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CommonSenseDemocrat

(377 posts)
Sun Jan 24, 2016, 02:16 PM Jan 2016

Recovering alcoholic ... some of the posts on the GD forums make me sad.

Specifically the ones where some young person gets drunk and the video goes viral and that person is shamed on the Internet. I'm surprised on a liberal forum so many people engage in schadenfraude over these incidents, and essentially make fun of substance abuse as if they've never struggled with it or been caught acting stupidly under the influence. If there is one thing I don't like about DU, it is this. This is the only thing I don't like about DU.

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hollysmom

(5,946 posts)
1. If you are talking about the kid that got drunk and killed and paralyzed people.
Sun Jan 24, 2016, 02:47 PM
Jan 2016

he has been supported in previous drinking episodes in his life, he was given an get out of jail card and wasted it on drinking again.
There is one thing to give people understanding for their problem, but another to forgive them their sins/crimes/ etc. To learn from life you have to be held accountable for your actions.

I am probably missing something else, got any examples?

 
2. I was talking about the doctor and the Uber car
Sun Jan 24, 2016, 02:53 PM
Jan 2016

Don't get me wrong, I think if you commit a violent crime under the influence, you need to be held accountable under the law - and I say this as a recovering alcoholic. But there's a difference between a criminal legal action and shaming somebody on the Internet.

hollysmom

(5,946 posts)
5. ok. stupid girl who was drunk indeed
Sun Jan 24, 2016, 05:09 PM
Jan 2016

the comments seem like the usual judging people without information = what people on the internet, including me do.
I mean we never do know what the back story is, we certainly do not know if she struggles with alcohol or just over does it because she can.
I wouldn't be too hard on the posters, it is just an internet thing. I suppose I should think twice about what I post , I am sure I must have made assumptions in the past that may have hurt someone. a good reminder to think twice post once. (tm sort of this old house)
here is the thing, when you need people, they will support you here.

Glassunion

(10,201 posts)
6. I've never been a fan of shaming on any level. It seems like it's our new American pastime.
Fri Apr 22, 2016, 11:05 AM
Apr 2016

Shaming someone is a horrible practice. Since the advent of the internet, we have found a new way to brand a scarlet letter on those who behave in a way that we do not approve. I've seen comments here on DU where those have made statements that someone deserves shaming because they did (x). Personally, I will retreat at that point regardless of the situation.

To me personally, when I see someone acting as an advocate for shaming someone for whatever reason, I do instantly think less of that person. Especially in today's age, where a shaming can cost someone whatever shred of dignity they have left, their friends, their jobs, etc... These people who are shaming seem to take it to the next level. They practically stalk the people, find their Facebook account, figure out who their friends are, find their employer, etc... They shame them on their social media, make sure all their friends know, as well as venting their unrighteous anger on these people's employers.

I am far from perfect, and have made poor life choices. I cannot imagine if some of that were brought to light to my friends, or employer. The problem I see with shaming, especially for a singular incident, is that it is such a broad indictment of oneself that it is near impossible to find redemption. The singular incident becomes the whole definition of the person's character for which they cannot apologize, or make amends.

Jemmons

(711 posts)
7. There is actually reason to believe that shaming is something that contributes to addiction
Sat Apr 23, 2016, 03:55 AM
Apr 2016
...The shame might very well be specifically connected to the choice of dealing with personal suffering instead of the objective situation that is the cause of the suffering...


From
http://www.resourceaddiction.com/shame-pain-addiction/
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