We found my cat's remains today

[csziggy]

When my husband and I were in the UK last fall, he disappeared. The woman taking care of him fed him twice a day, brushed him (at least until he'd attack her, which he always would even with us), and spent time with him. One morning in September he just wasn't there. He had his own cat door so he could come and go as he wanted.

He was seventeen and a half and had been looking pretty frail so I had not been sure he'd last until we got home. We were sad and Julie, the cat caretaker was devastated.

Today while looking at where we will be doing some re-fencing we found his skeletal remains. They had not been very disturbed. It looks as though he had curled up for a nap and just didn't wake up.

It brought back his loss more than I expected. I adopted him from the animal shelter when he was about four weeks old and only weighed four ounces. At least we finally know what happened to him.

[TexasBushwhacker]

1. I'm so sorry

17 1/2 is a good long life. I'm sure he was well loved.

[Skittles]

2. cats will do that

if they know end is near and they can wander off



Grieve not,
Nor speak of me with tears,
But laugh and talk of me
As if I were beside you.
I loved You so
‘twas heaven here with you.

Isla Paschal Richardson

[LiberalFighter]

25. :( and :)

[Freddie]

32. That's what my cat "Old Fred" did

He was 18 and losing weight, slowing down. He NEVER even tried to go outside so we weren’t always careful about making sure the back door was latched. He slipped out one summer day and we never even found his remains. It’s their instinct to hide and be alone at the end.

[irisblue]

3. 🕯️ I am sorry for your loss

Please tell us his name

[csziggy]

11. I should have said - his name was Tashi

I'd post a picture but my webhost migrated my website and I have to go back in and reset the permissions for my pictures.

He was a tabby point Siamese with a swirl on each side.

[irisblue]

12. He sounds a fine cat.

[csziggy]

16. He was pretty cool

Not very smart but the bravest cat I ever owned. At most he weighed ten pounds - but he'd stare down pit bulls, chased a fox off the porch, and chased a deer out of the garden. And just the neatest markings.

I miss having a cat but right now we're starting an addition on the house. As part of it, we're re-screening the side porch. When we do, we're not putting a new cat door out of the porch but will leave the one from the house to that porch. Our future cats will be indoor only and can have a catio on the screened porch to enjoy the outdoors!

[I_UndergroundPanther]

4. That's so sad

I can't imagine your sorrow.

[sinkingfeeling]

5. Very sorry. I've had two that simply disappeared and that is awful.

[jls4561]

6. You always miss a friend when they leave

but you always know that love was shared.

[MontanaMama]

7. Oh dear. It can't imagine

the relief of finding him and the sadness mixed together.... I once lost a beloved cat...his name was Toby. He went out one night and never came back. I always thought an owl or coyote got him. It was devastating to not know what happened.

I’m very sorry for your loss.

[lunasun]

8. what a shock for you My condolences and may you find some comfort in closure during your grief

[NanceGreggs]

9. So sorry.

My 15-year-old Persian disappeared one day. He was a house cat, and terrified of being outdoors, so we knew he wouldn't have simply wandered off.

I was later told that cats know when "it's their time", and will seek a quiet place to lay down and die - even places they normally would not go.

I have never found his remains - but I suspect they're somewhere in the backyard, long buried under years of fallen leaves, melted snow drifts, and the heaviness of memories past.

My heart is with you.

[csziggy]

13. I think not knowing is harder

Over the forty years we've lived on this farm, we've had a few just disappear. All the rest are buried here.

Since there are coyotes in the area, I've worried that his last moments were terrifying, so finding his remains helped. It was clear he was not eaten by a large predator.

[NanceGreggs]

18. It is harder.

We put up flyers in the 'hood, asking for his safe return, just in case he actually did 'wander off' and had been found by a neighbour.

But we already knew in our hearts he had crossed the Rainbow Bridge.

This happened over thirty years ago - and as I am now preparing to sell my house, I can't stop thinking that I will be leaving his final resting place as well.

[csziggy]

24. Leaving would be hard

We've been here over forty years now and I am not sure how many cats, dogs, and horses we've buried here. Lots, I know. Most died of old age, some died from congenital problems, one was killed in an accident, a few disappeared.

I can't imagine leaving this place with all the memories. Our plans are to stay here for the rest of our lives and hopefully be buried here ourselves.

[mike_c]

10. I'm sorry, csziggy.

We lost our oldest last week, almost 20 years old. I picked up her ashes today. It never gets any easier.

[Dan]

14. Ten years ago

I had to put my son’s cat down, she was 19.5 years of age. After a few hundred dollars in vet bills, she just couldn’t control her bladder. I suspect that it had to do with the contaminated cat food from China (or something). Even after several months of trying to address her problem it just had to be done. Telling my grown son almost broke my heart - he was in grad school at the time. It was the hardest thing I have ever done and to this day, I feel guilty. But in your grief you have the memories...

I am sorry for your loss.

