimes-grieving parents who work mightily, every day, to prevent that harm from coming.

Having a child—even just expecting a child—means being at least a little bit afraid for the rest of your entire life. The tiny cracks in time in which accidents happen—the millisecond before and after a child falls in a museum or tumbles into an animal enclosure—are sometimes impossible to foresee. Fearing the loss or severe injury of your own child is bad enough, thank you very much, without fearing the public shaming that can follow.

[Uponthegears]

1. Thank you

There is some big time racism and privilege at play here.

[brer cat]

2. The arrogance of the shamers

is astounding.

[DemMomma4Sanders]

140. I know...go figure. People getting upset over easily distracted and careless parents.

[Rex]

3. Stop shaming DUers that have a different opinion then you do.

[pnwmom]

4. Stop projecting. n/t

[Rex]

7. Stop deflecting. nt

nt

[Feeling the Bern]

42. Isn't that part of DU? Self righteous indignation

It isn't the irresponsible person that causes the problem, it's the people's reaction to the problem.

[DemMomma4Sanders]

141. Someone told me I had to support the mother because I'm a female.......

I was like NO. As a feminist this parent makes us all look bad, AS a feminist I put responsibility and dignity above loyalty to careless parents.

[Peregrine Took]

57. Absolutely. Wrong is wrong and that woman was wrong. Spin it anyway you like.

[840high]

69. +1

[nilram]

106. Seems like she's simply stating an opinion that's different from yours.

And maybe you're taking it as shaming.

[Democat]

127. If you don't think the gorilla deserved to die

You're a racist and you hate all mothers.

[HERVEPA]

5. Bullshit. You have kids in a potentially dangerous situation, you be especially careful.

Raised two kids. Have the kids, watch them when you need to.
Same thing the times when I take care of my grandkids.
Shaming the parent is just fine.

[Rex]

8. In Binary World you only have on and off.

Pity them for they don't know it.

[pnwmom]

19. Goody for you that you never once took your eyes off your children

in a situation that could have potentially led to a dangerous consequence.

But I have trouble believing that that is possible for any parent of more than one child.

[HERVEPA]

20. Two kids, and damn right I didn't in such a situation. Same with grandchildren.

[pnwmom]

23. You never had that particular thing happen. But you probably had

dangerous things happen that you were just blissfully unaware of. Either that or you kept your kids on leashes till they were 18.

[HERVEPA]

52. Nope. No leashes. Just attentive to my kids. Is that difficult to understand?

[pnwmom]

56. You had two children. The laws of physics wouldn't allow you to be focusing

100% of your attention on both of them 100% of the time -- unless you kept them glued at the hip.

[HERVEPA]

60. In this situation at a zoo, I sure would be 100% focused.

[pnwmom]

74. I'm saying that you could unknowingly have had children who were in danger

in other situations where your back was turned or you were otherwise distracted. Any of us could.

And you don't know about it because you got lucky that day.

[HERVEPA]

95. Disagree, and I'm done with this.

[laundry_queen]

98. HA! That's so true

When I was a kid I had a friend who had parents that were very protective and stated they knew where she was at all times. Yeah, right, that was the kid that was always jumping into the creek behind our house, or trying to push ME in. Neither of us was allowed by the creek, but she would blackmail me into going. When her mom would ask her why she was wet, she'd cry that her older brother had sprayed her with the hose. Once, when I didn't call home and let my parents know where I was, my mom said, "oh, I hope she isn't by the creek" and she later told me that my friend's mom was so condescending, "Oh, I always know what Lori is doing! I never let her out of my site! She's NEVER gone by the creek!" My mom just had to roll her eyes, LOL.

You never know when your luck will run out, or how. I know someone who lost a child on a hayride (child was sitting next to a parent, but then fell off and was run over).

