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ismnotwasm

(41,976 posts)
Thu Jul 10, 2014, 03:13 AM Jul 2014

So my daughter just had her daughter

A couple of hours ago. She uses midwives-- this is her first girl, fourth and last child.

So I was bemused at all the changes. I had my daughter ay 17, she had my oldest grandson at 19, so I've been a grandmother since my mid thirties. For my oldest grandchild, I was her couch, she lay prone, and I helped her through her contractions, helped her through the birth, was her coach counting.

Tonight, she lays on her knees, with her upper body elevated. Earlier she had able to deal the pain by walking, pacing really. She refuses drugs. They put her in the jacuzzi bath, and shortly after she can feel the baby trying to come, and she can no longer hold back pushing (her last check she had only been dilated 5cm)

So there she is, in the position she found most comfortable--NOT on her back pushing outward, but letting gravity assist her. No counting, just gentle encouragement and advice from the midwife and the nurse. Her husband is there, rubbing her back, mostly silent support, I'm there just with my hands on her back, quieter as well (I did whisper "she has hair" when the baby was crowning)

Anyway, when the baby came out and as they were cleaning her, before "cutting the cord" they hand the baby to my daughter. She's cleaned up and my daughters husband does the cord thing.

Once the placenta has passed and everybody is cleaned up-- the baby is put to her breast, and with a little encouragement latches on.

No more fuss than nessisary, just a peaceful albeit painful, birth.

So I found this article by a midwife

26 Ways to Change Birth Globally
by Sara Wickham, RM [Editor's Note: This article originally appeared in Midwifery Today Issue 53 (Spring 2000), page 28.]

This action list of small things all midwives can do to change societal attitudes toward birth and to promote midwifery and the midwifery model was derived from some research I carried out a few years ago. All the suggestions are either free or very low cost, and none will take too much time or effort. Some things on the list won't be new ideas to you, but they might act as a gentle reminder that simple, everyday things might have a positive impact on the way our society sees birth and midwifery. No. 26 wasn't on my original list but was a suggestion that Judy Edmunds offered and is something she does herself. Thanks, Judy!

If you are interested in why they work, here is a brief lowdown of some of the main factors involved:

The more people are exposed to hearing about midwifery and gentle birth, the more it will become a norm for them.
Attitudes are formed in childhood; therefore, we need to ensure that children are exposed to these ideas at an early stage.
Experience is an important part in attitude change—if you can encourage people to experience something for themselves, it is much more powerful than telling them about it.
People are more likely to listen to those who appear to understand and sympathise with the other side of the argument. Appearing to be unbiased means you will appear more credible than if you come across as feeling very passionate about your cause (even though the majority of us do feel this way).
Talking to people who support birthing women (partners, grandparents) is just as important as talking to women themselves, because these are the people who influence women's decisions.
Reflecting on past decisions and their outcomes helps us think more logically about why a situation might have happened and discourages us from making (possibly incorrect) assumptions.


http://www.midwiferytoday.com/articles/changebirth.asp
23 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
Highlight: NoneDon't highlight anything 5 newestHighlight 5 most recent replies
So my daughter just had her daughter (Original Post) ismnotwasm Jul 2014 OP
Congratulations voteearlyvoteoften Jul 2014 #1
Thank you ismnotwasm Jul 2014 #2
Congratulations! BainsBane Jul 2014 #3
Fantastic! littlemissmartypants Jul 2014 #4
Congrats to the whole family, Granny M Jul 2014 #5
Congratulations! JustAnotherGen Jul 2014 #6
Congratulations, Grandma! Sheldon Cooper Jul 2014 #7
Mazel Tov! MarianJack Jul 2014 #8
Congratulations! boston bean Jul 2014 #9
Congrats to all! theHandpuppet Jul 2014 #10
Awwwww! I am so happy it all went well! May you all have much happiness together. Squinch Jul 2014 #11
Congratulations! Phentex Jul 2014 #12
Congratulations! brer cat Jul 2014 #13
Congratulations and welcome to the world Little One! Tuesday Afternoon Jul 2014 #14
Congratulations ism! sheshe2 Jul 2014 #15
Aww, congrats, ism. redqueen Jul 2014 #16
Thank you everybody! ismnotwasm Jul 2014 #17
Happy to hear all is well with your daughter and sufrommich Jul 2014 #18
Congrats to your family!! PeaceNikki Jul 2014 #19
YEA... you have a baby. and you got to be there. seabeyond Jul 2014 #20
Hey ismnotwasm Jul 2014 #21
Congratulations! laundry_queen Jul 2014 #22
I'm not one to pile on, but congratulations! That's awesome! nomorenomore08 Jul 2014 #23

JustAnotherGen

(31,810 posts)
6. Congratulations!
Thu Jul 10, 2014, 04:55 AM
Jul 2014

To you and your whole family! And if baby girl some day decides to have children - her birth experience is a "new normal".

Squinch

(50,949 posts)
11. Awwwww! I am so happy it all went well! May you all have much happiness together.
Thu Jul 10, 2014, 07:42 AM
Jul 2014


And it sounds like a wonderful experience. I am so glad that birthing is being treated less like a sporting event than it used to be. OR a catastrophic illness, like it was treated as before that.

ismnotwasm

(41,976 posts)
17. Thank you everybody!
Thu Jul 10, 2014, 01:36 PM
Jul 2014

It really was profound, but what I didn't share is my daughter had preeclampsia-- and it could have gone a very different way. On my way to the hospital I was very frightened for her and the baby

To me, a beautiful birth reinforces the need to get back our reproductive rights, so every child is wanted, and as many woman as possible are able to break out of standard birthing positions, to promote comfort and mother/baby bonding, reduce cesareans, reduce maternal death and disability the world over. To support those who don't wish children, to give complete maternal and moral authority to women.

To let women decide what is right for them.

And get those disgusting laws off our bodies.

sufrommich

(22,871 posts)
18. Happy to hear all is well with your daughter and
Thu Jul 10, 2014, 05:35 PM
Jul 2014

granddaughter and congrats on being a grandmother..again!

 

seabeyond

(110,159 posts)
20. YEA... you have a baby. and you got to be there.
Fri Jul 11, 2014, 08:53 PM
Jul 2014

it all sounds ... well, different than mine. i had nurse bob. loved my nurse bob. (he did the drug, lol). ran into nurse bob at a little kid gymnastic class. a room full of relatively new moms. more than one of us knew nurse bob. lol

what a woman. good for her. give her a hug from us and a kiss on the forehead to the new girl in your world.

laundry_queen

(8,646 posts)
22. Congratulations!
Sun Jul 13, 2014, 02:51 PM
Jul 2014

Love the article...I used to be involved somewhat with the online midwifery community and planned a homebirth with my 2nd. (Long story why it didn't happen...) I really think gentle birth should be the norm and not the exception.

Congratulations to you and your daughter.

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