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Wed Jul 27, 2016, 11:09 AM

Can you be friends with someone who holds political views opposed to yours?

How successful have you been at setting aside politics to maintain friendships? If you know someone who is vehemently pro-gun while you favor gun control, can you overlook that? If you know someone who is pro-life while you are pro-choice, do you just avoid talking about it and still stay buddies?

What if someone you know and respect reveals they are supporting Trump? Can you still look at them the same way? When it comes to the latter, I just can't. I simply can't. Anyone who backs Trump's simplistic, divisive rhetoric is not a person I want to spend any more time with than I absolutely have to.

Maybe that makes me the small-minded individual, but I draw the line at the Donald.

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Reply Can you be friends with someone who holds political views opposed to yours? (Original post)
True Dough Jul 2016 OP
no_hypocrisy Jul 2016 #1
niyad Jul 2016 #2
ghostsinthemachine Jul 2016 #3
Paladin Jul 2016 #4
sarae Jul 2016 #5
blue neen Jul 2016 #6
HipChick Jul 2016 #7
NashuaDW Jul 2016 #8
2naSalit Jul 2016 #9
Jim Beard Jul 2016 #54
2naSalit Jul 2016 #60
Jim Beard Jul 2016 #64
Jim Beard Jul 2016 #87
2naSalit Jul 2016 #94
Abq_Sarah Jul 2016 #76
Jim Beard Jul 2016 #86
Throd Jul 2016 #10
HERVEPA Jul 2016 #11
lillypaddle Jul 2016 #12
Freddie Jul 2016 #13
WillowTree Jul 2016 #14
linuxman Jul 2016 #15
LeftishBrit Jul 2016 #16
Hayduke Bomgarte Jul 2016 #17
TheCowsCameHome Jul 2016 #18
narnian60 Jul 2016 #30
treestar Jul 2016 #70
former9thward Jul 2016 #19
SickOfTheOnePct Jul 2016 #71
yawnmaster Jul 2016 #20
lucca18 Jul 2016 #21
True Dough Jul 2016 #22
Tierra_y_Libertad Jul 2016 #23
dumbcat Jul 2016 #24
NaturalHigh Jul 2016 #25
PasadenaTrudy Jul 2016 #26
David__77 Jul 2016 #27
Iggo Jul 2016 #28
True Dough Jul 2016 #31
Iggo Jul 2016 #36
cherokeeprogressive Jul 2016 #81
Jim Beard Jul 2016 #91
frogmarch Jul 2016 #29
MichiganVote Jul 2016 #32
bigwillq Jul 2016 #33
LWolf Jul 2016 #34
Name removed Jul 2016 #35
AngryAmish Jul 2016 #37
True Dough Jul 2016 #40
Calculating Jul 2016 #38
ileus Jul 2016 #39
kimbutgar Jul 2016 #41
yuiyoshida Jul 2016 #42
jmg257 Jul 2016 #43
IBEWVET Jul 2016 #44
ChoppinBroccoli Jul 2016 #45
sakabatou Jul 2016 #46
Ace Rothstein Jul 2016 #47
hamsterjill Jul 2016 #48
Buckeye_Democrat Jul 2016 #49
madokie Jul 2016 #50
LanternWaste Jul 2016 #51
BlueCaliDem Jul 2016 #52
hack89 Jul 2016 #53
jonno99 Jul 2016 #55
Seeking Serenity Jul 2016 #56
karmaqueen Jul 2016 #57
closeupready Jul 2016 #58
Runningdawg Jul 2016 #59
alarimer Jul 2016 #61
lindysalsagal Jul 2016 #62
HereSince1628 Jul 2016 #63
redStateBlueHeart Jul 2016 #65
Skittles Jul 2016 #66
Blue_Tires Jul 2016 #67
cherokeeprogressive Jul 2016 #68
treestar Jul 2016 #69
luckylefty77 Jul 2016 #72
kairos12 Jul 2016 #73
Texasgal Jul 2016 #74
Abq_Sarah Jul 2016 #75
TeddyR Jul 2016 #77
kestrel91316 Jul 2016 #78
Lil Missy Jul 2016 #79
cheapdate Jul 2016 #80
3catwoman3 Jul 2016 #82
True Dough Jul 2016 #93
Different Drummer Jul 2016 #83
End Of The Road Jul 2016 #84
Rex Jul 2016 #85
tammywammy Jul 2016 #88
hexola Jul 2016 #89
DFW Jul 2016 #90
GreenEyedLefty Jul 2016 #92

Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 11:13 AM

1. It depends.

I couldn't abide with my father who admired Ronald Reagan, Barry Goldwater, Newt Gingrich, etc. He was an authoritarian through and through and used his political affiliations as justification for trying to control my life and persecuting me when I strode for independence.

OTOH, I have a dear friend who lives in a settlement in Israel on land coopted from Palestinians. He loves Glenn Beck and Sarah Palin. If Trump hadn't been even remotely anti-semitic, I'm sure he'd be a supporter. We don't see eye-to-eye politically but we're extremely loyal to each other. We've been friends since age 9. I've come to his aid without hesitation and will continue to do so.

The difference between my father and my friend is how each uses his political affiliation: my father to control me and my friend to attempt to understand chaos that frightens him.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 11:14 AM

2. there are already several people, casual friends, to whom I no longer speak, since they

expressed admiration for der drumpfenfuhrer. I have no time, and no respect, for anybody who has any kind of admiration for him.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 11:14 AM

3. Most of my friends are lifelong Republucans

Some I can talk politics with, others are so FOX news that I can't. A couple are incredibly stupid and I have been forced to tell them that i cannot be around them anymore.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 11:15 AM

4. Sure you can.

Most grown-ups are capable of reaching a tacit understanding about subjects which are off-limits for discussion. I have a bunch of old friends who have gone conservative on me, but I still find their friendships worthwhile. Those who are incapable of such adult behavior are no longer friends of mine.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 11:18 AM

5. To a point.

But under no circumstances could I be friends with anyone who would even consider voting for a racist, sexist POS like Trump.

I would also assume they hate me, since I'm hispanic.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 11:18 AM

6. This can be done,

but I respectfully ask these people to refrain from talking about politics completely. If they don't respect that request, then it's time to let go of that friendship---at least for awhile.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 11:19 AM

7. I dated a Republican...

It went well, until he brought up Obama...

I dumped him shortly before the last election..

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 11:20 AM

8. Most certainly

Every relationship, including friendship, requires boundaries.

I have several close friends that I ride and play golf with that differ sharply from some my positions ... we simply agree to avoid those topics and life is good.

I don't see it as my responsibility to try to bring them around to what I believe.

They are all well educated, professionally employed, home owners to came to their beliefs through their life experiences.

As much as I think I'm on the right side of issues - I'm not arrogant enough to someone who disagrees with me is an idiot.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 11:23 AM

9. I live in

a very small, rural community and there are those with whom I have political disagreements yet I rely on them for vital services and goods a good part of the time and trust some with my life. I don't know anyone who supports the dumpster fire, those whom I have met are people whom I would cross the road to avoid engaging in any kind of conversation.

Those with whom I rely and do business have agreed to not engage in any deep conversation about those topics most of the time but when we do, the conversation ends in an agreement to disagree since we know we need each other to survive and trusting each other for that purpose has to supersede politics.

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Response to 2naSalit (Reply #9)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 02:05 PM

54. I am in the same situation but the business people had rather not discuss it.

 

I have business contact with the Republican County Chair about twice a month in the summer and most all others. Here, they separate business from politics at least around me.

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Response to Jim Beard (Reply #54)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 03:00 PM

60. Indeed.

The key is to be respectful and civil about it.

