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What I learned today on DU - (Original Post) Tuesday Afternoon Mar 2014 OP
Glad I missed that conversation. Squinch Mar 2014 #1
Learning to Cringe - Tuesday Afternoon Mar 2014 #3
I am glad to hear it! Squinch Mar 2014 #5
I learned that cinnabonbon Mar 2014 #2
cos you know ... Tuesday Afternoon Mar 2014 #4
The door thing again? ismnotwasm Mar 2014 #12
it will always be a Doors post for me when I read something as stupid Tuesday Afternoon Mar 2014 #21
Oh, FFS!!!! Here's what I effing learned: if a female judge takes a woman's kids away from Squinch Mar 2014 #6
from what I am given to understand ... Tuesday Afternoon Mar 2014 #7
Indeed, possibly it has always been here but we did not see it GeoWilliam750 Mar 2014 #8
Wow. That is really well put. Squinch Mar 2014 #9
+10000000000000000000000000000000000000000 BainsBane Mar 2014 #15
I do pity them. Tuesday Afternoon Mar 2014 #20
I don't fucking pity them ismnotwasm Mar 2014 #23
They are most definitely stirring shit. Tuesday Afternoon Mar 2014 #24
No, there is no reason to empathise with such people GeoWilliam750 Mar 2014 #43
thank you mercuryblues Mar 2014 #52
OK, I need a pm with a link or something gollygee Mar 2014 #10
That oblique references to no doubt sex-hating uptight alerting feminists ismnotwasm Mar 2014 #11
perfect song and spot on Tuesday Afternoon Mar 2014 #25
.. ismnotwasm Mar 2014 #31
it's the type of things said by those who can't get anyone to have sex with them JI7 Mar 2014 #13
Coincidentally, I'm watching a rerun of "Women who make America," and this quote was just said: Squinch Mar 2014 #14
^^^ THIS ^^^ MadrasT Mar 2014 #16
Exactly ismnotwasm Mar 2014 #17
And the women on the left, even more so. nt redqueen Mar 2014 #50
Yes. Squinch Mar 2014 #53
I just learned that someone is having "porn wars" ismnotwasm Mar 2014 #18
isn't it amazing how someone can start a thread with no link for proof and just by Tuesday Afternoon Mar 2014 #19
They must be bored ismnotwasm Mar 2014 #22
You know, I can't imagine that invisible porn is all that interesting. Certainly not worth a war. Squinch Mar 2014 #28
LOL ismnotwasm Mar 2014 #34
Maybe they NEED the practice... Squinch Mar 2014 #44
Strange Brew DreamGypsy Mar 2014 #30
bless you DreamGypsy Tuesday Afternoon Mar 2014 #32
In Search of the Lost Chord. DreamGypsy Mar 2014 #40
Heh! ismnotwasm Mar 2014 #33
woah. almost posted that one, went old school instead. Tuesday Afternoon Mar 2014 #35
GMTA! ismnotwasm Mar 2014 #36
indeed, good company Tuesday Afternoon Mar 2014 #37
They appear to be having these "wars" with the gremlins in their heads. Which, admittedly, must be Squinch Mar 2014 #27
I noticed one was desperate for a fight with you BainsBane Mar 2014 #54
Hahaha! A good day I still like to avoid. nt babylonsister Mar 2014 #26
I missed that lesson proudretiredvet Mar 2014 #29
I learn that if a feminist derivates by one syllable BainsBane Mar 2014 #38
^^^^Especially this part: Squinch Mar 2014 #45
I learned that I should let people be victims to domestic violence. Gravitycollapse Mar 2014 #39
I saw that ismnotwasm Mar 2014 #41
There is no impulse other than empathy for the perpetrators of the violence Squinch Mar 2014 #46
Say BainsBane Mar 2014 #47
Yes, they were harassing me by private message. Gravitycollapse Mar 2014 #48
You are unlikely to hear back BainsBane Mar 2014 #49
seems that DU has its own version of The Silent Majority ... Tuesday Afternoon Mar 2014 #51
I am so glad JustAnotherGen Mar 2014 #42

Squinch

(50,774 posts)
1. Glad I missed that conversation.
Fri Mar 7, 2014, 05:57 PM
Mar 2014

Here's a not-good thing, though. Every time I see that headline in HoF, I just know that someone here was subjected to something truly egregious and ridiculous. I hate that I know to cringe in advance about things that are said on a site that calls itself "Democratic." Sorry you had to read that crap.