Once, I was nursing my 2nd baby (now almost 16 years old) on a bed in a hotel room. She was nearly asleep, so I turned my head to talk to my husband. My arm was around her. Somehow, she woke up, wiggled down and rolled off the bed before I knew what was happening. My first clue she wasn't sleeping next to me was the loud 'thud' of her head hitting the wall before she fell on the floor. Then she screamed till she passed out, so we took her to the hospital for a work up. Well, we also got a 'work up' form social services because it was a head injury being reported (she was fine, no concussion or anything). All because I turned my head for a few seconds.

I have 4 children and I've learned to not be judgmental because no sooner than I start thinking highly of myself as a parent that something brings me down to earth. Usually with a thud.

[pnwmom]

99. Thanks for the voice of realism here.

I can also remember being a small child and seeing what I thought was some sugar in a cup in the laundry room. Yes, I was very small. And so I tasted it -- BLEGH!

My mother was a careful, conscientious mother, but stuff happens -- especially when you have multiple small children.

[Dorian Gray]

110. I was just at a zoo with my daughter

In Toronto. Beautiful zoo. Lots of wonderful animals and exhibits to see.

I don't text when I'm with her. We hold hands most of the time. She is a pretty easy child, good natured and not likely to run off. (She's 5)

However, there was a moment where I looked at the new baby white lion cubs (so cute!) and I turned to say something to her, and I couldn't find her. We had let go of our hands, and the total time I couldn't see her was probably about 15 seconds. She walked around me to get a closer look at the cubs.

Something most children do.

I know I am not a bad mom. But those seconds are all it takes for something tragic to happen.

When we jump on this mom for being negligent because for a few moments she didn't know where her child was, we are blaming the wrong person. Plus, there is a LOT of criticism for helicopter parenting.

Most times children don't jump into gorilla enclosures.

This is a freak accident. No mother would expect that a 4 year old child would be able to do that. I am shocked that it was so easy for a child to get into the gorilla exhibit.

Thank goodness that child is safe. I am heartbroken that the gorilla had to be shot, but I do think the zoo made the right decision. The life of a child needs to come first in a situation like that.

[MattBaggins]

107. I think you are full of crap

if you want us to believe you never had a single close encounter with your kids.

You are being dishonest.

[prayin4rain]

35. I take my kids to the zoo all the time. Never occurred to me to be on super duper

high alert every second we're there. We walk around, get ice cream, feed the giraffes, take pictures, etc. Nobody is on high alert. The other families I see there are doing the same thing.

[avebury]

81. I imagine that none of your chlldren (or most children for the fact of the matter)

ever announced that they wanted to go into one of the wild animal exhibits.

I don't know about you but that might be something that might increase my level of alertness.

[prayin4rain]

83. My three year old wanted to pet the jaguars or leopards (i don't remember which)

I only had one child at that time, but I don't remember it particularly freaking me out. Like I said, I don't think of zoos as high alert places. I am actually kind of a worrying, helicopter parent. If I thought of zoos as dangerous, I probably wouldn't go at all.

[treestar]

114. being judgmental is for conservatives

not liberals. We all know that it could have been us.

It was a rare circumstance and could have happened to any of it.

Trying to convince yourself you are superior is conservative behavior.

[Democat]

129. That is so wrong it's laughable. Do you judge Trump or Bush?

Being judgemental is an important part of a democratic society. Otherwise, you'll end up with President Trump.

[treestar]

132. Still misses the point that it can happen to any of us

We are lucky it usually doesn't.

I wouldn't say I "judge" trump or bush - i just think they are wrong. And not Presidential material.

[maxsolomon]

6. i'm angry with the screaming spectators

they acted like panicked primates (which we all are) and agitated the gorilla, forcing the response team to make the call to kill - prematurely. maybe try shutting the fuck up.

[Warren DeMontague]

15. There's a quote somewhere about how individual people are capable of displaying intelligence

but crowds are generally stupid as fuck.