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Response to 2naSalit (Reply #60)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 08:23 PM

64. I agree and it is mutual.

 

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Response to 2naSalit (Reply #60)

Thu Jul 28, 2016, 08:52 PM

87. I am very crtitcal of businesses that have FOX News on in waiting areas.

 

It depends on my situation if I say anything while I am there, especially if I am with family and friends and it really infuriates me to be in that situation. I usually call those back at a later time and if I can do it, I suggest another place if possible to my friends and family.

The first time I went to my cardiologist office. TV's in every waiting room tuned to FOX News with signs on them telling patients not to change the channel. I got out of there as fast as I could and am going to much better doctors.

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Response to Jim Beard (Reply #87)

Thu Jul 28, 2016, 11:59 PM

94. Yeah...

that usually tells me it's time to go elsewhere and I do.

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Response to Jim Beard (Reply #54)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 10:31 PM

76. I own a small business

And it's completely apolitical. I don't do endorsements, I don't do bumper stickers or campaign signs at work. I want everyone to feel comfortable and be willing to pay me for the services I provide without dragging politics into the mix.

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Response to Abq_Sarah (Reply #76)

Thu Jul 28, 2016, 08:42 PM

86. I know customers appreciate it.

 

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 11:34 AM

10. Of course, as long as they are respectful of me and my beliefs.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 11:36 AM

11. First, it's anti-choice, not pro-life.

 

That term is one the antis came up with and get away with. I'm pro-choice and pro-life.

And the general answer is only a superficial friendship at most.
Being a political opposite implicitly shows lack of caring for those different / less fortunate that you.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 11:36 AM

12. No, I can't

They raise my blood pressure.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 11:39 AM

13. It depends

Casual friend or colleague? Of course. I never discuss politics at work and if someone else does, I try to change the subject. Unless the person expresses liberal opinions then I quietly agree with them and still change the subject.
Close friends? Just about all my close friends are liberals like me. One guy is an "old fashioned reasonable Republican" says he's liberal on social issues but fiscally conservative. We can get into reasoned discussions and often he'll end up agreeing with me.
Spouse or partner? No way in hell. I'm happily married to a fellow lib but if I were dating that would be a total dealbreaker.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 11:42 AM

14. I have quite a few friends who are "on the dark side" politically.

We just don't talk politics. It works.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 11:46 AM

15. Yeah. It's called being a self assured adult.

 

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 11:50 AM

16. Certainly, but there are some limits

I have several friends who vote Tory. I have friends who are pro-life; friends who voted to Leave the EU (a big issue with me at the moment); I don't think I have any friends who are gun-fanatics but not many people are in the UK.

However, I wouldn't choose a vehement racist or e.g. holocaust denier as a friend, and, while I might be friends with someone who just always votes Republican in America, I couldn't easily be friends with someone who enthusiastically backs Trump's rhetoric. Not that it's likely to come up, as I can't imagine such a person particularly wanting me as a friend, either.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 11:57 AM

17. Can you be friends with someone who holds political views opposed to yours?

I used to be able to. Years ago. In light of what's gone down over the past 15-20 years, the blind and undeserved support of Boy George, the hate and racism that's boiled over since PBO took office, just to name two... No. Absolutely not. Not anymore.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 12:00 PM

18. It is becoming more difficult.

...MUCH more difficult.

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Response to TheCowsCameHome (Reply #18)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 12:41 PM

30. Totally agree.

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Response to TheCowsCameHome (Reply #18)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 09:24 PM

70. This ^^^

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 12:00 PM

19. I never let politics interfere with friendships.

People who are intolerant to other people's views I stay away from.

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Response to former9thward (Reply #19)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 09:28 PM

71. Well said

I agree 100%.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 12:04 PM

20. Absolutely, as long as they are rational...

The ability to be rational is much more important to me than one's political leanings.

