Really Bad Music Question for the Community

[LynneSin]

Suppose Aliens were invading the earth and we knew that really bad music could repell them from our planet. Which song would you play extremely loudly, at volume 11 with the song on repeat in order to ensure that the Aliens would abandon their plans to overtake our planet. Sure the humans on the earth would suffer for a bit but we would salvage our planet for future generations.

If I couldn't find a video of Sarah Palin playing the flute at her Miss Alaska Pageant then I'd probably put Nickelback on permament repeat until the Aliens abandoned all hope.

[Brother Buzz]

1. I'd hire Stacy Hedger to blast her bugle

[Coventina]

2. "We Built This City"

by Starship

[LynneSin]

4. Jefferson Starship did a concert here in Delaware

Some friends went but I refused to go for fear that they might actually play that song at the concert.

That song totally sucks

[Coventina]

6. Agreed. I think what makes it especially bad

is that it's embarrassing.

I mean, bad songs are ten-a-penny, but when a once great act reduces itself to that.....

Well, "epic fail" comes to mind.....

[uriel1972]

24. I have hated that song since I first heard it...

To the point I have refused to listen to any of their previous music, for fear it would be as equally bad.

[dawg]

50. The song isn't *that* bad.

It's just bland, generic, and kind of yucky.

The only thing that makes it truly horrible is the number of times it got played on the radio. Familiarity bred contempt.

[Xyzse]

3. William Hung - My Heart Will Go On.

[Boom Sound 416]

5. Anything by the Spin Doctors oughta do it

[dawg]

49. I like the Spin Doctors. :(

[Boom Sound 416]

57. And I'm a Gator!

[dawg]

58. Then you have Sister Hazel ...

to apologize for.

[Boom Sound 416]

60. Guilty as charged, sir

[LeftOfSelf-Centered]

7. Creed would be one of the obvious answers...

But really all you'd have to do is have the aliens tune in to any radio station the plays the endless lists of corporate pop shovelware (the boy/girl bands, the biebers, the gagas and their ilk) and they'd realize pretty quickly that we aren't worth invading.

[dawg]

51. I like ... no ... I don't like Creed, but ...

I do like "With Arms Wide Open". Yes I do.

[GoCubsGo]

8. Any Pop music should do.

The vast majority of it has been excruciatingly bad for decades.

[Adsos Letter]

9. 1910 Fruitgum Company...

"Yummy, Yummy, Yummy"

http://m.

[mokawanis]

30. Wish I could somehow forget that song

I was a little kid when that song was popular, and I hated it even then.

[LeftOfSelf-Centered]

59. So, I take it...

you don't have love in your tummy?

[NRaleighLiberal]

10. Anything autotuned, or anything with multisyllable screeches

Always wondered who was responsible for that latter one...Whitney or Mariah?

Or perhaps any of the many awful one hit wonders from the 70s - Alone Again Naturally, Saturday Night (Bay City Rollers), Billy don't Be A hero, The Night Chicago Died.

Maybe a nice endless loop of them!

[KamaAina]

11. Dear FSM. Nickelback are virtuosos compared to...

[Gidney N Cloyd]

15. Whoa, there. We just want to repell them, not kill them.

[KamaAina]

17. Okay, then.

[uriel1972]

25. My parents had that album... nt

[progressoid]

34. 1974 had some nasty hits.

[dawg]

52. Now we're talking.

I have a visceral reaction to that one.

[Archae]

12. Bruce Springsteen or Steve Miller Band.

And to the Springsteen fans, bite me.
He only has two methods of "singing."
Mumbling off-key or sounding like a water buffalo that's been kicked in the nads.

Steve Miller Band, anything a band could do wrong, they did.

[LynneSin]

16. OMG - I'd play those as WELCOMING music to Aliens

Unless you want to be repelled from the earth

[KamaAina]

18. You know who else mumbles off-key? Dylan.

You gonna start hatin' on Dylan?!

[uriel1972]

26. Dylan was a n okay songwriter, but his singing sucked...

Don't get me started on the harmonica playing either...

[MrScorpio]

43. Say what you will about Steve Miller, I will always love this version of Fly Like An Eagle

[eShirl]

13. Spice Girls

[Doc_Technical]

14. "Don't Worry Kyoko (Mummy's only looking for a hand in the snow"

by the Plastic Ono Band

[kwassa]

19. Oh, anything by Kiss or Alice Cooper, and I would say Pink Floyd, but ..

Floyd would only put aliens to sleep, and not get them to actually leave, which is the point of the whole things.

[calimary]

20. I'm sorry to say this, and I beg everyone's forgiveness, but

I'd have to say, anything by Willie Nelson.

"Always on My Mind" - that twang - OWWWW!

I deeply appreciate his stature in the industry and as a compassionate leading light. But OMG. That twang makes me want to run screaming into the night! I suspect it would liquify the outer shell of any alien ship that came close enough!

[dawg]

53. I like Willie. :(

[calimary]

64. I like him too - as an activist. I greatly appreciate his heart.

And he started Farm Aid. And he gives a damn. I appreciate him and respect him greatly for his morals and his principles and his commitment to the little guy. And I think he's simply wonderful as a human being.

It's just that voice… GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAK!!! Agonizing!!!!

