My most shocking moment from when I was a heavy alcoholic.

[Ron Obvious]

In the not so distant past I was a very heavy drinker. I have a vague recollection of getting up in the middle of the night one time to go to the toilet and I must have slipped and hit my head on the sink pretty hard, drawing blood. It barely registered and I went back to bed.

Sometime near noon the next day, I woke up with a cracked forehead in a puddle of blood to find that my wife had left me and had written a goodbye message on my chest with a Sharpie marker. In the bathroom sink there was a pool of blood that partially explained my situation.

I remember feeling very sorry for my self. I remember looking at the message written on my chest in horror.

I was shocked.

I was horrified.

I was appalled.

I mean, how could she misspell the word 'asshole' like that?

[In_The_Wind]

1. Indeed

I'm glad your heavy drinking days are over.

[Liberal_in_LA]

2. lol. last statement made me laugh

[bluesbassman]

3. Well if it's any consolation...

I'm sure she was in a hurry.

[Ron Obvious]

4. That's what she said!

That's what she said!

It's not enough of an excuse, though.

[Tobin S.]

5. I hope you and your wife were able to work it out.

I mean a simple misspelling is no reason to hold a grudge.

[Ron Obvious]

14. I'm a fair man.

Oh, I don't hold grudge. I'm a fair man. Cruel and mean, but fair.

[KurtNYC]

6. To everyone else the alcoholic's problem is their relationship with alcohol, but to the alcoholic

the problem is everyone else telling them not to drink.

[raccoon]

7. Amen! nt

[AnneD]

8. I'll have to share this one.....

with my brother. Eleven years sober and couldn't be any more proud of him. And of you too Ron. Are you sure of the misspelling? The chest hair may have distorted it.

[Ron Obvious]

11. Oh, quite sure.

Only one 's'.

Give my regards to your brother! I bet he's a lot happier now, like I am.

[Sheldon Cooper]

9. I'm not sure if you're joking about this incident or not, but I think this is how

the actor William Holden died. Anyway, if you're serious, I'm glad you were able to stop.

[Ron Obvious]

12. No, it really happened like that

I'm partially joking about being appalled about the misspelling, but the whole incident happened exactly as described, including the spelling error.

I'm glad I was able to stop too, even if it took a hospitalisation to make me see the errors of my ways. Oddly, I have no trouble being around alcohol now, and keeping it in the house and pouring drinks for other people. I wouldn't have believed that a few years ago!

[dixiegrrrrl]

10. Lucky for you she used just a Sharpie...

if ya know what I mean.

[Ron Obvious]

13. Ouch!

I can't say she didn't have cause.. At some point I went from being a funny drinker to a mean drunk. She's repeated to me some of the things I said and did during those days that I have no recollection of at all, and it makes me shudder. It really is like someone else took over the controls during those times. It's eerie.

[Manifestor_of_Light]

15. This happened to me:

Woke up one morning and realized I was "Mrs. Asshole".

Alcohol had nothing to do with it, in my case. He was a sober asshole.



Oh, and he'd had his hemorrhoids fixed several years before, so that made him a perfect asshole.