There is so so much more to life than politics.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 12:06 PM

21. It's been really tough!

I advised my friend to stop sending me outrageous right wing talking points.
When she sent several offensive 'jokes', I told her she was better than this!

We haven't spoken in months. I have known her for over 30 years. Sadly, I don't know her anymore, (or did I ever).

She seemed to change when she moved to Texas and became an evangelical Christian.
She eventually left that religion and returned to her Catholic faith. (Maybe the Pope can talk some sense into her).

I mourn for the close friend I once had....

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 12:06 PM

22. There's some agreement here...

That it is harder to maintain friendships with Republicans in this political climate than in the past. It's little wonder when polarizing figures such as Trump and the Tea Party have taken center stage. Not all Republicans are at that far end of the spectrum (thank goodness), but those who are anywhere close to that are practically impossible to tolerate. Even if you agree not to discuss politics directly, conversation often turns to current events that reveal how shrill their views are. Ugh!

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 12:13 PM

23. Yes.

 

Most of the friends I have share similar political views. But, I have had friends whose political views are very different and/or contradictory to mine. Solution: We don't talk politics.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 12:19 PM

24. No.

I have few friends, but I choose them wisely.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 12:25 PM

25. If I couldn't, I'd be one lonely individual.

Almost all of my friends are voting for Trump. My wife is voting for Stein. My parents haven't decided yet, but I'm pretty sure they'll vote for Clinton.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 12:28 PM

26. I guess I'm lucky

Everyone I know is a Democrat. I live in a very blue area. Don't know a single person who owns a gun or supports gun ownership.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 12:30 PM

27. Yes, I can.

My father and his wife are Trump supporters. I do not hold personal animus against them for that, and have affection for them.

I have another friend who is politically conservative, and I think dislikes both Clinton and Trump, and I like her very much.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 12:38 PM

28. Kind of, yeah.

For instance, I'm a pretty serious hockey fan. My brother has season tickets and I see easily 10 to 20 games and sometimes more per year, and there's people I see there all the time who I consider friends. We sing and cheer and laugh together, buy each other drinks and food. We've even had a couple dozen of 'em and their kids over the house for several parties. Game-watch parties, my sister-in-law's college graduation party, Stanley Cup victory parties, and like that. Nice people. I like 'em.

Now, I ain't on Facebook, and my bro and my SIL tell me that it's probably better that I'm not. They've shown me a few of the political back-and-forths these people get into, and if that happened at the house, we'd have a problem.

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Response to Iggo (Reply #28)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 12:45 PM

31. Who's your hockey team?

Not trying to pick a fight, just curious. (there should be a "smiley" here with missing teeth, since a lot of hockey players are missing Chiclets).

I root for the Edmonton Oilers, a club with an abundance of young talent that hasn't been able to pull it together for many years. But with Conner McDavid in the fold and Todd McLellan behind the bench, I'm hopeful that things will finally start to come together over the next couple of seasons.

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Response to True Dough (Reply #31)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 01:13 PM

36. GO KINGS GO.

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Response to Iggo (Reply #36)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 11:21 PM

81. THIS.

 

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Response to Iggo (Reply #28)

Thu Jul 28, 2016, 09:17 PM

91. I check my Facebook occasionally, and what I

 

do about those that insist on posting political links. I simply quit following them. It was my sisters husband and she was bad to.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 12:41 PM

29. Only for as long as I don't know.

Then it's off!

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 12:49 PM

32. I can be friendly-but we usually avoid our political differences.

 

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 12:49 PM

33. Yes (nt)

 

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 12:59 PM

34. I don't have a problem, most of the time.

Of course, being one of the older generation, I was raised on the mantra that religion and politics don't belong in civil conversation.

So unless I'm gathered with people who actually gathered to discuss those things, I don't. If someone brings up either of those two topics to discuss, as long as they keep it civil I engage them. If they simply cannot keep it civil, I courteously express disagreement and physically remove myself from their presence. That stops it, because they no longer have an audience. Fortunately, that's rare. It has never involved my friends. One member of my extended family, and a few co-workers, but still, very rare.

