Any advice on what to do with a deadbeat relative?

[Archae]

She owes me $170.

And EVERY time she just makes excuses or simply disappears for days, on payday.

I have no receipts, and she's alienated everyone else in my family, due to broken promises after borrowing money.

[Kali]

1. consider it an educational expense

with bonus deadbeat repellent. if they bother you ever again bring up what they owe but forget about ever getting it back in reality.

[Adsos Letter]

2. Wise advice.

Speaking from personal experience here.

[PoiBoy]

5. +1,000,000...

This is excellent advice.... and a considerably cheap lesson...

[Nay]

12. This. I am also speaking from personal experience. Oh, and never lend them more money,

no matter how 'dire' a situation. I hope I didn't have to write that last part . . .

[unc70]

3. Never lend what you can't give or forgive

[customerserviceguy]

4. Lending to family

is essentially giving a gift.

My ex and I borrowed $3K from her brother in 1979 to use as a down payment on a home, and we paid him back in full with interest, but I think we were the exception to the rule.

Stop facilitating this individual, and if you can live with it, cut her out of your life. You'll be much happier if you do so.

[Hoyt]

6. Kiss it goodbye, and don't lend anymore. If you enjoy her otherwise, just tell her

it’s a gift, but don’t ask again.

Of course, easier said than done.

[Laffy Kat]

7. Kiss the cash good-bye.

Chalk it up to a lesson learned.

[Wounded Bear]

8. If you lend someone $20 and never see them again...

It was probably worth it.

Sounds like you just paid for the privelege of ignoring her in the future.

[California_Republic]

9. For your mental health considered a gift

For your mental health considered a gift

And don’t do it again

[Major Nikon]

10. I never lend money to anyone

People who ask to borrow money from family or friends generally do so because a bank won't lend them the money and there's generally a reason for that. If they really need money, I will give it to them. Not worth the anguish of not getting it back.

I always say do a thousand good deeds and nobody will ever remember you, but if you borrow money and don't pay them back they will never forget you.

[Fla Dem]

11. I hate to say it, but you knew what she was before you lent her the money.

Last edited Fri Jun 7, 2019, 10:28 AM - Edit history (1)

"she's alienated everyone else in my family, due to broken promises after borrowing money."

Take your losses and avoid her in the future.

[Floyd R. Turbo]

13. I have several relatives that owe me money. I don't communicate with them at all, nor will I until

I’m paid back.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

14. Ditto to all the other posts.

If you like her otherwise, just let it go but don't lend her another dime, and tell her exactly why if she asks for another loan. If you don't like her otherwise, tell her you don't want to be a sucker again for a known deadbeat.

[hunter]

15. Never lend money to friends, family, or lovers.

You can give them all the money you like. Maybe you'll get it back, maybe not.

Don't attach strings, emotional or otherwise, to the money you give.

Don't be shocked if they spend it all on beer, at the racetrack, or on stupid shit like indoor plumbing, radios, and aircraft company stocks.

Don't be sullen if they double the money and give back only what you gave. The cruel fates will take them in the end.

You knew what you were doing.

I can't imagine arguing with relatives about money.

My great grandmas were all steely eyed women of the Wild West, skilled with guns and knives and sharp words. They taught us well.

Or maybe we're just afraid they'd come back from the dead and kill us if we didn't take their advice.