Amazing how depression can make daily life seem like a daily marathon.
Just getting through each day from getting out of bed to the end of the day feels like a marathon run with an extra set of invisible weights you have to lug around. Last week I came home and literally couldn't stop crying for 30+ mins several days. Of course letting your health go all to shit, also because of the depression, only compounds the issue.
Those close to me, parents, are very frustrated because I'm not dong anything to help myself. And because of my self destructive behaviour. I don't blame them one bit but it's difficult when just trying to just stay the course at university without dropping out again seems to suck up all my energy and more. My perfectionist leanings don't help any as I'm still maintaining something like an 80% average or better but feel like I'm letting myself down even here.
It's funny I can still maintain a semblance of a normal happyish person at school and among the few people I meet daily outside the home.
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I hope you can hang in there and that things will get better for you. 
as a misdiagnosed bipolar 2. It was so hard!
I hope that things will even out for you and that the load becomes lighter!
And wanted to acknowledge your struggle. You are not alone. And it gets better. Sometime you do have to act 'as if' and the rest will follow.
Response to Locut0s (Original post)
He or she would be able to help you. Dealing with depression is very hard but as you said that you have " self destructive behaviour " it gets more complicated .Please, talk to someone soon. They will be able to help .Please, please, reach out.