Your scenario happened to my mom recently; she, to her credit, is one of those people who just loves people, loves everybody, and automatically attributes the best characteristics to them. I've spent decades comforting her when she is then shocked or disappointed. It's a routine part of my relationship with her.

This time, though, she was devastated. She's 78. I held her last week while she cried. She honestly is so sensitive that she is crushed by people's expressions of hate. I talked her through it. At her age, she says she can't afford to lose any friends, because too many of them are dying off anyway. But she doesn't think she can stay in contact with this one. I suggested that she make herself scarce until after November, and then test the waters.

I am a different person. I seem to have always been aware of the hate around me, and the hate simmering in others. I've tried to balance that by specifically focusing on whatever I can find that is positive in the people around me. I like people, even plenty of people I don't agree with. But then, the reality is that I am a true Lone Wolf. I agree with some people about some things, but there is really no group of people I align with in total, and I haven't tried for the last decades. My mom is a better person than I. I, on the other hand, have developed thick calluses when it comes to hateful people. And I encounter hateful people everywhere I go. I just do my best to either not engage them at all, or engage them softly, and defuse the circular feeding frenzy that they routinely engage in.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)


Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 01:14 PM

37. I find life much richer and diverse if everyone agrees with me.

 

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Response to AngryAmish (Reply #37)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 01:27 PM

40. Bahahaha

Good one!

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 01:24 PM

38. Yes

But only if we avoid talking about political stuff.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 01:27 PM

39. I wouldn't have but one friend left if I hated everyone else.

It's a lonely life being a lefty here in my area...

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 01:29 PM

41. I would take a second look at that person as to what they value if they supported the hateful cheeto

Probably be very cautious around them going forward

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 01:30 PM

42. Absoulutely

my Best friend was a Republican. She and I vowed never to discuss politics. We got along great. We also don't talk about Religion. She is a born again Christian and I am Buddhist. We made that a taboo long ago.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 01:35 PM

43. Yep, no problem. I am fairly passionate, but try to be understanding and open-minded for the most

part.

Rationality matters. As does experiences...others are often different then mine.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 01:37 PM

44. Yes

I have a group of people I play disk golf with who cover the political spectrum. Some times we will tease each other about politics, but our friendship is the most important thing, so we don't take it personal.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 01:41 PM

45. One Of My Best Friends Is An Adamant Drumpf Supporter

Because he is incapable of holding a civil conversation when it comes to Drumpf (he's gone full fanboy and won't hear a negative word spoken about his hero), we just don't talk about that subject.

I will admit, however, that while I used to admire his intellect and reasoning, his support of Drumpf has actually caused me to lose a lot of respect for him and to really question his judgment. He's actually sold out almost everything I knew him to believe in just to twist his views so they match Drumpf's. He was a self-described Libertarian whose hero is Ron Paul. Apparently the fact that Drumpf's policies pretty much all would make any true Libertarian vomit with rage, and the fact that his hero is a "Never Trumper" doesn't cause him any issue whatsoever. He's a Libertarian talking about how we need to ban all immigration and purge all the "vile Muslims" (his words) from our society. He told me he thinks President Obama LOVES it when there's racial discord in this country. This is a guy who voted for Obama twice because he hates McCain and Romney. He used to be adamantly anti-war and anti-intervention, and now he's talking about attacking pretty much everyone. He says he won't vote for Hillary because she's a liar, yet he's an unrepentant cheerleader for Drumpf, who lies like it's a bodily function. And all of this started a year ago, simply because he said he thought it was funny how Drumpf wasn't nice to the other candidates during debates and told them to "shut up" and stuff.

