Kelly Limerick (Thread)

[bigtree]

Limericking? @Limericking

John Kelly, who optimists thought
Would use the position he got
To try to begin
To make the admin
Less generally awful, did not.

[Bob Loblaw]

1. This

Donald Trump orders, "Roll over Kelly",
So he does and Trump scratches his belly,
"They thought you were large,
That somehow you'd take charge,
But I've turned your resolve in to jelly."

[iwillalwayswonderwhy]

2. Heres mine

So Trump tweeted out “whoa Nellie”,
Obama never called John Kelly,
Then lies, lies, lies, lies, lies, lies,
Lies, lies, lies, lies, lies, lies,
Then he sat down to watch Fox on the telly.

[Tommy_Carcetti]

3. Soul-sucker.

[lagomorph777]

4. Said Kelly to Trump on the toilet

Last edited Fri Oct 20, 2017, 10:51 PM - Edit history (1)

It's better to stroke if you oil it
But if urine to peeing
Like reports I've been seeing
For me that would totally spoil it

[DFW]

5. Too tempting not to play!

That poor, tired Kelly boy John
Had wished Donald’s vanity gone
But he looked at that hair
And began to despair
And said, “making this work is not on.”

[world wide wally]

6. Trump was an ass as he'd shown

They said we can't leave him alone
So they hired Gen.l K.
Keep and eye on him so they would say
And Trump turned the General into his clone

[Cyrano]

7. Sorry, I'm not buying it

Last edited Fri Oct 20, 2017, 05:21 PM - Edit history (1)

I believe Kelly is an honorable man. And I won't add a Kelly limerick.

He lost a son in war. Nothing is worse than losing a child.

I believe that Kelly is trying everything possible to save America from Trump's insanity.

I can't explain all of his remarks. Perhaps he's stretching his imagination in order to, to some degree, make Trump's inhumanity acceptable to a degree.

Nonetheless, I'm glad that Kelly is there. He just may be the only person who is stopping Trump from launching nukes. Think what you will of him. But that one issue is enough to forgive him for whatever views he may or may not believe and has voiced.

[lame54]

9. You're wrong...

Snap out of it

[Cyrano]

11. I won't argue with you about losing a child

Beyond that, believe what you will.

But composing limericks about Kelly is as dishonorable. It's in a league with any of the garbage that spews from Trump's mouth.

[SunSeeker]

13. "Stretching" to "make Trump's inhumanity acceptable to a degree" is NOT "honorable."

[Tommy_Carcetti]

14. Yesterday was a game changer for me. He stood there and lied and defamed a person, just for Trump.

If his mission was to hold the worst of Trump in check, it's quite obvious he's failed at this point.

He's dug himself into the same hole that Trump has, and dirtied himself with the same mud Trump has.

He needs to save whatever face is left and resign.

[rebe303]

19. Amen

You are spot on, Sir.

[uponit7771]

20. +1

[Ilsa]

16. I used to feel the way you did. Not any more.

He's intentionally lying about the Congresswoman.

He's intentionally deflecting attention from the military action and orders that caused these deaths.

He thinks a twenty-something pregnant mother of two should feel the same way over losing her sargent husband as he did when he lost his son, even though he was in his fifties, had been in this career for decades, and took comfort in the knowledge that every high-ranking official knew of his family's loss.

My father served 2 years in WW2. When he died, we received a certificate "signed" by Obama, even though it was 60 years later. It meant a lot to us that his service was recognized. Kelly said that acknowledgment by the president doesn't matter to the Gold Star family. It does.

[mountain grammy]

32. We have a letter signed by LBJ

Thanking my father for his service..WWII and Korea, 16 years a Marine, died in 1958. Got the letter in 1965. Yes, it means something.

Kelly seems to think no Americans except him and his pals have skin in this game.

[WinkyDink]

24. A dead child does not confer honor upon a parent. Kelly is now a proven despicable LIAR, a

racist, a misogynist, and an insane Dominionist.

He threw away whatever honor he had, to support the agenda of the dangerous idiot in the White House, a man who has insulted, defamed, or outright ignored our KIA soldiers.

[Whiskeytide]

31. He may have been an honorable soldier...

... and I am truly sorry for his loss.

But he's a politician now. And his blatant, outright lie about congresswoman Wilson was dishonorable and despicable. He told the lie as an eye witness to the event. It wasn't something he "heard" from someone else. It was a politicaly motivated lie, pure and simple. That deserves zero respect.

He didn't have to do it. He didn't have to call the press conference. He could have remained silent. He chose to bring dishonor upon himself.

He's not a decent man.

