My scheduler can be amusing: "Cute respitory hyploxia".

[Aristus]

That's what a patient is coming in for today.

Now, I don't know what that is, but it sounds pretty serious...

[TEB]

1. Do you still have to

Ask people to get a flu shot

[Aristus]

2. Yeah, but I've given up trying to convince the antivaxxers.

Once they've exhausted the Jim Carrey-approved talking points, they just say "I just don't want to".

Now I just tell them if they're not going to follow my medical advice, get it somewhere else.

[Ohiogal]

3. As opposed to

“Homely respitory hypoxia”?

[Aristus]

4. Evidently...

[Ohiogal]

5. Hey, if I have to get an illness,

I want one that makes me “cute”!

[Aristus]

6. You and me both.

I want one of the Hollywood illnesses that causes one to grow more beautiful as death approaches...

[Ohiogal]

11. Like Ali MacGraw in "Love Story"!

[Aristus]

12. Exactly.

I think that's the trope-namer right there.

I'm not saying I want to look like Ali McGraw when I die. Looking like Bradley Cooper will do...

[Ohiogal]

13. Okay,

Your disease can make you look like Bradley Cooper and I’ll come down with something that makes me look like Scarlett Johansson.... Well be the most attractive sick people ever!

[Aristus]

14. When we're laying in our coffins, our mourners can say:

"They've never looked so beautiful...


Wait......is that even Bob at all? He looks like Bradley Cooper! Who's his undertaker?"

[Ohiogal]

15. The undertaker can put a sign out

Like home remodelers, advertising their work! “Another Great Makeup Job By....”

And believe me, it would take a miracle worker to make me look like Scarlett Johansson!

[irisblue]

17. Now Voyager was dying pretty too

[unblock]

7. ok let's break this down:

hyploxia is obviously the condition of being low on smoked salmon.

respitory is when you get a break of in a long-running, unpleasant condition -- a brief respite, respitory.

so a respitory hyploxia is when you finally get some smoked salmon after being low on it for a while.

and if it's cute, it sounds like this patient is coming in for a smoked salmon hors d'oeuvre.



or maybe i've got it backwards, and they are on a steady diet of smoked salmon, and being temporarily low on it is respitory.

but i'm not sure how that could be cute....

[Aristus]

8. No, I'm sure that's it exactly.

Excellent!

[matt819]

9. Serious, maybe, but your scheduler thinks it's cute

Is this a case of autocorrect at work? Or does your scheduler need a little work on accurately describing medical conditions?

[Aristus]

10. The second one, I think.

I had a scheduler once who entered things like "patient has a couph, and a pain on her tounge,"

[wishstar]

16. I processed a claim that described their disability as "Obeast" and another one for "Fleabitis"

Sad but true