(I have seen exceptions to this, and when it happens it is nothing short of miraculous, but ....that is a tale for a different day)

[tblue37]

28. THIS! nt

[bluestateguy]

66. That's a very good point

Silence is a wonderful thing.

[Throd]

9. Sometimes shame is deserved.

[HERVEPA]

10. Hell Yes!

[Coventina]

12. Exactly. n/t

[Rex]

17. Careful, using reason can lead down a long and pointless road.

That sounds reasonable...won't fly here.

[Logical]

18. +1000

[jack_krass]

84. +1000

[NaturalHigh]

126. Yep.

[Democat]

130. Clearly you're just racist and you hate all mothers

The gorilla deserved to die and the family is perfect.

According to many on DU.

[Dorian Gray]

137. Have you really seen people

say the gorilla deserved to die?

I am sad that the gorilla died. It's a tragic loss of life. Horrible.

But gorilla vs. child, I would always choose the child. And I think they made the right choice.

The gorillas death does not mean that the mother was to blame, either. It's a tragic accident. They happen every day in life. A little boy was killed when he ran into the street to catch a runaway ball. Nobody was at fault. He was a child. The driver who hit him was going the speed limit and couldn't expect a child to dash out in front of him. Horrible accident.

You don't need to find blame.

And I wish that gorilla had lived, but not at the expense of the life of that child.

[Warren DeMontague]

11. That was my take. We don't know what happened and the impulse to blame is misguided.

It's a tragic story which could have ended a lot worse, we should all just be glad the little boy is okay.

[NaturalHigh]

128. I can be glad the little boy is okay...

and pissed that the gorilla was killed at the same time. Lots of people can multi-task like that.

[Texasgal]

13. Shaming Mothers on the interenet

is a national pastime... it's not like we can just talk about how women look or dress ya know! GRRRR!

[gollygee]

16. No doubt

There's always some mother out there to blame for something.

[HERVEPA]

21. Bullshit. I would have the exact same reaction for a father.

[Texasgal]

24. Except the father is not mentioned

in many of these rants about the mother.

Bullshit is right!

[Coventina]

25. Why should he be when he wasn't there?

I'm not following your logic.

[Texasgal]

27. He shoudn't.

My logic is that shaming this woman and mother is easy to do and so common.

[Dorian Gray]

34. Why wasn't he there?

He should have been there. Terrible dad.

[Texasgal]

36. Why does that matter?

My Mother took me plenty of places sans Dad.

[Dorian Gray]

40. It's sarcasm

[HERVEPA]

47. Some people just can't get sarcasm. Was clear to me.

[Texasgal]

51. I'm just stupid.

Glad it was clear to you.

[Dorian Gray]

111. You aren't stupid

Not at all. I'm sure it wasn't clear to a lot of people. This topic gets people hot under the collar. Peace, Texasgal.

[Dorian Gray]

109. It happens

And this story obviously riles people up. I get why it does.

[Texasgal]

48. Sorry.. On edge here.

This story is very sad all the way around. My apologies.

[Dorian Gray]

108. No worries...

I agree. Gorilla shouldn't have been killed. Little boy should have been kept safe. (Happy he was.) It's unnecessarily sad. Then a lot of people jump on the mom and blame her, vehemently, all over the internet, nary a word about the father and where he may have been. (I was sort of responding to a comment upthread about that.)

I do think a child's life is worth saving when confronted with the damage the gorilla could have caused.

But the gorilla is a majestic, beautiful, endangered animal deserving of respect.

Instead, he was in a zoo.

There is a reason that King Kong resonates so emotionally to viewers.

[iandhr]

14. How about we talk about the issues facing the nation.

Last edited Tue May 31, 2016, 10:35 PM - Edit history (1)

The fact that the country is focused on a gorilla is a joke.

[HERVEPA]

22. can;t think of two things in the same day? Sorry about that.

[iandhr]

61. I was more commenting on the fact that it is wall to wall on all the networks.

[840high]

70. I can think of more

than 1 thing at a time.

