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Mon Mar 20, 2017, 09:47 PM

Aides Wrestle Drill From Trumps Hands As He Tries To Remove Obama Listening Device From Skull

http://www.theonion.com/article/aides-wrestle-drill-trumps-hands-he-tries-remove-o-55576



WASHINGTON—Rushing toward the president as he pressed the eight-inch bit into his temple, several White House aides managed to wrestle a drill from Donald Trump’s hand Monday while he attempted to remove Obama’s listening device from his skull. “Obama implanted a microphone inside my head to record everything I say!” Trump reportedly shouted shortly before three White House staffers pinned him to the floor and pried apart his fingers to seize the power tool. “You don’t understand, he can hear everything we’re saying! Obama can even hear my thoughts! I have to get it out! I can feel it! I can feel it! I can feel it!” At press time, staffers were panicking after Trump locked himself in the bathroom and began cutting his stomach open with a razor blade in an attempt to find the tracking chip he said The New York Times had put in his food.



The Onion, Satire...or is it?

5 replies, 1175 views

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Arrow 5 replies Author Time Post
Reply Aides Wrestle Drill From Trumps Hands As He Tries To Remove Obama Listening Device From Skull (Original post)
IronLionZion Mar 20 OP
Moostache Mar 20 #1
Marie Marie Mar 20 #2
dae Mar 20 #3
Rhiannon12866 Mar 21 #4
Wounded Bear Mar 21 #5

Response to IronLionZion (Original post)

Mon Mar 20, 2017, 09:57 PM

1. Let the Donald be the Donald I say...give it back with a fresh charged battery. (n/t)

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Response to Moostache (Reply #1)

Mon Mar 20, 2017, 10:13 PM

2. ...

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Response to IronLionZion (Original post)

Mon Mar 20, 2017, 10:59 PM

3. Lol!

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Response to IronLionZion (Original post)

Tue Mar 21, 2017, 06:40 AM

4. Is The Onion now a psychological journal??

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Response to IronLionZion (Original post)

Tue Mar 21, 2017, 09:49 AM

5. If that drill bit is 8 inches long...

then Trump's "hands" are ginormous.

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