George ("I dream of a maggot eating whatever's left of my brain" W. Bush is saying: "I'm not the one saying I should be on Rushmore. It's other people. . . . But Matt, you know what I realized last night? . . . George Washington, who by the way shares two of my initials, was the first veteran president and I was the last. . . . How 'bout that? . . . It's like another reason. . . . But again, it's not me who's saying . . ."

Sean (the man with a merde-tinted nimbus) Hannity I saying: "You know what it is? . . . You know what's at the bottom of all this? . . . Cumulus is dumping me and Fox is given my time-slot to Megyn Kelly because of one thing and one thing only! . . . They're afraid of my ever-surging popularity! . . . I have word that they've even been rigging the audience polls against me. . . .They know I'm bigger than all their other hosts put together, and they're afraid I'll take over."

Bill (“I hate Greek mythology. Proteus scares the stink out of me!”) O’Reilly is saying: “Sacramento's new gender-freedom law means people can call themselves anything they want and change all over the place any and every time they want! . . . Look at me, Bob. . . . I, for one, haven't changed a bit in over 40 years! . . . Would you believe it?"



for another version see the Lounge Captioning thread:

http://www.democraticunderground.com/1018457027

Bill (“My scariest dream is where my body starts leaking, and I wake up screaming.”) O’Reilly is saying: “I don’t understand why people don’t realize what Sacramento’s new gender-free law means. . . . You of all people, Bob, should know that letting people declare their own gender is a horrific idea! . . . What if little Suzy at noon decides she’s a girl and uses the Ladies’s Room at McDonald’s but at six she insists on using the Men’s at Sear's? . . . Within weeks you’re going to have little boys ‘practicing’ with little girls and little girls ‘practicing’ with puppies and puppies going to bed with Suzy’s dad. . . . People will start to forget who they are, and everything will be like thick, stinking psychological-sexual-soup with various appendages and sexual parts floating around! . . . Mark my word! . . . But what I can’t figure out is why nobody sees that!!! . . . And you say? . . . ”

Bill (Wanker Extraordinaire) O'Reilly is saying: "North Carolina's new voter law is misguided in two ways. First they've opened themselves up to charges of racism and voter suppression. Secondly it should be drafted in a manner that gives greater weight to the votes by those who have made our country great and at the same time tighten restrictions to eliminate voter fraud. . . . After all, why should someone who just wants a free lunch have a vote that counts as much as someone who is building this country and paying his taxes? . . . It doesn't make sense. . . . If they follow my advice, they can pitch it as a Voter Enhancement Law, and nobody could possibly claim racism was involved in that! . . . Now its time for our fair-and-balanced debate: Why does Obama hate America so much?"

Sean (Fox's personal black hole) Hannity is saying: "No hard feelings, Megyn, you did what you had to. . . . How could I possibly blame you for #@@@##&^*-ing and **&^#$@^-ing your way into my time slot. Sure, I hope you rot in Hell, but other than that . . ."

Sarah (I can't bear her) Palin is saying: "Well, Bill, if you read the 20,000 pages carefully you'll find reference to 'death panels' all over the document! . . . You see, they use code to confuse people. . . . Sometimes they call them 'discontinuance margins,' and sometimes they call them 'negative factors' or 'overhead control' or 'lowering costs,' you just need to know how to decipher the text. . . . In fact, they have a code for 'holocaust contingencies' as well. . . . Some times they call them . . . (blah, blau, blah)."

Sean ("Still waiting for dawn" Hannity is saying, "Megyn, Megyn, hold on a moment! . . . I'm not blaming you for being a girl, I know you can't help it. . . . Just like I don't blame a shrew for being a shrew, or a collie bitch in heat for being a . . ."

Rush ("I keep dreaming something's leaking out my ears" Limbaugh is saying, "Listen, only losers are fat, and if they're a woman and fat, that's two times worse. . . . But if you're black and fat and a woman all at the same time, you can double that twice again. . . . It's the old math, ladies and gentleman. . . . You see, I come from an earlier, more polite generation."

Sean ("IQs are like golf scores. The higher they are, the worse the person." Hannity is saying: "I'm actually delighted you're taking over my slot, Megyn. . . You see, I'm getting a promotion. It won't involve any more money I'm told (they're even doing some 'reconsiderations'), and it will mean giving up my office for that little one without windows next to the elevator, but they're making me Super-Supreme-Admiral Consultant American-in-Chief and I might get to keep my telephone. . . . In fact, I kinda feel sorry for you, Megyn, but they said they need me urgently. . . . That's the word they used, urgently. . . . What could I do?"