[tabasco]

26. Yeah, I always lose track of my kids

in close proximity to a 400-pound beast.

[OnyxCollie]

29. It's the gorilla's fault for being around kids.

He had it coming.

[pnwmom]

30. I think whoever approved a 3 foot tall railing and some bushes as the barrier

bears the responsibility.

[mythology]

120. Millions of people have visited the zoo

How many of them climbed into the gorilla habitat? One. It seems like it was enough to stop stupid teenagers, suicidal adults, kids who were unaware of the danger etc. The barrier was sufficient. The parenting was insufficient.

[Mary Mac]

31. its a lose lose situation

Sad for gorilla and its keepers. Very sad for gorilla poached in Africa.

[LS_Editor]

32. People love a good witch hunt.

[prayin4rain]

33. Stories like this remind me that some really nasty people post on this board.

It's insane the way this woman is being crucified on this board. It really makes me believe the conspiracy theory that right wing trolls post here just to make us argue. This is ridiculous.

[Texasgal]

37. Unfortunatly, no.

There really are some jerks on this board.

[EllieBC]

38. I'm surprised at the level of shaming considering

people in the past have jumped through hoops to defend the parents who leave their kids in cars and let them bake to death.

I suspect because this incident led to the death of animal people are shaming. Whereas had it just been the child they would be more understanding.

[HERVEPA]

50. What a ludicrous post. Implying that animal folks don't care about children. Just dumb.

[uponit7771]

80. +1

[lancer78]

39. I disagree

The mother was negligent as it would have taken the child several minutes to get into the exhibit.

[pnwmom]

44. The diagram shows there is only a three foot railing and a four foot wide

patch of ground (with bushes) between the child and the moat. That could have been circumvented in seconds, not minutes.

[killbotfactory]

46. wrong

it was a short fence, made up of three wires, and some bushes covering up a steep drop off. any determined child could trivially bypass the fence and fall down to the habitat in a few seconds. most kids would be deterred by the height, but I guess this kid didn't know or care how far down the fall was.

[lancer78]

53. As I bought a harness

for my kid when he was 2-5 y/o with a leash attached, I never had an issue of him going to zoos.

[GulfCoast66]

41. But she believed in Jay-sus

So of course the fault is all on her.

Still can't figure out the sarcasm thingy!

[Odin2005]

45. Just type ":sarcasm:"

[GulfCoast66]

49. Thanks

[Odin2005]

43. The people bashing her for being religious are pretty pathetic, too.

This incident has shown that a lot of DUers are nasty people.

[Dorian Gray]

112. That's happening?

Of course that's happening!

::Eyeball::

(This is the first post I've heard anything about her religiosity.)

[Odin2005]

117. One of the things that drove me away from "New Atheism"...

...was the nastiness and meanness of so many "New Atheists". The breaking point for me was the deluge of hate Rebecca Watson, who runs the Skepchick blog, got when she complained of being sexually harassed on an elevator at an Atheism conference, and the haters included people like Richard Dawkins.

[Adrahil]

54. Anyone can make mistakes....

But I will say that the fact that mother lost it for a moment doesn't mean it's the zoos fault either. Ultimately it IS the parents' responsibility, even acknowledging no one is perfect all the time.

[pnwmom]

58. Are you aware that there was only a 3 foot tall railing and a four foot wide

patch of bushes between the child and the moat?

[Adrahil]

63. I am. MILLIONS of people have visited and managed not to get in there.

I don't think that shows a record of negligence. I'm not saying that the mother should hang her head in shame, but certainly not the zoo's faulty that she had a lapse. Not everything has to be the result of negligence. We cannot live in a zero risk world.

[pnwmom]

73. We won't know till the inspection team comes and determines if the enclosure

was built and maintained to the standard.

