WOW! President Trump's 71st birthday is only TWELVE days away! What gift would YOU like to give him?

[Miles Archer]

He's done so much to make America great again in just a few short months. The least we could do is show our appreciation on his special day.

HEY...maybe he could take the day off and play a round of golf! He hardly gets to do that anymore.

[frazzled]

1. Why, of course ...

a big steaming plate of ... COVFEFE!

[Auntie Bush]

2. I have to clean dog yard and could find him many nice gifts.

[Aristus]

3. A cell and an orange jumpsuit.

[NastyRiffraff]

4. A one-way ticket to Siberia

He can learn a lot about the climate there. Plus he'll be right at home. No golf courses, though. Sorry.

[Girard442]

5. A myocardial infarction.

[smirkymonkey]

26. Funny, that was the first thing that immediately jumped to my mind.

I wonder if he has any idea how much he is despised the world over?

[bdamomma]

37. well with his unhealthy

eating habits and continually gaining weight he could be a candidate for it.

[mitch96]

42. Yes, two little atherosclerotic plaques

Just a bit smaller than the lumen so they lodge in the right and left coronary arteries. Oh and for good measure a few in the right and left carotids also...
m

[PoliticAverse]

6. The gift of retirement. n/t

[Phoenix61]

48. Yep!

A nice long one. Someplace quiet with nice comfy, padded walls.

[mnhtnbb]

7. A buzz cut and an orange jumpsuit.

[geek tragedy]

8. a 20 piece bucket from KFC with a loud noisemaker that's prone

to startling people

[underthematrix]

9. Articles of impeachment

[Kleveland]

10. Self awareness...

And a large box of Catholic guilt.....

So he could wallow in self remorse.

Suffering for the harm he is doing to the planet, and the good people of the world.... I could care less for those who put him in office....they will have their own suffering.

My first thought was a special capsule, but justice would be better served that he should survive and suffer alone.

[dalton99a]

11. An endless supply of beautiful cake with bacon

[lunasun]

12. A Hair cut. It's hideous

And wizard of oz stuff Heart, brain , courage

[dalton99a]

14. Just shave it

[Paladin]

13. My suggestions would get me thrown off the site.

I've been here for something like 16 years; I don't think I'll jeopardize my participation privileges for the likes of donald trump.

[Le Gaucher]

15. The ugliest Motherfucker ever born .. I rate him as 1/10. nt

[smirkymonkey]

27. He is absolutely hideous, isn't he?

He really makes my skin crawl. I can't even bare to look at him for more than a second or two because he repulses me that much.

[Lotusflower70]

30. You're too kind

That rating is way too high.

[NightWatcher]

16. A fucking clue

[demmiblue]

17. I would gift him an Outward Bound trip with a loooong solo experience.

The thought of him in nature with no communication to the outside world and having to fend for himself is just priceless.

[Doodley]

18. I would give him a delegation of GOPers to tell him to resign.

[Initech]

19. Early retirement.

[GoCubsGo]

20. All the Karma that is due him.

Hopefully, it leads to total humiliation and soul-sucking poverty for him and everyone associated with him. Except for his youngest kid. I hope his mom can get that poor thing away from the lot of them.

[NCTraveler]

21. Do you think My Pet Goat is a little too advanced for him? nt.

[Dave Starsky]

22. My neighbor Clover just made him a pie!

[eleny]

28. Oh, that's the best!

And she looks like she could work up a real cutie of a pie, too.

[MurrayDelph]

23. An all-expenses paid, or way trip

to Gitmo?

[Hekate]

24. A full medical workup at Walter Reed...

...including the cognitive bits. Happy birthday, Mr President.

[Sugar Smack]

25. The biggest, RICHEST, beautifulest, superior chocolate cake in the history of history.

and one of those rolling Hannibal Lecter outfits to restrain him.

[Vinca]

29. I know, but I'm not sure how to get it to arrive steaming.

[SummerSnow]

31. A bottle of cologne that smells god..until you spray it on you then it smells like poop

[The Blue Flower]

32. Starvation and imprisonment

In that order.

[annabanana]

33. a one-way ticket to anywhere. . . n/t

[CozyMystery]

34. I'd like to give him 3 months...

of living with an average American family, none of whom voted for him or support his presidency. He can bring all of his possessions he can fit into a regular backpack, except for money.

He wants to eat, he'll have to cook and shop for food. IOW, he'll be part of the household -- another adult to carry the burden. He'll do chores, laundry, etc.

He'll share a bathroom. He'll sit on furniture made of particleboard and cardboard. He'll sleep on the couch.

He can make money by working at minimum wage. Maybe the family will pay him to mow the lawn -- or deduct it from his share of expenses. All his income will be from him working for it.

No cell phone... he won't deserve it. No access to his family, friends, acquaintances or Putin. No internet.

No Secret Service or bodyguards ... none of the trappings of his current life.

He gets sick, no healthcare. He will just have to be sick.

No access to guns -- we don't want him to kill himself. Do we?

We'll bring Obama back to fill in for him. (This is a fantasy, remember.)

[4139]

35. That same thing Santa gives him at Christmas...

A lump of coal

[bdamomma]

36. what an ugly

POS he is. I would like to give him a padded room.

[sdfernando]

38. A Massive Myocardial Infarction‎ /NT

[WinkyDink]

39. Dire poverty. India-train-platform poverty. Brazilian garbage-heap poverty.

[redstatebluegirl]

40. Articles of Impeachment, hands down.

[enid602]

41. Gift

A pair of tweezers and a magnifying glass would be a great gift for Melania.

[benld74]

43. Terrible rash that won't respond to treatment

Let someone else choose the spot

[Mad-in-Mo]

44. Minnie Jackson's special pie

[world wide wally]

45. 20 to life

[Takket]

46. Bread and water

[Yo_Mama_Been_Loggin]

47. A set of suspensors

Since it's so hard for him to walk any distance.