Tuesday Afternoon

(56,912 posts)
3. Learning to Cringe -
Fri Mar 7, 2014, 06:03 PM
Mar 2014

I am sorry to have read it and, sorrier to know that people actually think that way.

but, Hey Squinch

Life in the real world is good. So good



cinnabonbon

(860 posts)
2. I learned that
Fri Mar 7, 2014, 06:01 PM
Mar 2014

if you disapprove of objectification of women, or criticize third-wave feminism, you're a fauxminist!

...Better if they pay you for sex? Yikes. Sounds like it's been an educational day on DU.

Tuesday Afternoon

(56,912 posts)
4. cos you know ...
Fri Mar 7, 2014, 06:06 PM
Mar 2014

all those sex workers are getting paid and, they all truly love their job.

So, if you really love what you do, it is not really working, right?

oh yeah,

and

Doors.

A post like this is never complete until someone holds the door for someone else

Tuesday Afternoon

(56,912 posts)
21. it will always be a Doors post for me when I read something as stupid
Fri Mar 7, 2014, 10:46 PM
Mar 2014

as what brought about this OP. It is just ... Doors. Derp. Duh. and Stupid.

Doors.

haha.

Fucking Doors.

Squinch

(50,774 posts)
6. Oh, FFS!!!! Here's what I effing learned: if a female judge takes a woman's kids away from
Fri Mar 7, 2014, 06:39 PM
Mar 2014

her because she had an affair and an abortion AFTER her divorce was final, it's probably a good thing. Because the judge was female. Nevermind that there is evidence that the father, to whom custody was given, was violent.

Jeesus, Mary and Frank! Is it trolls, or what? Am I just seeing more of it, and it's always been here, or is this really becoming the break room for the "men who can't quite hide their hatred for women" club??

Tuesday Afternoon

(56,912 posts)
7. from what I am given to understand ...
Fri Mar 7, 2014, 06:46 PM
Mar 2014

these same kind of crap posts were on DU2 but, the moderating system usually dealt with this type of stuff so quickly that we did not realize this was always going on.

Now, with transparency and jury established community standards and being able to click and open hidden posts ...

We are now welcome to the seamy underworld that was always DU.



*feeling your pain*

GeoWilliam750

(2,519 posts)
8. Indeed, possibly it has always been here but we did not see it
Fri Mar 7, 2014, 06:57 PM
Mar 2014

They are simply powerless people trying to feel a little less powerless, usually by showing that they can still have power over someone else - preferably women. They crave attention and respect whilst only finding pity.

Perhaps this is as it should be. They are to be pitied, as they pity themselves.

The problem is that pity seldom turns to respect, and self-pity almost never becomes self-respect.

Tuesday Afternoon

(56,912 posts)
20. I do pity them.
Fri Mar 7, 2014, 10:43 PM
Mar 2014

Have told them I pity them to their cyber face. Trouble with me is I hold in contempt that very thing which I pity.

Supposedly, I am to empathize with them.

really?

ismnotwasm

(41,921 posts)
23. I don't fucking pity them
Fri Mar 7, 2014, 10:56 PM
Mar 2014

I think they're assholes, I think they stir shit and I think they enjoy it. Yes, they're clearly damaged and are deserving of pity, but I'm not that kind

Tuesday Afternoon

(56,912 posts)
24. They are most definitely stirring shit.
Fri Mar 7, 2014, 11:01 PM
Mar 2014

Just goes to show that damaged people are capable of stirring shit. The more damaged the more shit they stir.

Time was when chumming, baiting and shit stirring were dealt with more severely on this site. and more quickly.

There is another word for all this, of course, rhymes with bowl and lives under a bridge.

GeoWilliam750

(2,519 posts)
43. No, there is no reason to empathise with such people
Sat Mar 8, 2014, 10:33 AM
Mar 2014

To hold in contempt and to pity might be mostly the same thing, except possibly that the object of contempt tends to have been more annoying, and the object of pity more pathetic.

I, too, cannot empathise with those people, and will not spend any minutes of my allotted years paying them the slightest attention, but am to some degree saddened that people who might otherwise lead better lives, instead drown in their cyber-bile - and are thus truly pitiful. They might have made their lives better, and by inference might have made a positive difference in world in which I live; that they have not saddens me, and makes the world in which we all live less, not more. I cannot help them, and will pay them no mind.

Their weakness does not become my strength, and I have no need of their approbation. I no longer have time to try to heal insatiable vampires, or to fill their limitless void - my minutes are numbered, and I have none for them. My time is mostly for the ten people about whom I deeply care.