[lancer78]

55. Leave Mommy Alone!!

Sorry, no sympathy for someone who doesn't watch their kid. That is why I bought a harness with a leash attached for mine when we went out in public where it might be dangerous (Sea World, Zoos, Grand Canyon)

[tabasco]

131. Classic!

I wonder if that guy ever got invited to meet Britney.

[MFM008]

59. I'm sorry

When my son was that young I kept an iron grip on my kid. Now I only had 1 child , but you don't let the zoo babysit your kid. I would bet anything she was on her phone and the kid broke away.
Now I don't happen to believe in zoos as opposed to reserves like drive throughs and such. I told my son he was to always hold my hand or go to car.
He's still here 30 years later and never caused any animal deaths I'm relieved to say.

[complain jane]

62. That child

had just announced to his mother that he wanted to climb into the gorilla's pit. The mother said "no" twice and then "got distracted" for "about a minute". A minute is a long time to turn your back on a child who just told you that he intends to do something that could get him killed.

At least that's what I read.

[ScreamingMeemie]

64. THIS!!!! THIS!!! THIS!!!!

I have been looking and looking for someone/anyone to mention this!!!

Thank you.

Every freaking thing else aside, if my child (and no this isn't hindsight because I actually DID this) said,"mommy, I want to swim with the gorillas..." we would no longer be looking at gorillas. And that is all I have to say about this entire story.

Tragedy all around. Horrible decisions made all around.

Signed-

Mother of a long-ago curious, fearless toddler who ushered her away from many things she "wanted to do" the minute the words came out of her mouth.

[Jim Beard]

87. Thank You, Thank you, Thank you

My son was the most pleasant and obedient child I ever dealt with and the same applies to his first child, my grandson.

But I swear they have been talking about my second grandson, a total Hellion. Sweet smiling and the most defiant creature to walk the earth. He will be 5 next month. I completely understand and I had to break my policy of no spanking but it really did not make any difference.

It was like the lady that was standing beside them said... "He was on a Mission".

I remember John John Fugelsang saying just after he became a parent....Your child wakes up everyday trying to commit suicide, it is your job as a parent to keep that from happening.

[840high]

72. .+1

[avebury]

78. That is exactly what happened. NT

[dubyadiprecession]

67. The mother's inattentiveness caused the child to fall into enclosure...

What if the child fell down into the enclosure and cracked his head wide open on a rock? That rifle they used to kill the gorilla would have proved to be useless in saving that boy.

The mother is to blame in this case for not keeping her child out of harms way.

[pnwmom]

77. Or the zoo enclosure's poor design made that too easy. We don't know

because the enclosure hasn't been inspected yet to make sure it was properly built and maintained.

[bluestateguy]

68. I lean against criminal charges

That isn't going to make her better mother.

I'd say a lifetime ban from going to that zoo would be sufficient.

[avebury]

89. When you consider that consistent failure to charge negligent gun owners

who leave loaded guns around which are then used by young children to kill/shoot themselves/others on a fairly regular basis has failed to reduce the number of child related gun incidents in this country I would beg to differ. Failure to hold people accountable for their actions (or inaction at other times) teaches the lesson that there is no accountability.

If you start charging some of these adults and they end up with real jail time, adults in general might think twice about some of their actions (or sometimes inaction).

[Mojorabbit]

104. I seriously doubt that sending moms to jail

for accidents or moments of inattention will deter these incidents. We are human after all and not perfect. Everyone has off days. I followed an older kid to school when I was five. My sister got up at 4am and stole a tricycle from a neighbors garage and went down the road while my mother was asleep. We all thankfully survived and putting her in prison would have been a stupid and futile thing to do.

[pnwmom]

105. A friend had their two year old wander off

inside a friend's home. He was playing with other children, and then he was gone. The adults quickly started searching for him, and finally found him in the backyard. He had somehow slipped under a swimming pool cover and was floating there.

He was resuscitated. The water was cold and that had protected him. He's a college graduate now.

Almost everyone knows of a near-tragedy, if we're honest about it.

