Assisted living costs

[CountAllVotes]

out there!

A relative of mine recently decided to place their mother into an assisted living complex. She has been very sick/close to death.

The cost is over $4,000+ a month.

My relative said it is a lot cheaper than keeping her in a nursing home. The assisted living place is about 50 miles from where my relative now lives.

I guess assisted living is costly no matter where you live.

I was told to move to Missouri, the last place on the face of the earth I'd ever considered living.

That said, I hope I kick the bucket before it comes to this!

The system sucks so bad for those in the disability boat.

I sure wish I had some answers as I have no idea what to expect except my lifespan is said to be about 10+ years less due to the illness I have.

Oh well. They'll suck me dry before its over I am convinced!

How very disgusting!

[wcmagumba]

1. Unfettered capitalism...

sucks everyone dry (except for the 10%). imo

[still_one]

7. It is more than just that. While no doubt there is price abuse that goes on, even without that, it

is very labor intensive, expensive, and the people that work in those facilities it is not an easy job.


This is a very difficult problem.

[spooky3]

16. And many caregivers are not well paid nt

[still_one]

18. absolutely.

[Bradshaw3]

27. It is expensive and that money is not going to the workers

We could control the expense but not when it is a way to make huge profits for the ones who own these places.

[still_one]

28. Just how could we control those expenses. What needs to be done is setup a social security type

that everyone contributes to during their life that will be used exclusively for LTC should that individual require it

Doubtful that will happen in this environment though. We will have our hands full trying to prevent Social Security and Medicare from being destroyed

Until the populace wises up, progress will happen very slowly

[RazBerryBeret]

2. My mom is in assisted living

it's over 4k a month in Ohio.
They charge extra for any little thing, and they raise their rates almost yearly.
My mom has dementia, she can't be left alone and she can't reliably take her meds.
She refused to live with any of us, she really just wanted a little apartment on her own.

The only financial assistance she gets is from VA, my dad was a veteran, without that I'm not sure how we would manage. We all fear the veteran benefits getting cut.

I'm not sure how other people manage it; there were 2 married couples in my mom's facility for a while, I can' image THAT cost.

but wow, I thought nursing homes were cheaper!

[CountAllVotes]

4. My BIL went through this recently

He suffered a severe stroke and he wasn't expected to live very long. He was in a place for awhile (nursing home) and it was $9K a month.

Luckily, he pulled out of it! He is back home living in his house now.

I don't know if he has the means to pay $9K a month.

What I do know is that I sure do not have such resources.

Sad to think that Americans that have worked and saved their entire lives find themselves having to sell-out everything before their day comes.

Sickening in fact, plain sickening!

[RazBerryBeret]

6. it IS totally sickening

Some Corporations are making a shit-ton of money off this.
My friends were talking the other day about how they've told their parents to NOT save money to give them when they die. They want their parents to enjoy all their money before they pass. I had to burst her bubble and say, "uh, you may want to save some money for assisted living and nursing homes, cause you never know..."

[spooky3]

3. Agree. One option that may work for those needing

a little less care is to hire assistance as needed while staying in the same apartment. My dad is in a retirement community with independent living, where he now lives, as well as assisted living, which would require him to move to another building. The community has a contract with service providers of differing skills. If he needs someone to come in and cook or clean, that can be bought for a reasonable hourly rate. Someone to come in twice a day for bathing and other personal needs etc. costs more. More skilled nursing visits cost more. But all of this is much less added on to his rent than full time assistance would be.

[RazBerryBeret]

8. This sounds like a great option....

what state is this, if i may ask?

[spooky3]

13. Indiana nt

[CountAllVotes]

10. That is what my BIL did

He got sick of that real fast too.

His son magically appeared with nowhere to live. So, he took him in *again*. Luckily, his son (who is in his 50's) was able to help him out for quite awhile.

However, something went sour (I am guessing) as his son moved out and got a low-income apartment not far from where my BIL lives.

I guess he drops in to see him a few times a week.

Otherwise, I have no idea how he is doing except best I know, the wheelchair is a goner and he's up and around again at the age of 87 years!

[spooky3]

14. Glad he's doing so well!

[drray23]

17. we have that too in our area. its a nice community. you have the option of buying a home in there

and it comes with these services that you can use depending on your needs. It ranges from simple household help, meal deilvery to nursing care, all the way to full care. Its on the campus of the local hospital.

Its very good :

http://villageatwoodsedge.com/

[still_one]

5. Yes it is a major problem, and there are no easy answers. You indicated she has been very close to

death so she might qualify for Hospice, but that won't help with the board and room costs.

They do have insurance that people can buy, but it isn't cheap.

To prepare for such things people need to save when they are very young, and there are annunity vehicles that some use for this eventuality.

Ideally setting up a program for this program like social security, where people contribute to it throughout there lives to be used for this purpose would be the ideal solution

[still_one]

9. The only way this can be solved is if a program such as social security is setup where people

contribute throughout there lives for assisted care should it be necessary.


Unfortunately, unless things change at the voting booth, we will be having a tough enough time preserving Social Security and Medicare which certain forces want to destroy

[CountAllVotes]

11. There was no such thing as "assisted living" when my grandma was alive

She lived to be 81 years old and suffered from dementia. She was living with my uncle.

He did not take her to a doctor. All he wanted was his meals cooked and served to him on a daily basis.

She became delusional and my Dad went and got her out of that house and put her in a nursing home where she died a few months later.

Who paid for what? I do not know. This was in 1976.

[still_one]

12. I understand. The point I am making is for the future what needs to be done. The problem for

future generations will not go away, and I was suggesting a solution for the future generations

[CountAllVotes]

15. The place that retired me had long-term care available

I almost enrolled in it but decided against it as the cost was very high (more than the pittance of a pension I receive!).

