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Myrina

(12,296 posts)
Sun Jul 15, 2012, 09:19 PM Jul 2012

Ever get to that point in your life ....

... Where you just want to get in your car/ whatever mode of transport & head anywhere - as far away as possible - from where you currently are?

I don't know who the hell's life I landed in, but it sucks and sure as hell isn't the one I ordered when I was a teenager.

23 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
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Ever get to that point in your life .... (Original Post) Myrina Jul 2012 OP
i am sorry. i wish you could...... seabeyond Jul 2012 #1
Yes, been there. texanwitch Jul 2012 #2
No. I've moved a lot in my life. And I hate to travel. I have dreams of becoming a hermit sometimes. Honeycombe8 Jul 2012 #3
If there's anything I've learned in my 58 yrs, it's this: Honeycombe8 Jul 2012 #4
Just the opposite. HereSince1628 Jul 2012 #5
Yeah, we therapists call it "The geographic cure". It doesn't work. nolabear Jul 2012 #6
"Never leave the problem until you're forced from it The Blessing." turtlerescue1 Jul 2012 #7
no matter where you go There You are. - Tuesday Afternoon Jul 2012 #8
I feel that way everyday. Joe Shlabotnik Jul 2012 #9
Bingo, thats exactly it! Myrina Jul 2012 #10
Me, too.... Wounded Bear Jul 2012 #11
And absolutely NOTHING to look forward too. Only things ending up worse. That's how it works out. SammyWinstonJack Jul 2012 #20
You took the words right outta my mouth. blueamy66 Jul 2012 #12
Yeah, I did that when I was 18. Ended up sleeping in the car in the parking garage of a mall. HopeHoops Jul 2012 #13
Sometimes I get on I-5 to go a relatively short distance Arugula Latte Jul 2012 #14
Yeah, but then I remember that I haven't had a full tank of gas... Wounded Bear Jul 2012 #15
... so when you run outta gas, that's your new home ... Myrina Jul 2012 #16
If I was forty years younger, I might ...... Wounded Bear Jul 2012 #21
yes LiberalEsto Jul 2012 #17
dosnt matter where you go, you will still be there loli phabay Jul 2012 #18
Nearly every day. SammyWinstonJack Jul 2012 #19
If it were just me, or just me and the wife ... Kennah Jul 2012 #22
Thank you Myrina Jul 2012 #23
 

seabeyond

(110,159 posts)
1. i am sorry. i wish you could......
Sun Jul 15, 2012, 09:20 PM
Jul 2012

i have not felt that in a couple decades. gonna find some wood to knock on.

peace to you....

texanwitch

(18,705 posts)
2. Yes, been there.
Sun Jul 15, 2012, 09:26 PM
Jul 2012

Just finished I hope that part of my life.


I found one thing that made me happy and held on to it.

Best of luck.

There is light at the end of the tunnel, even if you can't see it yet.

Just try to hang on.

Honeycombe8

(37,648 posts)
3. No. I've moved a lot in my life. And I hate to travel. I have dreams of becoming a hermit sometimes.
Sun Jul 15, 2012, 09:31 PM
Jul 2012

Retreating from the world, eating jelly beans while watching movies. But dream of getting in my car and leaving? That'd be the last thing I'd want to do.

What is so wrong that you feel that way?

Honeycombe8

(37,648 posts)
4. If there's anything I've learned in my 58 yrs, it's this:
Sun Jul 15, 2012, 09:35 PM
Jul 2012

If you don't like what's going on....wait. It is a certainty that things will change.

"All things must pass."

That is a good thing to remember when things are going badly, or when they're going well. Nothing lasts. Things change.

If things are going badly, it is certain that things will get better.

When things are going well, hang on, because things will get worse.

That's the way life is. Up and down, up and down.

I hope there is something you can think of to do that will either help things get better, or help you hang in there until they do. Because things WILL get better.

HereSince1628

(36,063 posts)
5. Just the opposite.
Sun Jul 15, 2012, 09:36 PM
Jul 2012

I've got 7 acres of woodlot. It's worthless, but, it's mine and it's peaceful. When the rest of life is just shit, I can sit and listen to the resident flock of turkeys softly calling to keep the young ones from getting lost. It's a blessing to have a place that centers life.

nolabear

(41,915 posts)
6. Yeah, we therapists call it "The geographic cure". It doesn't work.
Sun Jul 15, 2012, 10:12 PM
Jul 2012

Not that there's anything wrong with starting over. But whatever got you where you are in this life will probably get you somewhere similar in another. But you're telling yourself something important. Maybe you're ignoring something that is calling to you.

Hope you find a way to be happier.

turtlerescue1

(1,013 posts)
7. "Never leave the problem until you're forced from it The Blessing."
Sun Jul 15, 2012, 10:14 PM
Jul 2012

my mentor's advice likely decades before you were born.

I always called it finding the nearest band of wandering gypsies and dancing by a campfire.

Can you take a night away, and just go sleep in your car? Got a dog/cat/friend?
Breathe different air for a while. Practice escapism of location.

What I want on my tombstone has a lot to do with your words Myrina: "Well it sounded like a good idea at the time."
Spent 20 years going back and forth from California to Minnesota. So guess what- I NOW live in Arkansas. Nope, I didn't just jump and move, but in retrospect, yeah, kinda. Me and that roving band of gypsy hearts.

