55 in age , my email this morning.

As you get closer to your dirt nap, emails progress to actual pre-death coffin selection, burial plots, and cremation ashes mixed in with Quik-Crete to make mini-artificial reefs. You’re goin’ to love it.

I plan on being cremated no reverse mortgage I’m in line for my teamster pension and as for viagra the verdict is still out yet looking like I may be a customer soon😂

DoestheemailspammersknowsomethingIdon't?

set up a 'legacy' gift.

I get constant offers and incentives to join the AARP.

I may be 69, but the "R" part doesn't apply. They apparently think I have dementia, because they refuse to believe me when I tell them that I am not retired, nor do I have any plans to retire any time in the foreseeable future. They keep sending me their "offers."

Maybe max 8 years take my pension then ssi. Was talking to a friend who still lives in Germany, we were stationed together he went awol got married in 86 I told him in hindsight he made a great decision to bolt back then. Well one she was with child and today the politics in America.

I already have pretty much the freedom to do whatever I want to do now within my job. If I were "retired," I would probably just end up doing what I do now free-lance, not get paid anywhere near what I'm paid now, and without the support of our organization. Why would I opt for that? For some card that offers me a 10% discount on things I don't want, redeemable only in a country where I don't live?

I am 73, not that much older than you, and happily retired. Personally, I have never had a job that was better than not working.

But I do understand your frustration about AARP not understanding that you are not, and in the foreseeable future, will still not, be retired. Good for you to hang on.

Obviously, my rank and responsibilities have grown exponentially, but essentially, I'm kinda doing the same basic thing I was back then when I was recruited in 1975. After 46 years at it, you can probably imagine I can't imagine doing any other job. I just happen to LIKE what I do. Since my job requires lots of travel, but also lets me determine when, where, and how long I want to take my vacations, I can only conjure up two scenarios: work or die of boredom. I can do the latter any time, but I'm in no rush.

... self quarantine has just plain taken it out of me, the house if filled with plants and so is the deck, I was turning into the fern talker, and they were getting sick of my voice and my over caring.

It gives Joy four hours of peace and quiet four or five days a week.

Resist.

from the Scooter Store when I turned 50. My daughter recently got her first offer.

The insurance companies bombard you every single day with ads to sign up with them.

In addition to the usual hearing aids, step-in bathtubs, burial plots, assisted living homes, life insurance, walkers, canes, scooters, and support stockings …. It’s unreal.

By a cremation service.

Get calls daily from every Medicare insurance co., get calls daily for burial insurance or burial plots. Hubs just messes with them & tells them he's 23 & why are they calling? I only answer calls now when I'm expecting someone or when I know the name - got tired of dealing with the unrelenting crap.

Hello, county sheriffs fraud division, you're on tape, how can I help you?

... "Generic Viagra may produce erections varying in size, shape and constancy from those produced by name brand Viagra, however the erections produced are still viable and useful, if a little scary."

If I take it I’ll be shooting armor piercing rounds once again from my m-60 machine gun thanks

... a BB might just roll out the barrel of a licorice whip, too.

Of late I exercise my whole life yet I’m thinking wtf on putting rounds out down range 😉

"varied shape".

... you might need a hand glass to see it.

microscope?

Because that's what I use.

A microscope.

... I think my damn hand glass is wearing out!

"Local women want to have sex with you right now" ones.

I just think "no they don't", and delete the email.

They probably just want the lunch menu at Burger King those bitches

We’re not gonna disco ladies I have bad knees 😉

My uncle, who has now passed on, was quite handsome and charming. Ex-marine, happily married, but very flirty with the women. He wasn't overtly sexual about it, but he just loved chatting up the older women.

After he retired, he would fill his days by going to the same Burger King and sitting in there for HOURS, asking groups of women if he could join them while they ate or drank their coffee, etc. He had a way about him, so they usually accepted. But after awhile, some people took offense, especially the local Burger King management because he would spend very little money while taking up space in there for hours on end. So they banned him from that Burger King.

So he tried doing it at another Burger King.

Long story short, he was permanently banned from every local Burger King. One of the store managers actually took his picture and sent it around to the other managers saying something like "Ban this guy if he comes into your store".

where you are invited to a "gourmet" lunch in exchange for having to listen to a sales pitch for annuities or some such thing? Ads for old folks' homes featuring photos of smiling gray-haired people playing golf or dancing? Hearing aids?

It will get worse, just wait...

It’s all about selling shit. 🙄

Jimmy Carter hit the nail on the head during his 15 July 1979 speech.