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Related: Culture Forums, Support ForumsA used car salesman in DC was in big trouble with his boss because, in order to sell a late model
Bentley to a young oil sheik, he had accepted a camel as a $1,000 trade-in.
"We will never unload that stupid camel!" the sales manager roared. "If you can't move it for a grand by the end of the day, you'll be unemployed!"
"I'll----think of----something-----" the salesman mumbled and then strolled outside onto the lot---where he recognized Matt Gaetz and Louie Gohmert inspecting an old rusty Gremlin that had been on the lot forever. "Can I help you?" he asked cheerfully.
"Yes," Gohmert responded, "we are looking for cheap reliable transportation."
"Nothing fancy" Gaetz added "We don't care what it looks like as long as it ain't very pricey. We only have $1200 to spend."
As calmly as he could manage, the salesman smiled and said "I think I have something that meets all your requirements PLUS it is extremely cheap to operate! Wait here just a moment." He then ducked behind the building and soon reappeared leading the camel.
"You can't be serious!" Gaetz said. "NOBODY rides a camel in this country!"
"But, haven't you guys made names for yourselves by ignoring what is normal? Haven't you both just done things "your way" without being compelled to be like everyone else?"
"You know---" Louie said slowly, almost thoughtfully, "I think he has a point. But, I just don't know. Neither of us has ever "driven" a camel."
"Tell you what---the salesman responded, "I understand your reluctance, but I am so sure you will love this ride that I will offer you a special deal. Buy the camel for $1200 and ride it off the lot. If you love it, keep it. But, if for any reason you are dissatisfied, return it by closing time---5:00 p.m.---and I'll fully refund your money."
That was the clincher. Matt and Louie each peeled off six Ben Franklin's and the pair rode away smiling.
The salesman was nervous all the rest of the day, but when 4:00 p.m. came and went he began to smile to himself and wondered if he'd get a bonus for not just selling the camel, but making a profit. But, then, at 4:55, he spotted Gaetz and Gohmert stumbling breathlessly onto the lot on foot.
"We want our money back!" Matt demanded.
"But, where---" began the salesman, scanning the street, "---is the camel?"
"We don't know where it ran away to! We just want our refund!" Louie answered.
"How in the world did it 'run away' if you were on it?" the salesman asked.
Here, they glanced at each other and shuffled their feet before Matt began: "We were stopped in traffic at a red light when some loudmouth in a convertible hollered 'Look at those two assholes on that camel!"
"So, naturally," Louie continued, "we got off and walked behind the camel and lifted his tail to see them and----the damn light turned green and the camel took off with the traffic. Haven't seen it since!"
Marie Marie
(9,999 posts)Talitha
(6,581 posts)Yep, they're stupid enough to do it.
Thanks for the laugh, Atticus!!
Yo_Mama_Been_Loggin
(107,881 posts)Using Gohmert and Gaetz in it is a clever touch.
jmowreader
(50,552 posts)Donald Trump, Mitch McConnell and a Secret Service agent named Joe became good buddies. Theyd golf together and go to McDonalds to dine.
One day, Joe got hit by a bus so hard he was turned into a pile of goo. The police came to investigate.
Did he have any scars or distinguishing marks? the officer asked.
McConnell said, no, he was just an ordinary guy.
Trump said, he had two assholes.
Mr. President, how would you know that?
Trump smiled and said, see that McDonalds over there? Every night we would go there to have hamberders and Diet Cokes...and every night the manager would yell out, Look sharp crew, here comes Joe with the two assholes.