Courtesy of Time Magazine's transcript, best groaner moments from Trump's Boy Scout Jamboree

[Miles Archer]

19th Boy Scout Jamboree, wow, and to address such a tremendous group. Boy, you have a lot of people here. The press will say it's about 200 people.
(LAUGHTER)
It looks like about 45,000 people. You set a record today.
(APPLAUSE)
You set a record. That's a great honor, believe me.
Tonight we put aside all of the policy fights in Washington, D.C. you've been hearing about with the fake news and all of that.

***

You know, I go to Washington and I see all these politicians, and I see the swamp, and it's not a good place. In fact, today, I said we ought to change it from the word "swamp" to the word "cesspool" or perhaps to the word "sewer."
(APPLAUSE)
But it's not good. Not good. And I see what's going on. And believe me, I'd much rather be with you, that I can tell you.

***

The vice president of the United States, Mike Pence -- a good guy -- was a Scout, and it meant so much to him.
(APPLAUSE)
Some of you here tonight might even have camped out in this yard when Mike was the governor of Indiana, but the scouting was very, very important.
And by the way, where are our Indiana scouts tonight?
(APPLAUSE)

***

Secretary Tom Price is also here today. Dr. Price still lives the Scout oath, helping to keep millions of Americans strong and healthy as our secretary of Health and Human Services. And he's doing a great job. And hopefully he's going to gets the votes tomorrow to start our path toward killing this horrible thing known as Obamacare that's really hurting us.
(APPLAUSE)
CROWD: USA! USA! USA!
TRUMP: By the way, are you going to get the votes? He better get them. He better get them. Oh, he better. Otherwise I'll say, "Tom, you're fired." I'll get somebody.
(APPLAUSE)
He better get Senator Capito to vote for it. He better get the other senators to vote for it. It's time.
You know, after seven years of saying repeal and replace Obamacare we have a chance to now do it. They better do it. Hopefully they'll do it.

***

As the Scout law says, a scout is trustworthy, loyal -- we could use some more loyalty I will tell that you that.
(CROWD CHANTING)

***

I'm waving to people back there so small I can't even see them. Man, this is a lot of people. Turn those cameras back there, please. That is so incredible.
By the way, what do you think the chances are that this incredible massive crowd, record setting, is going to be shown on television tonight? One percent or zero?
(APPLAUSE)
The fake media will say, "President Trump spoke" -- you know what is -- "President Trump spoke before a small crowd of Boy Scouts today." That's some -- that is some crowd. Fake media. Fake news.
Thank you. And I'm honored by that. By the way, all of you people that can't even see you, so thank you. I hope you can hear.

***

And he went out and bought a big yacht, and he had a very interesting life. I won't go any more than that, because you're Boy Scouts so I'm not going to tell you what he did.
(CROWD CHANTING)
Should I tell you? Should I tell you?
(APPLAUSE)
You're Boy Scouts, but you know life. You know life.
So look at you. Who would think this is the Boy Scouts, right?

***

(APPLAUSE) And you know, we have a tremendous disadvantage in the Electoral College. Popular vote is much easier. We have -- because New York, California, Illinois, you have to practically run the East Coast. And we did. We won Florida. We won South Carolina. We won North Carolina. We won Pennsylvania.
(APPLAUSE)
We won and won. So when they said, there is no way to victory; there is no way to 270. You know I went to Maine four times because it's one vote, and we won. We won. One vote. I went there because I kept hearing we're at 269. But then Wisconsin came in. Many, many years. Michigan came in.
(APPLAUSE)
So -- and we worked hard there. You know, my opponent didn't work hard there, because she was told...
(BOOING)
She was told she was going to win Michigan, and I said, well, wait a minute. The car industry is moving to Mexico. Why is she going to move -- she's there. Why are they allowing it to move? And by the way, do you see those car industry -- do you see what's happening? They're coming back to Michigan. They're coming back to Ohio. They're starting to peel back in.
(APPLAUSE)
And we go to Wisconsin, now, Wisconsin hadn't been won in many, many years by a Republican. But we go to Wisconsin, and we had tremendous crowds. And I'd leave these massive crowds, I'd say, why are we going to lose this state?
The polls, that's also fake news. They're fake polls. But the polls are saying -- but we won Wisconsin.
(APPLAUSE)

***

And by the way, under the Trump administration you'll be saying "Merry Christmas" again when you go shopping, believe me.
(APPLAUSE)
Merry Christmas.
They've been downplaying that little beautiful phrase. You're going to be saying "Merry Christmas" again, folks.
(APPLAUSE)

http://time.com/4872118/trump-boy-scout-jamboree-speech-transcript/

[DetlefK]

1. "we have a tremendous disadvantage in the Electoral College. Popular vote is much easier."