When we steer clear of politics, we're the best of friends. But I must admit, I've lost a lot of respect for him. He's now a walking, talking right-wing wacko website. He has all the hateful rhetoric and buzzphrases down to a tee and will repeat them any chance he gets. So yes, it can be done, but it's not easy.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 01:46 PM

46. Yes

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 01:47 PM

47. It depends on the views.

I could never be friends with a social conservative.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 01:53 PM

48. If the respect is mutual.

I am surrounded by Trump supporters here in Texas so if I want to talk to just about ANYONE, I have to allow for the possibility that person supports Trump.

I can respect anyone's opinion as long as THEY respect MINE. I am happy to listen to their arguments as long as they are willing to listen to mine. I tell anyone upfront that I was born a Democrat and I'll die a Democrat.

What I cannot and WILL NOT handle is when one of my male friends tries to talk down to me because he thinks I don't know what I'm talking about because I'm a woman. Those types strangle my air space and I move away quickly.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 01:53 PM

49. It depends...

If I'm talking to an "Ann Coulter type," then it's impossible because they treat me like I'm in cahoots with the devil because I disagree with their latest agenda from hate-talk radio.

If a conservative is respectful AND honest, I treat them in kind even if I disagree with their viewpoints much of the time.

I've met some liberals with whom I don't discuss politics because they become too disrespectful as well, although that doesn't happen as often in my personal life.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 01:57 PM

50. I only talk politics with friends who I agree with

same with religion. Although I let friends know that I'm a NON believer in anything bible/god/jesus

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 01:58 PM

51. I wouldn't consider anyone small-minded for actively avoiding racists, sexists, or homophobes

 

About a third of my friends are conservatives, and about one quarter of my close friends are. Though 20 years ago we would argue simply for the sake of arguing, these days we simply don't talk about politics-- not to avoid offense, but to allow more time to talk about those things we have in common.

Being that I'm not close to being wise enough to emphatically state that it's an absolute good or an absolute bad, or that an acceptance or denial of a friendship predicated on political views alone is narrow- or broad-minded, I can only realize that they are indeed, my friends and have demonstrated that to me time and time again. And being that none of them are racist, sexist or homophobic ("that's a plank of my party platform I'm uncomfortable with" or "despite those planks, I think the major issues are..." as they might say), I'm pretty comfortable with who they are as they are with me.

But I wouldn't consider anyone small-minded for actively avoiding racists, sexists, or homophobes-- which seems to be a major fault line between the parties in the here and now, as opposed to when my friends and I became politically aware.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 02:00 PM

52. Only if an agreement is made that we never talk politics and/or religion. Otherwise? No. eom

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 02:02 PM

53. It's very easy to do

I have old friends that are Trump supporters - we simply don't discuss politics.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 02:08 PM

55. I'm friends with my brother (we just don't talk politics anymore). nt

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 02:11 PM

56. Yep. You can even be married to one.

I'm Exhibit A. And I love my man.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 02:17 PM

57. Most of the time I can handle it...

I have a few friends and some family who are republicans. I realize to have differing view and ideas are important to the survival of our species. What I can't take and have a real hard time with is when people spread, lies, untrue memes put out by fake news sites, and use religion to justify any mean thing they are doing to others. The adoration of the guns is another thing that makes it hard.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 02:25 PM

58. To have a friend, you have to BE a friend.

 

I don't let politics warp my natural ability to form friendships with others, and I have friends whose politics lie all across the political spectrum.

It's weird - just last week, I was watching a nature special about cross-species friendships - dogs/polar bears, grizzly/tiger/lion, crow/hyena, etc. I think of these relationships, and in that light, we humans can seem like such ignorant worms.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 02:30 PM

59. I currently have 2 "friends" who fall into this category

every liberal in OK has a least a few. For the most part, we don't discuss politics, religion or current events. When the occasional FB post crosses that line, I usually ignore that too. However, when they post something that makes it personal its time to boot them. The last time I did that, my husband and I had a nice evening at our friends home. The husband is a police officer. Not once did the conversation stray into the area of BLM or police brutality. The next morning, after a police shooting, she posts a rant on FB "liberals are trying to kill my husband". When I called her on it she of course said "I didn't mean you" Yeah bitch, 'ya did.
I can put up with some snarky comments but not a liar.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 03:03 PM

61. If I talk to them off the internet.

Because people are assholes on the internet. I don't know why that is, but it tends to bring out the worst in a lot of people.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 04:25 PM

62. I am everything the gop hates: union, librul, pro choice, divorced

teacher, pacifist, atheist, female, and I think for myself.

