I'm fucked. My wife let our daugther get a fucking dog.

[madinmaryland]

I'm fucked. Moving out soon (me)

[Lochloosa]

1. Mad?

[applegrove]

2. Bet you puppy will take a liking to you and follow you around.

[madinmaryland]

3. Our daughter who has brought home cats in the past is

now bringing home a dog. She has never done anything with cats. Feeding or cleaning up litter boxes. She now says she will take care of the dog. (BTW, she is 18)

Yeah. We'll see what happens, but it is a recipe for for disaster, then I'll have to move out and still support them.

[applegrove]

5. That's a recipe for disaster. Vibes.

[valerief]

4. I hope it's a little dog. They have little shits. nt

[madinmaryland]

6. No. It will be about 40 pounds.

[valerief]

7. Medium shits. Sorry to hear this. Well, if you have a god complex,

you're in luck, because dogs see us as their gods. (Just trying to make a positive spin. )

[madinmaryland]

8. We rent a house and our daughter is clueless when it comes to taking care of a pet...

It's just really pissing me off, when she says this will improve her responsibility like have a baby (yeah, she said that). She can't even feed the cats, if we go out to steak&shake.

Thanks for your thoughts.

[elleng]

9. So sorry, mad.

As you surely know, at 18 she's plenty old to be GIVEN the responsibility, and seriously constrained/forced to exercise it. One/two failures on daughter's part >>> that's it, dog's out.

Again, SORRY.

[avebury]

10. I understand that you are ticked off about it.

I would also be really concerned about what will happen to the dog in the long run. The dog didn't ask to be "adopted" by someone who is not responsible enough to take care of it. Too many animals end up in shelters and ultimately euthanized because of irresponsible owners.

[Duppers]

14. Thank you!

You said it better than I just posted down thread.

[Downwinder]

11. Look at it this way.

She could have brought home a boyfriend.

[madinmaryland]

12. ...

The boyfriend we met is the one we want to see again...

The first tropical storm is named after him!!!!

[Duppers]

13. Since i respect and love dogs..

I'll be blunt-- I feel sorry for any animal in your dysfunctional household. Sounds as if it's way past time for some family counseling. Seriously.

Poor dog.




Be kind. Don't take your anger out on the dog -- it's not his fault. Pups can be taxing and exhausting even if you love them to death.

Find out why your daughter is so irresponsible and your wife hasn't taken your feelings into consideration. Seems as if there's a lot of stress and you're feeling frustrated and powerless.

Sending my best wishes and condolences.

[narnian60]

25. Bluntly well said.

[madinmaryland]

27. Thank you and I appreciate your comments...

I and then my wife have have had cats for nearly 30 years. My wife and I have been together for over 20 years.

I have no anger or hatred against animals. I know the type of animal that I want to be responsible and those that I don't.

[In_The_Wind]

15. Awww

[JustABozoOnThisBus]

16. This thread is useless without photos

especially photos of the dog laying in your luggage so you can't move out.

I think you will get as much sympathy here as the guy with the christmas doormat and the door buzzard.

Have fun with your new pet!

[The Second Stone]

17. Even in California all of your OP is illegal

But at least she didn't bring home her fucking boyfriend.

[LiberalEsto]

18. About 8 years ago our daughter's then-boyfriend gave her a dog for her birthday

She was living with the boyfriend at the time.
I was furious because we already had 2 cats and I knew she was competely irresponsible. I didn't want the expense and responsibility of a dog, and I knew it would eventually be dumped on me.

However, as I got to know the dog during her visits, I fell in love with Bailey. In fact my husband and I liked him so much that in a couple of years we decided to get a dog of our own.

Both Bailey and our dog Penny are half King Charles Cavalier spaniel, a sweet and lovable breed. Bailey's also half chihuahua, which makes him a bit yappy. Penny is half American Eskimo, which makes her larger and fluffier. I can't imagine life without either of them.

Our daughter and her dog ended up moving home. She has grown much more responsible over the years. Now she takes them on long walks whenever weather permits. I can't walk them because of knee problems. I never thought I'd end up a happy dog owner. You never know.

Maybe some good will come of this, madinMaryland.

[GreatGazoo]

19. does that kind of make it your wife's dog?

