When Mitch McConnell dies

[sharp_stick]

I will work on getting that day named a National holiday. Just because I'll be so happy to celebrate the day that piece of shit goes room temperature.

[Skittles]

1. the man doesn't have to work

he just ENJOYS sticking it to the poor

a true psychopath

[Alice11111]

2. McTurtle, Ryan, Chaffetz, Gowdy all enjoy causing suffering

to children, the disabled, the poor, and anyone but the filthy rich and calloused.

[LeftInTX]

3. I'll just be glad when he's gone from the senate

[LOL Lib]

4. It will be a great day for America and worthy of a holiday.

I would just be terrible if he lingers alone, bed ridden in agony, and begs for the sweet release of death. Terrible I tell ya.

[NanceGreggs]

5. When Mitch McConnell dies ...

... I'll go to his funeral in a red dress.

[brer cat]

7. I will too

[Ilsa]

21. It would be fun to wear tap shoes to it. NT

[cloudbase]

10. I'll go to the funeral as well.

Just to make sure.

Hope I don't catch Elaine with the pool boy.

[Dustlawyer]

23. I will go just to make sure that S.O.B. is really dead and in the casket!

[old guy]

51. Won't be a casket.

He is so damn crooked they will just screw him in the ground.

[AwakeAtLast]

29. And i

Will drop trou and piss on his grave. I might even chuck the pants for a skirt!

[old guy]

52. I probably won't do that.

I hate standing in long lines.

[putitinD]

6. He looks like he died 10 years ago. somebody should take his pulse!

[Ilsa]

20. Huh. I thought I smelled formaldehyde in the Senate Chamber. nt

[dalton99a]

8. The world will be a better place.

[shenmue]

9. I'll have cake

[irisblue]

11. I'm going to need a jar with a lid.

And them I'm gonna find Shenmue...

[sharp_stick]

16. I'll stop and pick you up. nt

[VOX]

12. Cheney Exit Day is first in queue. Limbaugh Exit Day is a close 2nd...

Roger Ailes shouldn't be left out of the party. Same with all those pieces of fetid matter crapped out of the dying lower colon of the Nixon administration.

But yes, The Turtle's "transformation" really must be celebrated with gusto.

[sharp_stick]

15. I'll rent a bus

get a pallet or two of beer pick up every one I can find and head to his grave so we can piss on it.

[VOX]

17. Sounds excellent! I will spring for the pallets 'o suds...

Also, I'll knock back a few on the way so I can really provide a "thorough irrigation."

[briv1016]

13. You say that like his replacement will be better.

The names may change but the policy of hate will always remain.

[sharp_stick]

14. I honestly don't care

I despise Turtle. Satan himself could replace him, probably not be any more evil, and I'll still smile.

[Solly Mack]

18. Whenever he dies it will be a case of his dying far too late.

McConnell should have been aborted, spontaneously or otherwise.

[MurrayDelph]

19. If he's not buried at sea

That's going to be one well-fertilized grave.

[bdamomma]

22. I almost got excited with the title of

your thread, but then I saw "When". He is a vile man.

[Martin Eden]

24. He will have to warm up to reach room temp (turtles are reptilian) n/t

[sarcasmo]

25. I'M throwing a party.

[oldtime dfl_er]

26. This is a thread after my own heart

I never thought anyone despised him as much as me. I will lead a marching band dressed in red across his grave.

[Thomas Hurt]

27. they should probably have a 24 hr guard on his grave

a lot of people are going to want piss on it.

[Dem2theMax]

28. This thread has the potential to be one of DU's finest.

I am howling with laughter at all of the replies.

DU. The best place on the Internets.

[ET Awful]

30. Why was I expecting to read a joke about turtle soup?

[LastLiberal in PalmSprings]

31. I will not attend his funeral

I hate to wait in line to pee.

[OldRedneck]

32. I will not go piss on his grave.

I don't like standing in line all day.

[OnDoutside]

48. It wouldn't be the first time...

Charles J Haughey was a former Irish Prime Minister. And crook.

[clarkrd]

33. I won't be sad.

But I won't be happy either.

Im sorry, I wont shed glee on the death of someone I disagree with.

[niyad]

43. this isn't "someone we disagree with" , like whether one likes pinot or cab, this is about

one of the most vicious, ugly, hate-mongering pieces of shite who waste our taxpayer money and oxygen.

[smirkymonkey]

34. That day can't come soon enough for me.

It will be a day of jubilation!

[bathroommonkey76]

35. It'll be reminiscent of Jesse Helms death! lol

Cept I'll be baking a turtle cake and watching this turtle video in his honor.

All I did after Helms death was masturbate into a sock.

[Tanuki]

36. You might be in for a long wait.

Just sayin'.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Harriet_(tortoise)



Harriet (c. 1830 – June 23, 2006) was a Galápagos tortoise (Geochelone nigra porteri) who had an estimated age of 175 years at the time of her death in Australia. Harriet is the third oldest tortoise, behind Tu'i Malila, who died in 1965 at the age of 188, and Adwaita, who died in 2006 at the estimated age of 255.[1][2][3][4]

She was reportedly collected by Charles Darwin during his 1835 visit to the Galápagos Islands as part of his round-the-world survey expedition, transported to England, and then brought to her final home, Australia, by a retiring captain of the Beagle. However, some doubt was cast on this story by the fact that Darwin had never visited the island that Harriet originally came from.

[LeftInTX]

38. He's not a turtle. He's not a turtle.

[tandem5]

37. For a moment I saw "Mitch McConnell dies" and my heart skipped a beat...

damn you "when"!!!

[TomJulie]

39. Most of my family...

Most of my family are right wing and they too hate McConnell every bit as much as we do. Paul Ryan too.

[Crunchy Frog]

40. I'll pass around virtual drinks.

[Xolodno]

41. Visit is grave..

...eat some sugar free chocolates....which don't exactly agree with me.

...drop my pants, squat like I'm in the woods and release the pressure.

...oh and I am environmentally friendly, so I'll bury the toilet paper I use in the same spot.

[niyad]

42. DAMN!! for a second, I missed that first word. DON'T get my hopes up like that.

[Buns_of_Fire]

44. WARNING: It's almost impossible to dance and pee at the same time.

But I don't see any problem in making two passes.

Or even three, if you're pre-loaded by having several bean burritos the night before.

Just keep the line moving, please. We want everyone to have a shot.

Political Irrigation, Inc., Proudly Hosting Select Political Funerals Worldwide

[Donkees]

45. His Cremation Urn

[Initech]

46. The next president should get to nominate the Senate Majority Leader!

[progressoid]

47. Ha! Remember the old days of DU

when DUers would lament how we shouldn't grave dance when someone dies?

I guess we've gotten over that since we're already making plans for it!

[sharp_stick]

50. It's not grave dancing

because, unfortunately, the skeevy prick is still drawing breath.

[crazycatlady]

49. I'll borrow a dog

And have Doggy 'do its business' on the gravesite. And no plastic bag either.

[Turbineguy]

53. You'd recognize me at his funeral.

I'd be wearing a festive shirt, sipping champagne and looking for an attractive tango partner.

And I think his grave should be done in a "dance floor surrounded by urinals" motif.

[NewRedDawn]

54. Moscow Mitch

will be given a state Kremlin Funeral by Pootie. Probably interned with Lenin, Stalin, & the gang.