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Fri Apr 28, 2017, 02:27 PM

Betsy DeVos Says Media Shouldn't Emphasize First Hundred Days Because It's So Hard to Count to 100

Betsy DeVos Says Media Shouldn’t Emphasize First Hundred Days Because “It’s So Hard to Count to a Hundred”
By Andy Borowitz 11:20 A.M.

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Education Secretary Betsy DeVos criticized the media on Friday for placing so much emphasis on Donald Trump’s first hundred days, because “it’s so darn hard to count to a hundred.”

“I’m watching the news and they’re going on about a hundred days this and a hundred days that, and all I want to say is, ‘Who the heck can count all the way to a hundred?’ ” she said. “They’re acting like we’re a bunch of math geniuses.”

DeVos added that, if the media wanted to establish a benchmark for Trump’s achievement, “they should have picked a number of days that people can actually count to, like five or ten.”

The Education Secretary then demonstrated how it was possible to count to ten using one’s hands.

Despite the media’s obsession with “ridiculously big numbers,” DeVos said she has no intention of trying to count to a hundred.

“I have an important job and the last thing I need is to do something that makes my head hurt,” she said.

Andy Borowitz is the New York Times best-selling author of “The 50 Funniest American Writers,” and a comedian who has written for The New Yorker since 1998. He writes the Borowitz Report, a satirical column on the news, for newyorker.com.

http://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/betsy-devos-says-media-shouldnt-emphasize-first-hundred-days-because-its-so-hard-to-count-to-a-hundred?mbid=nl_042817%20Borowitz%20Newsletter%20(1)&CNDID=49083371&spMailingID=10913368&spUserID=MTgzMjI2MTM1NTc2S0&spJobID=1142267448&spReportId=MTE0MjI2NzQ0OAS2

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Reply Betsy DeVos Says Media Shouldn't Emphasize First Hundred Days Because It's So Hard to Count to 100 (Original post)
Amaryllis Apr 2017 OP
Yo_Mama_Been_Loggin Apr 2017 #1
ProudLib72 Apr 2017 #2
Amaryllis Apr 2017 #4
They_Live Apr 2017 #7
malaise Apr 2017 #12
maveric Apr 2017 #3
They_Live Apr 2017 #8
countryjake Apr 2017 #5
smirkymonkey Apr 2017 #6
longship Apr 2017 #9
tavernier Apr 2017 #10
Yonnie3 Apr 2017 #11
Mendocino Apr 2017 #13
Enoki33 Apr 2017 #14
JDC Apr 2017 #15

Response to Amaryllis (Original post)

Fri Apr 28, 2017, 03:19 PM

1. Not enough fingers and toes.

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Response to Amaryllis (Original post)

Fri Apr 28, 2017, 03:23 PM

2. I believed it for a minute

I really did.

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Response to ProudLib72 (Reply #2)

Fri Apr 28, 2017, 03:41 PM

4. This sentiment is being posted more and more often on DU. Reality and satire are geting more

difficult by the day to tell apart . What does this say about the state of affairs with this regime?

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Response to ProudLib72 (Reply #2)

Fri Apr 28, 2017, 04:51 PM

7. I thought it was Borowitz

but I really had to check, because it could happen.

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Response to They_Live (Reply #7)

Fri Apr 28, 2017, 05:23 PM

12. Hehehehehhe

He caught me last week

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Response to Amaryllis (Original post)

Fri Apr 28, 2017, 03:23 PM

3. Gotta be satire. ???

It gets more and more like a Mel Brooks movie every day.

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Response to maveric (Reply #3)

Fri Apr 28, 2017, 04:55 PM

8. Or A Lewis Carroll "Alice" book.

just because of the "opposite day" executive order marathon (all completely illogical), and the legislation being pushed. It all goes against common sense and reason.

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Response to Amaryllis (Original post)

Fri Apr 28, 2017, 03:43 PM

5. Bwahahahaha! Perfect! Absolutely PERFECT! n/t

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Response to Amaryllis (Original post)

Fri Apr 28, 2017, 04:08 PM

6. +1000

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Response to Amaryllis (Original post)

Fri Apr 28, 2017, 05:00 PM

9. Borowitz!!!!!



R&K

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Response to Amaryllis (Original post)

Fri Apr 28, 2017, 05:11 PM

10. Her name has ten letters... who needs more?

She was going to name her daughter Bunnie, but that would have required a toe.

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Response to Amaryllis (Original post)

Fri Apr 28, 2017, 05:14 PM

11. Snicker!!

Thanks for posting.

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Response to Amaryllis (Original post)

Fri Apr 28, 2017, 05:47 PM

13. Borowitz!

Except she can count just fine...if it's money.

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Response to Amaryllis (Original post)

Fri Apr 28, 2017, 06:03 PM

14. If Betsy DeVos has her way it will be the education policies she

so blindly advocates that will be responsible for the inability to count to one hundred. She represents something new - one of the Trump oligarchs.

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Response to Amaryllis (Original post)

Sat Apr 29, 2017, 12:02 PM

15. Man, he comes up with some great stuff

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