If it stress, this works but you have to really try: Belly breathing with Yoga Count.
In hale slowly 1-2-3-, now with the ribs 4-5-6-, and shoulders 7-8-9. Exhale slowly: 1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9.

Hope all the hell is resolved. Look for the humor, no matter what, be it cynicism; sarcarcism or rediculous.

Besides we'll need your vote this Fall.



Joe Shlabotnik

(5,604 posts)
9. I feel that way everyday.
Mon Jul 16, 2012, 01:07 AM
Jul 2012

Not so much in a geographical way, but rather rather just longing for change or an escape route. The feeling, (or fact) that you have little or no options is terrible and crushing.

Wounded Bear

(58,440 posts)
11. Me, too....
Mon Jul 16, 2012, 08:20 AM
Jul 2012

I'm not suicidal, but I'm starting to understand why and when people feel that way.

That would be the ultimate "geographical" cure, but is a permanent solution to a temporary (I hope) problem.

I guess we just have to hang in there.

SammyWinstonJack

(44,129 posts)
20. And absolutely NOTHING to look forward too. Only things ending up worse. That's how it works out.
Mon Jul 16, 2012, 10:48 PM
Jul 2012

I tell myself that one day I will look back and realize that here and now wasn't as bad as I thought because now it's much worse.

That doesn't help.

 

Arugula Latte

(50,566 posts)
14. Sometimes I get on I-5 to go a relatively short distance
Mon Jul 16, 2012, 01:41 PM
Jul 2012

but I always think ... Hmmm .... I could just keep driving and driving, down to Mexico ...

Myrina

(12,296 posts)
16. ... so when you run outta gas, that's your new home ...
Mon Jul 16, 2012, 03:51 PM
Jul 2012

... find someplace to crash, work odd jobs for some cash and either settle in if you like the vibe, or fill that gas tank back up and keep moving.

Easy to say, I really wish I could live that way, but I'm just not that brave.
Did it once about 17 years ago and it worked out well, but ... not had the gumption since. And I wish I did.

 

loli phabay

(5,580 posts)
18. dosnt matter where you go, you will still be there
Mon Jul 16, 2012, 08:48 PM
Jul 2012

you gotta change you rather than the place you are. Or you will still be running forever.

SammyWinstonJack

(44,129 posts)
19. Nearly every day.
Mon Jul 16, 2012, 10:40 PM
Jul 2012
I don't know who the hell's life I landed in, but it sucks and sure as hell isn't the one I ordered when I was a teenager.



I can so relate!

Kennah

(14,116 posts)
22. If it were just me, or just me and the wife ...
Tue Jul 17, 2012, 12:01 AM
Jul 2012

... yeah I probably would have, a few times already. In some ways, maybe I already did. Between 1997 and 2012, wife and I moved 8 times through 5 states. All were planned, and tied to a job change. Except for one, which was a "get me the hell outta here and I'll go anywhere" thing. Took a job people had warned me, "Don't ever work there." They were right.

At times in the past, I would reflect on things and say to my wife, "We should not have done X. We should have instead done Y." She argued against this saying we are where we are, and we might not be there had we not done what we did. Once we had kids, she could throw that at me. "If we hadn't moved from this place to that other place, we might have had our kids." I eventually conceded this. She was right.

It's true with everything in one's life. It's a tapestry. Everything you do, everything that happens, all melds together.

When the wife and I were first together as boyfriend and girlfriend, shacked up for about 8 years, she tells me how I used to be extremely angry over lots of things. Leads me to sometimes ask, "So why did you stay with me?" Overall she's not entirely sure, but she does say she loved me and still loves me.

Whenever she's asked me, "Why were you so angry?", I remind her about the molestation. Molested by a Boy Scout leader as a kid will fuck up your head. Time heals, but it definitely changes you and you're never the same. Puts you down a different path.

Last time we moved, it was pretty close to desperation. Out of work for 7 months, bankruptcy, foreclosure, and took a job with the state making almost 40% less and with healthcare benefits that puts us in the underinsured category. Next year, we'll switch to a different, more expensive, plan. Economy plans aren't economical. Still buying our meds from Canada. Gaia Bless Canada, and Gaia Bless Canadian Healthcare. They're pretty close to keeping us alive.

One very positive thing about the move, was the Olympia School District has been awesome. Old district was good, but Olympia is great! Our 11 year old is somewhere on the spectrum, they figured that out pretty fast, since we moved here in early April so they only had 2 months to figure him out. Got him placed in a great program for Middle School next year. I sleep easier at night knowing that.

Biking to work, no need for a second car, which got totaled in 2009. Still I worry at times over will we have enough to make it through the month with enough food. WIC wasn't a huge amount of benefit, but that $20-$25 worth of food was very welcomed. Been hunting for a second job. Not a lot out there.

We survive day by day. Paycheck by paycheck. If the rent goes up next year, do we move? If that fuckhead Rob McKenna becomes Washington's Governor, state employees and most residents are likely fucked.

I share this only in the hope that it is some small solace to know:

It is not your fault, and there is nothing wrong with you.

The world is fucked up today, and it is the fault of a small group of rich, arrogant, privileged, bastards.

Things will turn.

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