Parent Now Just Typing 4-Year-Old Childs Every Word Verbatim Throughout Day As Facebook Post

[madokie]

theOnion:

GRAND BLANC, MI—In updates that reportedly were becoming both increasingly frequent and less interesting with every new addition, local woman Kate Morris was now just typing her 4-year-old child’s every word verbatim throughout the day as Facebook posts, sources said Thursday. “I’m hungry. Can I have a snack?” wrote Morris, who had already spent several hours of her afternoon directly transcribing her child’s every passing thought and nonsensical whim exactly as she uttered them approximately every 8-14 seconds. “Can I have some apple juice now? No, milk! No, apple juice! Noooooooo! Not in that cup! I want my Spider-Man cup. Mommy, look at me now, I’m a ghost! Mommy look! Look Mommy!’” At press time, sources reported that Morris had spent the last half hour posting nothing but “Waaaaaaaaah! Waaaaaaaaah! Waaaaaaaaah!” as she struggled to put her daughter down for her midday nap.


http://www.theonion.com/article/parent-now-just-typing-4-year-old-childs-every-wor-56676?utm_medium=RSS&utm_campaign=feeds&utm_source=TheOnion_Daily_RSS&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=&utm_term=

[Tommy_Carcetti]

1. I might actually try that. nt

[lunasun]

2. A joke that may or may not be based on real life people

[Atman]

3. This is an Onion piece. But I actually have a FB friend who does something close.

She posts her very young son's "Stories" every day, often several times a day. She even published two volumes in book form, and people eat it up. The kid gets fan mail. What can I say? It's Facebook.

Here is an example:

Once upon a time, there was as giant bubble that surrounded the Earth. The bubble was the atmosphere. It was full of oxygen, gravity, and white bunny clouds that protected the Earth.

The End.


There are volumes of this stuff.

[Luciferous]

6. This why I don't do Facebook or most social

media. Why do people feel the need to document this crap? When we were on vacation we were having dinner at a pizza place and there was this other family there with 3 or 4 kids. The parents were both taking a ton of pictures and when their food came the mom actually slapped the kid's hand away from the plate so she could get a picture! And don't even get me started on selfies lol

I think I'm becoming a grumpy old lady, but people are just so ridiculous and self-absorbed these days and social media makes it worse.

[maxrandb]

4. How can we tell this apart from Trumps Twitter feed? n/t

[NanceGreggs]

5. LOL!!! n/t

[Heartstrings]

7. This! Nt

[dalton99a]

8. +1