Pretty much I can count on republicans not wanting anything to do with me. So it never comes up.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 04:33 PM

63. What is a "friend". Im told the the SO has hundreds of friends on facebook

I don't think these are really friends.

Me? Guess what? I have no facebook friends. Mostly because I don't click to make people "friends".

Yes it's true. I don't 'click' with strangers.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 08:32 PM

65. I don't have any right-wing friends. However, my boyfriend is a Donald Trump fan

And will vote for him. Voted for Obama in 2008 - go figure. This election season has been very trying as far as our relationship goes, not gonna lie. Advice is appreciated.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 08:44 PM

66. no

anyone who would support Trump makes me sick

I don't want friends who support a party that is xenophobic, racist, sexist, anti-worker, anti-science, etc.....fuck them

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 09:03 PM

67. I operate on reciprocity

If my politics isn't a problem for the other person, I will always return the courtesy

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 09:21 PM

68. I don't talk politics with friends. Ever. I don't proselytize nor do I lecture.

 

I am not a fair-weather friend. In for a penny in for a pound.

In my opinion; those who give up relationships with family and friends over politics are neither family, nor friend. People like that can't be counted on.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 09:22 PM

69. On the surface

But not for real.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 09:29 PM

72. yeah sometimes it's harder to be friends with someone who agrees with you.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 09:35 PM

73. I can, but it is a friendship that dates back 35 years.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 09:48 PM

74. I refuse to define myself

with politics.

Fuck that!

I meet people everyday. I am a surgical nurse. Every one of patients have the same goal. They all want to live and love. I will never allow a fucking political race to define my very being!

I have so much more to offer than being pissed off about politics.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 10:27 PM

75. I don't discuss politics with my friends

I have no desire to be friends with someone who makes politics their entire universe. Either it's going to be an echo chamber or I'm going to disagree with them and where's the fun in that?

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 10:35 PM

77. Of course

 

If you are an adult. Is this a serious question? I thought cliques were for high school and the movie Mean Girls.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 10:51 PM

78. I'm friends with a guy I dated nearly 30 years ago. We

 

reconnected on FB about 6 years ago.

Turns out he is really RW, and of course I am really progressive. We decided to salvage our sincere friendship that we would not be FB friends until after the election. And then we just won't discuss politics when we get together except to poke gentle fun at each other.

It is working. He really is a dear, but the relationship obviously can't go beyond friendship, lol. We're both cool with that.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 10:52 PM

79. yes, but we don't discuss politics.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Wed Jul 27, 2016, 10:53 PM

80. Yes.

I have friends who call themselves Jacksonian Republicans, revolutionary socialists, anarchists, etc. We don't have to agree on everything.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Thu Jul 28, 2016, 05:47 PM

82. This is something I have been pondering for several months, ever since I saw...

...a FaceBook post from a childhood friend of mine, in which she spoke disparagingly and dismissively of "libtards."

She still lives where we grew up, in Rochester NY. I have moved several times - San Antonio TX and Japan (courtesy of the Air force nurse corps), grad school in Denver, upper peninsula of MI and Washington DC area (my husband's last 2 AF assignments), and now the greater Chicago area.

We have seen each other only at high school reunions, and the last one I was able to get to was the 40th, in 2009, well before I saw this FB post. I am pretty sure it does not occur to her that she is talking about me when she talks about "libtards." I wonder how she would feel if she did know. Might she be embarrassed, or would she dismiss me as a jerk, or pray for me to be saved (she became a fundamentalist).

