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Tue May 8, 2018, 12:05 AM

I yelled at the dog

He is a good dog, but a touchy one and snarled at me when I asked him to get out of the bed. My husband proceeded to lecture me on treating the dog right, and that he knows him since he is here during the day with our dogs. I get up at 4 am to train and exercise these dogs, I do agility with our gentle girl and am training the young boy in obedience, I put more hours into training them than I can count, so I got pissed at him, then he goes there, telling me I am nothing but miserable (fighting hell in depression for the past year, trying to find the right med). He said he was tired of my bullshit and if I didn't cut it out I could leave. I know he did not mean it, but all of it makes me wonder if all this fight against depression is even worth it? He has bi-polar disorder and sometimes things can go this way for a bit, but this sure triggered me about when my family took my cats away and never told me what they did with them when I lost the ability to care for myself, I drank a lot back then, so destroying what was left of me would be considered right and proper. I didn't have a pet for years because I didn't want anything in my life that would hurt if someone removed.

I went from the happiest I had been a year, going out into the once dreaded light and setting up my first ever veggie garden, to wishing I had a gun to put to my head so no one could ever take anything from me again. Just a bad night, I will be ok. I just need to be more careful in how I behave, story of my life.

Please don't tell me to leave my husband, that would totally mess with my head, he has been incredibly kind throughout my depression until tonight, I just have a hard time dealing with put downs and threats, even isolated and momentary ones.

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Reply I yelled at the dog (Original post)
get the red out May 2018 OP
sharedvalues May 2018 #1
applegrove May 2018 #2
Tobin S. May 2018 #3
NBachers May 2018 #4
get the red out May 2018 #5
pansypoo53219 May 2018 #6
mopinko May 2018 #7

Response to get the red out (Original post)

Tue May 8, 2018, 12:09 AM

1. All the best to you

Sounds like the year has had high points, good for you.

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Response to get the red out (Original post)

Tue May 8, 2018, 12:13 AM

2. I make a big to do when my cat Huey gets out of hand. If he just wants

attention I am very patient. He can bug me as much as he wants. But when his claws come out or he starts to bite in a non playfully way I will say something loud. And i will remove him from whatever high place he is on. The clue is to make it un fun for him to cross that line of unacceptable behaviour. Don't know if it would work with dogs. Vibes on your health. The right treatment for depression is golden. Keep on it. And like they say: when you are going through he'll keep going!!!!

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Response to get the red out (Original post)

Tue May 8, 2018, 12:17 AM

3. I'm sorry you're having a hard time right now, gtro.

Both my wife and I have said things to each other that hurt us, but those things were not really indicative of how we ordinarily truly felt. It hurts very badly to be hurt by someone you love. And I know it hurts just as bad to hurt someone you really love. I would actually rather be in your shoes right now than your husband's if he knows how you are truly feeling right now and how his words cut right through you.

But this seems to be a part of the human condition sometimes. Just be careful to take note if hurtful words become a pattern with him.

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Response to get the red out (Original post)

Tue May 8, 2018, 02:36 AM

4. I agree- A dog that snarls at you when you ask him to get out of bed needs to be addressed sternly.

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Response to NBachers (Reply #4)

Tue May 8, 2018, 04:34 AM

5. He got the water bottle

Then started making up with me. My yelling was a knee-jerk reaction then I corrected him, but he's a young dog and I believe does need humane correction for that.

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Response to get the red out (Original post)

Tue May 8, 2018, 06:12 AM

6. yelling is barking. i find a stern look controled the neighbor dogs.

heck, they obeyed my arm gestures. i was protecting a stray cat behind me. 3 barky dogs froze.

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Response to get the red out (Original post)

Tue May 8, 2018, 03:33 PM

7. hang in there honey. relationships are hard.

hopefully the make up will be good.

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