I love mine. Hope you can give it a chance. They are relentlessly loving. Good for your health too:

http://abcnews.go.com/Health/dogs-cut-common-cold-risk-ways-dogs-health/story?id=16604565


perhaps some propaganda will help...

[magical thyme]

20. I'm sorry, mostly for the poor dog who doesn't have a voice or choice in this

You certainly should have some say in the matter. Is your wife aware that you plan to move out if they go ahead with bringing in the dog? It sounds like you have some serious problems in your family.

[a la izquierda]

21. Yikes..

as someone who is lovingly spending every night on the couch, caring for an epileptic senior dog, I hope like hell your daughter grows up. Dogs are a tremendous responsibility and expense. I have three. I wouldn't trade them for all the gold in the world. But I've slept an average of 4 hours a night for two weeks, getting up to comfort my dog or take him potty in 15 degree weather.

Good luck to the dog.

[Lilyhoney]

22. Animal shelters want permission from landlords.

The two animals I brought home from the shelter needed to be approved by my landlord. The shelters needed verbal or written permission.

This might be a way out of getting the animal. I assume the animal is coming from a shelter.

Or you could just say no.

If the animal is not coming from a shelter the expense will be greater. You could make an itemized list of the first three years of expenses the animal incur that she will be responsible for.

You could show her what happens to animals that were only wanted for a short period of time.

There are a lot of things you can do to prevent this from happening. Or you can just complain about it here and be a victim. The choice is yours. Don't let this happen to you if you don't want it.

Sorry.

[madinmaryland]

23. To answer your comments, I have tried all of those things.

Including using the landlord to slow down or stop the process. He owns a dog himself, so he was not a lot of help, as my wife and daughter went behind my back and spoke to him and got his approval.

We did show her what the expenses would be (others have tried, also). She is blowing her entire check on getting all sorts of stuff that she will need for the damn dog. Then she'll whine she has no money for gas and food or auto insurance.

Also, the answer from me has always been no. Apparently having a dog is more important than family members who have no desire nor want any responsibility for taking care and maintaining the dog.

[roody]

26. I hope it is not a puppy since your daughter is not responsible.

I feel sorry for the dog also. It deserves to be loved and taken care of responsibly.

[Arugula Latte]

24. And what about the poor kitties?

I hate it when people who have cats bring home a dog and then the cats get the shaft because they're scared of the dog or whatever. Ugh.

I'm not much of a dog person either, but the dog deserves a good home where it is wanted and cared for properly. But so do the kitties. They were there first.

[KT2000]

35. Good point

My ex-neighbors had 2 cats and then got 2 dogs - a totally wired German Shepard and the other part pit bull. The cats ended up at my house living outside in the winter. I gave them shelter boxes and eventually food. The neighbors moved away and the cats are still with me. I love them but they are expensive - special diet and health worries for one.

People really need to think through their decisions about pets because the commitment is for their whole lives - in sickness and health.

[ProfessorGAC]

37. Well, That Worked Out For Us

Four cats. Got a dog. The cats hang with the dog. Then we got a second one when the first one died.

Now one of the cats won't be in the room if the dog isn't there and all of them wander around now and then looking for where he is.

We have a highly harmonious interspecies household.

[WinkyDink]

28. Oh, we know where THIS is going, do we not? Man hates idea of dog; man meets dog; man lurves doggie!

[oldandhappy]

29. The dog is innocent.

You and your wife sound useless.

[madinmaryland]

30. No shit, Sherlock...

You comment is fucking useless. Did you actually read the thread?

[oldandhappy]

38. yes

[KamaAina]

32. Nice post, Michael Vick!

[UTUSN]

33. If my choice is between you & dog...

[orleans]

34. i hope everything works out for all of you.

i've had a dog in my life since i was fifteen.