And that's how he won the Electoral College and lost the popular vote...



Dementia. My verdict is dementia.

[secondwind]

3. I agree 100%.

[Dave Starsky]

19. No. He's just a goddamn compulsive liar.

He knows what he's doing.

[Vinca]

2. The Boy Scouts would have to look long and hard for a worse role model to speak.

Did Don tell them about his pussy grabbing adventures? If not, it's only because it slipped through the word salad.

[C_U_L8R]

4. Poisoning children's minds

Go away Trump

[jberryhill]

5. Does he believe he is responsible for the crowd size?

[Bernardo de La Paz]

6. He praises William Levitt -- racist home builder -- for being rich.

Segregation

Levitt refused to integrate his developments. The Jewish Levitt barred Jews from Strathmore, his first pre-Levittown development on Long Island in New York, and he refused to sell his homes to blacks. His sales contracts also forbade the resale of properties to blacks through restrictive covenants, although in 1957 a white couple resold their house to the first black family to live in a Levitt home. Levitt's all-white policies also led to civil rights protests in Bowie, Maryland in 1963.[8][9] The National Association for the Advancement of Colored People and the American Civil Liberties Union opposed Levitt’s racist policies, and the Federal Housing Administration prepared to refuse mortgages on his next Levittown. Nevertheless, Levitt would not back down and continued planning another whites-only Levittown in Willingboro Township, New Jersey. He fought legal challenges in New Jersey courts until the United States Supreme Court refused to hear his case.[13]

The 2003 PBS series Race: The Power of an Illusion, by California Newsreel, features Levittown and nearby Roosevelt in documenting systemic racism in the development of the early suburbs.

-- Wikipedia

[GreenEyedLefty]

7. Jesus Christ, what an incoherent boob.

But we already know this, right? Honestly perhaps it's time to put our energy and focus on Congress and supporting candidates who can formulate actual sentences and promote sensible policies.

[orangecrush]

8. This joker poisons

Everything he touches.

[zentrum]

9. This is horrifying

.....on so many levels, I can hardly keep count.

[yuiyoshida]

10. SOME Men Like to watch the World Burn....

[workinclasszero]

20. Disaster Capitalism

rules Trump's Amerika.

[bitterross]

11. It's Pathological - He Couldn't Stop if IF he wanted to - he doesn't

It works for him, obviously.

[Tommy_Carcetti]

12. Reading this, I'm reminded of the one unironically funny thing George W. Bush ever said in his life:

"That was some weird shit."

[Moral Compass]

13. What a turd

Still on the campaign after all this time.

The man is utterly mad.

To make these kinds of comments to a crowd of boys and parents and turn it into some sort of fascist youth rally.

Every day he shows us that he has zero sense of propriety, of good and evil...

How he disgusts me.

[Worktodo]

14. Some additional odd excerpts.

This is from same transcript---

He got bored with this life of yachts, and sailing, and all of the things he did in the south of France and other places. You won't get bored, right? You know, truthfully, you're workers. You'll get bored too, believe me. Of course having a few good years like that isn't so bad.

And...

I saw him at a cocktail party. And it was very sad because the hottest people in New York were at this party. It was the party of Steve Ross -- Steve Ross, who was one of the great people. He came up and discovered, really founded Time Warner, and he was a great guy. He had a lot of successful people at the party.

[YCHDT]

15. Fuckin creep ... Don't leave your kids with this guy

[Blue_Tires]

16. I'm angry enough to stab somebody right now

Link to tweet

Yeah, yeah I know... Something about e-mails, being unpopular, not going to Wisconsin, a foundation, "economic concerns", etc... Just skip it.

[Lars39]

18. Contrast and balm...President Obama's address to jamboree:

https://m.

[Nanjeanne]

17. I kept waiting for them to start singing Tomorrow Belongs To Me.