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raccoon

(31,089 posts)
Fri Dec 14, 2018, 07:37 PM Dec 2018

Al Anon suggested opening says, " In Al-Anon we discover that no situation is really hopeless."


OK, maybe this seems unimportant, but it's bothering me.

Sometimes, a situation is fucking hopeless. Like when my mother took me and my sibs and left my
alcoholic father. Think "The Shining" when Jack Torrance was losing it. If we had stayed in that house with him, very likely we'd have ended up on the front page of the local paper.

I'd say that was a hopeless situation, and when a situation is hopeless, you need to get the hell out of it.

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Al Anon suggested opening says, " In Al-Anon we discover that no situation is really hopeless." (Original Post) raccoon Dec 2018 OP
I get what you are saying, but "getting the hell out" is hope for many JDC Dec 2018 #1
I can empathize with having an alcoholic parent. Adsos Letter Dec 2018 #2
Absolutely. Shit like that is in the same Voltaire2 Dec 2018 #3
You are still with us :) violetpastille Dec 2018 #4
Hopeless life. stevil Feb 2019 #6
Thank you all for your kind responses. Nt raccoon Dec 2018 #5

JDC

(10,081 posts)
1. I get what you are saying, but "getting the hell out" is hope for many
Fri Dec 14, 2018, 07:43 PM
Dec 2018

They feel stuck or afraid to go. Hence hopeless.

This is meant, I believe, to empower those in Al Anon. Give them the courage to do what your mom did. Not everyone has that.

Adsos Letter

(19,459 posts)
2. I can empathize with having an alcoholic parent.
Fri Dec 14, 2018, 08:03 PM
Dec 2018

My mom was alcoholic, went through two recovery programs plus AA, and relapsed each time. Finally developed a wet brain, and died at age 50.

I was an only kid, and I was stuck in the middle of all of the dysfuntion and fighting between my parents. She spent and borrowed pretty freely, and fights about money and drinking became a huge issue. As soon as I turned 17 I joined the Army to get away from home.

My dad always blamed me for my mom's drinking, insisting that "if you were a better kid your mom wouldn't drink so much." I'm 63 now, and I know objectively that it wasn't true, but on an emotional level it still does damage. Some things sink deeply into the core of who we are, and can be very difficult to undo.

While I agree with the other poster about the phrase being designed to bolster those in relationship with alcoholics, I also understand what you are saying. Sometimes you just have to let go.

Peace be with you, raccoon.




Voltaire2

(12,619 posts)
3. Absolutely. Shit like that is in the same
Fri Dec 14, 2018, 08:07 PM
Dec 2018

bucket of bullshit as “god doesn’t give you more than you can handle”.

There are hopeless situations.

Sometimes you get dealt a really bad hand.

violetpastille

(1,483 posts)
4. You are still with us :)
Fri Dec 14, 2018, 08:08 PM
Dec 2018
Where there is life there is hope.

Your mom was a hero to get you kids away from death and towards light and hope.

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