[aikoaiko]

71. For a lot of parents there are close calls we conveniently forget when we wag fingers at others

That's not to say that parents can't be negligent, but it's tough to watch them All the time.

I'll admit something. My boy was three and very mobile around the house.

One day I was in the living room doing some work on the computer and thought I heard a kitchen chair being pushed against the floor. I think I finished the sentence I was working on and walked into the kitchen to see my son downing some children's Tylenol straight out of the bottle.

Called poison control and reported what he consumed. They said to watch him but that he didn't invest enough to be a problem.

I was scared and embarrassed. I thought the cap was on correctly and the bottle was out of reach but I was wrong.

It was a lesson.

[uponit7771]

79. +1, they act like no other parent has ever taken their eyes off of any of their children ever...

... or never will

[pnwmom]

82. I heard a little cry from my child's bedroom once.

I took my time in the bathroom hoping he would go back to sleep.

Then I went to his room and found that the bottom of his crib had gotten partially disconnected from the sides -- and most of his body was on the floor, with his head still on the tilted-to-the-floor mattress, and the crib side across his neck. He was just lying there, looking at me.

I took the crib apart that day and sent it to the dump. It turned out that because of deaths from this situation, the government had required all manufacturers to change their crib designs so the bottom couldn't get disconnected.. I vaguely remembered hearing warnings about not BUYING used cribs. But it never occurred to me that I couldn't just use my own older child's crib for my second child.

My mistake. We were lucky.

[gollygee]

118. My daughter slipped out of the house once

And was up at the corner on her tricycle wanting to cross a fairly busy street.

I know how easily stuff can happen. You try to empty the dishwasher or fold some laundry and your kid is gone.

And at the zoo, you take a photo of kid #1 and kid #2 gets into trouble.

It would never occur to me that a kid would be physically capable of getting into a gorilla enclosure. I wouldn't be that worried about it because I wouldn't think it was possible.

[treestar]

133. Amen to your last sentence

Good point.

Accidents happen because of weird things nobody knows about.

Could have happened to anyone.

[MisterP]

75. "some people have had children: that means you shouldn't judge screaming incompetence at it"

QE fuckin' D!

[avebury]

76. Would you take the same stance if it was a daycare

taking children to the zoo and a similar incident occured and your child was the one that ended up in the moat?

That story is equally likely givein the fact that the woman involved also works for a daycare.

This is not Momma shaming. This is adult shaming. Adults are supposed to look after children. This woman failed to do so even after the child made it over abundently clear what he intended to do. If you are in a building and the fire alarm goes off you leave the building. If you hear a tornado siren, you take cover. If it is storming outside you don't go in a pool (or lake). If you see a wild animal in your yard, you don't go outside. If a 3 year old child keeps harping about going into the gorilla enclosure you cannot assume that he won't do it. He is 3 years old. Kids that age don't know any better - an adult should. There are times that you need to rely on common sense. As the old saying goes, an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.

[pnwmom]

85. I'd still say the zoo should have had an enclosure that could keep a 3 year old out. n/t

[hopemountain]

86. unless, she was occupied with texting rather than watching her child

everyday i see parents with young children - texting rather than interacting and watching their children.

[pnwmom]

88. Witnesses reported that she was interacting with the child -- but she had other

children there, too.

[Jim Beard]

92. Thank You

[jack_krass]

91. Mother/father makes no difference. Ive no doubt the same criticism would be given if the father lost

Track of the kid.

[DemMomma4Sanders]

93. The kid didn't suddenly learn to transport himself......he slowly made his way

to the point of falling in. It took time for him to get there after all its a kid. Momma should have been watching a hell of a lot closer. If it had been a shark tank.....well she'd have a funeral to plan.

The woman should face charges for criminal negligence and be forced to pay for the cost of the gorrilla as well as any therapy bills for bystanders that had to watch as a rare animal behind bars was executed.