Its a good thing I DID NOT do it because the long-term care program went bust. Some retirees paid over $50K into it and now have nothing to show for it.

Last I heard, a class action lawsuit has been formed. Who knows if they'll ever get a cent back (??).

Beyond disgusting in my book!

The people that paid into this are now older and screwed (who will sell LTC to someone in their 70s or 80s? No one or few and far between!).

They played the game and it FAILED.

[still_one]

20. That is the problem, also with LTC insurance. Which is why I suggested for future generation they

really need something setup like social security, where people pay into it throughout there lives for the exclusive purpose of LTC.

Of course some will not ever need it, but it is insurance, and having it mandatory like social security should spread out the risk, and the costs

[3Hotdogs]

19. N.J. ---- $4 -7k, depending on level of service.

Lower, if it is just housing with a couple'a meals.

$7 k + if it involves dementia care.


If you are middle age or older and have assets, run, don't walk to the nearest elder law attorney.


If you or your spouse are combat veterans, V.A. takes care of you. That saved me from bankruptcy when my mother went into dementia.

[CountAllVotes]

22. My husband was drafted into the Korean war

He served in Germany.

The VA hasn't done a fucking thing for him.

He's 1/2 blind and going deaf.

Sickening.

I am taking care of him by the skin of my arse.

I cannot do much, but I try.

This is a suck ass situation to be in and I don't see what some lawyer is going to do for us except ring up a big fat bill.

[3Hotdogs]

23. No offense to your husband, but Germany was not combat.

Non-combat vets don't seem to get much out of V.A.

Regarding the lawyer, as I pointed out, it is important IF you have assets, such as a house, pension and so forth. It is not for everyone.

Does your local town or county have a social services - community welfare office? They can sometimes be helpfiul.


I am sorry I don't have suggestions for everyone.

I wish you well.

[CountAllVotes]

30. He was living in a tank for 2 years

He was a sharp shooter and was on full alert. He recalls making out his will in the tank!

Bay of Pigs --> Cuban Missile Crisis

If that is not WAR I do not know WTF is.

He was prepared to go in. That is what it was all about.

It was not voluntary and he does not want anything to do with the VA.

[3Hotdogs]

32. I had a second thought about his eligibility for VA benfits.

Go to the nearest American Legion post. THe Legion has people who specialize in determining vet benefits eligibility.

You state he wants nothing to do with va.. That is nice but it is not just him. YOU are also paying the price. He has a responsibility to you to see if he can take any pressure off of you.

[CountAllVotes]

33. I know where it is

Last time I went by it, they were scrubbing the POW (prisoners of war) painting off of the building. It may be closed for renovation it appeared.

It is sad he doesn't care.

That is where it is at, he simply does not care (not that I blame him).

Thank you for your good thoughts & wishes. WE need them, both of us.

If I go down hard again, he's screwed and yes, there is a method to my madness.

There was a Special Needs Trust floating around a # of years ago but that too has gone *poof*.

[3Hotdogs]

35. I don't know what inquiries you have made but if you haven't done so,

a trip to the local social services agency can't hurt.

They can at least, give you suggestions for if things deteriorate.


I live in N.J. Our social services are fairly good. I hope its the same with your state/area.

[CountAllVotes]

37. The only help we get is ...................

DRUM ROLL ........................

Low income landline phone & some help w/power bill and that is the end of it.

We are fortunate to have health insurance that is good worldwide with no maximums.

That is the best thing we've got other than 3 cats!

[iamateacher]

24. I have 2 close relatives who are nursing home administrators

Corporations do not make money. Both Genesis and Manorcare, two of the largest chains, are coming out of bankruptcy. Manorcare is now non-profit.
The regulations, both fed and state are unbelievable and very complex, with more regs added every year... Because of increased home care services
the people going into nursing homes and assisted living are sicker than they used to be. ( Patients can stay longer at home. Home care services in Pa. are generally $20 an hour.)
Staffing of nursing homes and assisted living is an ongoing issue, as is upkeep of facilities.
Btw, most continuing care communities (combo of assisted, independent, and musing home) have a buy-in where you have to pay a large amount to get into the community. In the East coast it is about 100,000 to 200,000 thousand at the minimum. So, you sell your home to get in...

[BigmanPigman]

25. This is why people REALLY do lose their homes

to pay for health care. Pre-existing conditions will be the death of millions if Kavanaugh is on the SCOTUS since he will finally destroy the ACA. I will be one of the victims. To stay in a health care facility long term, you lose your home unless you gift it to a relative ahead of time.

[CountAllVotes]

34. I have no "relatives"

n/t

[Ohiogal]

26. How do people in other countries deal with this, I wonder?

Is the US the only country that rob's you blind once you're old and need extra care for daily living?

[BigmanPigman]

36. Other countries either assist their aging relatives in their own homes

or their countries have better social medicine and care for citizens since they pay taxes that go into this type of program for all their citizens. The US spends a ton on military and defense instead of caring for its citizens. We could have free college, 6 months off for new parents, free medical and drugs Rx, month long paid for vacations, free senior care, etc if we weren't a world military power which comes ahead of citizens' lives.

[FailureToCommunicate]

29. That's actually inexpensive for assisted

living. And, gotta say two things: old age is not a "disability". And lastly, I'm from Missouri, it is actually a lovely state.

[CountAllVotes]

31. Old age in her case is not a disability

Also, other things like being blind due to macular degeneration and glaucoma makes life very difficult. Throw in little ability to hear, I believe these are disabilities.

However, my problem is a bonafide disability and I HATE it.

As for Missouri, I have nothing to say about it except it is way to HOT for me. I do best at 69 degrees at all times. Cannot take extreme cold weather either.