[Bluepinky]

15. I know how you feel. I have lost three cats (and a dog) over the years.

It is always very sad, but I’m glad for the time we had together. ‘Tis better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all.’

You had many years with your friend, and you will think of him often. He was loved in life and had a peaceful death.

I like to think that after my own death, I will be reunited with my favorite beings, be they human or non-human.

[dweller]

17. he curled up in the lap

of his beloved, this Earth of which he was a creature
he found the area where the boundaries were down
put dirt on him if you must, and plant a tribute vegetation
that you can observe, through time, his return

all Life is a lesson, how can we be so lucky?

✌🏼

[csziggy]

35. That is beautiful! Thank you. nt

[chillfactor]

19. Believe me.....

I understand the pain you feel acutely......this past Wednesday my darling little girl, Fajita. died in my arms.. She was 18 years old...a long life for even a Chihuahua …. I cried for two days. I shed tears every night when I crawl into bed. Fajita slept with me every night....curled up in my arms. She was my family as I live alone,

[JudyM]

36. .

So sorry, chillfactor. My little fur ball died in my arms, too, with a needle, when it became clear she was suffering. The pain will soften with time... and the still continuous love bond will eventually make you smile...

[csziggy]

38. Fajita was loved. What a lucky pup!

My sister had a Chihuahua when I was a kid. When she went away to college she couldn't take him with her and he stayed with my parents. Years later, after I'd gone to college ChiChi (his full name was Don de Chichi Tipitoleo) went outside one day and never returned. Mom offered a reward to the neighborhood kids if they could find him dead or alive. No one ever found him. To this day, almost fifty years later, I wonder what happened to that little dog.

I hope you can find another pet to keep you company.

[Laffy Kat]

20. Oh I am so sorry.

I am glad you had closure, though.

[Loryn]

21. I'm so sorry.

It's heartbreaking.

[Dem2theMax]

22. I am so sorry.

I can't imagine how that must have felt.
I hope that in time, this will give you some comfort in having the answer you weren't able to get until now.
It does seem as though he went peacefully. Hold on to that.

[InAbLuEsTaTe]

23. Been there... sincerest condolences.

[Demovictory9]

26. ..

[emmaverybo]

27. So terribly sorry for your shock and loss. Because you loved him so and saw to his good care, and

he was where he knew love, was near care, I imagine he passed over dreaming you held him, as truly your heart always did. This is how some people pass. I have seen it. God bless you.

[lunatica]

28. I'm crying with you.

[CountAllVotes]

29. Sorry to read this csziggy

At least you know anyway.

He had a long life and you cared for him quite well.

May he rest in peace!

[wisteria]

30. So very sorry for your heartbreaking loss

It is so painful to lose a part of your heart.

[PatrickforO]

31. My condolences for your loss. It is hard to lose a cat, especially if he just disappears like

yours did. I'm so glad for you that you found his remains, and that he seems to have died peacefully.

My family just had to put down our 19 year old tuxedo. His kidneys were failing, he had a heart murmur and severe arthritis. We kept him as healthy and happy as we could for that last few months, but one day he couldn't quite make his hindquarters work - he couldn't walk.

So we had a vet come to our home. She was great, very compassionate. She listened to our story, made friends with our kitty and then put him down. We got one of those paw imprints in clay that I can paint to remind us of our friend.

Anyway, warm regards to you and your husband.

[Sanity Claws]

33. I am sorry for your loss

He had a good long life. I have had a couple of cats live until 15 but never 17.5.
I have had several rescued adult cats over the years but the cat that I was closest with and most fond of was the one I raised since he was a kitten.

[NurseJackie]

34. ...

😢😿🕯

[JudyM]

37. Hugs to you

and sweet memories of Tashi to hold a loving spot of healing in your heart ...

[Maraya1969]

39. I'm so sorry.

RIP sweet kittie.

[drmeow]

40. It's hard enough when we know they passed

when they just disappear it's devastating. I'm so sorry for your loss.

[csziggy]

41. I feel slightly better now that I know what happened to him

So does Julie, the cat caretaker. She's felt guilty about losing him for months. Now she knows it was not her fault. She still mourns him, but she can let go the guilt.

[drmeow]

42. I hear you

I made the very difficult decision to put down my 18 year old cat rather than leave her under the care of my pet sitter. It actually made the decision easier because it really was very, very clear that she was at the end of her life but if we'd been staying in town I might have been tempted to see what another few days would do - which would have just unnecessarily prolonged things.

I'm glad you got closure.

[csziggy]

43. I thought about putting him to sleep

Summer of 2018 he was doing very poorly, got down to skin and bones. But with a lot of attention and special foods, he was looking very good for an old kitty.

If he'd declined last summer the way he had the summer before, I would have put him to sleep before we left. But he was looking great and seemed to be enjoying life, so I decided not to. I'm sorry I was not with him towards the end of his life, but from what the catsitter said, he had a good last couple of months. He was not sickly which why his disappearance was so worrying.

Closure is good - I'd been worrying about where he might have been.