In the UK, with 97 days until Brexit, this is what the new far right leader of the House of Commons

[Soph0571]

thinks is important...



DON'T USE THE WORDS, THEY ARE VERY BAD WORDS..



DO NOT BREAK THE GRAMMAR AND MEASUREMENT RULES OF 1850

But Brexit... nothing to see here... only 97 day to go!!!!

If you do not know who this chap is...he is one of the far right loon brigade who in normal times would languishing on the back benchers muttering to the other loons.

[rampartc]

1. "use imperial measurements?"

is he daft? you are leaving the eu, not the civilized world.

[Soph0571]

2. For him the civilised world is c 1850 n/t

[OnDoutside]

10. What empire ?

[Cirque du So-What]

3. He's a shoe-in for this year's competition

[muriel_volestrangler]

4. Now I know why I just saw "Oxford comma" was trending on UK Twitter

"Esq."? Oh boy, it's like the unpopular prep school English master has ideas of moulding the unfortunate sods in his class to be ready to take over the reins of empire ...

[Soph0571]

5. Yeah, I wish someone would tell him that Empire was soooo last century!

[muriel_volestrangler]

17. London Review of Books: Prep School Rules

Apart from the idiocy about esquires and imperial measurements, the rules in and of themselves are fairly innocuous: don’t use ‘hopefully’, ‘due to’, ‘got’, ‘ongoing’ etc. Rees-Mogg could have been given the list by his prep school English teacher. There’s a weird injunction never to use a comma after ‘and’ (Twitter is bristling with counter-examples) and, chances are, that’s a hangover from prep school too.

The whole business is a fairly transparent publicity exercise: ‘Trying to think of a better way to get journalists talking about you,’ Will Davies tweeted, ‘than issuing a bullshit *style guide*.’ Even the LRB has obliged. It’s all part of what James Meek calls Rees-Mogg’s ‘rolling re-enactment of steak-and-kidney-pudding Edwardian Britishness’: narcissistic and self-serving, certainly, but not so much a distraction from his schemes for self-enrichment as intricately bound up with them, ‘facets of a single worldview that shows the actual nature of Faragist Britain’.

https://www.lrb.co.uk/blog/2019/july/prep-school-rules

[unc70]

11. That should be "comma before and"

There are few situations where the comma goes after "and", mostly contrived.

[DetlefK]

6. Boris Johnson has already committed political suicide.

He promised to negotiate a new deal with the EU.

There won't be a new deal. This is as far as the EU is willing to go and the UK has no leeway to push the EU further.

The UK has two options and two options only:
* Brexit under the current deal, which would be bad for Britain's economy
* Brexit without a deal, which would be catastrophic for Britain's economy




I recently saw a short documentary where british economists complained that nobody is conducting studies how Brexit will affect the british economy. It's easier to claim that Brexit will be great if there are no studies which could contradict you!!!

[Soph0571]

7. But..but..Imperial Measurements...*rolls eyes*

[guillaumeb]

8. Dear Mr. Rees Mogg,

I am very pleased to learn of your ongoing campaign to hopefully eliminate a lot of unacceptable phrases. I am certain that you are equal to this ongoing task, and while I hope to never meet with you, hopefully you will be able to contain your disappointment.

While I understand your concerns, and your defining words and terms that are no longer fit for purpose, perhaps if Britain had invested more in schools, idiots like you would never be in charge of anything larger than a 2 person boat.

Sincerely,

Guillaume.

[Celerity]

9. BoJo the pronger is no longer fit for purpose.

[Soph0571]

12. We need a new name for Bojo that is fitting of this picci!

[Celerity]

13. Vincent

(assuming you know yer bow bells rhymes)

[Celerity]

14. I should explain for our non London mates

Vincent van Gogh is Cockney rhyming slang (Cockney ie 'born in the sound of the Bow Bells' ie St Mary-le-Bow church bells in the East End of London)

for

fuck off as in

(van) go fuck yourself

so Boris is Vincent, lolol

another example so you see the pattern

'I fell down the apples'

apples and pears

as in I fell down the stairs

or

'fuck me, Marcos Alonso hit the beans AGAIN' (I am a Chelsea girl to my Blue bones and I want that git off our team!!)

beans and toast

hit the post (football ie soccer (I cringe when I type soccer, lololol)

[T_i_B]

15. So, grammar nazi's are actual nazi's too.

Also, the metric system is brilliant, which is why it has supplanted imperial measurements. Jacob Rees-Mogg is clearly not thinking about employee's under the age of 45, but then his supporters don't ever think about what it must be like to work for such a numpty either.

[Soph0571]

16. I fear for his civil servants

Poor bastards

[LeftishBrit]

18. Use imperial measurements?

(1) How is it up to him? (2) The move from Imperial to metric units was established in 1965, before we joined the EU - and before Jacob, Esq. was even born. Insisting on Imperial units would create problems with most trading partners, not just those of the EU. I don't think his advice is worth a farthing, so maybe he should just go back and measure his land, using rods, poles and perches.

[muriel_volestrangler]

19. This is for all his staff in everything they write

He doesn't want to hear that the tailback on the M20 from lorries delayed at Dover is 50km; it should be 32 miles. He doesn't want to acknowledge a July temperature of 38 degrees Celsius; he'd rather live in the past, where temperatures never got over 100 degrees Fahrenheit.