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Aristus

Aristus's Journal
Aristus's Journal
September 10, 2016

I met with a transgendered patient today.

She had just undergone gender re-assignment surgery three months ago. She was still having some understandable pain and some bleeding, so I referred her to a urologist. She is new to the area. After she underwent the procedure, her family sort of disowned her.

She and I kind of hit it off, mainly over our mutual support for marijuana legalization. I'm not sure she knew what to expect with her new primary care provider, but we had a very pleasant visit.

As she was leaving, she asked me if I had ever had transgendered patients before. I told her "A few, but I haven't seen them for a couple of years." She seemed pleased that I was comfortable around her. I asked her to follow up with me after her visit to the urologist.

I'm glad she likes me. I'm a liberal, and a medical provider. If I can't walk the walk, I may as well turn in my liberal card...

September 10, 2016

Friday Night Wine-Buzz. Plus, two shots of excellent Scotch...

I saw enough patients today to field five basketball teams...



September 5, 2016

I think I'm in love with Samantha Bond.





No. Scratch that. I'm definitely in love with Samantha Bond!


September 5, 2016

Monday, September 5th. The Labor Day Edition of William Shakespeare's Thought For The Day.







"We are but warriors for the working day."

Henry V, Act IV, Scene 3, Line 109.
September 3, 2016

I visited with 104 patients this week...



I don't even want to move...
September 2, 2016

Thursday Night Wine-Buzz. (I'm on call tomorrow night...)

One more day of clinic, and then a three-day weekend.

Next week, I'm getting a reduction in my daily patient load.

Finally managed to get the clinic manager to see reason. You wouldn't believe how many of his family members I had to threaten to get him to reduce my productivity goal to something a little less insane...

August 27, 2016

I had a clinic visit yesterday that should serve as atonement for my sins.

First of all, it was a pediatric visit. I'm not a big fan of pediatrics. But our pediatrician left, and we're still looking to hire another.

Second, it was a two-fer. In the interests of efficient time-use, the parents bring every one in and say: "Just get 'em all done at once."

Third, they were sports physicals. It's back-to-school time again, and every parent with NFL-stars in their eyes wants their little quarterback cleared to train and compete.

Fourth, the 'parent' was a guardian, the patients' mother's boyfriend. His knowledge of my patients' medical history was sketchy, at best. And he brought the youngest child with him. Still in diapers; messy, smelly diapers.

It was as hot as fuck outside, and we're in a small exam room with six people in it. The temperature starts to approach erupting-Mount Doom levels.

The boyfriend still hasn't changed the baby's dirty diaper.

Sports physicals are routine, and usually boring. But I check every boy going out for football for risk factors for sudden cardiac death. That means getting an EKG. The younger brother's EKG was clear. The older brother had some worrying abnormalities on his. So I drew up a referral for an echocardiogram. If that too is abnormal, I will be referring him to a pediatric cardiologist before final approval for play.

The heat is becoming overpowering, and mixed with the aroma of dirty diaper, nauseating. My lab coat has become the world's smallest, hottest prison. But if I take if off now, they'll see me, my shirt, and tie drenched in sweat.

The boyfriend finally decides to go out to the lobby restroom to change the baby's diaper, so I step out to my office for a breath of cool air, and to keep from collapsing.

When he gets back, I have to explain to him and to my patient the meaning of the EKG results, and the process of follow-up. And to assure them both that whatever the trouble might be, it's probably treatable, but I can't give approval for play until the pedes cardiologist weighs in.

When it was all over, I still had to go back to my office and chart both physicals. And then go visit with the four patients who had been out in the waiting room this whole time, tapping their feet and looking at their watches.

In conclusion: I don't know what sins I may have had to atone for, but I can assure you that, whatever they were, they have been amply atoned for by this clinic visit.



August 14, 2016

I saw a motorcycle yesterday with a license plate frame that read "Harley-Davidson - Lawless".

It had valid registration and tags. Since the owner complied meticulously with vehicle registration requirements, I had to wonder what kind of outlaw he was...

Profile Information

Gender: Male
Hometown: Puyallup, Washington
Member since: 2001
Number of posts: 66,310

About Aristus

I truly believe that we will all live in peace and brotherhood someday. And so that I don't lose my faith in humanity, I will live my life as if that day had already happened.
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