I have some strong negative feelings about people with uncompromisingly intolerant attitudes - those we often call the RWNJs. I choose to limit their expression to forums such as DU, where I know I am amongst like-minded people. I have no need to be offensive or inflammatory in a public forum such as Facebook. I never assume anyone thinks as I do about anything.

We will probably see each other at the 50th re-union in 2019. I will feel awkward inside, knowing how she thinks of people like me, and I am not sure how it will go.

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Response to 3catwoman3 (Reply #82)

Thu Jul 28, 2016, 11:54 PM

93. I can relate to what you're saying...

and I generally reserve my disdain for Drumpf to anonymous discussion boards but not exclusively. I have posted a few anti-Trump memes and stories on Facebook and have "liked" or commented on other friends' posts expressing similar sentiment. Admittedly, most of my friends are liberals but there may have been a few right-leaning ones in the crowd who didn't like what they saw. If they "unfriended" me, I haven't noticed. But so be it.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Thu Jul 28, 2016, 05:58 PM

83. I can be friends with them, but they don't all

feel like they can be friends with me. I live in the deeply red state of Georgia and my liberal views are an anomaly here. I don't generally discuss my political views with other people if I know they don't agree with me and/or I'm unsure, but some people have found out how I feel and it's cost me a couple of "friends."

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Thu Jul 28, 2016, 06:04 PM

84. I can maintain relationships with almost everyone except...

misogynists.

That's where I draw the line. Of course, a lot of republicans are misogynists...

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Thu Jul 28, 2016, 06:12 PM

85. Can you be friends with someone that has a different opinion then yours?

 

Some peoples egos get in the way of common sense.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Thu Jul 28, 2016, 08:59 PM

88. Yes, I'm friends with conservatives.

One of my best friends is a strong conservative. We recently went on vacation together. I disagree with her, but I respect her right to her views. And it goes both ways.

Amusing story. A few months ago a coworker found out I'm a democrat and said that I needed to "read and learn" more. I told my friend and she was aghast. She knows I'm a well educated and informed person and was dumbstruck that someone would say otherwise.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Thu Jul 28, 2016, 08:59 PM

89. If you can't - you have issues...

 

I live in rural South Central PA - everybody is a Republican - and supposedly "conservative"

I absolutely enjoy political sparing with my friends...

It would seem silly to me to "unfriend" people who I've known since high school - over politics...

Your "National Scope" - is pretty irrelevant on the local level.

When the cops were busting everybody in my town...we ALL banded together...showed up at Boro meetings - and MADE IT STOP!

We are more alike than different!

If you are dwelling on this stuff too much - stop - take a step back...just vote!

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Thu Jul 28, 2016, 09:02 PM

90. Oddly enough, yes

When I was much younger, I thought it impossible. As a 15 year old on the grounds of the Pentagon, looking on with disdain at National Guard troops, nervous when people were going up to them placing flowers in the barrels of their guns, I thought it was an unbridgeable rift.

Later on, I learned that it wasn't as cut and dried as I thought. I found that guys I got along with were staunch Republicans. One friend is a real nut case politically. The Prince of Darkness. Singlehandedly started direct-mail fundraising in 1980 that helped Reagan beat Jimmy Carter. But a nice guy with whom I can sit down while we tear each other's politics to shreds. He's over 80 now, and still as active as ever. Curious, but true.

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Response to True Dough (Original post)

Thu Jul 28, 2016, 09:53 PM

92. I can be friends with reasonable people,

including gun owners, pro-lifers, etc. I respect people who are conservative and liberal, but have a hard time with extremists and hateful people of any political stripe.

I suspect a YUUUGE chunk of Trump's primary voters were people making a statement, loud and clear, about the state of the GOP. They were not people voting *for* Trump but against the other candidates.

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