I'm not too keen on country music, I'm afraid. It is absolutely NOT my cup of tea. If al Qaeda ever wanted to torture me, they'd pretty much liquify me and get anything they wanted out of me if they forced me to listen to that. I dated a guy in college who was MAD for Hank Williams and "Little Audrey" and so forth. One night he put an album on called "Area Code 615." It was a compilation of songs played by some of the best session musicians in Nashville. Really prominent, highly-respected landmark artists who, I guess, have played with EVERYBODY by now. Musicians who were almost literally the platinum standard, about whom one would speak in hushed tones. I'm certain they're wonderful. I'm sure they're really nice people, too. Most country music folks are, and I met and interviewed quite a few of them while I was still working. And everybody I met WAS really nice and charming and friendly and genuine and well-mannered and truly very dear, and tremendously enjoyable to be around.

BUT Jesus, Mary, and Joseph - that stuff made me want to run screaming into the night! I just couldn't take it. One or two bars of that sickly, soupy pedal steel guitar and I was bleeding out my ears and my insides started calling me horrible names. Felt like all my skin was being sanded off my body and set on fire and that somebody had poured napalm into my brain. I couldn't get away from it fast enough. All I could do was grope around frantically for my purse and car keys so I could get the hell outta there!!!

Give me rock or Rat Pack, classical or smooth jazz, bluegrass or blues - or give me death. Forgive me. I'm really sorry I feel that way, because it's a legitimate American art form. But PLEEEEEEEZE no country music! PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEZE!!!!!! Do not do that to me! Don't even threaten! Not EVER!!!!

[csziggy]

21. Slim Whitman- When I'm calling you

That question was answered in "Mars Attacks" -

For the whole song:

[steve2470]

22. play Kung Fu Fighting on endless loop at volume 11

[Terra Alta]

23. Escape (The Pina Colada Song)

Terrible song and the lyrics are really cheesy.

&feature=kp

[OmahaBlueDog]

27. "I've Never Been to Me" by Charlene

..then finish them off with "Disco Duck" by Rick Dees.

[uriel1972]

36. Ooooh yeah the first bites...

But I liked Disco Duck when I was young.

[Systematic Chaos]

47. Beat me to it on the Charlene, but -- sorry man -- I like Disco Duck!

"I've Never Been to Me" is the absolute WORST popular song from like, the entire 7-year period from 1978 to 1984, inclusive. The only other one to even come close was that "God Bless America Again" bullshit from Charlie Daniels, but at least that had energy you could kinda groove to if you ignored the lyrics.

[MindMover]

28. When Worlds Collide ...

[applegrove]

29. Cheryl Ladd "Think It Over"

[mokawanis]

31. Terry Jacks - Seasons in the Sun

[oftheforest]

32. These Boots Were Made for Walkin.....

Why is that song never mentioned in "bad song" threads? Or is it just me?

[sendero]

45. Because...

... it's not bad.

[Kali]

33. ...

[jmowreader]

35. Play 'em the theme song to Sarah Palin's new pay-per-view webcast

[Manifestor_of_Light]

37. Whatever-the-hell flavor of metal.

Or shitkick with pedal steel guitar abuse and clothespins on noses on whiny singers. "Aww, I ran outta beer, my pickup got repossessed, my wife ran off with my best friend, my dawg got killed when the porch fell offa da house..."

[aint_no_life_nowhere]

38. Mrs. Miller singing Strangers In The Night

but if they have a sense of humor and realize that Mrs. Miller was a comic act in the 60s, the aliens might enjoy it. As far as bad music by musicians who take themselves seriously, maybe Air Supply?

[GReedDiamond]

39. To get a little more into bad CONTEMPORARY pop music...

...because, after scanning the responses to the OP, a lot of them are from decades-old "artists."

To bring it up to date, I would say anything by Justin Bieber, and anything else by anybody else which utilizes autotuning in an abusive and aurally annoying/aggravating way, which is a whole lotta shit on the airwaves right now.

Which means, if the Evil Aliens are monitoring our "communications," they have already heard Bieber and the rest, and have fled to a safer star system than ours.

[mvd]

40. I think Michael Bolton would scare them away with his wail

Lol

[Skittles]

41. anything by Natalie Merchant

that thin, tinny voice makes my skin crawl

[dawg]

48. I like Natalie. :(

[Skittles]

63. to each their own

I literally have to leave a store if they play her, she irritates me so much

[countryjake]

42. Speedy Gonzales

Amazing to me, hearing this again, I still despise it as much as I ever did.

[hobbit709]

44. Our bad music might be their good music. You'd have to find out what they hate.

[LeftinOH]

46. Just turn on the radio; any station playing current 'hits'. n/t

[pipi_k]

55. Couldn't

agree with you more!

Today's "music" absolutely blows chunks.


For a while I was thinking it's just me being an old fart, but no.


I've seen younger people than myself...mid 20s even...saying the same thing.


So yeah..turn the radio to any current Pop station and blast it. That shit will kill those Martian bastards faster than our atmosphere and earth-bound germs did in "War of the Worlds".

[dawg]

54. "Young Girl"

Gary Puckett and the Union Gap.

[Trajan]

56. Unleashing the Dogs of Hate

Invariably, these kinds of threads become "I hate this band" ... "I hate that artist", even though notions of art are always subjective ...

Very sincere attempt to ask this question, but the hate has already set in ...

Too bad ...

[Throd]

61. Yoko Ono

[Broken_Hero]

62. A filipinio cover band playing Um Bop by Hansen nt