I do have time however for what many of you on the HoF forum have to say - and believe that some of my minutes are worth spending here.

Whilst I may not agree with everything that everyone here says, I am better for having read many of the things you have posted and discussed here.

ismnotwasm

(41,921 posts)
11. That oblique references to no doubt sex-hating uptight alerting feminists
Fri Mar 7, 2014, 07:47 PM
Mar 2014

Are cutting edge humor. Arms are broken patting one selves on backs.

Also, there are number of people by process of response assessment are lousy lovers. Ick.

But it did bring to mind a great song


Tuesday Afternoon

(56,912 posts)
25. perfect song and spot on
Fri Mar 7, 2014, 11:03 PM
Mar 2014


Rock on- gold dust woman
Take your silver spoon
And dig your grave

Heartless challenge
Pick your path and I'll pray

Wake up in the morning
See your sunrise- loves- to go down
Lousy lovers- pick their prey
But they never cry out loud

Did she make you cry
Make you break down
Shatter your illusions of love
Is it over now- do you know how
Pick up the pieces and go home.

Rock on- ancient woman <- Should be Rock on - Ancient Queen
Follow those who pale
In your shadow

Rulers make bad lovers
You better put your kingdom up for sale

Did she make you cry
Make you break down
Shatter your illusions of love
Is it over now- do you know how
Pickup the pieces and go home.

Squinch

(50,774 posts)
14. Coincidentally, I'm watching a rerun of "Women who make America," and this quote was just said:
Fri Mar 7, 2014, 08:32 PM
Mar 2014

"The bad behavior toward women by the guys on the left was particularly heartbreaking. It was a particularly intense betrayal."

That is my problem with the boys' club of DU.

Tuesday Afternoon

(56,912 posts)
19. isn't it amazing how someone can start a thread with no link for proof and just by
Fri Mar 7, 2014, 10:41 PM
Mar 2014

claiming the porn war was started again .... wtf? down the rabbit hole.

thinking what?

chumming.

that is what it is called.

ismnotwasm

(41,921 posts)
22. They must be bored
Fri Mar 7, 2014, 10:47 PM
Mar 2014

I couldn't find any links-- I have kept one poster on ignore because I think he's a troll, but he posts political stuff, usually.


So now it's "invisible porn wars".

Strange brew, that's all I'm sayin

DreamGypsy

(2,252 posts)
30. Strange Brew
Sat Mar 8, 2014, 12:15 AM
Mar 2014

I'm probably going to regret this reply...but I have visited this thread a couple of times today, trying to gather enough context through the fog of innuendo and sarcasm, and through the subtle conversational connotations of shared e-personal relationships, ... to figure out "What's going on" (thanks, Marvin Gaye). I would have much appreciated if the original post by Tuesday Afternoon (a pseudonym presumably chosen from the Moody Blues' first hit) had linked to the post where she/he learned those things on DU today (reminiscent of Tom Paxton's What Did You Learn in School Today), 'cause I couldn't figure that out myself.

Then, I discovered that someone had replied with a Gold Dust Woman (Fleetwood Mac) video. Where does that fit in???

So, when I read your comment, "Strange brew, that's all I'm sayin", suddenly I had a piton to which I could attach a rope!!!

So, my question is, does anyone really believe that Eric Clapton ever actually looked like this...

Tuesday Afternoon

(56,912 posts)
32. bless you DreamGypsy
Sat Mar 8, 2014, 12:58 AM
Mar 2014


and NO, I can NOT believe that Eric Clapton ever looked like that.

and just because ,,,

DreamGypsy

(2,252 posts)
40. In Search of the Lost Chord.
Sat Mar 8, 2014, 02:38 AM
Mar 2014

Gosh. I'm honored by your reply. Seriously. Tuesday... Afternoon...I'm just beginning to see...

I drove my parents' Cadillac, and a couple of friends, from Idaho Falls to Pocatello, to see the Moody Blues.

I'm so glad....my Eric Clapton looks more like this...



...and I'm so glad I don't look like Jack Bruce, yet ...



...though being an all time great bass player...would be quite a kick.

ismnotwasm

(41,921 posts)
33. Heh!
Sat Mar 8, 2014, 12:59 AM
Mar 2014

Yes I do . He's an interesting person besides being a sublime musician. I shudder to think how many friends and lovers he lost to drug and alcohol addiction, and among the many things he's involved with this is one

http://www.rockersinrecovery.org

Don't worry about the thread--it's just a bit 'o venting

Here's Clapton from 5 years back





Squinch

(50,774 posts)
27. They appear to be having these "wars" with the gremlins in their heads. Which, admittedly, must be
Fri Mar 7, 2014, 11:11 PM
Mar 2014

pretty scary little beings.

