How Woman Think Men Pee

[Grassy Knoll]

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

1. Yeah, pretty much.

[Plucketeer]

2. I take STRONG exception to this!

I have NEVER gotten the toilet paper wet!

[HubertHeaver]

6. You're just not old enough.

It'll happen, just have to live long enough

[Plucketeer]

23. Maybe more than that...

is the fact that we live on several acres in the country. Probably 50% of the time, I water a tree or some weeds. It IS California after all and we need to conserve every flush tank's worth of water that we can!

[HubertHeaver]

32. Water Conservation! Yeah, next time I get caught watering the lawn

I'll claim water conservation.

[Xipe Totec]

3. Nearly peed myself watching. nt

[DreamGypsy]

4. How naive ....

...don't they know about:

The Backwards Over the Shoulder Shot
The Forward Facing Ceiling Bounce
Or, drum roll, please,
The Four Walls and a Floor Ricochet

Piss - I clean the bathrooms in our house.

[HubertHeaver]

8. I used to clean bathroom at a university.

The worst for sprayed/dribbled urine was the bathroom used by the old male business school professors.

[Delver Rootnose]

15. I used to clean up....

...gas a station bathroom when I was in college. The men were consistently more messy in the dribs and drabs, little bits here and there but the most notable huge messes were made by woman not wanting to sit on the seat and spraying everywhere. Except the time someone smeared shit on the walls in the men's room. But that was intentional vandalism not casual disregard.

[HubertHeaver]

18. Age-related prostrate issues are rather messy.

The professors, at least, washed their hands before leaving the room. Computer programmers didn't.

[Half-Century Man]

9. Long arc, boner, hail mary, in a short motel bathroom, trick shot.

Difficulty, 9
Range, 1to3 meters
Frequency of occurrence/success, (18-22) 12%, (22-35) 40%, (41-59) 75% (due to lower arch), (60+) not an issue.

[Duckfan]

5. Nice to see someone addressing this myth

[Snarkoleptic]

7. The reality of morning-after-sex pee is more like...

or not...

[Bubzer]

10. I have no idea why I find this so amusing.

[3catwoman3]

11. If you've ever shone a blacklight...

...in a bathroom used mostly by the males in the family, this doesn't seem too far off.

I am the only one in the house with 2 X chromosomes.

[flamingdem]

12. I was afraid to watch this

but

[BlueJazz]

13. Being a male, I thought the dude had some pretty damn good control. Wish I was that accurate.

[Maynar]

14. Gee, just

a TAD exaggerated, eh?

[840high]

16. Not if you knew my

father-in-law. May he rest in peace.

[Vestigial_Sister]

17. Just imagine...

if he hadn't been dehydrated.

[Spitfire of ATJ]

19. Damn Coors.

[beergood]

20. she forgot

the morning wood arch.

[Depaysement]

21. As they say in yankee parts . . .

That's a wicked pissah!

[Enthusiast]

22. Seriously now, this is why law enforcement shouldn't be so quick to arrest men for

pissing in the bushes.

It's always seen as indecent exposure when all the men were doing is taking a piss.

Pissing in the bushes is liberating. No toilet seat to raise. You can just let it fly. And it waters the plants too!

[OxQQme]

24. My 'male dominant' toilet seat is spring loaded

to be always up unless it's being sat upon. The lid is heavy enough to hold everything down if needed.

[Enthusiast]

25. I didn't know their existence.

[MindPilot]

26. I'll bet every cop who arrested someone for public urination has done it himself.

And think about it, not like a cop is in an office and the toilet is just down the hall.

[Enthusiast]

27. I didn't think of that....

[tularetom]

28. One of the nice things about being a guy living in the country

is being able to pee off the porch into the azaleas.

As I get older, I've even thought about building a deck off the upstairs bedroom so I don't have to walk all the way to the bathroom at 3 in the morning.

[WhoIsNumberNone]

29. Wait... You mean that's not normal?

[Laffy Kat]

30. What's with the eggs?

That's the only part I don't get. Other than that--having raised two boys--it seems pretty accurate.

[hedgehog]

31. My mother had the walls of the bathroom painted black with little gold specks

[OhZone]

33. That's the way I figured.

Is that not right?