[rgbecker]

38. https://www.aclu.org/other/john-kelly-facts

Guy's a jerk. Limerick him out of town with the rest of the GOP.

[lame54]

8. He once had a distinguished career...

He once had a distinguished career
But now he whispers in the presidents ear
And when he addresses the nation
Pure flagellation
As if he's talking out of Trump's rear

[bigtree]

37. flatulation?

...(sp)

[drmeow]

40. Flagellation

Flagellation (Latin flagellum, 'whip'), flogging, whipping or lashing is the act of beating the human body with special implements such as whips, lashes, rods, switches, the cat o' nine tails, the sjambok, etc. Typically, flogging is imposed on an unwilling subject as a punishment; however, it can also be submitted to willingly, or performed on oneself, in religious or sadomasochistic contexts.

[bigtree]

41. the rhyme indicated flatulence

...virtually no reference to whipping.

Pure (flatulation)
As if he's talking out of Trump's rear

[lame54]

10. It has become a common belief...

It has become a common belief
That Kelly would bring us relief
But as his nose grows
From what the video shows
He's delusional as the Commander in Chief

[yortsed snacilbuper]

12. here's mine

Kelly crawled on his belly
trump took a dump
Kelly closed his eye
and tried to grab trumps tie

[Cyrano]

15. Oh, stop it

You're talking about an honorable U.S. General who lost a son in war, and is trying his best to prevent a lunatic from getting us into a nuclear holocaust.

His remarks about the horrible incident which is soiling the country were inappropriate.

But please don't spit on a man who spent most of his life defending America.

[Ilsa]

17. Kelly is spending his capital and reputation poorly. nt

[yortsed snacilbuper]

18. I spent 24 years in the military,

I wouldn't salute Kelly, sorry about his son though.

[yortsed snacilbuper]

21. After Video Refutes Kellys Charges, Congresswoman Raises Issue of Race

Video of a 2015 speech delivered by Representative Frederica S. Wilson revealed Friday that John F. Kelly, the White House chief of staff, misrepresented her remarks when he accused her of bragging about securing $20 million for a South Florida F.B.I. building and twisting President Barack Obama’s arm.

Mr. Kelly, escalating a feud between Mr. Trump and Ms. Wilson, had cast the congresswoman on Thursday as a publicity-seeking opportunist. However, the video, released by The Sun Sentinel, a newspaper in South Florida, showed that during her nine-minute speech, Ms. Wilson never took credit for getting the money for the building, only for helping pass legislation naming the building after two fallen federal agents.

https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/politics/after-video-refutes-kelly%E2%80%99s-charges-congresswoman-raises-issue-of-race/ar-AAtLLI9?li=BBmkt5R&ocid=spartanntp

[Ilsa]

34. And she gave Speaker Boehner credit for getting

it done expeditiously.

[WinkyDink]

26. See the man clearly.

[JI7]

36. he spit on his own reputation with his vile attack on a good woman in order to defend a scumbag

nothing anyone else does can come near the damage he has done to himself with what he has done.

[yortsed snacilbuper]

22. kelly trump traitors

Kelly is a lying piece of shit
trump wants to grab some pu$$y
Kelly bangs an empty drum
trump plays golf while our soldiers die
Kelly thinks women are sacred,
as long as they are white

[WinkyDink]

27. I don't think you've got the limerick form mastered quite yet.

[yortsed snacilbuper]

23. lying liar

kelly believes in god
trump thinks he is god
Kelly lied about congresswoman Wilson
sara Huckabee sanders swore to it
four star Kelly is a disgrace to to marine corp
trump is a bore

[Corvo Bianco]

28. A boor

[milestogo]

25. 2 full barrels of SHIT

[bigtree]

29. Walked away from this Kelly thread thinking

Lack of interest would see this post sinking
But when I came back
I found it was packed
With verse sure to start Kelly drinking!

[Corvo Bianco]

30. :)

A minority-oppressing Republican man
Salutes at Trump's side: "I'll do whatever I can!"
If you find it appalling
That he dishonors the fallen
STOP EXPECTING GOOD THINGS FROM RACISTS, GODDAMN!

[bigtree]

33. kick

[JI7]

35. Trump looks fucking disgusting in that picture

[yortsed snacilbuper]

39. trumpster

trump beats Kelly like a rented mule
but Kelly just keeps feeding us his bull
sara the huskter says don't question four stars
but you can't always trust people with bars
Kelly will become a pariah
and trump will call him my geramiah

[yortsed snacilbuper]

42. tictac

Donny and Johnnie went up the hill
To get a find journalist to kill
Kelly said the idiots will believe my pitch
Trump said you're my favorite bit(h
Kelly and trump are fric and frac
They like to eat their tic and tac