Think Pee Wee Herman doing that fly-swatting motion he did when he got anxious. That's what it's making me think of.

BainsBane

(53,003 posts)
54. I noticed one was desperate for a fight with you
Sun Mar 9, 2014, 04:30 AM
Mar 2014

They are incensed they aren't getting the attention they so badly want. Must be the BennyBoy approach to online posting. Miserable on a Friday night, go find some women on line to visit all the problems in their lives on. I won't be feeding their shit fests with as much as a single post. I say let them wallow in their own self pity and rage.

BainsBane

(53,003 posts)
38. I learn that if a feminist derivates by one syllable
Sat Mar 8, 2014, 01:27 AM
Mar 2014

from something an anti-feminist says in summarizing a position, she is creating "straw." When a man takes a comment one person says and tries to broad brush all the evil radical feminists who make the lives of poor downtrodden men miserable and someone challenges him on that assessment, he is responded to in a fit of rage and called "the most dishonest person" ever. Don't dare assert feminists are intelligent people with nuanced arguments. If someone wants to make it fit their one-dimensional view of the world, it is an outrage to challenge them on it. I've learned that some people are best left alone to wallow in their own self-pity and rage rather than be engaged.



Squinch

(50,774 posts)
45. ^^^^Especially this part:
Sat Mar 8, 2014, 11:09 AM
Mar 2014

"left alone to wallow in their own self-pity and rage rather than be engaged."

Some of the Pee Wee Hermans doing the "swat the imaginary enemy" dance appear to be doing metaphorical handsprings in order to engage SOMEONE, ANYONE in a fight.




Gravitycollapse

(8,155 posts)
39. I learned that I should let people be victims to domestic violence.
Sat Mar 8, 2014, 02:26 AM
Mar 2014

Because it's apparently none of my damn business.

ismnotwasm

(41,921 posts)
41. I saw that
Sat Mar 8, 2014, 03:54 AM
Mar 2014

Friggin weirdo. I didn't want to get too involved in that thread because of the pig pile, but I did want to tell you I always speak up-- whether that means call the cops or yelling at situations. One time I saw two thugs dragging a third thug down the street and half beating his ass. I had my husband stop the car so I could yell What The Fuck at these assholes. I'm not stupid; this was day light and there were people around, but nobody cared. They just let it happen. I was pissed. They let him go after I cussed them out.


My husband is worse than me if he thinks someone is being harmed. He's the type of guy that always stopped to help a stalled vehicle, and would never allow a situation continue that sounded dangerous. He'd call the cops in a New York second

I'm a nurse so I always jump out at accidents if the first responders haven't gotten there.


To me these are civic responsibilities. Don't listen to the assholes. They're wrong and disturbed

Squinch

(50,774 posts)
46. There is no impulse other than empathy for the perpetrators of the violence
Sat Mar 8, 2014, 11:12 AM
Mar 2014

that would lead someone to take that "none of your business" position in response to obvious domestic violence.

BainsBane

(53,003 posts)
47. Say
Sat Mar 8, 2014, 04:30 PM
Mar 2014

I was told someone from that thread was harassing you. That should not be tolerated. I hope you reported the PMs to the administrators.

Gravitycollapse

(8,155 posts)
48. Yes, they were harassing me by private message.
Sat Mar 8, 2014, 04:38 PM
Mar 2014

It is actually a host for the Lounge. They threatened to "remember" that I had their post hidden even though I wasn't the one who reported it. Then they brought up a couple of my past posts regarding the disillusionment of my previous relationship. They said I was "obsessive," "creepy," and "abusive" despite the fact that I left the relationship because I was being neglected and abused.

It was actually quite disgusting. I reported it to the administration but haven't heard back yet.

BainsBane

(53,003 posts)
49. You are unlikely to hear back
Sat Mar 8, 2014, 04:43 PM
Mar 2014

But it will figure into their overall assessment of the poster should issues continue to arise.

The behavior you describe is abusive and not surprising such a person would be angry that you reported the abusive behavior of others to the police.

Remember that you did the right thing, and I would encourage you to do the same in the future. Knowing that neighbors are paying attention may help keep that couple from escalating their violence. Please don't let the reaction of an unstable person deter you from acting as a responsible citizen. Remember the vast majority of DUers support you.

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