Sheriff David ("Who shot the smart-ass baliff?" ) Clarke: "I'll tell you what it is, Sean. It's what those toe-suckers in the fake media don't want you to find out: that I have been exonerated on all charges. . . .You wait when they squak then Sheriff Joe Arpio and I go in together can create our own Non-Fake Secret Service to replace the one corrupted by the Deep State in order to have Trump assassinated. . . . It's as clear as the face on the front of your head!"



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Above CAPTION based on this article in The Hill:

http://thehill.com/blogs/blog-briefing-room/news/366859-sheriff-clarke-denies-hes-still-under-fbi-investigation-for

Donald Trump is thinking: "Boy! That's great. 'No DACA without wall!' Boy is he right! . . . Let me see (begins tweeting): 'No DACA without funding for my big, beautiful wall. Another example of why @foxandfriends finds me the most decisive and independently-minded president of all times. Next up: Is Amazon stealing your tax dollars? Stay tuned'.' (returns to thinking) : Boy, I wish I didn't have to wait for the commercial to find out what I think."



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Based on a what a guest said on Fox and Friends about what conservatives wanted in 2018. He said they wanted three thingsand one was "No DACA without wall." Within minutesTrump tweeted this:

"The Democrats have been told, and fully understand, that
there can be no DACA without the desperately needed WALL
at the Southern Border and an END to the horrible Chain Migration
& ridiculous Lottery System of Immigration etc. We must protect
our Country at all cost!"

Ed ("Can I see your papers?" ) Henry is saying: "It's clear what Obama meant. . . . By earlier warning that failure to vote could result in the rise of aberrant political forces like National Socialism in the 1930's and now by speaking about how social media can be used to splinter populations, he's obviously saying Trump is Hitler. . . . Nothing could be farther from the truth. . . . But some high-ranking officials would probably want him to know he should use more caution with such comparisons and learn to be more temperate in his language, especially when speaking of our beloved President. . . . It might not be so healthy to call Trump a fascist, if you know what I mean."



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Above CAPTION based on the story at Media-ite:

https://www.mediaite.com/tv/fox-news-ed-henry-hits-obama-for-playing-games-hes-comparing-trump-to-hitler-just-say-it/

Donald ("Who are you going to believe, your h*rdon or your head?" )Trump is saying: "I certainly don't want to undercut Mueller's bogus investigation-slash-witch-hunt, but I wonder why we are expected to trust the F.B.I. anyway? . . . Just because they caught a couple spies in the past (and that was with the C.I.A., by the way. . . I'm just saying)? . . . Or maybe we're expected to trust them because majority of people generally like large figures like J. Edgar Hoover, even though he wore women's panties and liked someone always hanging on his agenda, if you know what I mean. . . . Who could trust a guy like that? . . . And they're always messing up kidnappings except on t.v. and in the movies and in those self-serving books they write about themselves after their pathetic careers are over and they've got nothing better to do than harassing conservatives, this time at town halls and in public parks and write crappy books and letters to the editor with terrible grammar, because they don't always have a ghost writer. . . . It's all like an excuse for defrauding the government for twenty years or more. . . . I mean, I don't want to undermine them, but . . "

Pete ("I got out on the wrong side of the coffin this morning" ) Hegseth is saying: "The U.N. voting so heavily against us last week was just the last straw! . . . I say we pull out and start our own league of friendly nations. . . . What would be the harm in that? . . . We'd save a lot of money and we can put the league of friends up in less than half a wings at Trump's best Manhattan hotel. . . . It's a win-win best I can make out."



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Above CAPTION based on this creep actually said on the following clip posted at Media Matters (I only added to the last 3 sentences):

https://www.mediamatters.org/video/2017/12/22/fox-host-united-nations-nothing-anti-american-anti-israeli-anti-semitic-cesspool/218939

Rep. Francis Rooney (R, FL) just finished saying: "Hallie, just how is it to say that the F.B.I. should be purged of a cancer at the very top and so needs this brain tumor removed as swiftly and effectively as possible, to use your words, 'loose talk'? . . . Sounds normal to me."


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Above CAPTION based on the lovely clip at Crooks & Liars:

https://crooksandliars.com/2017/12/fl-goper-congressman-calls-fbi-and-doj

Mike ("I've a tattoo of crossed fingers on the small of my back" ) Pence is saying, "Thank the Good Lord and Donald Trump, we can now say 'Merry Christmas' once again. . . . You can't believe how long I've been holding that in!"

Ivanka is thinking: "I've just got to remember to keep somebody between us."

Melania is thinking: "He better not try to hold my hand again this week. . . . He's already three-and-a-half over his quota."

Donald Trump is thinking: "If it's in a skirt . . ."

The Pope is thinking: "I'd rather be left alone in a room with rabid ferrets."

Devin ("All I want for Christmas is an I.Q. over 51" ) Nunes is saying: "Chris, I'd tell my critics this: it's because of the law that I want to get together with a group of fellow, concerned Republican congressmen and issue a report on the corruption of our chief law enforcement agency, the F.B.I. . . . After all, we only want the truth, and since they're our nation's eyes and ears, it's essential that we believe them. . . But until they learn to tell us what we 'only want,' how can we even begin to listen, much less believe what they might say? . . . In fact, it's precisely because I haven't listened to them that I know the truth. . . . It's just common sense."



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Above CAPTION based on the following tory at The Hill:

http://thehill.com/homenews/house/366411-house-intelligence-chairman-working-on-corruption-report-in-fbi-wapost

Mitch ("I heard the truth once. Almost drove me insane." ) McConnell is saying: "When I said, Mr. President, that there are not enough hyperboles in creation to express my awe of you and what you have accomplished, I was speaking not only for the entire Republican Caucus of today, but all Republican Caucus's in the past and in future. . . . And I say that without the least wisp of exaggeration. believe me."