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brooklynite

(93,873 posts)
Mon Sep 5, 2016, 01:03 AM Sep 2016

Is marriage outdated in Iceland?

CNN

With 40% of its babies born out of wedlock, America sits near the middle of the global pack in this category.

Conservative Turkey brings up the rear with a scant 3%.

And the nation at the top of the list? The world leader in single moms?

Iceland.

More than two-thirds of Icelandic babies -- 67% -- are born to parents who are not married.
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The Velveteen Ocelot

(115,280 posts)
3. Quite the opposite.
Mon Sep 5, 2016, 01:39 AM
Sep 2016

It's probably one of the most progressive and feminist countries in the world. They are not very religious and there is a strong social safety net. It just isn't necessary to be married.

underahedgerow

(1,232 posts)
2. Marriage is very archaic. I don't see why relationships need to be validated and endorsed
Mon Sep 5, 2016, 01:11 AM
Sep 2016

by any governments.

A simple contract should suffice for the purposes of sharing assets in the event of the division, and a further contract to be sure the children are sufficiently cared for.

Although maybe Icelandic men are more stand-up than men elsewhere. Or maybe family support systems, social services and quality of life are such that it doesn't matter.

REP

(21,691 posts)
4. As I understand it, it's a bit of both
Mon Sep 5, 2016, 01:54 AM
Sep 2016

There's no shame in being unwed and a parent, or an unwed couple with kids (nor is abortion shameful). Their social support system is there for everyone, and the culture treats both genders more humanely.

As for your first point, I could not agree more. Having the governmental stamp of approval does not make my relationship more legitimate. For non-property rights, such as hospital visitation, etc and the other rights marriage grants, there is a way to handle that without a million legal documents (although the cost of a lawyer to draw up those papers is bound to be less than that of an average wedding). Weddings can and should happen as those who want them want them, but they shouldn't have legal status. In a perfect world. In the one we have, at least marriage isn't just for one part of the population now.

Warpy

(110,913 posts)
5. Marriage is how you promote a non blood relative into first degree relative status
Mon Sep 5, 2016, 02:28 AM
Sep 2016

ahead of siblings, parents, and anyone else. If you want your partner to visit you in an ICU or make your funeral arrangements after you kick the bucket, marriage is about the only thing that does that.

Warpy

(110,913 posts)
9. The only other way is adoption and that is easily contested
Mon Sep 5, 2016, 10:55 AM
Sep 2016

when push comes to shove outside a hospital ICU.

dhol82

(9,351 posts)
8. And yet
Mon Sep 5, 2016, 04:05 AM
Sep 2016

I was intrigued, both times I visited, by the exceptional popularity of wedding ring sets in the windows of the jewelry stores.
Maybe they just like to wear the rings without the formalities?

hunter

(38,264 posts)
10. They often get married later, when they are financially well established...
Mon Sep 5, 2016, 11:17 AM
Sep 2016

... and not necessarily to the other parent of their own children.

The Velveteen Ocelot

(115,280 posts)
11. Maybe the jewelers are desperately trying to promote them
Mon Sep 5, 2016, 11:24 AM
Sep 2016

by putting them in the shop windows, hoping that more people will want to get married and buy them?

CBGLuthier

(12,723 posts)
12. Considering that they use the old system of "last names" and don't actually have family names
Mon Sep 5, 2016, 11:29 AM
Sep 2016

at least the whole whose name does the baby take issues are non-existent.

dhol82

(9,351 posts)
13. Although
Mon Sep 5, 2016, 11:35 AM
Sep 2016

From what I understand, they still take the father's name.
Always followed by son or dottir but still the father's name not the mother's.

ismnotwasm

(41,921 posts)
14. I don't think so
Mon Sep 5, 2016, 11:46 AM
Sep 2016

I believe in general marriage forms will certainly change, since it's no longer the equivelent of ownership papers for women, and eventually the world will recognize Gay people as the necessary part of the human condition they are. I'd love to see the end of heterosexism, as it is "outdated"
The article seems to indicate that marriage is put off, and children are not stigmatized for being born to unmarried women, and women are not shamed for it.

Perhaps we will see the evolution of short term contracts instead of a life-long commitment, but I don't think it's going away, even in Iceland. Human beings tend to pair bond. The ones that don't shouldn't have to of course

But really who knows?

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