(we had cats before that and then discovered that i was highly allergic to cats--& the symptoms even included asthma attacks--it was devastating to have to part with my kitties but there were too many nights i couldn't breathe & trips to the emergency room for shots of adrenaline.)

my mom brought our first dog home--didn't consult me or my dad. and neither one of us were thrilled at first. but i ended up falling in love with her, as did my dad. he'd come home from work and she was always at the door, wagging her tail, the first one to greet him--and he'd smile and laugh at his new best friend who was always so delighted to see him. she became one of his joys in life. and in my life as well.

if you are an animal lover (and i suspect you have a heart for them since you do & have had cats) then i think if you just open your heart and mind a little to this new addition you might not be so angry. i'm guessing the dog is feeling a bit scared, lonely, and anxious simply by being in new and different surroundings, and around new people.

if it's a rescued dog then he might also have a sad backstory--maybe he is scared of people, or loud noises, maybe he was treated badly, or abused, or yelled at, or neglected. (i have a rescued dog now and she was very afraid of people, noises, and trucks when she came to live with me. i slept in the living room with her and she slept as far away from me as she could get for the first several nights. i know she was scared. she was picked up as a stray from out of state and i know there is a lot of history to her that neither she, nor anyone else, can tell me about.

i hope you can put aside some of the anger and resentment you feel and think about this dog that has been put in this new situation and environment and the distress it must feel--having to learn all the cues for different things from the three of you.

take a breath. see how it goes. you may find that you have a special friend you never dreamed you'd have.

they say people and animals come into our lives for a reason--and that we are meant to know who we know for whatever reason (to learn from, to grow, to understand, to love, etc.)

like i said, i hope everything works out for all of you--and i wish all of you the best.

[Contrary1]

36. The problem will be gone before you knew what hit you...

You will wonder where that little girl went...and you will miss her. I am speaking from experience here.

Patience, Dad. It is not the end of the world. Really.

[darkangel218]

39. You're moving out because your daughter adopted a dog??

Wth...

[Sanity Claws]

44. It sounds more like it is the last straw

Too often people focus on the last in a series of things and say that is the cause. Often it is the last in a series of things and the series of things show a pattern. It might be a pattern of disrespect, disregard, or something else. Everyone has a breaking point.

[HeiressofBickworth]

40. I feel your frustration

My daughter, her husband and my granddaughter live with me. We have three cats who are pretty indifferent to each other. About two years ago, granddaughter asked me what I thought of her getting a dog. She was 18 at the time. I told her that I thought it was a bad idea, that she would be moving out at some time and probably wouldn't be able to take the dog; that with both her parents working, that leaves me at home all day to take care of a dog and, frankly, I don't want to take care of a dog.

A week later she showed me the dog she bought. It is a chiweenie which means he is a barker. A year later, just as I predicted, she moved to an apartment with two friends and of course the dog is here. My son-in-law often works at home half-days and the dog stays around him when he is here, but the rest of the time, you guessed it -- I'm taking care of the dog. When he was a puppy, he needed to go outside every 2 hours. He is now up to 4 hours. He hates to be alone so when they all leave for work at o'dark thirty, he comes in and wakes me up so he has someone to be with; he brings a toy. When they go on vacation, I'm here with him ALL the time. He likes to get up about 4:00 to potty. He barks at everything that comes down the street -- cars, people, cats and whatever his imagination provides for him to bark at. I would put up drapes or blinds across the window, but he would probably have them shredded in no time.

On the plus side, he is affectionate and now that he's no longer a puppy, he never potties in the house. I don't hate him; I tolerate him. The cats ignore him. His preferred attachments are (in order) my son-in-law, my granddaughter, my daughter, and if there is absolutely no other human in the house, me. It seems to be working, but just between DU and me, I'd really rather not have a dog.

[justiceischeap]

41. A little late to the party but I just wanted to say, I feel ya

I love, love, love dogs! I would love to have a dog but alas, I know I'm not responsible enough to care for a dog. My two cats and myself push me to my responsibility limits.

Good luck and, remember, the dog isn't to blame. At least it will be a medium-sized dog, which often tend to be much mellower than small dogs (depending on the breed of course).

[KamaAina]

42. A fucking dog?

You didn't get it spayed or neutered?

[LynneSin]

43. Probably a good trade if it's between you and the dog

Just saying

[madinmaryland]

46. It's a Carolina Dog. They beat Dallas by a few points, so I may be a bit pissed by that...

but at least we didn't get humiliated like the eaglets did!!



Hopefully Chip Kelly can do the same the thing for Frisco that he did for Philly!

[mopinko]

45. srsly, my ex did just that. i got a parrot.

i had a parrot that flew away, and when i got another, he decided i had replaced him in my heart w a parrot.

but srsly, to you, dont piss on people's joy. let them have their joy. whatever small shit it costs.
life is short.