[pnwmom]

97. Slowly? Where did you read that part? He only had to go under or over a 3 foot tall railing,

and cross a 4 foot patch of bushes.

[DemMomma4Sanders]

139. Its common sense. Its a child. If he was as fast as some people are implying

he would never have made it as far as he did. Consider the fact that his mother seems easily distracted and careless I'm surprised he's made it this far.

[pnwmom]

142. Clearly, many of us have been exposed to much faster children than you have.

Scooting under or over a barrier and crossing 4 feet could be accomplished in very little time.

[Jim Beard]

100. Have you bothered to listen to the woman standing beside them?

He pulled up and floped over the top of the fence and onward to the water. Little boys like water and dirt.

[DemMomma4Sanders]

138. He wasn't the hulk, its a child. Have you ever seen a tiny child on the monkey bars.

It takes them quite a while to pull themselves so their head rises above the bars........if they are even capable of getting that far.

[AtomicKitten]

94. The child announced his intention. More than once.

Mom was distracted. Shit happens but this time a magnificent, highly endangered animal paid the price. It was a tragedy that could have been avoided had mom done a better job.

[pnwmom]

96. And it could have been avoided with a better enclosure. Not a 3 foot high railing

and a 4 foot wide patch of bushes between the child and the moat.

[AtomicKitten]

102. that is true as well making this

a clusterf#ck with a tragic consequence

[pnwmom]

103. Agreed. n/t

[HERVEPA]

119. Yeh, and if only Gore ran a better campaign, Nader wouldn't have mattered. (sarcasm)

[MadDAsHell]

101. "Mommy" shaming? How old are we? nt

[The2ndWheel]

113. Identified as female parental unit shaming. nt

[treestar]

115. Yes, and it's embarrassing to see how many people are gleefully

jumping on the chance to feel superior to someone else. Oh, this would never happen to ME, because I am oh so virtuous.

[Orrex]

116. DU member ripcord summed it up correctly

HERE

[TipTok]

121. There is a difference between blink of an eye...

... And many seconds and minutes.

[pnwmom]

122. It could take a child seconds to go under or over a 3 foot barrier and across

a 4 foot wide bushy stretch of ground.

[TipTok]

123. Maybe this baby...

Otherwise it takes a second...

[NaturalHigh]

124. I hope she has the common decency to be ashamed of herself.

I know I would be ashamed if my actions (or inactions) endangered my child and led to that gorilla being killed.

[Ex Lurker]

134. According to her facebook posts, she's not

"accidents happen," in her words. I think a little humility would have gone a lone way in forestalling some of the "shaming," but that horse is out of the barn now, and I can't say I feel any compassion for her.

[Democat]

125. Do you also want to stop Mommy shaming Ethan Couch's mom?

After all, it's hard to be a mom these days.

[Matrosov]

135. Uh, no

I hate these 'It could happen to anyone' threads when someone forgets their baby in the backseat for eight hours or watches their toddler climb into a gorilla exhibit.

Maybe if we were more concerned about the well-being of the child rather than about the mood of the Mommy or Daddy, some of this stuff wouldn't happen in the first place.

[snooper2]

136. Depends, did the mom choose to not get her kids vaccinated or not?

LOL

[RB TexLa]

143. So the edict from mothers is no one can ever question you?

Not surprising, just a couple of weeks ago we saw how Mother's Day has become a time for them to brag about how great they are and how the world could not survive without them.

I'm sure there will be a movement to make questioning a mother over anything to be a hate crime.

[pnwmom]

144. Your edict is that no woman can ever be shamed enough, apparently. n/t

[RB TexLa]

145. No woman? You said "mommy shaming." You do know not all women are "mommies."

Nor do they all want to be.

So don't equate motherhood with womanhood. They are not the same.

[pnwmom]

146. Okay. Your edict is no mommy can be shamed enough. Got it. n/t

[RB TexLa]

147. I believe they can be questioned and held accountable. They are not a special class of citizens

who are above the law.